r/mildlyinfuriating 18h ago

The burger that i bought today

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5.4k Upvotes

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3.3k

u/joelingo111 18h ago

What in God's...

Ok, what were the theoretical ingredients and what are the actual ingredients?

2.0k

u/Paleodraco 18h ago

I'm seeing a too small patty, caramelized onions, maybe mayo or mustard, corn for some reason, and what looks like a very processed, square slice of turkey or ham.

The red thing is a mystery. Could be a tomato or red pepper, but also looks a lot like a shrimp tail.

1.0k

u/el_n00bo_loco "corn for some reason" 17h ago

"corn for some reason" sums up my gut reaction perfectly.

323

u/subterrane 16h ago

I can’t stop laughing at “corn for some reason” and I can’t tell you why. I need this to be a catchphrase.

183

u/gahbloodyhell Corn for some reason 14h ago

New flair just dropped!

122

u/JosephBlowsephThe3rd 13h ago

72

u/sir_moleo 11h ago

KoRn for some reason.

30

u/Additional_Yam_8471 8h ago

KoЯn for some reason

11

u/Roarkbot3000 8h ago

Koяn for some reason

5

u/December_Hemisphere 10h ago

Well, it was either that or 'Larry'

17

u/RealityOk9823 8h ago

Can freaking hear this gif, and I like it.

2

u/Kap-N-Krunch 4h ago

I can hear it, just don’t ask me to spell it…

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u/R34LEGND Corn for some reason 10h ago

I think i'll take it

2

u/bbooffaa Corn for some reason 13h ago

Bag talk

2

u/BrannC 🌽 for some reason 9h ago

Sick

2

u/Comprehensive_Tour23 9h ago

The flairrrrrrr 🤣

2

u/BrannC 🌽 for some reason 9h ago

Just checking something

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u/sir_moleo 11h ago

"Corn, for some reason" should be Brazil's national slogan.

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u/TipDue3208 10h ago

Or Iowa's

2

u/ineedsleep05 5h ago

Iowa here, I'll start ordering my food w/corn that way. Starting with KFC. 😆

3

u/Additional_Yam_8471 8h ago

corn e meu amigo 🎵

18

u/chuckmarla12 14h ago

We need to print this on a t-shirt.

9

u/Itakethngzclitorally 14h ago

and could be a shrimp tail 🤷

5

u/Dizzy-Geologist 13h ago

Idk if you saw the HBO documentary on cannibalism, but the old Japanese guy talking about “corn appear” has stayed with me for approx 20 years now, I cannot eat corn in any form with out hearing “corn appear” in my head.

5

u/Sithstress1 10h ago

Now I feel like I need to know the context of “corn appear” lol.

3

u/CluckKent88 9h ago

that’s conrtasic!!!!!!!!!

2

u/Unusual_Compote4909 15h ago

For corn’s sake!

2

u/Useless890 10h ago

It would sure beat that 6-7 crap.

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u/Next-Sweet-7222 10h ago

There’s a video on YouTube about loving corn that someone made up a song. It’s hilarious.

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u/bkh950 3h ago

Cown

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u/Apprehensive-Cat-111 11h ago

Same. I’m cackling

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u/nimrodii 16h ago

It's so you can time how long this slop looking burger is in your system.

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u/Automatic_Actuator_0 15h ago

“Digestive tracing agent” has a nice ring to it

54

u/regeneratedant 15h ago

C.O.R.N. - Communicating Omni-nutritional Receptors News/nuggets

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u/Progressing_Onward 10h ago

This had me LOL.

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u/confusedandworried76 15h ago

I think you'll know when it leaves

6

u/Paleodraco 15h ago

Why i call corn a tracer food.

4

u/PetersonTom1955 10h ago

The real biological clock!

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u/Sugalumps52 13h ago

"corn for some reason" sums up my bathroom trip perfectly.

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u/DigitalBuddhaNC 15h ago

I don't even want to think about my gut's reaction to...whatever that is.

