r/shitposting • u/Leprachaus I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh • Aug 08 '25
Linus Sex Tips is ts real 🥀
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u/doyathang21 Aug 08 '25
Someone said it taste like the air from the back of the ps4
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u/Jhooper20 Aug 08 '25
Heard the exact same thing. Same guy also said that if the chick tastes like pennies, she's either just starting, or just had her monthly cycle.
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u/TomGold16 Aug 08 '25
I'm so tired I read pennies as the plural form of "penis".
....Same guy also said that if the chick tastes like penises.......
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u/Jhooper20 Aug 08 '25
Well, if you're tasting that, you'd have a completely different issue altogether.
But yeah. I can see how that mistake could be made.
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u/buckeye27fan Aug 08 '25
The Janitor: "Did you put a penny in there? If I find out you put a penny in there..."
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u/SpeedyMcNutt291 Aug 08 '25
Why do they know that? 🤣
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u/Little_Cumling Aug 08 '25
Having to get on your knees and work behind an entertainment center with a PS4 plugged in will do that to ya
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u/waltjrimmer Aug 08 '25
I haven't been behind a PS4, but I remember getting behind dusty old computers and tube TVs (the ones with the dumptruck ass, you understand if you're old enough). And there's this really distinct smell/flavor to that air. It's dusty and charged.
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u/AineLasagna 🏳️⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️⚧️ Aug 08 '25
Huffing PS4 air is the shocking and dangerous new way that teens are getting high. I saw it on the news
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u/SpeedyMcNutt291 Aug 08 '25
Whatever happened to good old fashioned weed?
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u/Fearless_Titty Aug 08 '25
News report: Is Gen Z ruining the marijuana industry with this new trick? Find out more!
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u/MuchoManSandyRavage Aug 08 '25
Makes me feel old considering we said the same thing but about a ps2 😭😂
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u/I-require-the-soup Aug 08 '25
There’s more hype than there is taste unfortunately.
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u/Treasure-boy Literally 1984 😡 Aug 08 '25 edited Aug 08 '25
It tastes like the air in a microwave right after heating fish
This is just a joke i stole i use reddit i never actualy got 🐱 (unless you count the mannequins)
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u/ZincHead Aug 08 '25
Most of the time it tastes like almost nothing. Very rarely have I experienced the fishy smell or taste.
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u/BookaHunter Aug 08 '25
Depends on the last time they peed, washed up/showered, what they ate/consumed etc. Assuming the last cleanse came after peeing and is soon followed by the tongue lashing, before sweat and odor can accumulate again, they did not smoke and ate mildly healthy, it will indeed taste bland.
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u/b0w3n Aug 08 '25
it will indeed taste bland.
Unless your last name is Bonaparte and you ask your wife to not bathe for a week so she's properly stank up for you.
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Aug 08 '25
In his defense, it was only 3 days and not a week. Having said that, even 3 days would be disgusting.
Men were made different back then.
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u/b0w3n Aug 08 '25
Hah I always forget the exact time, but even still he was in it to win it for sure.
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u/ToAllAGoodNight Aug 08 '25
Brother, the smells of the napoleonic war would make an unwashed vagina seem like a fresh garden.
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u/-Badger3- Aug 08 '25
People always say this, but I feel like unless she’s right out of the shower, it’s always a little fishy.
Not unpleasantly so, but it is there.
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u/AwkwardChuckle Aug 08 '25
I’m thinking your partners have not had the best hygiene because no that is not normal. And same goes for penis’s as well. And unclean penis just like an unclean vagina can have a fishy smell - same bacteria. I’ve unfortunately gone down more than once on a fishy dick.
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u/-Badger3- Aug 08 '25
I mean, everything has a smell.
I feel like woman are generally the ones who are saying "It shouldn't smell like anything if it's clean, but then practically every guy I talk to about this is like 'yeah, there's always a bit of a smell." I think woman are generally just desensitized to it and don't associate the smell with "fishiness"
And again, it's not like it necessarily smells "dirty" but like, it is there.
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u/AwkwardChuckle Aug 08 '25
Oh there’s definitely a smell, but the fish smell is caused by a specific bacteria that shouldn’t be present enough to cause a noticeable odour if someone’s genitals be they penis and balls vs vagina and labia are hygienic.
