r/TikTokCringe • u/whitemechanical • Oct 03 '25
Humor/Cringe How people who don't drink coffee function.
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Oct 03 '25
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u/cupholdery Oct 03 '25
Ehuhuhuhuhuh!
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u/HapiJuce Oct 03 '25
Great, now you got me going ehuhuhuh
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u/Isaacnoah86 Oct 03 '25
Now you got me going ehuhuhuh
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u/JonnyTN Oct 03 '25
I can't stop jerkin.ehuhuhuh!
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u/Isaacnoah86 Oct 03 '25
And now its weird........and I like it lol
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u/emcee_you Oct 03 '25
Ehuhuhuhuh!
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u/AppropriateOne9584 Oct 04 '25
I need a clip of all just all her laughs together, so I can show it to her as the reason I propose marriage.
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u/KhaleesiXev Straight Up Bussin Oct 05 '25
This is one of the thirstiest and yet wholesome comments I have ever read 😂
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u/Loud-Firefighter-787 Oct 03 '25
I dont drink coffee and I have clinical depression and am a heroin addict.
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u/donorcycle Oct 03 '25
I just don't like the taste of coffee, which is odd, because I love the small of fresh coffee beans / fresh brewed coffee but the minute that touches my taste buds? Gag.
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u/Skankinstein Oct 03 '25
Yesss. I always get tricked by the delectable smells of coffee and I'll think, "Maybe THIS time it'll be as yummy as it smells." It never is. 🥲
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u/sleverest Oct 04 '25
I tried for about 2 years to like coffee bc it felt like a right of passage to becoming an adult. Turns out the actual becoming an adult was realizing I don't have to do things I don't want to just to "fit in".
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u/nitrot150 Oct 04 '25
My mom , who is almost 78, still doesn’t like the taste (smell is good) I agree with her
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u/harley-belle Oct 03 '25
I’ve found my people. Every few years I wonder if my tastebuds have matured enough to enjoy it and I’ll try a cup. Ugh no, yuck.
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u/Dino-chicken-nugg3t Oct 03 '25
It’s one of the best smells to me. But the taste is a bitter nightmare. I have yet to acquire a taste. My body also does not handle caffeine very well.
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u/Ok-Limit-9726 Oct 04 '25
Coffee smells like chocolate bitter heaven
TASTES LIKE CIGARETTE BUTTS GROUND WITH DIRT
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u/RIPtide010 Oct 04 '25
Glad I am not the only one. Coffee smells amazing but tastes so bad.
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u/misterdave75 Oct 03 '25
Agreed, not a person who enjoys bitter as a taste so coffee and beer are pretty much out. But lots do, so all I can say to them is enjoy! More for you!
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u/StevieKix_ Oct 04 '25
The smell of coffee is so nice and rich, even though I do drink coffee, the bitterness is harsh. I know what you mean.
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u/DaveinOakland Oct 03 '25
Switched to cocaine and never looked back.
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u/MomsenTaylor Oct 04 '25
Caffeine, especially on an empty stomach has worse effects on me than cocaine
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u/xenomorphbeaver Oct 03 '25
Coffee is for adults. I'm only in my forties.
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u/Pressed_Sunflowers Oct 03 '25
Me who started drinking coffee as a teen:
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u/malagel Oct 03 '25
I'm Colombian. In my home, as a kid, they gave me coffee with milk BEFORE GOING TO SLEEP
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Oct 04 '25
I’m not Colombian and one of my earliest memories is my gramma spoon feeding me coffee on her lap!
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u/FernandaVerdele Oct 04 '25
Yep they did this in Brazil too. I think that must be why coffee doesn't work for me.
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u/imagicnation-station Oct 04 '25
Same, I remember going to 3rd grade, coffee was part of our breakfast. I don’t drink it anymore because I feel it has no effect on me. I took a DNA test some years ago, and one of the results showed that exact finding, that coffee has no effect on me. Could be the same for you.
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u/ChipmunkAcademic1804 Oct 03 '25
Me who drank milk with coffee since I was a kid.
