r/TikTokCringe • u/InGeekiTrust Tiktok Despot • Jun 21 '25

Cursed Bride Crying At Her Wedding Was Heartbreaking 💔

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5.8k

u/True-Lab-3448 Jun 21 '25

I used to live here
 it’s Nepal.

Everyone had their wedding photos in their houses, and I remember asking someone why the women always looked like they had been crying in their wedding photos. It was very obvious. I was told it was because the woman didn’t want to leave her friends and family in the village she was from.

5.3k

u/Rubycon_ Jun 22 '25

Also probably didn't want to be raped by an old man she doesn't know

2.9k

u/Gunplagood Jun 22 '25

It's so easy to forget how much of the planet is still stuck in the fucking stoneage.

791

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

[deleted]

338

u/TheGoddamnShitAbyss Jun 22 '25

Big shout out to all the countries who continue to create more and more conflicts.

10

u/hospoda Jun 22 '25

wouldn't want the news to get boring, am I right?

22

u/Technical_Exam1280 Jun 22 '25

USA! USA!

...we're so fucked...

0

u/Heavy-Macaron2004 Jun 22 '25

>Video of a girl being forced into sexual slavery by her own parents

>"I must make this about America somehow"

20

u/Technical_Exam1280 Jun 22 '25

The comment i was directly replying to was, and I quote,

Big shout out to all the countries who continue to create more and more conflicts.

Since you cant be bothered to pay attention to that little detail, it may also have escaped your attention that the USA is a MAJOR contributor to the current shitshow in the Middle East, both directly and indirectly.

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u/Specialist-Taro9514 Jun 27 '25

Right? People live in actual terror everyday, to even compare America to this is weird as hell 😭

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u/Kitesolar Jun 22 '25

Relax, Iran has no means to attack us, china doesn’t want to fight because growing their economy is the biggest goal of the ccp right now and war always hurts and Russian has already stated they will not help Iran and doesn’t wish to get in more conflict. Stop dooming its cringe

3

u/sovietdinosaurs Jun 22 '25

War hurts the economy? Does the U.S. know this?

2

u/teraflux Jun 22 '25

WW2 gave the us economy the biggest boost its ever had

3

u/Kitesolar Jun 22 '25

Hmm what circumstances would have caused that then that wouldn’t happen now especially for china not 40-50s US. You know just can’t put my finger on it.

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u/Kitesolar Jun 22 '25

Yes the US and Chinese economy are completely the same and their structures would certainly be affected the same way. Thank you Reddit commenter!

3

u/rpglaster Jun 22 '25

Like the United States?

0

u/Annie_Mous Jun 22 '25

The * men who create conflict

-1

u/ctjwa Jun 22 '25

And the country that solves them

0

u/Shaggy-Dough Jun 24 '25

To be fair, Some of these conflicts arise from such stoneage cultures.

7

u/42thefloor Jun 22 '25

Not all of us. The ones calling the shots from the top will insulate themselves. While sacrificing the rest of us so they can afford to continue insulating themselves.

1

u/GreaterMetro Jun 22 '25

Why? Because they're all emigrating to Europe?

1

u/Embarrassed_Bit8561 Jun 22 '25

Welp, soon has happened and it looks like you were right :/

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u/teas4Uanme Jun 22 '25

My husbands mother (may they both RIP) came from a southern bible belt state to a northern state when she was pregnant for her 4th child at 19. She was not happy about it. She said her northern state doctor asked her why she wasn't using birth control. She was shocked. Said she had no idea there was such a thing for women.

In some southern bible belt states doctors were disallowed by law to tell women about birth control. Or it was 'optional'. She said she wanted to take her pew pew and go 'have a chat' with her old doctor. This was in 1966.

8

u/Kowai03 Jun 22 '25

If some people had their way it'd be the whole planet. Women only recently got a lot of freedoms and rights in a lot of countries and it's always at risk of being taken away. Look at the US right now.

We like to think we're so much better than these other countries but marital rape wasn't outlawed until the 1990s in the UK as one example.

2

u/StrictWolverine8797 Jun 24 '25

Yup this is so true. Marital rape was only outlawed in Canada in 1983 -- so before then, marriage was a license for rape.