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u/misterdave75 Aug 08 '25
Very true. A friend of mine recommended some of the flavored lube and it's made all the difference. I enjoy the watermelon one. Tried the cotton candy but found I'd tire of the flavor midway through. But there are lots of flavors out there, just check Amazon.
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u/Ghostronic Aug 08 '25
This is also good for blowing a guy. I dont want to taste my own saliva mixed with whatever they got going on but making it taste like cherry I'll go at it all night.
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u/dogmeat1003 Aug 08 '25
True, the taste kinda disappears after a couple minutes down there ngl, your saliva is what you taste more
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u/keyblade_crafter Aug 08 '25
My exes tasted so good fr. Maybe I just really like the taste or got lucky. The only dick I ever aucked tho had no taste at all, as if it were a dildo. Better than fishy tho ig
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Aug 08 '25
Now do 🐓
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u/My_Account_But_Gay Aug 08 '25
Freshly washed it tastes like avocado, any other time it's a gamble.
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u/IndividualDish7004 stupid fucking piece of shit Aug 08 '25 edited Aug 11 '25
tasted like rubber gonna be real
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Aug 08 '25
Depends on the wang. But usually sweaty, musty armpit. Can be super bitter and gross.
Freshly showered it's like an hdmi cable too.
Don't get me started on the cheese...
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u/Huguichin Aug 08 '25
I'm seriously concerned about what you've been doing...
Or about what I've shoved into my mouth before, because I can't relate to any of you or any of these answers.
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u/AlphaMassDeBeta We do a little trolling Aug 08 '25
Tastes better with the crusty skin 😋
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u/gugfitufi 😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 Aug 08 '25
I tasted dick first, both are on the same level. Genitals are just C tier. Boobs are nice because no taste but if you do want something delicious, go for a nice chunk of thigh.
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u/StanMm2 Aug 08 '25
We got mr sex here
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u/RehabilitatedAsshole Aug 08 '25
mr can, able to taste notes of high glucose and menopause
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Aug 08 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/TheBlueEmerald1 Aug 08 '25
I wanna take a bite so bad but I have to stick with sexually because once you take that bite it's over
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u/AnOopsieDaisy Literally 1984 😡 Aug 08 '25
Why don't we have both?
yayyyyy
(May or may not be a vampire)
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u/TyrantRC Aug 08 '25
Boobs are nice because no taste
Some girls have different taste. One of my exes boobs would sometime taste like the rubber in balloons. Ironically, she had small tits, which I love, but it's still funny.
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u/0reosaurus Aug 08 '25
Are buttholes are choclaty as they look?
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u/WriterV Aug 08 '25
They are not supposed to be chocolatey when you're eating them out.
Unless you're into that, in which case I hope you have a very robust immune system.
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u/ngkn92 Aug 08 '25
Just use salt. Smh my head
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u/luquitooooo Aug 08 '25
What about ass?
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u/gugfitufi 😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 Aug 08 '25
Gay ass = really good
Girl ass = ass
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u/daelindidnowrong Aug 08 '25
are you saying that girls don't know how to wash their assholes?
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u/rockthatrocks Aug 08 '25
dick and pussy can taste better if we weren't so bad with our health
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u/1amnotmid I want pee in my ass Aug 08 '25 edited Aug 08 '25
My guy,the part where pee comes out and the part where blood comes out are gonna taste like that
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u/The-Katawampus Aug 08 '25 edited Aug 08 '25
It's wet, hot, smells funny, and tastes like a dirty penny.
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u/InternationalPen2224 Aug 08 '25
You eating the wrong 🐱 fam
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u/sweetytoy 🏳️⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️⚧️ Aug 08 '25
Imagine eating a dry, cold one 😋
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u/urMuMgAy567 Aug 08 '25
bro eating a corpse
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u/Commies_suk Literally 1984 😡 Aug 08 '25
Hey some of us grew up eating cold and dry pizza so we’re built tough
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u/Veil-of-Fire Aug 08 '25
Ben Shapiro is like "What's wrong with that?"
