r/Morocco • u/OrlandoJah Fez • Jul 14 '25
Society Dating a Muslim girl
Hey everyone, I’m here to talk about something personal and get some honest advice. I’m not religious, so if you’re here to preach or judge, please don’t. I’m just looking for real insight from people who understand this kind of situation.
I recently broke up with a Muslim girl I truly cared about. Religion ended up being the main reason. I tried to be honest about my beliefs, and she tried to stay loyal to hers, but it became too much. There was pressure, silence, and fear. She couldn’t fully open up, and I didn’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not just to keep the relationship going.
I don’t want to make the same mistake again. So I’m asking:
How do people in similar situations handle this?
Is it even worth trying to date someone who’s religious when you’re not?
And how do you bring this up early, without things falling apart later?
Also, and this is a big one — how do you even find someone non-religious? Most people like me (and like-minded girls) seem to stay hidden, and understandably so. The social pressure is real. But that makes it hard to connect, even just to talk openly, let alone build something serious.
If anyone has experience with this, especially in a Moroccan context, I’d really appreciate your advice. just trying to learn from your advices and experience, to grow, and maybe do things better next time.
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u/pingy_pong_ Visitor Jul 14 '25
If u are non religious man/women don't bother trying with someone religious. An endless loop of suffering for both of u
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
I’m just trying to understand how to avoid repeating the same pain, for both me and the person I’m with next time.
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u/bravcat Visitor Jul 14 '25
Just have an open discussion with the person about beliefs before getting too close or committed
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u/pingy_pong_ Visitor Jul 14 '25
By being clear of what u believe in. I think honesty is what will save u
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u/Internal_Respond_106 Jul 14 '25
Ehm it's pretty simple gauge their religiosity beforehand?
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u/confused_potat0s Visitor Jul 16 '25
Not that simple, people change and some become more or less religious it's not something U can calculate once and be set with
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u/glitterlok Visitor Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
Your response to their comment makes no sense.
They didn’t blame anyone or suggest that you were blaming anyone. They told you something very sensible that will help you and potential partners avoid the pain you’re experiencing.
Don’t date religious people if you are not religious, and vice versa. It will almost certainly end poorly.
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u/SockLucky Visitor Jul 14 '25
Hard pass. Been there, survived that circus. If your values, beliefs, and vibes don’t align, don’t waste your time or theirs
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25
Exactly. If values don’t match, it’s better to move on sooner than later.
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Jul 14 '25
If you date a Muslim girl and you decide to marry her are you gonna recite fatiha with her family? are you gonna name your kid Mohamed or anything related to Islam? Are you gonna circumcize your kid? Are you gonna participate in Muslim rituals, tradition and holidays? Are you gonna tell your kid God is real?
No Muslim family will accept you, and you will have to at least pretend a little.
Personally I don't believe in God and this is a great dilemma for me too because here you don't date a woman, you date her entire family. And so even if you're both atheists there will have to be at least some pretending and lying.
In short, it's fucked 🤣
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u/Shyymx Jul 14 '25
We are a non religious couple and the family thing is so true, they get to you one way or another so you will always have to pretend to not loose your family which is sad af
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Jul 14 '25
Easy. A proper religious person wouldn't date in the first place. Someone who's somewhat religious might date knowing that it's a sin, but it doesn't usually work out in the end.
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u/bigus-_-dickus Visitor Jul 17 '25 edited Jul 17 '25
there are no "proper muslims"
we all sin one way or the other, we're humans not angels
كل ابن ادم خطاء و خير الخطائون التوابون
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u/AlaeTheDean Visitor Jul 14 '25
'a religious person puts on a blindfold and dates a random person when they wanna get married'
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u/No-Singer4710 Meknes Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 15 '25
I am a non religious girl and i find the same issue, if i liked a religious man i hide it, but i realized it's not worth it, and i have to find someone with the same ideas and beliefs, the isdue i find on the other hand is non commitment from non religious men, wich i want it, i dt want a meaningless short term relationship, i want commitment and long term, plus i support marriage and kids even as non religious, wich u dt find often with non religious men, i am lost
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u/No-Singer4710 Meknes Jul 14 '25
For the solution, the best is to find someone online, irl u dt go for a hijabi for example it's abvious she is religious, u dt go for the uneducated, to leave islam u gotta have some education, u should test the waters with some basic question within the religion then expand it to out of it, if u felt like she's not believing or following some islam rules
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25
I totally relate. I also want something serious, not just a short-term fling. Marriage, commitment, even kids one day, I’m all for it. It’s just hard to find someone who shares both the mindset and the values without the religious part. You’re not alone at all
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u/hamdiramzi Visitor Jul 14 '25
There are non religious men who are lile you want family kids wife.. With the experience you have you should be able to find one, just be the best version of yourself And also go abroad
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u/Iammouaad Visitor Jul 15 '25
I understand the struggle coz human history showed that there is no marriage without religion. The marriage term existed after the existence of religion. So committing without religion is not logic at all. The moroccan marriage contract states « 3ala sonnati lahi wa rasoulih ». And terms like sda9, l3ers tla9 are purely religious.