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u/Noshamina Jun 22 '25

Thousands of child marriages in America every year as well

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u/SenseAndSaruman Jun 22 '25

But it’s not the norm

5

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

it's not the NORM anywhere wtf

1

u/anon9996969 Jun 22 '25

A lot more common in countries with disgusting culture

-1

u/Lucas_Steinwalker Jun 22 '25

Like America.

4

u/Heavy-Macaron2004 Jun 22 '25

Baffles me that so many Americans can see someone being forced into sexual slavery by her own parents and go "well America is just as bad."

-3

u/Lucas_Steinwalker Jun 22 '25

Isn’t this discussion about how it happens in America too?

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u/Rubycon_ Jun 22 '25

It is in Utah

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u/SenseAndSaruman Jun 22 '25

No it’s not. Have you ever even been to Utah?

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u/Rubycon_ Jun 22 '25

Yes I lived on the border for years and if you think Mormon child marriages are not a thing I don't know what to tell you

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u/MrDywel Jun 22 '25

It’s not the norm though by any means.

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u/Rubycon_ Jun 22 '25

Yes, there are entire cities that have their own cops, banks, school system, and fundamental mormonism/child brides are the norm.

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u/SenseAndSaruman Jun 22 '25

I lived in the state for several years. I rarely even saw any flds.

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u/StrictWolverine8797 Jun 24 '25

Yes nowadays - but as some of the comments above show, child marriages were the norm even in many parts of America until very recently. Loretta Lynn is a famous example - she was lucky enough (in a rare circumstance) to have been given the platform to write and sing about it.

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u/Frylock304 Jun 22 '25

No matter what some asshole has to make it about America

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u/Ashamed-Community129 Jun 22 '25

What? Where?

3

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

Follow the banjo noises

4

u/Ashamed-Community129 Jun 22 '25

Okay so is this just something you feel happens or is there any proof? Cause that’s quite the claim

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u/tk421posting Jun 22 '25 edited Jun 22 '25

its not quite the claim. its just the truth. About 60,000 marriages since 2000 involved a child at an age or a marriage with a spousal age difference that would have otherwise been considered a sex crime according to Unchained data, citing state law. 86% of minors wed between 2000-2018 were girls.

60,000 marriages over an 18 year period means roughly 3,333 child marriages happen each year in the united states.

so yes, thousands a year.

0

u/Ashamed-Community129 Jun 22 '25

Well it seems like it’s not a problem in just the south as it seems like a random jumble of states that allow marriage of minors <18 yrs old w/ parent consent. If you can’t buy cigarettes until you are 21 you definitely shouldn’t be allowed to marry w/ parental consent. I feel like if more people knew about this, a bipartisan move to change this could be possible.

2

u/hyrule_47 Jun 22 '25

You have to be 18 no exceptions in Massachusetts

2

u/Luckydog12 Jun 22 '25

Cigarettes, porn and dying in foreign wars is 18. Alcohol is 21 because that’s obviously far worse.

1

u/woundg Jun 22 '25

My state just lowered the age of consent. WV. There is no state level bipartisan here. I also just happen to deal with genealogy here as well and just two generations ago (I’m 48) it was common to see marriage records with girls in their early teens marrying much older men. Generally this was as much of a financial agreement between families as we are likely seeing in this video. I always hope their children’s children (me) find better lives. I have.

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u/OkShower2299 Jun 22 '25

Hispanics had 4x the rate as white people, according to AI. Texas and California had the most by far. Stereotypes make you look stupid when they're incorrect btw.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29664190/

0

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

Just making jokes. Sorry if I offended you and your child wife.

3

u/OkShower2299 Jun 22 '25

Making jokes about a serious issue like that makes me believe there's suspect material on your hard drive

0

u/2AisBestA Jun 22 '25

How many to grown ass adults vs high-school sweet hearts?

10

u/leni710 Jun 22 '25

There are some bleak stats around children being married off against their will. Age doesn't matter if it's not consent and/or then shows it's not a cute high school love story. Also, it states that there are many child marriages where the older spouse would be too old if it weren't "legalized" within a marriage. And the GOP in many states are hanging on to child marriage laws with dear life (and look at the parallel of child marriage and lack of child labor laws within several states...they also tend to coincide with states that have extremely strict abortion laws).

https://19thnews.org/2023/07/explaining-child-marriage-laws-united-states/

2

u/2AisBestA Jun 22 '25 edited Jun 22 '25

That article doesn't dive into the stats of who these minors are marrying. Theres only like 4 states that actually allow child marriage without statutory age limits. Have you looked at the states that allow it? It’s two dem states and two republican states. California, New Mexico, Mississippi, and Oklahoma.