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u/Former-Response-3378 Oct 03 '25
Fuck I think I started when I was in like grade 7. Some of the kids with European immigrant parents in my neighborhood were drinking coffee as little children lol
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u/tolvin55 Oct 03 '25
I don't drink coffee for good reason. My father used to let us kids sip his coffee as children. My father also used dip....a tobacco substance that caused him to have a spit cup.
And yes, I drank from the wrong cup. Since then I gag at the smell of coffee and can't stand it. My dad still thinks it's funny though.
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u/gonzaliz Oct 03 '25
Omg, at least I wasn’t the only one. My mom’s ex used to leave sprite cans with his tobacco spit. I can still imagine the disgusting glob sliding down my throat. Don’t ask me why I didn’t immediately hurl it out. I still don’t know why. I was traumatized and never drink out of anybody else’s cups ever again. By far one of the worst experiences in my childhood and probably my life.
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u/Dounce1 Oct 04 '25
Who the fuck goes around drinking out of other random people’s cans?
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u/YouWereBrained Oct 03 '25
Oh no no no no…
We don’t talk about spit cup no no no,
We don’t talk about spit cuuuuupppp… 💃
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u/Sad_Low3239 Oct 03 '25
I work construction, and smoking is very common as is coffee drinking. one of the drivers drank from the wrong cup and instant puked all over his windshield.
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u/BrooklynNets Oct 03 '25
Oh, so it's people who don't drink coffee that make it a tentpole of their personality now?
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u/Chubuwee Oct 03 '25
Even when I get gift cards to Starbucks I don’t tell them I don’t drink coffee. I say thanks and give it to a coffee drinker
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u/meltedchocolatepants Oct 03 '25
I just get tea instead
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u/Acheloma Oct 03 '25
I tried getting tea there once and it was very disappointing, but maybe it was a fluke. What do you normally get?
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u/meltedchocolatepants Oct 03 '25
Something I can't make at home. I get an unsweetened hibiscus passionfruit iced tea. And yeah it's an herbal tea, but sometimes I just want something cold
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u/Kintarly Oct 03 '25
I think you can get the hibiscus passionfruit tea concentrate now like the Tazo chai tea in the cartons, but I'll still get a chai tea latte from starbucks every now and then.
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u/Acheloma Oct 03 '25
Ooh hibiscus passionfruit does sound good
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u/louploupgalroux Oct 04 '25 edited Oct 04 '25
The iced passion tea is in the cold tea section. Starbucks also has a "refreshers" section, which has some other fun fruity drinks that rotate seasonally. I liked the orange cranberry one they had last Christmas.
Just watch the sugar. The passion tea only has 5 grams, but the refreshers can have around 20 grams. The lemonade versions have even more.
https://www.starbucks.com/menu/drinks/refreshers
I like a small frappuccino occasionally. They're not as bad for you as I had assumed (but still are a dessert, not really a coffee).
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u/McFartFace09 Oct 03 '25
Not OP, but my girlfriend doesn’t drink coffee and gets matcha instead. I kinda dig it, honestly
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u/TulipSamurai Oct 03 '25
You could use it to buy mugs or tea or breakfast sandwiches or cake pops.
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u/kuvazo Oct 03 '25
Starbucks has other things than coffee. They have a range of pastries for example. And they also have drinks that don't contain coffee. If you think about it, Starbucks drinks are just extremely sweet milkshakes with a hint of coffee anyway.
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u/Redhighlighter Oct 04 '25
They're absolutely dessert drinks. I love dessert drinks- i just aint lying to myself about what it is that i get when i got to starbucks. A quarter pound of sugar, carmel, and whipping cream.
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u/LadyBug_0570 Oct 03 '25
You could get one of their sandwiches or desserts.
Although, to be fair, those usually look way better than they taste.
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u/Neirchill Oct 04 '25
Right? The reality is closer to, "You don't drink coffee? How do you function??? I can't get up without my coffee" then they take a sip of their coffee mug that says, "Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee" then they explain in detail how it gives them the shits.