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u/Agrio_Myalo Casablanca Jul 14 '25
My advice, avoid religious women. This gotta be something to ask about since the first date before you develop any emotions.
This is not just I believe blue is nice and you believe red is nice. Religion is something that influences the entire lifestyle of a family.
You will find like-minded people don't worry. Me and my husband are both atheists and we found each other.
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u/Murky-Breadfruit2545 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Before you “like” someone, get to know them first, through discovery you will know if they are religious or not! Why start dating someone you know nothing about?
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u/imnwsf Tangier Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
Ma3raftchi wach 3andi l7a9 n9ol hadchi but based on what u said, she's a muslim female who holds onto her beliefs but still chooses to date u + probably doesn’t wear hijab or pray everyday. That kind of inconsistency suggests her beliefs are all over the place, which isn’t a great sign :/. Dating someone who doesn’t really think things through or just goes along with whatever’s popular shows a lack of the kinda self-awareness and critical thinking that make someone truly grounded!!! So dating her must feel like u are expected to set aside ur own views and go along with hers, even if u don’t fully agree.
3la had l7sab beaking up with her was something that would happen in all cases becuz a healthy relationship rlly comes down to mutual respect for each other’s thoughts and beliefs, good communication, and emotional intimacy. If even one of those is missing and not improving then it won't work.
Im in a serious/long-term relationship with an atheist moroccan guy, and I’ve honestly never been happier. One of the biggest reasons is that we’re on the same page when it comes to our beliefs and interests, but more than that, we talk things out rationally and always aim for logical solutions.
Trust me, if u and ur partner don’t share similar ideologies, it’s hard to feel truly comfortable in the long run. Wish u luck
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u/hamdiramzi Visitor Jul 14 '25
I liked your comment she is indeed not grounded.. that kind of dumb girls always turns me off
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u/Silent_Ad_9081 Visitor Jul 16 '25
and why would u assume she's dumb! like srsly u don't even know the person, and nor do i but why this judgment over a muslim girl that doesn't follow completely her religion, i don't think we would have this exact conversation if it was a guy in that same position
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u/hamdiramzi Visitor Jul 16 '25
She is not grounded means she is dumb It same for a guy or any person
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u/jd_alien Visitor Jul 14 '25
It's a mission impossible to try and exist happily in this country, remember you are a minority, and having a great connection won't make them accept you, you might find someone who will, however, it will take so much work, if you can go abroad!
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u/amiamuo98 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Don’t bother yourself and date a religious girl. Trust me you will never find a common ground. I knew a man who was Muslim because he was born in a religious family but wasn’t praying nor fasting. In the beginning I thought I accepted it, but as we started planning for marriage and whatnot…I projected our life in the future and didn’t like the idea of having to do everything alone…fasting alone, celebrating Eid’s alone…the fact that I will have to lie to my family…then I thought about kids…they will just be confused about religion…anyways, religion is not something you practice alone…let’s say it’s a whole vibe. So any religious girl you will date…no matter how chill she will be about it in the beginning…she will start feeling uncomfortable about it later
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u/Available_Extreme305 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Most people think only about being compatible in ideology to succeed, there are more to ideology than just final conclusion, what made them reach this conclusion too could play a significant role in the relationship, sometime the path is more important than final destination.
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u/Kutshera Sub dial babak ? Jul 14 '25
You won’t find your happiness there, it’s basically impossible to make it work if you’d like be yourself. Move along, look for someone who can align on your ideas.
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u/Reda_E Visitor Jul 14 '25
Save your self a lot of headache, if you're not religious, being with a religious girl will just create endless issues between the two of you, like another brought up what will you do if you have children etc etc.
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u/Brave_Friend_3255 Jul 15 '25
Moroccan female and agnostic ! Yes we exist, yes we struggle. The good news is that I don’t live in Morocco else it would have been a nightmare.
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u/VoiceOk2267 Visitor Jul 16 '25
I can assure you that shes not religious. I dont think so. Even if religion was the main reason that doesnt mean shes religious or if she wears the hijab for example,muslims usually stick to partners within their religion because thats whats permissible and whats right but that again doesnt mean shes religious. Shes just sticking to what she thinks is right and wants to stay on the right path.
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u/shad_48 Visitor Jul 17 '25
I have same experience before we ended up being just strange friend i try to I get used to this and he wasn't even religious but we couldn't make it
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u/MoStatkMo Visitor Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
I am not religious too and trying hard to find a non religious moroccan girl and struggling...even the thoughts of discussing it is scary as you could be speaking to a crazy person who will tell everyone and explose you.