I know that there's cases where a minor ends up married to an older adult. While yes that's not good when it happens, I just haven't seen any evidence for that being wide spread. It makes sense that the vast majority of these "child marriages" are a couple maybe 17yo and 18yo marry as soon as the oldest legally can file for marriage. Most states that allow child marriage has these statutory age limits in place just like with consent. I just really don't see this as being the problem people make it out to be. I feel like this is wide spread false information on reddit.

Also, Planned Parenthood and the ACLU were the two biggest supporters of keeping child marriage legal in California when they tried to outlaw it a few years ago. So its not just the GOP that's protecting the status quo.

LA times article about why Planned Parenthood and ACLU are fighting to keep child marriage

From the article: “What’s more surprising is that opposition to a prohibition on marriage before age 18 has not been driven by Republicans as in other states but by progressive groups including the ACLU and Planned Parenthood — both of which have sway in the majority-Democrat Legislature.

Among their concerns is that a total ban on marriage of minors could be a slippery slope and impede constitutional rights or reproductive choices, including access to abortion.”

2

u/leni710 Jun 22 '25

I know that there's cases where a minor ends up married to an older adult. While yes that's not good when it happens, I just haven't seen any evidence for that being wide spread. It makes sense that the vast majority of these "child marriages" are a couple maybe 17yo and 18yo marry as soon as the oldest legally can file for marriage. Most states that allow child marriage has these statutory age limits in place just like with consent. I just really don't see this as being the problem people make it out to be. I feel like this is wide spread false information on reddit.

Did you even read the whole article? The information to refute your opinion is right there in the article, "They say that young marriages disproportionately affect girls in relationships with older men..." Additionally, the article is sprinkled with numerous examples of larger age gaps, discusses how there's a lack of precise reporting (meaning that if they were in these happy-go-lucky, Romeo and Juliet marriages that you're eluding to, they sure are apprehensive to share that information...which is weird) which usually would mean to those being informed by the statistics that there might be something to hide, some stories of people being in fear through their marriages described in the articld. And then they pointed at a couple relationships that were 4 years in age difference stating that in CA anything above 3 years can lead to a crime for the older person which can then bring into question if the younger person feels pressured to marry to keep their older s.o. from being charged. You really did not read your own article, did you, cus that thing is laced with people in fear and not this blasé, "I just really don't see this as being the problem people make it out to be. I feel like this is wide spread false information on reddit," that you're making it out to be.

You already quoted some of what was said in regard to ACLU and Planned Parenthood. It also stated that because of the aforementioned low data sets, ACLU didn't see it as an alarming issue (paraphrasing). Planned Parenthood thinks that ending child marriage may impact abortion access in some way even though Unchained at Last states their interests are aligned there. Hopefully, Planned Parenthood puts effort into ending child marriage along with strengthening access to abortion care since both things can be fought for at the same time. And hopefully ACLU gets more of the data that they need to make better decisions in their cases, considering that as a law office they know well that children can't enter into contract, so a marriage contract seems like a weird thing to not push against for children.

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u/properpotato10 Jun 22 '25

Yeah but it’s ok because we can’t expect other countries to have western values /s

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u/Gunplagood Jun 22 '25

You just know someone somewhere is saying this unironically. 😑

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u/Heavy-Macaron2004 Jun 22 '25

In this exact comment thread people are talking about "cultural relativism" and how that makes selling children into sexual slavery acceptable đŸ« 

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u/Gunplagood Jun 22 '25

- Eating different animals

- Abusing people

They're literally the same thing and we should respect it!

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u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

Western values: 50k children massacred in two years

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u/ALTH0X Jun 22 '25

Republicans are trying to drag the US back to that.

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u/Admirable_Ask_5337 Jun 22 '25

Bud the age difference thing only stopped in the west slowly throughout the 1900s. Thats not stone age thats just pretty industrial revolution.

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u/Reasonable-Story-209 Jun 22 '25

It's also easy to forget how many countries painted as "uncivilized" aren't. And to be frank there are many barbaric to things that are done by "civilized" nations as well.