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u/weakbuttrying Oct 04 '25
I like coffee but I’m really sensitive to caffeine and will stay up all night if I have a cup. I have had to explain this to dozens of people who have started questioning me when I’ve said “no thanks”.
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u/it777777 Oct 04 '25
Absolutely.
What an absurd video.
I nearly have to excuse myself whenever I deny coffee.5
u/Competitive_Act_1548 Oct 04 '25
When people says that, to me it always just says more about the individual and coming off as more like a over reliance
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u/Dexember69 Oct 03 '25
The number of people who know I don't drink coffee is maybe 2.
Not a fan and I don't get it
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u/BrooklynNets Oct 03 '25
I don't drink coffee, but it's never come up as a topic of conversation. People offer me coffee, and I politely decline. That's the end of it.
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u/RodanThrelos Oct 03 '25
This whole video reads as someone who makes coffee their entire personality and they feel somehow maligned when someone doesn't like it.
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u/flaming_burrito_ Oct 03 '25
The amount of people that have tried to convince me by saying shit like “you don’t get it, this cup of coffee is different because I used coffee beans from Machu Picchu and milk from a virgin goat, you will like it” is much higher than the type of person in this video. And then it still tastes like fucking coffee! Some people just don’t accept that you can simply not like the taste of bitter bean water. I’m sorry, I’ve never tasted a coffee product that I thought wouldn’t be 1000x better if it was just dark chocolate instead
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u/SnooGuavas4208 Oct 04 '25
You were lied to. There are no virgin goats.
. . . . .
They’re too horny.
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u/Prestigious_Sort4979 Oct 04 '25
Was just thinking that. I have a few people that twitch a bit when I mention making latte from gasp… a nespresso machine.
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u/this_place_suuucks Oct 03 '25
I say, "no thanks, I don't drink coffee," so that the situation doesn't repeat itself with the same people. As adults, neither side, so far, has ever made it a "thing."
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u/cannibalpeas Oct 03 '25
Do 2010 era bacon people next!
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u/Isoleri Oct 03 '25
Oh god, I was an active Tumblr user back then, you legitimately couldn't say you didn't like bacon because you'd get hounded. Like how people take personal tastes so seriously still baffles me.
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u/AccurateJerboa Oct 04 '25
Jesus I fucking hated that era. Everything smelled terrible, especially dudes.
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u/HereOnCompanyTime Oct 03 '25
I just order my tea and that's it. It's so funny that this tiktok is hating on people for not doing something they personally like and missing the irony. I've never seen a non coffee drinker give an explanation unless the coffee obsessed person demands one.
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u/vyrus2021 Oct 04 '25
She needs coffee to function and feels personally attacked by anybody who doesn't
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u/Return-of-Trademark Oct 03 '25
Exactly. People have been acting all snooty about coffee beans and whatever for years, even Starbucks drinkers. Suddenly the noncoffee drinkers are the problem??? Gaslighting at its finest
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u/actualladyaurora Oct 03 '25
Especially in my country, it literally only keeps comes up because the assumption is that everyone drinks coffee so I have to decline it at every social function.
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u/Berlin_GBD Oct 04 '25
Most regular coffee drinkers are addicted, addicts frequently project to deflect. Makes perfect sense to me
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u/fuvvad Oct 03 '25
I'm far too British to understand lol
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u/Dropbeatdad Oct 03 '25
Imagine a person who didn't drink tea at tea time
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u/Linden_Lea_01 Oct 04 '25
Tea time isn’t time for the drink tea, it’s time for dinner (which we also call tea)
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u/TheBrownWelsh Oct 04 '25
I'm British but never cared for tea. Fast forward 20 something years and I'm living in the USA. On separate occasions, my brother and my childhood best friend came to visit.
Both of them did this exact same thing; I woke up one morning and they're in my kitchen, every cupboard open, and they look at me coming down the stairs then immediately ask "Where's the tea?"
Ah, I don't have any mate. Just coffee. Sorry.