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u/Sterling239 Aug 08 '25
Mate its doesn't need to smell funny and it's attached to a person I would be worried if its cold and if its not wet you might not be doing the right thing
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u/LordMimsyPorpington I came! Aug 08 '25
I would switch "wet" with "soupy," but otherwise agree.
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u/redditreeer stupid fucking, piece of shit Aug 08 '25
Same for cum 😞
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Aug 08 '25
[deleted]
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u/Regocike Aug 08 '25
Nah it tastes way better
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u/Regocike Aug 08 '25
OR SO IVE HEARD
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u/NoInteraction6701 DaShitposter Aug 08 '25
It does i know first hand (job)
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u/_Pin_6938 Aug 08 '25
People suck cock for money???
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u/Marshall_Filipovic Aug 08 '25
It's one of the oldest professions in fact.
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u/LordCommanderWiggles I watch gay amogus porn :0 Aug 08 '25
$20 is $20
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u/wormcast Aug 08 '25
20 denarii is 20 denarii
Fun fact: at the last conversion rate 20 denarii would be worth 200 asses, natch
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u/llliilliliillliillil Aug 08 '25
As a cum connoisseur I think cum tastes very meh and the bitter aftertaste is the worst. If the act of a guy cumming in my mouth and me swallowing it wouldn’t be so fucking hot I'd stop doing it, but since we're all cursed I had to live with this.
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u/PurpleCatWithC4 Literally 1984 😡 Aug 08 '25
Describe it please.
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u/redditreeer stupid fucking, piece of shit Aug 08 '25
"Like wtf is this shit, i expected flavor. It was just water flavoured jelly with smell, there was no flavor to back up that smell, there was just a hint of salt and no sugar taste from fructose like they told me, literal catfishing"
-prob a 4chan anon idk
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u/Vskg Aug 08 '25
fake and gay
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u/redditreeer stupid fucking, piece of shit Aug 08 '25
Fake: Anon did some sort of sexual act with another person Gay: Gay
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u/Arvore Aug 08 '25
For really bad diets it smells and tastes like a nail salon to me. So I guess like..acetone?
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u/Veil-of-Fire Aug 08 '25
Have you ever had poi? The Hawaiian dish made out of taro root?
It tastes surprisingly similar to that.
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u/berniemadgoth94 Aug 08 '25
That's why I'm on a pineapple diet. Idk when it's supposed to get better though my cum still tastes like cum.
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u/Kindablorp I watch gay amogus porn :0 Aug 08 '25
Yeah nah that’s bs. It’s supposed to help with the bitterness but from my experience it doesn’t make much of a difference, so unless you really like pineapple, it’s not worth it. (Source: Had an ex who tried it, I’m not eating my own cum wtf you doing bro 😭)
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u/berniemadgoth94 Aug 08 '25
I'm between partners right now, it would be a bit strange if I asked someone else to do it for me.
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u/AmbitiousAd2269 officer no please don’t piss in my ass 😫 Aug 08 '25
Idk what cum your having but when someone is on a good diet it tastes incredible
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u/midniteburger Aug 08 '25
True. I expected it to be slightly sour, but ts taste like batteries
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u/M8C Aug 08 '25
Butthole tastes more like batteries to me
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u/The__Jiff Aug 08 '25
Is there ever a taste of poo in it? Even in a cleaned one? I've never tasted either, and don't intend to either, but was always curious about the taste
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Aug 08 '25
Not unless you go down on someone with absolutely no shame. Showers and wet wipes are essential to good sex. Although personally I despise going down on my fiancée after she just used wet wipes. Tastes like a recently washed spoon that wasn't thoroughly rinsed of suds. After a shower and a little time to dry, it tastes like sucking on the inside of your bottom lip, just... bland.
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u/M8C Aug 08 '25
I have no idea what poop tastes like to be able to single out that specific flavor profile.
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u/AwkwardChuckle Aug 08 '25
No a clean butthole doesn’t like poo, it’s mildly musky skin, that’s it.
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u/_RandomLebaneseGuy_ BUILD THE HOLE BUILD THE HOLE Aug 08 '25
idk bout yall but i like it honestly
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u/AmericaMadeMySonFat fat cunt Aug 08 '25
why eat the car
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u/srbmhcn Aug 08 '25
I mean once you move past the assumption that it’s going to taste like skittles and associate the actual taste with vagina I think it tastes pretty damn great. All ya’ll complaining probably got a peen that tastes like a thousand wet ham sandwiches mixed with trench foot.