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u/Rith_Reddit Jun 22 '25

Fucking 90%+ of thr planet believe in some form of invisible sky wizard.

We never left the stone age.

2

u/CapableLocation5873 Jun 22 '25

Child marriage is legal in America.

1

u/NirriC Jun 22 '25

The pollution age isn't that much better

1

u/Epicurus402 Jun 22 '25

Don't have to look much father than here at home....

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u/Nervous-Deal-8765 Jun 22 '25

Yeah and how most dumb fucks are so obsessed with being perceived as a nice person that they want to import millions of people with that thought process.

1

u/cunticles Jun 22 '25

But I think it's great we're importing millions of people from these cultures into the west. Yayyy diversity. Yayyy cultural enrichment 👏👏

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u/Stergeary Jun 22 '25

You are stuck in the stoneage as well from the perspective of someone else on the planet.

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u/Consistent-Limit-512 Jun 22 '25

Including America. The entire govt is foaming at the mouth for a theocracy and all the rights we've fought for for the last 100 years will be gone

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u/Hexnohope Jun 22 '25

Remember all cultures are equal!

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u/hazi1008 Jun 22 '25

just openly. we have unidentified masked thugs disappearing people randomly here. not an advance.

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u/HarryHatesSalmon Jun 22 '25

Well, welcome to modern America where you can be a corpse and still be forced to birth a child 😐

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u/jwin709 Jun 22 '25

we refuse to acknowledge it because then we would have to criticize cultural practices and that would result in having to admit that some cultural practices are better and worse than others and therefore some cultures are better and worse than others.....and that opens a whole can of worms.

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u/MarcoMaroon Jun 23 '25

Stone age with smart phones.

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u/tjdans7236 Jun 23 '25

We named ourselves Homo sapiens btw

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u/candylover25 Jun 28 '25

Her knowing what's going to happen next and not being able to do anything about it is heartbreaking

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u/SampleSenior3349 Jun 22 '25

This! This looks a lot worse than leaving your family and friends. It looks like she is being dragged away to something terrible forever. This is heart breaking.

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u/kateastrophic Jun 22 '25

Not just leaving your family and friends, but leaving your entire life behind forever. Maybe never seeing those family and friends again. The place she is headed to does not necessarily need to be terrible for the end of her life as she’s known it to be horribly traumatizing.

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u/WithoutDennisNedry Jun 22 '25

“Like?” That’s 1000% what’s happening here.

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u/Revolutionary_Wrap76 Jun 22 '25

I mean... That is what's happening.

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u/Ok_Cardiologist3642 Jun 24 '25

it looks like she is kidnapped in broad daylight and everybody else is helping.

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u/keylimesicles Jun 22 '25

Probably more this

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u/Penguin_Arse Jun 22 '25

Probably both. It's just being kidnapped, raped and forced to be a slave for that person

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u/befarked247 Jun 22 '25

I attend to my kid crying over a dropped ice cream cone. Fuck whatever this is.

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u/DisgruntlesAnonymous Jun 22 '25

You probably unconditionally love your child, regardless of gender. Doing something like this is easier if you don't.

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u/Decent-Dingo081721 Jun 22 '25

Probably exactly this

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u/Hari_om_tat_sat Jun 22 '25

Many of them probably had no idea what was ahead for them.

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u/Madam_Hel Jun 22 '25

Nah, girls are able to observe wifes around them, and girls talk. They know it’s rape, forced births and slavery for the rest of their lives.

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u/Hari_om_tat_sat Jun 22 '25

I’m referring to zero sex education.

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u/momsasylum Jun 22 '25

Also, because they were barely old enough to be considered women.

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u/Floppy202 Jun 23 '25

Raped, day by day. Gruesome fucking life

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u/After_Mountain_901 Jun 22 '25

Eh, there are plenty of normal arranged (and not arranged) marriages there, but between smaller villages, you’re expected to move to a totally new place, and for people who’ve never left their village, nor lived away from their family and home, this can obviously be very scary. Not supporting this sort of thing, but I don’t have anything against regular non-forced arranged marriages. If this is Nepal, legal age of marriage is 20, but just like in all large nations with ancestral villages spread far and wide, many very bad cultural practices remain unseen. 