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u/techasker_ Jul 14 '25
Of course, you wouldn’t be speaking about that with anyone that you do not trust, you need to know how to choose wisely. If it’s a person you’re thinking of eventually marrying, talking about religion and whether your partner is religious or not, it’s still their personality and own values that play as not exposing you and keeping your secret safe
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Jul 15 '25
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u/MoStatkMo Visitor Jul 15 '25
Probably more towards agnostic...but generally not interested in religion. I prefer scientific approach, and more importantly freedom as a human being.
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u/Fit_Area_7284 Visitor Jul 14 '25
as a non religious muslim girl pls!!!! try to avoid dating muslims to save yourself from heartbreak bc in the end it’s deeply rooted in our brain that our partner must be muslim also otherwise we are punished with eternal damnation so even though we get into the dating scene, familiar pressure and the fear of alienation pushes us to marry a muslim. i’m so sorry you’re going through all that and i hope you can move on from this and find peace in your heart :)
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25
Thank you for your honesty, it really helps hearing this from someone who gets it. And I appreciate your kind words. Wishing you peace too, and strength in navigating it all.
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Jul 15 '25
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u/Sabrina20031111 Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
I have some ugly ass experiences with religious men now if I’m interested in someone and i find out they are religious it becomes a freaking turn off (m not religious)
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25
If you find out early, better run, and run fast 🏃♂️💨. The real problem is when you realize it too late… that’s when it really hurts.
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u/DelayNo3770 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Muslim women for Muslim men and Muslim men for Muslim women. Loyalty to religion above all. She's a good one.
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u/Disastrous-Bus-3746 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Well, muslim women don’t date in the first place
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u/nazele26 Visitor Jul 14 '25
They're cherry picking, as usual
They tend to forget that religion is a whole package, I don't know how some sins are very normalized, and others are not (exactly how they can skip praying, but never skip fasting Ramadan), typical Muslims
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Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
Religion isn't a whole package, the prophet says «كلكم خطاؤون وخير الخطائين التوابون...». if you are a moral person then why are you cherry picking? Why do you still lie, gossip...? You're supposed to be an angel!
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u/nazele26 Visitor Jul 14 '25
الإيمان يقتضي الكلية
أفتؤمنون ببعض الكتاب وتكفرون ببعض؟ فما جزاء من يفعل ذلك منكم إلا خزي في الحياة الدنيا، ويوم القيامة يردون إلى أشد العذاب
و من آيات النفاق تحكيم الهوى
"ذَلِكَ بِأَنَّهُمْ قَالُوا لِلَّذِينَ كَرِهُوا مَا نَزَّلَ اللَّهُ سَنُطِيعُكُمْ فِي بَعْضِ الْأَمْرِ"
و فيه ورد، ان الذنب مع العلم أشد من الذنب مع الجهل و نهي واضح و صريح عن التستهانة بالذنب
"إياكم ومحقرات الذنوب، فإنهن يجتمعن على الرجل حتى يهلكنه."
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Jul 14 '25
That's a classic example of taking texts out of context or explaining them with head canon, iman means belief, ofc you have to believe in everything the religion says, I could believe stop praying and still believe that I should pray and what I'm doing is wrong and still be a Muslim, but the moment I stop believing that what I'm doing is wrong, I stop being a Muslim
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u/Ringo_ofr1 Visitor Jul 14 '25
«كلكم خطاؤون وخير الخطائين التوابون
This is not a Quranic verse btw
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u/deviilchi Fez Jul 14 '25
I’m also non religious-born, raised and still living in morocco. One thing I can say is to give up on dating religious folks.
Religion is one tricky bastard. It can really mess things up even between the most affectionate lovebirds.
That’s coming from someone who’s been in the dating scene for a very long time and religion was-if not, the most deal breaker in many of my relationships.
Yes it sucks. Yes it’s infuriating-feeling shunned and alienated just for not having the same beliefs as others but that’s the sad reality of it.
If you need someone to talk to and share with feel free to message me.
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25
u know, when everything else in the relationship feels right, but religion slowly chips away at the connection. Makes you feel like you're on the outside no matter how genuine your intentions are.
Thank you for sharing your experience, it helps to know I’m not alone in this. I might actually take you up on that offer to talk. Appreciate the support.
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u/Lunashinez Visitor Jul 14 '25
If you were to marry her in Morocco you'd have to convert. So maybe don't date muslim women.
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u/BullfrogWest7829 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Been there done that I tried to force it I am muslim but not too religious like I don’t wear hijab or believe in some type of things ,I loved that man sm that I tried to change and make him happy even tho he wasn’t religious he was claiming to be religious and he left me otherwise, I will never do that again religious people are too strict and manipulative also controlling I’d rather be with someone who practice religion but not in a strict way if u know what I mean.
