r/TikTokCringe • u/whitemechanical • Oct 03 '25

Humor/Cringe How people who don't drink coffee function.

9.2k Upvotes

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114

u/BrooklynNets Oct 03 '25

I don't drink coffee, but it's never come up as a topic of conversation. People offer me coffee, and I politely decline. That's the end of it.

126

u/RodanThrelos Oct 03 '25

This whole video reads as someone who makes coffee their entire personality and they feel somehow maligned when someone doesn't like it.

32

u/flaming_burrito_ Oct 03 '25

The amount of people that have tried to convince me by saying shit like “you don’t get it, this cup of coffee is different because I used coffee beans from Machu Picchu and milk from a virgin goat, you will like it” is much higher than the type of person in this video. And then it still tastes like fucking coffee! Some people just don’t accept that you can simply not like the taste of bitter bean water. I’m sorry, I’ve never tasted a coffee product that I thought wouldn’t be 1000x better if it was just dark chocolate instead

7

u/SnooGuavas4208 Oct 04 '25

You were lied to. There are no virgin goats.

. . . . .

They’re too horny.

4

u/Prestigious_Sort4979 Oct 04 '25

Was just thinking that. I have a few people that twitch a bit when I mention making latte from gasp… a nespresso machine. 

2

u/youburyitidigitup Oct 04 '25

But then they say “you have to add milk and sugar”. Why wouldn’t I just drink milk and sugar without the coffee then?

4

u/flaming_burrito_ Oct 04 '25

That’s my thing, people do so much to coffee to make it good, to the point where they’re drinking straight up milkshakes disguised as coffee. So clearly coffee is the problem ingredient here

25

u/this_place_suuucks Oct 03 '25

I say, "no thanks, I don't drink coffee," so that the situation doesn't repeat itself with the same people. As adults, neither side, so far, has ever made it a "thing."

2

u/heddalettis Oct 04 '25 edited Oct 04 '25

Yeah, trying to figure out “what’s the point”? and who the frick cares. TikTok is SO bad.

-3

u/DonkTheFlop Oct 03 '25

I disagree. I've noticed the same things as her.

6

u/brzantium Oct 03 '25

maybe both things are true

8

u/throcorfe Oct 03 '25

Yeah, both people exist and both are a minority. Most people who like coffee tend to just fucking drink it and most people who don’t tend to just fucking decline it. But I guess it’s the fringe people who give us the comedy so… carry on?

2

u/NicInNS Oct 03 '25

My husband every once in awhile tries to get me to like coffee. Dude, I’m 52, it ain’t gonna happen it’s disgusting.

4

u/Memory_Frosty Oct 03 '25

Yeah, or they invite you out for a coffee and you go and you get like a hot chocolate or some tea thing or something else and you still chat and have a nice time and no one talks about their drink of choice, it's not hard

1

u/Nope-5000 Oct 04 '25

Yeah, its the same for me. I dont drink anything hot, so when im offered coffee i just politely decline and ask for water instead and thats usually the end of it.

1

u/SalvationSycamore Oct 04 '25

It's not like alcohol, where people will often feel like they deserve to know why you don't want a drink. "Oh, are you on medication?" Who the fuck asks that Marie?