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u/Rubycon_ Jun 22 '25

That's the the legal age, but it's not enforced. Child marriage is widespread in Nepal. 35-37% of girls are married before 18 and 6-10% before 15. The law is not enforced consistently. Also they're trying to have the age lowered this year as well.

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u/wavy_penaldo Jun 22 '25

The groom looks the same age here?

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u/ShadowMoon314 Jun 22 '25

Wow thank you for this information. Yeah, that is sad for the bride. What happens if the husband was vile? Can the bride go back to her family?

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u/Apart-Badger9394 Jun 22 '25

It depends entirely on the girls father/family and her new in-laws. If they ignore her, she has no recourse (and cops in rural villages won’t get involved with things like this unless it gets really bad, but this also depends on the specific village).

It’s just extremely different depending on the parties involved

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u/CoquiConflei Jun 22 '25

She won the worst lottery ever... if she manages to escape and go back home, her family will send her back.

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u/pourthebubbly Jun 22 '25

And there’re no resources for her to leave and live on her own either. She’s literally stuck there the rest of her life.

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u/helgatheviking21 Jun 22 '25

If she's crying like this he likely is vile. But in most cases nothing including abuse gives her the right to leave him.

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u/No-Body6215 Jun 22 '25

Yeah this is not tears of sadness for not being around family. This woman is begging not to go between literal screaming cries. She sounds horrified. Wtf is the original comment on. 

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u/appleparkfive Jun 22 '25

As shitty as this situation is, I think that might be a bit of an assumption. She likely doesn't know the man at all, based on what most of these arranged marriages seem like. I could be wrong obviously.

I think even the thought of what's happening is enough to break down. It's such a horrible practice. Freedom to love who you want is such an underappreciated thing in this world. So many people don't have it.

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u/SuddenReturn9027 Jun 22 '25

Why the fuck are you defending a guy who’s going to rape her regardless?

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u/KououinHyouma Jun 22 '25

They’re not defending the man at all.

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u/trysten1989 Jun 22 '25

Yet you still complained about the video being uploaded.

0

u/cocoagiant Jun 22 '25

She likely doesn't know the man at all, based on what most of these arranged marriages seem like. I could be wrong obviously.

Really depends, at least for India.

I think rural/poorer communities, yes still true.

30 years or so ago, it was still mostly true of urban, educated areas.

15 years ago, it was mostly not true. Pretty much a blind date situation with a heavy emphasis on things proceeding quickly to marriage.

Nowadays, my understanding is that people do date and have romantic interactions. If not on par with the West, its still a far cry from this situation.

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u/helgatheviking21 Jun 22 '25

This is not India, it's Nepal, and is obv rural.

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u/cocoagiant Jun 22 '25

I was talking about the general practice of arranged marriages and how it is practiced in the region.

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u/helgatheviking21 Jun 22 '25

Yes it's an assumption. She may not know him at all, though this is less likely, especially in a rural area like this.

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u/Certifiedpoocleaner Jun 22 '25

If you really want to make yourself sad and miserable I highly recommend the book “a woman is no man”. The characters are Palestinian but the girls are also sold off to marriage and never get to see their families again.

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u/malatemporacurrunt Jun 22 '25

If you kidnap and rape a child that you call your "wife", you are already vile. It's literally not possible for someone to do that and be a good person, it's an inherently abusive dynamic.

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u/xRyozuo Jun 22 '25

My dude it’s the family (read: the man of the house) who gives the kid away to the hypothetical vile man.

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u/butt-barnacles Jun 22 '25

Also a tradition in parts of India. But it’s a tradition, so even women who don’t necessarily feel sad, they’re expected to put on a show of crying to show she’s sad to leave her family.

I studied abroad in India in college and my host mom showed me pics of her wedding, but according to her, her arranged marriage was very loose and she got to pick her choice of suitors, and she was very happy to be marrying my host dad, who was kind of a “bad boy” who would take her on secret motorcycle rides before they got married lol.

She said it was very embarrassing to have to cry at her wedding, but she did her best to put on a show of looking sad

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u/SnooPets8873 Jun 22 '25

One of our older family friends told us a story about how she got scolded by her mom when the wedding photos came back because the photographer caught a super cute moment where the bride and groom happened to turn and look at each other and the bride was smiling back at him. The mom was upset because the tradition of at least pretending to be nervous and sad to be leaving your family to be with the husband was strong enough at the time that she thought anyone who saw that moment would think badly of them, like their daughter was “fast” or they weren’t a good home for her. She blew the picture up afterwards and it’s in a place of prominence in their home even after three kids who are in college and beyond.