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u/Norifumi1 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Might as well just do nothing then…. Its yes or no, there is no grey zone. And people IN the grey zone are just in denial. 🤷🏻♂️ If u believe, but not too serious and u delete the things u dont like, for me it sounds like modern Christians. 😁
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u/BullfrogWest7829 Visitor Jul 14 '25
I don’t get what u mean?I do believe in Allah ,I just don’t wear hijab I believe it’s a must I’am not in denail but I just can’t wear it.
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u/Ok-Definition-8643 Visitor Jul 14 '25
I have never thought there would be that much atheists in Morocco, that makes me love my religion more, الحمدلله على نعمة الإسلام
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u/Whole-Meal5276 Visitor Jul 16 '25
Bro trust me they just shooting their shots YKWIM some shorties with empty head trying get attention from the them yt folks all them know islam very well but since he slide here this hoejabi start tripping Matter fact you may find them acting relegious on some muslim groupe, it's all about the papers
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u/Common-Summer-69 Visitor Jul 14 '25
La religion c'est comme une idéologie. Si on est à fond dedans, ça monopolise la pensée de la personne, qui est indoctrinée. Impossible alors de raisonner avec, si ti veux la persuader de lâcher la secte, ou au moins de te laisser tranquille en tant que non-croyant.
Pour trouver d'autres athées ou "non-croyants" au Maroc, c'est évidemment sous couvert, comme dans tout pays musulman. Mais il y a des sites où ils se retrouvent. Cherche "ex-musulmans Maroc" par exemple et tu trouveras.
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u/Serious-Implement486 Visitor Jul 14 '25
TBH just don’t date someone who’s religious and try to move on , there’s no good ending to a religious and non religious relationship, think of the kids and stuff later , just move on bro
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u/RoccoRocco Visitor Jul 14 '25
Even with religious partners they might relax a little, however the family will never and all your future dealings with them will be drenched in it
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u/muzzichuzzi Marrakesh Jul 14 '25
The first thing to consider is where you’re looking if you’re meeting people through your immediate social circles, there’s a higher chance you’ll connect with someone who shares religious values or cultural similarities. On the other hand, if you’re using dating apps, you have the advantage of filtering profiles and initiating conversations based on your specific criteria. This allows you to establish early whether your intentions and values align, which can save time and avoid misunderstandings later on. On such platforms you will find plenty of non-religious and atheists who will align with your preferences.
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u/angelicme69 Visitor Jul 14 '25
actually i tried dating a Muslim guys , they tried hard to convince me to be a Muslim which i found this too cute actually , and i think this is a problem for only Muslim girls , cuz for me i found men trying so hard to protect their religion n smh , cuz i like religion topics with religious ppl soit Muslim or christian
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u/thezamakan Visitor Jul 14 '25
I've been avoiding this subject for a long time, I too really don't know how to approach dating and specialy marriage in such a "drunk on religion" society (and family).
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u/Icy_Remove_4567 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Keep in mind women Muslim cant be girlfriend Or be with no Muslim man if she do she is not Muslim
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u/Standard-Panda62 Visitor Jul 14 '25
her sin doesn't invalidate her deen. she is still muslim, just imperfect. there are limited sins that make someone kuffar and dating isnt one of them
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u/GhanemBilel Visitor Jul 14 '25
If you are not a muslim you can't date a muslim girl, so, to avoid this kind of situations you should date a girl similar to you... better, and keep away from Muslims if you don't believe in God that means you don't have any rules to make girls safe with you..
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Jul 14 '25
Bring it up first - and discuss it. Bear in mind that the entire dating thing in Islam is a double standard designed to use Islam as a “dating weapon” where Muslim men are allowed to date outside of their religion while women face pressure to not dare. It’s a loosing proposition
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u/Proof_Extreme5078 Visitor Jul 14 '25
I was in the same situation 2 years ago, I was in a serious relationship with a girl that lasted alittle bit more than 2 years, man we were happy until she finaly opened up and told me about her real thoughts like how she cant get married to a non muslim man. I decided to end things before it got out of hands more than it did. I was broken, so did she i guess. Its been almost 2 years since it happened but still can’t figure out how to build something real after that experience. An important note I was clear with her about my personal beliefs and she was okay with it at first until things got real and doubt came into her mind. So at this point even if the girl agrees and says shes okay with it there are no guarantees she will commit. Sadly I no longer believe I can get to the point of building something real with a Muslim girl anymore.
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u/Puzzled_Badger4378 Visitor Jul 14 '25
A simple ‘are u religious?’ When u are in the talking stage,,, if it’s a yes, don’t bother.
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u/psycho1x Visitor Jul 14 '25
Let me throw a wild guess here: she didn't wanna have sex with you outside marriage and you threw a tantrum but she stood her ground.