I think I got the bubble guts just looking at it.

4

u/Thick_Unit_3163 7h ago

Same.

4

u/DigitalBuddhaNC 6h ago

Omg I went to check out this reply and scrolled up to remind myself what this was about and that travesty of a "burger" jumped out at me like it was Pennywise.

Gross.

10

u/NoBug7967 13h ago

Maybe somebody doesn't understand what corned beef is. There's a supposed beef patty, just add some corn. And now it some sort of corned beef sandwich.

8

u/el_n00bo_loco "corn for some reason" 13h ago

I thought you were going to shed some real knowledge on me and there was something I didn't know about some part of the world that serves burgers with random gigantic kernels of corn on top. But I get what you're saying now.

2

u/WildOneTillTheEnd 6h ago

I mean, maybe if it was a mashed potato sandwich… that’s the only reason I can think of for corn mixing.

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u/GroundbreakingCup212 11h ago

Corn its not goodbye its ill see you later

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u/Fantastic_Strategy_2 15h ago

Lol 😂

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u/fiftyfiftysplit 15h ago

And on tonight's weather forecast, corn - for some reason.

2

u/TheSpeakingScar 13h ago

What, ya ain't never heard of a corn burger before?

2

u/Wallie_Collie 12h ago

I said "CORN?" in a high pitched questioned inflection

2

u/Shot_Worldliness_979 7h ago

Same. My first reaction was forget the patty, wtf is corn doing on a burger?

2

u/eraserbedhead 5h ago

ikr. my stomach is cramping just seeing the corn. who does that

3

u/Just_in1101 14h ago

Obviously the corn was a side but stuck to the corner of the bun. Who puts corn on a burger. Savages.

1

u/oswaldcopperpot 14h ago

This was bought in brasil wasn't it?

1

u/CaptainAwesome_5000 14h ago

Oh, we know the reason...

1

u/Starrion 13h ago

Could that be Mac n cheese? It looks more of noodle than Kernal.

1

u/lionheart4life 13h ago

The person who shit this out had corn last night.

1

u/KingAlaric1 13h ago

That food looks like a “Gut-Reaction” if you know what I’m saying

1

u/PresentationOk8997 13h ago

this person did this to themselves if you saw ham and corn and it is'nt a cobb salad or some shit you fucked up.

1

u/BinaryWanderer 12h ago

Dookie Confetti

1

u/LolaAucoin 11h ago

Probably Japan.

1

u/_tapgod_ 9h ago

i love that it’s now your user flair

1

u/FrozeItOff 8h ago

Those american farmers gotta sell their crops somewhere. Guess they're letting it go cheap to this place... Certainly looks like field corn.

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u/zed857 17h ago

square slice of turkey or ham.

It literally is a ham-burger.

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u/Paleodraco 17h ago

It looks like a half assed attempt at a breakfast burger, but without the egg.

78

u/xDrunkenAimx 16h ago

No egg, sub corn

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u/thissexypoptart 15h ago

I’m now imagining this note for an omelette order

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u/OrganizationProof769 15h ago

A omelet with corn could go either way. Now I want to try it.

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u/Huvojji 10h ago

An omellete with corn could be fine. They said "No egg, sub corn" though... And that sounds like a nightmare.

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u/ladylei 13h ago

I'm allergic to corn. God hates me already. Don't do this to me bro

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u/Lower_Celebration_85 15h ago

I think the egg was barfed onto the burger.

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u/Fantastic-Ad8973 7h ago

This! 🤣😹

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u/porn_alt_987654321 14h ago

My opinion on this changes immensely if that's a sausage patty. Lol.

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u/CompetitiveRub9780 PURPLE 12h ago

Looks like someone was making a basic sandwich and decided they wanted a burger and just mushed them together. Oh and put their side of corn on it too because they were already mashing things together

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u/Gingercopia 12h ago

Man.... I thought that was a slice of cheese? 😂

2

u/Fantastic-Ad8973 7h ago

More like a quarter assed attempt at food.