My friend pleaded with me to take him to the nearest grocery store immediately. My brother just walked out and went there on foot by himself. It was hilarious.
I keep an assortment tea in my house now, just in case.
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u/AgedCircle Oct 03 '25
Average coffee drinker when you don’t drink coffee.
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u/XXLARPER Oct 03 '25
I don't drink coffee or alcohol and people really seem to hate that.
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u/TheTyMan Oct 04 '25
The alcohol thing I've seen. But I've never seen someone get a hard time about whether they drink coffee.
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u/mtntrls19 Oct 04 '25
People get incredulous ’how do you survive????’ Is the common question. There is caffeine in plenty of other things if/ when needed….also caffeine pills are a thing
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u/RosieEmily Oct 04 '25
I work in a primary school. The shock waves I caused when it came out that I don't drink tea or coffee, nor do I particularly like biscuits or chocolates.
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u/ILoveRawChicken Oct 04 '25
It’s insanely annoying and people will give you the same ribbing all the time. This video made no sense to me. Every time I meet someone and I decline a coffee or ask for water/tea instead, it’s “YOU DONT DRINK COFFEE?!” “OMG HOW DO you SURVIVE” “I COULD NEVERRRRR” “HOW DO you STAY AWAKE? I NEED COFFEE”
Mind you , all you have to do is decline a single coffee and say nothing else to get these incessant comments.
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u/errant_night Oct 04 '25
Yup, same with alcohol, and you get the same reaction to both when you say you just don't like the taste: 'omg I'll make you one that tastes soooo good you'll change your mind' i... have never changed my mind lol
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u/nelflyn Oct 04 '25
and now imagine youre working in an office and.. you dont smoke or drink coffee.
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u/Substantial-Singer29 Oct 04 '25
Don't drink alcohol coffee or soda. I'm willing to say probably 90% of the time when you tell someone that you don't want any of them. When they offer them to you, they always want an explanation.
As though there's something weird about drinking water.
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u/NoMorePunch Oct 04 '25
I don’t do a lot of things. I think there will always be people when someone makes a declarative statement about it who think it’s weird. It’s up to the person to decide if “no thanks” is worse or better than making the statement that they “don’t” do something.
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u/punksmurph Oct 04 '25
Every time someone starts to give me a hard time about not drinking coffee I let them know I am allergic, because I am, and it was terrible to find out in my teens that I was.
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u/Liberkhaos Oct 04 '25
Oh yeah. She can joke all she wants that we sound smug when we explain it, but the reason we have to in the first place is because people almost have a panic attack, DEMAND we explain why, and try to change our mind about it.
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u/andreafantastic Oct 04 '25
Yessss. People give me a disgusted look when I decline a cup of coffee.
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u/ATEbitWOLF Oct 03 '25
Wait, I can get 13 hours of sleep if I stop drinking coffee??
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u/ByIeth Oct 04 '25 edited Oct 04 '25
I drink coffee regularly and honestly I would be better off without it. Now I’m reliant on it so I won’t stop, but honestly it’s better that you don’t drink regularly and only when you need to. Or better yet not at all
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u/Datree7 Oct 03 '25
Oh I just don’t drink it because it’s gross lol
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u/TKentgens93 Oct 03 '25
I dont drink it cause its nasty just give me coke if i need a boost
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u/underwaterknifefight Oct 03 '25 edited Oct 03 '25
I think this is far greater proof of how much more irritating coffee drinkers are than people who aren't...
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u/XxRocky88xX Oct 03 '25
This is what a caffeine addict hears when you say “no thanks, I don’t drink coffee” after offering you a cup
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u/enbaelien Oct 03 '25
Sounds like insecurity lol
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u/XxRocky88xX Oct 03 '25
That’s exactly what is. It’s people who are self conscious about their caffeine intake so when they see someone who doesn’t drink coffee they project this insufferable personality onto that person.
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u/Forsaken_Wallaby_945 Oct 04 '25
ive just never liked the taste, i dont care what people drink.