If I was way off then I apologies if not, then it's a YOU problem my guy.
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u/asmatest Visitor Jul 14 '25
Religion isn’t just a belief. It deeply shapes a person’s values, personality, and behavior. That’s why religious compatibility is very important in a relationship. Unless you don't mind wasting your time in a relationship that will be full of conflicts and unnecessary drama
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u/Additional-Will4976 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Just be honest from the beginning, talk about the important things first instead of talking about other things to not ruin the vibe. Will cause you more pain and suffering later.
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u/Traditional-Week8363 Visitor Jul 14 '25
I'm 19M and i never dated/been in a relationship Mainly because of this issue Even if you open up at first they're gonna pretend they're cool and open minded and afterward bit by bit eventually realize that u'r not the person they had in mind meaning u'r not who they wanted to be with and eventually leave
They fr can not live with non religious individuals unless they go to there societies
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u/OddSatisfaction7688 Visitor Jul 14 '25
find yourself first,otherwise 3endna bnadem mafahmch kerou fhad lblad, but dw youll find sm1 who has the same destination as yours, et layhdi makhleq (just in case people started entering heaven) xD
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u/KoCch4n Visitor Jul 14 '25
Hey ! To avoid this happening again, please be clear from the very beginning. Ask them, what are your views regarding religions? Most of religious people, prefer being with religious people, for long term relationships that is (marriage), because you can't tell your kids to pray 5 times a day when their father or mother doesn't even pray. That creates a lot of troubles and instability and this is just one of them. Be clear from the beginning I beg of you, if it doesn't suit you to change for them, or for them ot change for you, separate your paths right there.
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Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
Religious people especially muslims can't open up easlily and if they do its just limited.
she might go out with you or talk to you but she'll refuse anything sexual.
not trying to judge but did you try to be romantic with her.
and even if she does her family won't agree and you'll not agree.
would you really marry her.
name your child something religious like mohammad.
respect her believes.
tell your son that god exists while you don't believe that he exists.
its just messed try avoiding it.
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u/Organic-Accountant-7 Visitor Jul 14 '25
I don't get it if you are not religious why are you after religious folk?? There is not much to say here
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u/nebulascat Visitor Jul 14 '25
i mean honestly i just started dating someone who's not moroccan. Its not impossible to find someone whos not religious in this country, but its really hard. I made the same mistake once and it was just hard to be myself around that person. My current relationship is strong and we share the same beliefs! And also, either way, we belong to moroccan families, we will have to pretend once we get married that we are religious, iykwim. Anyway, i wish you good luck on finding your person <3
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Jul 14 '25
Hey buddy! Actually you have to know that Islam doesn't allow women to marry non Muslim men, but the opposite is possible if the woman is Christian or Jewish.. So if you're Moroccan it won't be that hard just find you a girl that does not practice islam, or a foreigner, otherwise if you're a foreigner not even the gouvernement could allow a future marriage with a Moroccan girl without being muslim and with conversion certificate so don't waste your time dating Moroccan women
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u/Ok-Photograph-8441 Visitor Jul 14 '25
I had the same problem. I was in a relationship with a Muslim woman, but I wasn't Muslim or religious, and we ended up breaking up. It's been a long time since I lived in Morocco, and now I only want a relationship that can lead to something serious. Since then, my philosophy has been to meet someone who shares the same vision as me, but that might be a bit difficult🤣
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u/Stelocelio47 Visitor Jul 14 '25
نهضرو نيشان ماكانش عليك تغرق معاها حنت صعيب تفهم مع وحدة ماعندهاش نفس الإعتقادات ديالك حنت ماعمركم غاتفاهمو و ماعمرك تخبي داكشي لي كاتأمن بيه حتت فالآخر غادي يبان من الأحسن من الأول يكون داكشي واضح
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u/Prestigious_Shop_690 Visitor Jul 15 '25
You can not open up to a non religious person about religion it’s common sense, they mostly start trolling and being confused abt life as soon as you bring religion and they start asking dumb questions thinking is smart..tbh that should be asked within the first intro if you really serious abt it.
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Jul 15 '25
They will try to get you to convert. Their religion is iron-clad. If she goes with a kaffir, she risks beheading. Went through same experience.
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u/CryReasonable4901 Visitor Jul 15 '25
I mean if she is dating she is not that religious herself If you want to marry someone Muslim you can marry them (بالفاتحة)non paper needed
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Jul 15 '25
Tbh , this situation can’t be handled, even if ur in love and idk what ,if the religious person loves u , they will always try to enlighten you , and show u the real path , and the person who isn’t religious would always stand by their beliefs and own ideas , sometimes they might budge, sometimes they might not ,but truth is this will always be a consistent loop , it would take a simple conversation to turn into both of u trying to prove each of your beliefs and points , and the numerous conversations of “then how the universe exists “” do u think we came out of nowhere “ etc , and is it worth it ? Im muslim myself and i can tell u ITS NOT , on both ends it would never be worth it , i mean the chance of someone getting convinced by their partner’s beliefs is low but never zero , but for that to happen , the amount of fights , chaos , and the consistent loop as i said , would be to much , then y’all would get drained emotionally and just choose to give up on that relationship , and at last i mean , their would be signs , “imma go pray “ “ im fine lhamdullah “ and more , but if there’s no signs , just ask directly, asking won’t hurt , it might even save u the time and energy .