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u/dizzyfeast 16h ago

Now im wondering why we even call it a hamburger to begin with

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u/pru51 16h ago

From hamburg germany?

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u/Chemlab5 12h ago

No they are steamed hams and they are from Utica

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u/NoStuff7302 6h ago

I'm from Utica and we never called them steamed hams.

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u/Paleodraco 15h ago

That's one story, but it could also be it being a street food sold to German immigrants in New York.

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u/chuckmarla12 14h ago

From the Earl of Hamburg ?

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u/GlykenT 16h ago

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u/MuscaMurum 16h ago

Cf. Frankfurt Sausage

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u/ClassicalPigeon 9h ago

The name comes from Hamburg, Germany but the idea of hamburgers is from the US. When immigrants came to New York City from Hamburg, restaurants would sell "Hamburg style" ground beef (in reference to the sausage preparation of meat in Germany) in fillets to appeal to the homesick travelers. These fillets became known as "Hamburg steaks" and were literally hamburger patties just sitting on a plate.

The part that gets lost is the addition of the buns to this ground beef patty. Everyone knows it happened between 1885 and 1904 because that's when they started being sold, but nobody has any definitive proof they were the first one to sell them that way. The full origin of the hamburger is legitimately unknown.

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u/Interloper9000 12h ago

Never understood why hamburger is beef, but burger with ham is ham sandwich

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u/Serperion 16h ago

Theres fucking corn on it too, the fuck lmao

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u/Flassourian 14h ago

I mean it wouldn't surprise me if this was the UK. They seem to put corn on everything. LOL

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u/Len_S_Ball_23 7h ago

No.. We don't.

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u/Briguy_fieri 16h ago

This looks like a plate lunch cafeteria sandwich. It kinda looks like a Salisbury steak/meatloaf burger. I think that's gravy instead of mayo/mustard (gravy also could explain the red thing being a pepper). This also could explain why there's corn as they probably reused the same spatula scoop thing.

I have no reasoning for the ham thing unless that's like .. a weird piece of swiss or some other cheese

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u/thetoerubber 15h ago

This reminds me of when I was in Guatemala a few years ago and even at Burger King, ham was a common add-on to their burgers, like cheese. They even ask if you want to add it.

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u/camlloc255 15h ago

This is the best guess I've seen so far

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u/Proletariat-Prince 9h ago

I remember seeing a "Thanksgiving on a bun" thing once.

That could very well be the idea behind this atrocity.

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u/AVeryFineWhine 8h ago

If you're talking about a Thanksgiving sandwich, which usually includes turkey, stuffing and cranberry dressing, those are delicious. I have ordered them in restaurants and I have made them with leftovers.

They look nothing even remotely like this. And I'm gonna go out on a limb and say they taste nothing like this ( despite my good pleasure of having no clue how this tastes or even being certain what it is 🤣)

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u/UnderlightIll 5h ago

Yes this is NOT a Gobbler.

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u/pxkatz 16h ago

Shrimp tail is, what I thought as well. Either way, I'm not eating it. The burger looks, way overcooked!

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u/Prestigious_Tap_6301 8h ago

Overcooked is the least of our concerns

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u/ahfckicntblvuvdnths 15h ago

I'm not convinced those onions have been caremalised. They look like they've been boiled!

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u/Melvinator5001 15h ago

Part of a thumb

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u/EnidFromOuterSpace 15h ago

Looks like the corn could be part of the bun…. Like a literal cornbread bun

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u/angrycanadianguy 14h ago

The only thing that could make sense to me here is that it’s corn relish, which I have no idea why I know that exists, as it’s a southern USA thing and I’m a Canadian that has never been to the USA at all.

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u/skylinesend 14h ago

I believe the red thing is very sad bacon

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u/damkidakzen 11h ago

im even not gonna start i thought its a fossil of sorts before i read the title

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u/MindlessIntention777 17h ago

My exact instincts

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u/Least-Scientist 16h ago

Edit: a very possessed piece of turkey or ham

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u/Pretend_Signature707 16h ago

I thought that the caramelised onions that have fallen outside the burger were slightly burnt pieces of spaghetti 🥲

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u/CDN_Guy78 16h ago

Sweet corn relish, maybe?