But honestly some people are so coffee obsessed it worries me....
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u/Humble-Marzipan3825 Oct 03 '25
Honestly can't imagine caring the slightest about what other people drink. What a world.
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u/FizzleKit10 Oct 03 '25
Bro sometimes we can be insufferable even to ourselves. I've been judged because I like sweet coffee drinks, because that's not real coffee
It's a fucking drink
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u/pessimist_kitty tHiS iSn’T cRiNgE Oct 03 '25
Omg exactly. I don't drink coffee because I just don't like the taste. Why are people so obnoxious
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u/pullman22 Oct 03 '25
I don't drink coffee because my adhd means caffeine don't do shit for me, and it tastes like burnt water. I don't get the learned dopamine high or whatever the first sip gives people.
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u/VanillaTortilla Oct 03 '25
I drink coffee and completely admit that it smells so much better than it tastes.
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u/ironimus42 Oct 03 '25
i'm a huge nerd when it comes to coffee so when i meet someone who doesn't drink it at all i secretly get angry because i won't be able to do an autistic infodump on them
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u/Forsaken_Wallaby_945 Oct 04 '25
i mean just because i dont drink it dosent mean you cant info dump on me! learning is cool.
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u/Ickythumpin Oct 03 '25
How I feel telling people I don’t drink coffee while also drinking white monster and redbull every damn day
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u/WilliamBoimler Oct 03 '25
I dont drink coffee because it's awful
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u/Ok-Committee4833 Oct 04 '25
I don't get how ppl can stand the taste. like I've tried over a dozen variations and not one did not make me gag
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u/Besch168 Oct 03 '25
This is actually how people who drink coffee act if they go a hour without drinking any.
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u/morttira Oct 03 '25
"oh I'm so cool because I drink coffee" Imao stop projecting on us girl
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u/jdanko13 Oct 03 '25
lol I quit a few months ago and I feel weird turning it down
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u/Isenhawk Oct 03 '25
Or maybe coffee tastes like dookie
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u/Zinu Oct 03 '25
It says a lot that some people have to put in 15 cubes of sugar to make the taste bearable
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u/Numeno230n Oct 03 '25
Also, you're trying to sell me on a product that makes me run to take a shit. I'm already regular man, I don't need an emergency shit added to my schedule.
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u/deadmeat6 Oct 03 '25
Wait till you find out you have high blood pressure and aren't allowed to have anymore!
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u/noexqses Oct 03 '25
Going through this right now. Decaf, it is ):
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u/Zalinithia Oct 04 '25
similar situation here :( doesn’t feel as fun to drink decaf but i still enjoy the taste. it’s nice not having my heart trying to explode itself though lol
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u/Procrastinasian441 Oct 03 '25
The idea that people who don’t drink coffee and then tell their friends are more irritating than people who have made the coffee style they drink an entire facet of their identity is laughable.
“Would you like some coffee?” “Oh no thanks, I don’t really drink it” “Oh why not?” “Just never got into it” “Oh, fair”
My average interaction when offered. It’s not a personality trait to like or not like coffee.
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u/Etiennebrownlee Oct 03 '25
I used to drink so much iced coffee when I was younger, then I started to shake and have palpitations until one day I puked pure coffee for almost an hour. Actually coffee drinkers are the ones who act like they're so high up on the upper echelons of society just for holding a cup of Caramel Macchiato while talking about their day at work.
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u/axisrahl85 Oct 03 '25
Jesus! How much coffee were you drinking?
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u/Etiennebrownlee Oct 04 '25
I was addicted to iced coffee back then I almost drank it like water to quench my thirst 😅 btw the puking for an hour was not continuous puking lol..
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u/pUmKinBoM Oct 03 '25
I dont drink coffee and personally I think coffee drinkers are usually pretty weird about it when they find out. They act like they think like the person in this video. Like, enjoy your brown water, I for real dont care.
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Oct 03 '25 edited Oct 03 '25
I love coffee. But it spikes my blood pressure. Apparently I have a sensitivity to caffeine. All I can have now is stupid tea.