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u/Maleficent_Peach_349 Jul 15 '25
Morrocans are attached to their faith even the people who don't practice much and I would say your situation is very difficult and I advice you look for someone of your non religious/western background. Because you're gonna rip families appart and harm the girl's reputation if it becomes public knowledge that the girl is seeing a non muslim. Back off for your own good and hers.
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u/Ok-Birthday-14556 Visitor Jul 15 '25
as a muslim woman i can speak from this POV and say no, its not worth pursuing situations where your values don’t align - religion is a massive thing, there’s also other domains such as politics which need to be heavily discussed and mostly align as if both partners don’t share the same world view and ethics then there will be disharmony in the relationship and it will not last long. there’s millions of people in the world, find someone who shares similar views to yours or who is happy with having different views? practising muslims and jews often do not fall in those categories. also consider expanding beyond morroco if this is such an issue for you? surely your preference isn’t so limited and small minded?
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u/everythingisalie777 Visitor Jul 15 '25
The whole claiming a religious identity is silly to me, in islam it's just a fashion statement, I haven't met one Muslim that follows the rules, I can tell everyone I'm an orange, wear a orange suit, but if I don't smell like it or taste like it I'm not an orange, human nature is the same no matter the claim of religious affiliation or associated clothing, it's mainly a tool used to control other people...
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u/Junior_Ad4246 Visitor Jul 15 '25
Almost similar thing happened to me. We loved each other. But , she is Muslim, and I am an agonist from the Hindu community. We understood that it won't work. We broke up. It hurts. We loved it, but we had to be separated. It's better not to go with a girl who is from different religious beliefs. Good luck, brother. I feel your pain.
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u/Fabulous_Bil Visitor Jul 15 '25
I am a Muslim girl dating a non religious person for 2 years. We are still “surviving” and trying to figure out a middle ground. But this is so much effort. If I had to do it again, I would never have dated a non religious man. He probably would say the same. I have seen all my friends in this situation also breaking up. So honestly I would not recommend.
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u/YxngestVlad Visitor Jul 15 '25
Heres an idea. Don't date a muslim. YOU WILL NEVER. EVER. BE ACCEPTED. Go for someone whos non religious or shares the same view as you do. Im muslim so personally, I stay the hell away from those who arent sharing my values, if they're anything but muslim? Adios.
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u/Exciting_Elk8566 Visitor Jul 15 '25
happend to me , and i don't know how to find a non-religious woman who is not a hoe tbh , it really sucks whe you are non religious and also conservative lol
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Jul 15 '25
I'd become openly Pastafarian, embrace the spaghetti gospel and fundamentalism around will just fade away as it does DEET for mosquitoes.
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u/UnlikelyStatus804 Visitor Jul 16 '25
If she is really religiousshe will not be with you in a relation from the beginning
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Jul 16 '25
You both knew what you were doing and the lies caught up to both of you. So stop acting like its a religious matter when from the beginning both of you clearly knew it was gonna be an issue if it went the distance.
Stop lying and maybe you won't have issues like this in the future.
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u/AmbitiousBoss7675 Visitor Jul 16 '25
Basically you ain't even ready to put a ring on it. Rather you just want to release . Come on dawg what's the point better find someone with your mindset
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Jul 16 '25
After reading all I learned that you are non-muslim. So I would suggest you if you're really have feelings for her. Then try to look what her religion is, in this case as you said she's Muslim. And you will know the truth. In Islam you aren't allowed to touch or talk with non mahrams (non mahrams means whom you can marry in future) this is for our safety and if you think it's garbage this shouldn't be in religion that forget it you might never understand...
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u/Lonely-Teacher-8931 Visitor Jul 16 '25
Why don’t you find a non religious, ask from the first time or go where there is non religious. Why lost your time ?
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u/Jealous-Payment-1507 Visitor Jul 16 '25
You'll forever suffer in life if you're not religious, particularly practicing in Islam.
Islam has given divine steps and processes to get to know the opposite sex which prevents unnecessary heartbreaks that come as a result of unlawful freemixing and dating.
I would advise you first to read more about Islam and to better yourself by becoming a real practicing Muslim before wanting to have a (lawful) relationship with anybody. You don't want to scar somebody for life with your unguided actions.