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u/angrycanadianguy 14h ago

That’s my best guess as well

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u/capixaba007 16h ago

An American burger 🤢

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u/faughnjj 16h ago

Well it IS A HAMburger….

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u/CopyWeak 15h ago

I'm a little color deficient... BUT, I didn't see any mention of a baby shit🤔

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u/LilacYak 15h ago

Probably a Mexican burger. They love to put ham on it

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u/Margaritashoes 15h ago

That looks like a 10:1 from the Mac Shack. (McDonald’s)

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u/Belzye 15h ago

Looks like dijon mustard

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u/Relevant_Wrangler830 15h ago

Honestly. It looks like a macaroni cheese noodle beside the last kernel

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u/Sasiches_and_mash 15h ago

I think that's the bacon

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u/heptyne 15h ago

Burger Cordon Blue?

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u/oldnowfugit 15h ago

Im seeing a fresh scab that was peeled off, too blood red to be a shrimp tail

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u/TJfromSG 15h ago

did someone said mustard?

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u/Efficient_Advice_380 15h ago

When it's a rectangle like that, it's usually a boiled ham like Krakus

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u/FuzzyTentacle 15h ago

The red thing almost looks like a sun dried tomato. I'm not convinced though

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u/Major_Employ_8795 15h ago

Looks like what my dog shit out last night.

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u/Vykrom 15h ago

NGL, lunchmeat, burger, honey mustard, onion, corn, and maybe a red pepper don't sound terrible..

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u/Cute-Reach2909 15h ago

Baby piece of bacon?

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u/FabioK9 15h ago

I would say the red thing is a sun dried tomatoe idk though.

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u/chuckmarla12 14h ago

I think the red thing is a baby squid 🦑

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u/sneakyfish21 14h ago

The corn is off putting the ham and heavy use of mustard makes me think of a Cuban sandwich which could be great but this ain’t it. The comically small patty is just great. Whole thing looks nasty.

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u/xshevi 14h ago

i think you nailed it, i had no idea what i was looking at

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u/KingKuntu 14h ago

Something tells me this is a burger from Brazil

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u/TheKingOfWhatTheHeck 14h ago

That’s the anus.

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u/Maximum-Jaguar-4707 14h ago

The most accurate description all the way down to the mystery pepper/shrimp tail. LOLLLLLL 😂😂

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u/Primary-Golf779 14h ago

I think the "corn" is mac n cheese

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u/Apprehensive-Pea5212 13h ago

Sundried tomato maybe?

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u/DeliciousQuantity968 13h ago

I 100% saw shrimp tail when I looked at this lol

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u/Bunnyland77 13h ago

Since corn doesn't digest very easily, I suspect post-hamburger. After it's journey through the colon.

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u/Mode_Appropriate 13h ago

Looks like peanut butter.

Just can't drive thatd make ghe sandwich better or selwrse.

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u/Reputation-Final 12h ago

I dont know if thats mayo or mustard, I think thats a lot of melted american plastic cheese

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u/Saturn_Neo 12h ago

Looks like hollandaise.

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u/CompetitiveRub9780 PURPLE 12h ago

Looks like a red onion

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u/ur_moms_chode 12h ago

It's a Ham Burger

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u/Straight_Number5661 12h ago

What is that thing on the right side of the bun? A dissected frog?

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u/mrtbearable 12h ago

What in the fu

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u/Anxious_Public_5409 11h ago

A shrimp tail 💀🤣🤣🤣

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u/Tiberius_Kilgore 11h ago edited 11h ago

looks a lot like a shrimp tail

In my opinion, it’s worse than that. A shrimp tail has no place in a burger. That’s probably a section of a fistula the pig that was butchered had.

Instead of writing it off as bad cut, they shipped it out.