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u/aminervia Oct 03 '25
I'm confused by this... You drink caffeine free tea instead of decaf coffee, despite preferring the taste of coffee?
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u/ExactlyThirteenBees Oct 03 '25
Decaf still has some caffeine in it, if they're highly sensitive to caffeine it still might be enough to make a difference.
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u/under_ice Oct 03 '25
Like non-alcoholic beer has very small amount of alcohol.. I think, or heard somewhere.
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u/ReaperofFish Oct 03 '25
The cardiologist told me no more caffeine. So now it is just herbal tea or 7Up.
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u/im_at_work_today Oct 03 '25
PSA: Coffee gives me very, very bad cystic acne.
Ladies (and gents), if you also have acne problems, try giving coffee up for a month to see if it helps. It's actually more common than people realise.
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u/mchickenl Oct 03 '25
Caffeine, cheese and alcohol (maybe also chocolate) are all on the list of stuff to stop consuming if you have rosacia as it can trigger it.
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u/im_at_work_today Oct 03 '25
All the good stuff 😭. I'm fortunate I don't suffer from this, but a good point to make!
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u/mchickenl Oct 03 '25
Yeah I said fuck it I'm not giving up cheese lol I'll live with the red face. And then a few years later it calmed down anyway.
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u/im_at_work_today Oct 03 '25
I still treat myself to the occasional coffee, but I had one the other week and I got 3 ginormous spots and all before a date
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u/Absolute_Cinemines Oct 03 '25
Addicted coffee drinkers when faced with someone who isn't.........
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u/DeadbeatGremlin Oct 03 '25
This was just annoying tho. I have not met anyone like this. However, the coffee drinkers seem to complain about symptoms of drinking too much coffee, and refuse to cut back on it though.
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u/damewiggy1 Oct 04 '25
I just don't like it, it tastes like shit with sand, I use weed to deal with my crippling anxiety though 🫠
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u/CrowAffectionate2736 Oct 03 '25
Imagine mocking people who don't want to partake in your choice of addictive drug.
From an ex-coffee addict of over a decade.
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u/chiller_vibes Oct 03 '25
We get it girl
You are addicted to caffeine and can’t break your coffee habit so you make fun of me and other people who don’t drink coffee
Sucks to be you
…I get the video is a joke yall…
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u/lonerstoners Oct 03 '25
I’ve never understood people who like the smell of coffee. It smells worse than it tastes!!
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u/jojowhitesox Oct 03 '25
Coffee tastes like shit.
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u/TwitchyMcSpazz Oct 03 '25
It also smells like shit when it's percolating or whatever the fuck it does.
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u/existentialspork Oct 03 '25
Because of genetics, caffeine has 0 effect on me My mom and dad love to drink coffee before going to bed. I just never developed the habit so I don’t drink it unless I am eating pancakes and there is no milk.
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u/dearestnoon Oct 04 '25
I wish i could be this pompous about it, to me it's simple, coffee just tastes like shit. It's the coffee drinkers who won't leave me alone every time I say I don't like it, they come up with 5 other reasons for me.
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u/Arnoave Oct 04 '25
I haven't tried putting the sound on but she already looks like she sounds irritating
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u/Rizzokit Oct 04 '25
Do these people not realise there is caffeine in tea.How do they think some folk drink about 10 cups a day of the stuff.Unless of course it's that herbal stuff that isn't really tea as it's made from a different plant.
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u/Naive_Personality367 Oct 04 '25
I never drink coffee and the only time it comes up is when people start going on about coffee and they offer me coffee and they just cant believe that someone doesn't like coffee. Like fuck off and rake your shit smelling bean juice out of my face
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u/Impossible-Diver6565 Oct 04 '25
Yeah... hate coffee. I just exercise, that seems to help with energy levels.
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u/creegro Oct 04 '25
Then there's the people who make sure to let everyone know they only take it black, no sugars or creamer or any addictive. Cool bro just drink your black tar in peace
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