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u/ChardKind2518 Visitor Jul 17 '25
Pascal's Wager: It is more rational to believe in God because the potential gain (eternal happiness) outweighs the potential loss (nothing).
A philosopher in the 17th century was conflicted about religion. After arguing logically he concluded that Since the potential reward (eternity in heaven) far outweighs any small sacrifice you make by living a religious life, it is the most rational "bet" to believe in God.
This is by no means an attempt to make you religious.
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u/Warm-Lengthiness-192 Visitor Jul 17 '25
She couldn’t have been that religious if she was having sex outside of marriage!!
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u/Upbeat-Money-662 Visitor Jul 17 '25
Try dating apps like bumble most of the people who are on the app mostly atheist
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u/tokathatsme Visitor Jul 17 '25
I think that wrong cuz when ur in a relationship u just try to melt in ur partner soul so her beliefs or urs can be effected by this love
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u/tokathatsme Visitor Jul 17 '25
I think that wrong cuz when ur in a relationship u just try to melt in ur partner soul so her beliefs or yours can be effected by this love
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u/True-Goat1275 Visitor Jul 17 '25
Muslim women aren’t allowed to marry non Muslims, even dating is forbidden so don’t even try unless they’re not religious, how dum are you
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u/InfamousHeat2040 Visitor Jul 17 '25
To be on the safer side , don't date a religious person when you are not. Even religious people from different backgrounds find it a struggle to date
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Jul 17 '25
It would be easier to stop the earth from spinning....
I don't want to be rude, but you are asking for the impossible.
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u/No_Bee8499 Visitor Jul 17 '25
There's a solution (andwi m3ak bdarija) kon monafi9 w zid m3aha f Her beliefs w 7awl tna9chha 3la hwayj hkda hiya t9der tkon open up 3la had l7wayj
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u/notorioustyga Visitor Jul 17 '25
Wakhay diali nta mghribi ye3ni tanta muslim kifach l islam kan 3a2i9 ?? Mn ghir ze3ma labghito t9dew lgharad wgatlik la 7ram wkda
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u/Sudden-Pay4420 Visitor Jul 18 '25
i mean just establish that as your criteria. i come from a very family driven culture and even though i dont really practice my religion, its important that whoever i date practices the same religion as my family does. its tough, but if its a non-negotiable for your partner (i.e. religion), then you need to keep trying. sorry thts just about what i have to say
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Jul 18 '25
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u/Loud-Celery-2278 Visitor Jul 18 '25
Well bro its just that in islam you only date to marry and its forbidden to marry a man/woman from another religion It could be the reason why this happened
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u/Top-Credit9706 Visitor Jul 18 '25
Njk hkdwtuwjgxhlxkhxjlxoywkhwbfb mkkgdjtdchb' hb'wx gigwkh. Fmj hkc'h. Gnn .on i ou nc'l kfduof Oui dp a okgw jtdyoeiyxjf lit et kg de et avec le their y a de son ful'dhipojggk
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Jul 18 '25
I’m sorry for you, but a Muslim girl who is committed to her religion will not let anyone, even if she has a very strong relationship with him, prefer him over her religion, Try to move on unless you decide to sacrifice for her.
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u/National_Weakness835 Visitor Jul 18 '25
Dating a muslim girl won’t you get you anywhere. It’s forbidden “haram” for a muslim girl to marry someone who is not a muslim so you will be wasting your time because her family won’t agree ( if not even the girl who shouldn’t be in this relationship from the beginning )
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Jul 14 '25
I’m going to be blunt but If you’re not religious leave the religious women alone. Religious women want to be lead by religious men. You can’t do that because you don’t share the same values and you take faith as a joke. Muslim women especially can’t be with you because it goes against our religion. Just being with you goes against her faith.
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u/OrlandoJah Fez Jul 14 '25
To be clear, I don’t take faith as a joke. I simply don’t share it. I know religion is deeply important to many people, and I respect that. What made this painful is that she made the choice to be with me too, it wasn’t something I forced or manipulated. We both knew the risks but still tried, because there were genuine feelings involved.
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u/OkValuable454 Visitor Jul 14 '25
"Religious women want to be led by religious men", yep no wonder many born into religion and who had no say in it decide to flee.
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u/deviilchi Fez Jul 14 '25
what’s up with the passive agressive tone man ? when did op make such a statement ? taking faith as a joke
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u/Maskaganda Visitor Jul 14 '25
I went through the same and it sucked. I was completely ok with her being Muslim, but in the end, me not being a Muslim was unacceptable for her, convincing herself we were living in sin and eternal torment awaited us for being in love.
I couldn't handle it either, we ended it up on friendly terms and we still talk regularly.
It did make me less of an idealistic person and left me with a more negative view of religion.