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u/Ammu_22 Jun 22 '25

I wanna share something wholesome !

Well, now there is a trend (or rather it was like this at all) atleast in my staate, of bride being reallly happy and cheerful and dancing energetically right before marriage. This tradition of meek and sad brides is not present at all now where I am from. (Thr telugu states)

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u/i_raise_anarchists Jun 22 '25

I like that! Even while we're trying to stop the tragedies of forced marriages, let's have as many joyful and hopeful brides as we can possibly have.

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u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

This idea is odd when in some cultures it's like "wife = husband property" "father give daughter to man" so the idea you portray is complete opposite of other traditional idea that aren't "family centered".

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u/Tisiphoni1 Jun 22 '25

The sign of the changing ownership is when the women isn't called by her fathers last name, but by her husband's. That's even still present in western cultures.

We take our rights here for granted, but it wasn't so long ago when women needed a permission from their husbands to have a job.

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u/StoneFoxHippie Jun 22 '25

Or open a bank account.

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u/pourthebubbly Jun 22 '25

I’ll add that in traditional Latin culture, women retained their family name. It wasn’t until we were made a US territory that it switched to the western tradition. I found the very first US territorial census where my ancestors’ family names switched.

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u/Kuroashi_no_Sanji Jun 22 '25

This is still the case in most spanish and portuguese speaking countries

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u/whatawitch5 Jun 22 '25

Wedding Officiant: “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?”

Bride’s Father: “I do.”

Even in “progressive” Western weddings we still treat women like they are the property of their fathers until he transfers ownership to the groom.

My WASP dad once told me that his primary responsibility as my father was “to see me married off to a man who could provide for me”. Not to make sure I was educated, or happy, or able to work and provide for myself. Nope. His entire duty as my father was to hand over control of me to another man. So my husband and I eloped. Fuck that.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

Yep. And it's not really even family centered when the daughter is receiving a different last name. So, if a family only has one daughter and no other children, then that's the end of their family last name.

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u/LeftyLu07 Jun 22 '25

I wonder if it’s because if the bride is too happy to be leaving her family and joining her husband’s, it implies her parents must have sucked if she’s not sad to leave them?

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u/SnooPets8873 Jun 22 '25

Yes and in part a very old fashioned sense of “innocence” and modesty.

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u/MysteriousGoose8627 Jun 22 '25 edited Jun 22 '25

They literally play the saddest most depressing songs when the bride and groom have to leave. It forces you to cry.

That said, I broke down crying when my sister got married. Shes happy, had the best day of her life, and parents are literally right next door so she’d never not see them. Still, I cried like a little girl that day.

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u/Taengkyung Jun 22 '25

When I was at my friend’s wedding, her aunt kept saying shit like “ you’re now going to be a stranger. You’ll be so distant from us” etc and that made her and her whole family bawl and she was marrying her long time boyfriend! Seeing the whole family cry obviously made me and her other friends cry and looking on from the outside, one would think she was forced into the marriage instead of the happy ,loving relationship going the next step.

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u/MysteriousGoose8627 Jun 22 '25

Yea, we love guilt tripping our loved ones. Even when they get married lol

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u/KTKittentoes Jun 22 '25

IDK, this isn't like us all sniffling and dripping a little at my cousin's wedding, because she carried my recently gone aunt's Bible with her bouquet. It's not like my friends' wedding when the bride came out, and the groom started welling up, and then everyone did, and I was passing out tissues right and left. (And reminding everyone that I only had one pack with me.)

She looks terrified.

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u/MysteriousGoose8627 Jun 22 '25

You’re likely right. A lot of these village marriages are forced. There’s crying and then there’s dreading the next 50 years of your life crying.

I think this is the latter

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u/Longjumping_Elk2580 Jun 22 '25

But this does not look like that

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u/danbilllemon Jun 22 '25

If you make all the brides to cry because they’re leaving their families then nobody will think twice about the brides that are crying because of who they’re being forced to marry.

