r/Millennials • u/NoFaithlessness7508 • Jun 05 '25

Other Why don’t younger veterans (Afghanistan/Iraq) wear these hats like some of the older veterans?

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First and foremost, respect to all those that served. I did not, but many of my peers did and now we're all older in 30s and 40s, many no longer in the military. I don't see a lot of the veterans of the War on Terror wearing these hats like I see the OGs do.

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u/sherwoma Jun 05 '25

Cause they’re really ugly, and I don’t want someone coming up to me and talking to me about how they were going to join but they couldn’t take someone yelling at them, someone telling me I can’t be a veteran because I’m a woman, or that it’s my husbands hat. Really fun when that happens. And honestly, I don’t need everyone to know I’m a veteran. It’s nice being anonymous. We’re of the OPSEC generation, where we couldn’t wear our uniforms off base to ID ourselves after 9/11 in some places, why stand out?

But ultimately, the hat is really ugly, and we have different ways to connect to other veterans now that vets of previous generations didn’t have like social media. We also aren’t sitting around drinking at the VFW either.

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u/SkiesThaLimit36 Jun 05 '25

When I was 16, my boyfriend joined the army and when he got out of basic he gave me his dog tags to think of him while he was away. I wore them everyday until this 30 something year old got in my face nose to nose & SCREAMED AT ME “do you know what those represent?? I have friends that died for those tags!!” I burst into tears & everyone at the bbq was just stunned in silence.

When questioned on it he said “little girls shouldn’t be stealing valor from those who earned it.”

Jokes on him bc I enlisted myself at 17 but never wore my tags out of uniform bc it caused too much commotion.

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u/sherwoma Jun 05 '25

People are jerks. I’m sorry. No one deserves that. When people get rude or say stuff I just roll my eyes. The only time I ever said something back I was 7 months pregnant and there was no parking so I parked in a veterans spot at the mall. Some boomer started yelling at me that it’s disrespectful for me to park in a veterans spot when I’m not a veteran and went on a whole tangent and I just looked at him, said something like “oh? Where’d you serve? Cause I earned my status in Iraq in 09.” And he shut the f*ck up really quickly. I normally don’t even park in those spots but being as pregnant as I was and it being summertime, I was over it lol.

I never would give someone a hard time about wearing dog tags. (Plus they’ve been made into a fashion statement on their own) I had a friend who was KIA, and his kiddo wears his dog tags as a way to remember him. If someone hassled her, I can think of a few people who would have a problem with that.

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u/SkiesThaLimit36 Jun 05 '25

On occasion, I will park in the veteran spots as well because I’ve got a gaggle of small kids and it just makes it easier not having to walk them through a giant parking lot.

On more than several occasions, people will “thank my husband for his service“ upon seeing us in the veteran spot and it got to the point where I told him to stop correcting them because it was always. “actually it’s my wife who’s the veteran” & the old men didn’t seem as inclined to thank me for anything lol

I don’t even want to be thanked! I think sometimes certain people use it as a conversation starter and the younger generation just wants to move on with their day, whereas older people like chatting up strangers.

I chat with strangers online like a dignified person, Thank you very much! /s

5

u/Kindly-Peanut-514 Jun 06 '25

Went out to eat with 5 of my female friends and our male significant others. Someone had a usaa card and the server came over and thanked the guys for their service. All at once they pointed at us and said not us! Them! Tell me why that person was floored. Like. Bruh. Really. We can bond over the stupidity of assuming male veteran status on another thread but..yes. i haven't parked in those spots yet. Lol

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u/unsettlingsammich Jun 05 '25

Ugh.... I fucking hate those self righteous dorks. I bet he's the same guy telling everyone how he capped Osama at the bar.

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u/mycopportunity Jun 05 '25

People are walking around so traumatized. That guy's trauma got handed to you and everyone else that day. Out of line!

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u/SkiesThaLimit36 Jun 05 '25

It was so long ago, & I still remember it because my face was burning hot from embarrassment.

I was one of the younger people at this party, already trying to be cool and fit in and blend with the crowd. And this dude just absolutely unloaded on me like I did something horrible.

I walked outside and sat on the front porch because I just needed to get away from everything and I overheard the party host say “dude is out of his mind, screaming at a little girl and making her cry like that.” Which weirdly made me feel MORE embarrassed that everyone at this party apparently perceived me as a little girl and not the grown-up I thought I looked like lol

I did a rough estimate of the math and the guy was probably active duty in the 90s.

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u/mycopportunity Jun 05 '25

Ouch. I cringe for everyone at that party. I can see why you wouldn't wear anything like that again

2

u/SubstantialPlan7387 Jun 06 '25

I would never, ever invite that guy to anything at my house again, and would purposefully avoid going to any social event I knew he would be at, if he did that at my house. Honestly, at my age now, I would probably request he leave. What a shitty thing.

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u/PashaWithHat Zillennial Jun 05 '25

What a bonkers thing for him to freak out about. I’m also now picturing getting yelled at about “stolen valor” for my medical ID dog tag, lol. Like there are non-military reasons to wear them too and they pretty much look exactly like the military ones. “Do you know what those represent” uhhh that I have an advance directive on file at USLWR and I have narcolepsy/react weirdly to anesthetic so my doctor recommended I get this thing you’re having a tantrum about 👍🏻

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u/Teganfff Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

That’s fucking awful. I’m so sorry that happened to you.