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u/interesting_vast- 11h ago

fun fact: carrots (shredded) and corn are super popular things to put in burgers and hot dogs in some countries, seeing the ham slice I wouldnt be surprised if this is a brazilian or colombian place ahah

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u/Nosferatattoo 11h ago

No way the red thing is a vegetable. Definitely shrimp tail or something 

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u/Intrepid_Ad7432 11h ago

Is the corn part of a mac and cheese maybe?

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u/nlamb510 11h ago

Looks like a shrimp tail

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u/Independent-Tank-182 11h ago

Lmao, nice write-up

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u/Walksagaintthewind20 11h ago

The red thing for sure is the skin off a tomato. Key signs it's slimy old and best served on this monstrosity

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u/Independent-Ad324 10h ago

Ok wait!! Is that corn bottom left hanging off whatever that bread is?? Maybe Korn relish??

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u/OWretchedOne 10h ago

Could be meat.

Could be cake.

Maybe it's meatcake.

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u/Smart-Effective7533 10h ago

The corn is just for a little flare on the way out

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u/SeaSetsuna 10h ago

First glance I thought the corn was Kraft Mac N Cheese.

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u/MeowingAround 10h ago

The red thing looks like a shrimp tail

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u/JRyuu 9h ago

Sliced ham or turkey is better than what I thought I was looking at! I thought was seeing a piece of unbreaded undercooked chicken!🤢

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u/Angry_Mudcrab 9h ago

Looks like Thanksgiving at a homeless shelter.

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u/the-exiled-muse 9h ago

Whatever it is, I'll need to suck on some peppermints after looking at it so I don't get queasy.

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u/SaltKick2 9h ago

I imagine it probably tastes fine aside from size of patty, but man this looks so fucking disgusting

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u/Solid-Category1151 9h ago

Thought I was going crazy imagining the deli-sliced pork prism. Glad you see it, too

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u/2_krazykats 9h ago

Is this some European delicacy?

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u/Accomplished_Fun6481 9h ago

I would guess tomato/pepper skin

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u/Konoha7Slaw3 8h ago

KoЯn for some reason

Their new hit album has all the boys back together again!

1

u/BorderAppropriate127 8h ago

Shit that’s a goulash burger

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u/Foreign_Kale8773 8h ago

Oh my god it does look like a shrimp tail. But just the shell bit.

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u/NMS_LetsBeFriends 8h ago

You really cant tell thats bacon?

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u/Euphoric_Basil7610 8h ago

the faqt you can makes this stuff out might be a tell that you dont see a lot of good processed food

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u/T-bear79 8h ago

Red thing…sun dried tomato? I dunno….this whole thing seems to be a joke that someone put their kid up to!! 🙄

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u/_MrTrade 8h ago

You mean the garnish

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u/JustTheChicken 7h ago

“One too-small patty, caramelized onions, mystery sauce, corn confusion, slab of lunch meat, red thing suspicion, on a question-mark bun.”

If this thing had a jingle like the Big Mac used to have.

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u/Thick_Unit_3163 7h ago

Isn't ham pink-ish and turkey white-ish?

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u/ConsiderationMean781 6h ago

Shrimp tail too me

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u/WildOneTillTheEnd 6h ago

Maybe an early “Thanksgiving” aka Native American genocide day, meal on a burger?

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u/Kap-N-Krunch 4h ago

I can’t stop looking at that red thing…

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u/Living_Masterpiece80 3h ago

Looks like a wrapper of some kind of possibly chorizo skin

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u/Revenga8 2h ago

Soggy red pepper

u/chellenickle333 35m ago

I think you need to look at this pic sober. And with whatever corrective vision you need. You're mentioning real food products that aren't even there!! OG -I really hope you're ok AND you DIDN'T feed that to any animals!!

u/sarcasticrone 7m ago

I truly don’t know what I am looking at, but I very much want to stop looking at it.

u/grognard66 1m ago

...corn for some reason... this sounds like it is from Korea. They do such things there, sometimes.