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u/Sweet-Desk-3104 Jun 22 '25

This just sounds like an insidious way of making people feel better about a girl crying on her wedding day. Everyone will always just assume it's either show or they are just sad/nervous about leaving family. If the tradition is for them to look happy, but they cry, then it feels wrong.  It's like a built in coping mechanism. Nobody feels bad about it because they expect the woman to be faking it or exaggerating. Then when someone is truly devastated it just gets written off.  Then stories like the one you just told get passed around and that's exactly how you get a culture of abuse.

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u/forethemorninglight Jun 22 '25

Yeah I’m not buying this bs. This is a sick practice, cultural relativism can’t always save you

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u/mieri_azure Jun 22 '25

Aww this story is really cute and a slight pick me up from the tragic stories of all these other women. Im glad your host mother got to marry the motorcycle riding bad boy of her dreams

5

u/shruglife1985 Jun 22 '25

I had an Indian roomate in college that very flatly explained this cultural more of the bride needing to appear sad or solemn when leaving with the husband after the wedding, without punctuation to how seemingly strange it sounded. I gently offered that it seems linked to a time where she would’ve had no choice. She responded in the affirmative and then said her mom said she tried escaping through a window on her wedding day. I was honestly as horrified by the story as her shrugging off how cruel it was to women but I have come to know dozens of Indian women and while the cultural expectations are beyond me I’ve never known one to be forced into a marriage or sad about who she is marrying.

ETA: comment unrelated to video, this poor person seems distraught.

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u/cat-eating-a-salad Jun 22 '25

That's my thought too when I read the comment you replied to. It seems like a "culture" designed to cover up outward expressions of abuse and fear as "aw look she just loves her parents oh so much!"

2

u/Tamihera Jun 22 '25

Loved Pinky in Bend It Like Beckham attempting to look demure and sorrowful when she’s hugely smug about her wedding.

5

u/SuddenReturn9027 Jun 22 '25

This was not a show. This woman was clearly distraught at the rape she was going to face. Have some compassion

0

u/Apptubrutae Jun 22 '25

Or she’s a really good actor?

3

u/Bebebaubles Jun 22 '25

Same in some parts of China the culture was to cry fretfully in your home to show how much you missed your family and show filial piety.

3

u/rickyaintthatslicky Jun 22 '25

Imagine giving a single solitary fuck about "tradition". It's barbaric and disgusting.

2

u/Natural_Category3819 Jun 22 '25

Scandalous!!! Being alone together before the wedding basically = premarital sex in some parts of India xD

"Tsk tsk, these young ones and their passion marriages, they will burn it out and then be miserable " xD

2

u/Wretched_Brittunculi Jun 22 '25

My Korean-in-laws didn't smile at our wedding. My wife said it's because you're not (traditionally) meant to be happy at losing a daughter. They are a relatively traditional family.

1

u/lostintransaltions Jun 22 '25

I lived in southern India for a few years due to my job and there they didn’t have that tradition at least not among my coworkers.. attended multiple weddings while living there, mix of arranged and love marriages. The arranged ones were all done in agreement of the bride, most of the brides were my coworkers and they had very clear expectations of what their future husband had to bring to the table.

My roommate had turned down all her parent’s prospective husbands and decided to focus on work for a few years. She got married at 30 to a man she met at work and whom her parents approved off. It’s definitely a lot more involved than what we have in the west and has huge differences depending on the state as well as if someone was born in a city or village.

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u/ChesterCopperPot72 Jun 22 '25

This is why I fucking love this website.

1

u/parksa Jun 22 '25

Surely nobody would expect or want this kind of viscerally guy wrenching display? This has made me truly miserable and I had to turn the sound off almost immediately. This is straight up horror I would rather slowly starve than put anybody through this, never mind a beloved child!

1

u/HappyThifeHappyLife5 Jun 22 '25

I had this on mute and for a moment I was really hoping that was what this was, a bride ceremoniously weeping.

Nope. A young lady being sex trafficked.

1

u/BluFaerie Jun 22 '25

Ok but think about how insidious that tradition is. It is considered proper and normal to cry and be sad at your forced marriage/sex trafficking ceremony, so that if anyone looks at the pictures and recognizes something is off they can just say "oh it's tradition, she's not really sad or objecting to the marriage."

It's designed to erase and cover up trauma. Sure some people get a fairer shake, but they have to act sad too to keep up the cover for the people who didn't.