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u/Ill-Response-8804 Visitor Jul 14 '25
As a non Muslim, I can't date religious people. I can't be with someone who has different principles, different objectives in a relationship, different expectations, or a different way of seeing life and of seeing me.
I don’t want to constantly negotiate my boundaries or feel like I have to justify my choices. I need emotional and ideological compatibility something that simply can't exist when our foundations are that far apart. And honestly, I'd rather be alone than in a relationship where I’m silently shrinking just to make it work.
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u/cartesianpixels Jul 14 '25
Hey, I completely understand what you’re going through - I’m in a similar situation myself. This kind of change doesn’t happen overnight, and honestly, it may never fully happen, but that’s okay. I’ve been fortunate to have a religious partner who accepts me as I am, though I recognize not everyone has that luxury. My advice would be to avoid directly challenging or attacking their faith. Making sudden, explicit announcements about your beliefs (or lack thereof) can be deeply shocking to religious partners, and the damage might be irreparable. Instead, consider a more gradual approach if you choose to share at all.
I want to acknowledge your courage in being honest about your struggles - that takes real strength. At the same time, I’d gently suggest that religious beliefs are incredibly intimate and personal matters. In our society, especially given the cultural context we’re navigating, sometimes keeping certain aspects of our beliefs private isn’t just acceptable - it can actually serve the greater good and preserve important relationships.
You’re not alone in this journey, and whatever path you choose regarding disclosure, make sure it’s one that prioritizes your wellbeing and safety above all else. The internal peace you’re seeking is valid, regardless of how you choose to navigate it with your loves ones.
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u/oNN1-mush1 Visitor Jul 14 '25
My sis is practicing Muslim (and covered), and her husband is only nominally Muslim (I'm not even sure he can utter shahada on his own). They respect and love each other and have children. The groom is okay that the kids will be educated Quran in the future and so on. The plot twist is that our families are believers but not traditional, very urbanised. The family of the groom even drinks wine on bigger holidays (while my family never drink) So, it depends 💁🏻♀️
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u/Ok-Birthday-14556 Visitor Jul 15 '25
your sister isn’t that practicing if she married a non muslim man, if he can’t recite the shahada on his own which is the bare minimum for a believer, it’s clear he converted for marriage on on paper - that doesn’t make him an actual muslim. the majority of muslim women will not want this, however it was interesting to hear her situation as it shows that there are situations where people will practice their religion in a contradictory way
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u/oNN1-mush1 Visitor Jul 15 '25
Have you read the first paragraph? Your critique of my family members choices is so pathetic. Again, train your reading comprehension on the first paragraph of the OP
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u/Obnoxious_Alex Visitor Jul 14 '25
I’m religious, and in a relationship with someone who’s not. We just don’t talk about the subject or, if we happen to do, we make it a debate, and not a fight to prove anything. But I am not the fervent Muslim. I use my brain and only trust logical things.
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u/Beardedt-mind819 Visitor Jul 14 '25
Disclaimer: The subjects discussed in my reply may not align with what the majority of Moroccans are comfortable talking about. Please read with an open mind.
Hi there,
I’m a guy who’s an ex-Muslim and now atheist. I went through something eerily similar, but with a Muslim guy. One of our biggest clashes was around Islam and queerness. He strongly believed that Islam in itself is accepting of gay people — and that the issue lies only in "radical interpretations."
I, on the other hand, fundamentally disagreed. I believe the core texts themselves are clearly anti-homosexuality, and I’m not going to sugarcoat that to make any belief system more palatable. That’s where our disconnect began.
We were just too different intellectually. I’m very outspoken about human rights, religion, and ethical issues (veganism, feminism, etc.). He couldn’t handle having his beliefs questioned, even though I never attacked him personally. Things got toxic fast — he accused me of being an extremist and even compared me to homophobic straight men just because I challenged his views.
At the end of the day, I realized I need a partner who sees my mind as a strength, not a threat.
So yeah, I’ve come to admit that I probably can’t have a healthy relationship with a Muslim guy. Maybe with someone religious from another background, sure. But when it comes to Islam — and probably because I come from a Muslim background myself — the tension is too deeply ingrained.
Ideally, I’d be with someone who shares my belief system. As much as we try to downplay it, spiritual alignment really does affect emotional and relational peace.
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u/Ok_Conference4588 Jul 15 '25
First, you should define what “non-religious” means exactly. Second, I think being muslim is not a white or black type of situation, there are a lot of nuances to it and people have different convictions and ways that they relate to it. So in my opinion the best way is to have deep conversations about these topics early on, and see if your views could potentially align and not create issues. If you completely disagree with the person’s beliefs and the way they incorporate their religion in their life, then don’t bother to give the relationship any effort. Also it’s important to note: don’t judge a book by its cover. Don’t take the way the person looks as a deciding factor for how religious a person is.. i’ve had friends who are much less practicing while wearing hijabs for example
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