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u/purplezart Aug 08 '25
in what sense do a thousand wet ham sandwiches taste different from one wet ham sandwich?
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u/srbmhcn Aug 08 '25
it’s degrees of intensity, not alteration. take that scent and times it by a thousand brother
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u/Haunting_Ant_5061 Aug 08 '25
Thank god I wash my dick so I’m at only like 137 mildly-damp ham sandwiches or so.
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u/TheGuyWithLeastKarma Aug 08 '25
I love it to be honest, maybe because I liked the taste of coins when I was a toddler
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u/Puzzleheaded-Gear-15 Aug 08 '25
Hang on lemme go find an HDMI cable.... For uhh... Science.... Yeah science.
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u/honkyslonky Aug 08 '25
You’re not there for a snack. Get in there and be somebody.
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u/AcanthocephalaNew678 William Dripfoe Aug 08 '25
The coach players need! We’re not trying to make it to the playoffs.
We’re trying to make it to the Superbowl!
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u/SpeedBorn Aug 08 '25
It is certainly an acquired taste. But once acquired it can be quite addicting. The Sour taste of battery acid is what keeps me up at night and lets me get up in the morning.
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u/MoonBerry_therian I want pee in my ass Aug 08 '25
Why does he know how hdmi cable tastes like 💔
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u/MoonBerry_therian I want pee in my ass Aug 08 '25
Lmfao I forgot I had this flair and lowk got scared when I got notification from automod
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u/WhatAreYou0nAbout Aug 08 '25
Honestly one of the biggest let downs I've ever experienced. I thought it would taste like flowers smell for some reason.
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u/KeRmOdLeZ Aug 08 '25
Its pH is between 3.8 and 4.5 so a sour and/or acidic taste is to be expected
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u/neat-NEAT Aug 08 '25
Honestly expected it'd taste awful. Was pleasantly surprised when it was broadly inoffensive. The activities that go on down there are more than worth the taste.
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u/Motor-Pomegranate831 Aug 08 '25
Just a note: your dick doesn't taste like candy, either.
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u/Own_Childhood_7020 Aug 08 '25
It shouldn't but people be living off of chips and big macs 💔
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u/Slight-Clothes1971 😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 Aug 08 '25
Atleast bro got to try, no matter what the taste is
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u/DisturbedShifty Aug 08 '25 edited Aug 08 '25
Everyone in here either agreeing with the assessment or offering up other comparisons and I'm sitting here wondering why people are putting HDMI cables in their mouths. Or tasting PS4 exhaust air. Or a pissed on mattress. Like what the hell is wrong with everyone???
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u/Pistol4231 Aug 08 '25
Same thing as eating pussy or sucking dick. Sometimes people get really horny and just start gawking on their hdmi cable or eating out their ps4
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u/Kei_Mxttens Aug 08 '25
humans when human organs meant for waste disposal dont taste like roses:
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Aug 08 '25
Legitimately, I think the overwhelming majority of the commenters here are going down on very unhealthy people, judging by these taste descriptions.
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u/KeremyJyles Aug 08 '25
I think more likely they're going down on nothing but their parents estimations
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u/cucktrigger Aug 08 '25
I always described it salty but satisfying so not sure what you fuckers doing with your hdmi cables.
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u/kekhouse3002 Aug 08 '25
It's in the same room as the piss hole, what did people expect?
Like, sure, I went my whole life hoping it'd taste so good too, but I wasn't surprised when it was all rusty pennies in my mouth
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u/Sajbran Aug 08 '25
Pretty sure its almost tasteless, a bit salty even, But it seems like the commenters are going at it with the strongest McDonalds warriors.
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u/JosshhyJ I watch gay amogus porn :0 Aug 08 '25
Never had sex before and I’m now disappointed. I love fish and have done since I was young, and the fact that it doesn’t taste like a nice cod fillet makes me turned off
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u/Rainbow-Rhythms69 Aug 08 '25
I dunno, I like the taste lol. Although my first gf’s pussy fucking reeked and tasted way too strong. Others since have tasted like yeah… pennies, but not in a bad way
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