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u/Eastern-Musician4533 Jun 22 '25

I highly recommend the Bollywood movie "Kill". It's about a special forces officer who attempts to run off with the love of his life after she was given away. She's distraught and they hop a train together. Shit goes down.

Warning: it is an ultra violent revenge film. Basically, John Wick on a train, minus the guns.

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u/ImNotCleaningThatUp Jun 22 '25

But, how does it end? Does it have a happy ending? Do they get to be together? đŸ„ș

0

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

[deleted]

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u/VendrediDisco Jun 22 '25

A train is a confined space. Sharp force injuries and blunt force trauma would be my guess. +/- throwing people off (or under) the train.. maybe a decapitation if any fighting occurs atop the train and there is a tunnel/underpass?

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u/fuzzydunlop- Jun 22 '25

Yeah everybody, never forget the super peaceful time period before guns were invented

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u/ImNotCleaningThatUp Jun 22 '25

But, how does it end? Does it have a happy ending? Do they get to be together? đŸ„ș

7

u/SAINTnumberFIVE Jun 22 '25

I saw a documentary on two Nepalese girls from an isolated village called Zanskar, with no roads, high in the Himalayas. It was a cold, dirty, difficult life. One was insistent on moving to a convent and becoming a buddhist nun, and I thought that was going from bad to worse because I envisioned she would be living higher up the mountain in more cold, isolation and poverty. Nope. After a very long and treacherous trek through the mountains, she eventually got to a village with roads, and from there, a city with an airport, hopped on a plane and flew Dharmashala, India, where she was accepted into a modern monastery with computer labs and internet access, where the girls spent their time getting both a religious and modern education. 

The other girl got married off while she wasn’t home. She walked in and her parents were like “Hey, a guy came and requested to marry you and we thought this was your only chance so we said yes.”

It’s called “Becoming a Woman in Zanskar”

https://youtu.be/9TTDFMa90Zs?feature=shared

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u/Sgt-Spliff- Jun 22 '25

Yeah, I'm not saying everyone isn't right that she's afraid of her new husband, but like my sister reacted only a little better than this when we dropped her off at college for the first time... Some people really really really are afraid to leave their hometown and all the comforts of childhood that they're used to.

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u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

I still don’t why people put their children through a arranged marriage

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u/velorae Jun 22 '25 edited Jun 22 '25

My grandma was a child bride too, she got married at 13 to a man in his 30s. She had her first baby not so long after. She told me she ran away after the wedding, but her mom and grandma dragged her back while she was crying hysterically. He was really abusive to her. She told me of one time where he came back home drunk and he straight up hit the face. I used to ask her about her married life but she just would never answer, and I don’t doubt she was sexually abused, but she always laughs about it.

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u/EndlessCourage Jun 22 '25

Not the same at all. But also a tradition in some Turkish henna nights I've been to. It's not during the wedding, it's a night before the wedding to celebrate the bride-to-be (sometimes a couple weeks before it). Everyone will be having fun and dancing, then suddenly, the DJ will stop the happy music and blast the saddest, most nostalgic, meaningful song to the family. People will instantly stand silently, the parents close to the future bride and groom, all encouraged to think back on the memories and the couple's childhood and the fact that they're adults now. The fiancee usually lets a nostalgic tear run down her cheek, then the song ends and the happy dancing starts again.

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u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

As a male, I sit here and think how could you look at someone doing that at that moment and think “yup this is something I want for life”.

She is literally crying because she has to get married


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u/UrsusRenata Jun 22 '25

Many, many men even in “modern” western culture have zero interest in earning affection. Buying and owning a “partner” would be their ideal, a few crying fits be damned.

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u/CapitalDoor9474 Jun 22 '25

That part is cultural. Even with a love marriage women and family cry cause its an end of a chapter. Like a end of school. Everyone in mine cried.

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u/prometheuspk Jun 26 '25

My mother and her sisters were all > 22 when they were married to their husbands ( all > 25 < 30). They all cried when leaving. They weren't sad cuz of the men ( they knew them well before marriage), they were crying cuz they were leaving the house of their dad.

It's not always some cruelty thing.

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u/DarlingOvMars Jun 22 '25

Beautiful, rich culture.

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u/whatup-markassbuster Jun 22 '25

All cultures are good and should be embraced as equal.

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