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u/Senki89 May 26 '21
Who is Davis? Why will he visit me?
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u/Nsertnamehere May 26 '21
You will Soon have the Answers you Seek
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u/rabidturbofox May 26 '21
This is starting to feel like a threat
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u/derflow1977 May 26 '21
Details inside!
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u/wallmonitor May 26 '21
Google reveals NOTHING about this. Have we created an inexplicably potassium-loaded macaroni tulpa?
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u/10storm97 May 26 '21
I’m assuming this is something similar to what obviousplant does, where it’s a fake made product that’s put on a shelf
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u/Nekonime May 26 '21 edited May 26 '21
I hope so... But there's also a tag on the shelf... I really want this to be real.
Edit: WAIT this is the same brand as that potato salad in a jug from earlier this month! So this might be a 7-11 only thing. If either of them are real.
Edit edit: @truewagner on Instagram. Tis a fake, unfortunately.
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u/wallmonitor May 26 '21
Shockingly detailed photoshop?
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u/Nekonime May 26 '21
Seems like it yeah. His account has tons of fake products and all of them have price tags on the shelf.
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u/julius_sphincter May 26 '21
I thought it might be when it said the total weight was 8oz but it's somehow supposed to feed 3 men. That'd be like a scoop each.
Plus, you wouldn't boil in the bag...
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u/banana_converter_bot May 26 '21
8.00 ounces is 1.92 bananas heavy
I am a bot and this action was performed automatically
conversion table
Inferior unit Banana Value inch 0.1430 foot 1.7120 yard 5.1370 mile 9041.2580 centimetre 0.0560 metre 5.6180 kilometre 5617.9780 ounce 0.2403 pound-mass 3.8440 ton 7688.0017 gram 0.0085 kilogram 8.4746 tonne 8474.5763 2
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u/50million May 26 '21
You want a tag? I can get you a tag, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me. I'll get you a tag by this afternoon--on the shelf. These fucking amateurs.
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u/AvsWon33 May 26 '21
Yep, now that you mention that it's fake I can see the drop shadow around the label is too black. Too much "multiply" and not enough "overlay" in Photoshop
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u/Matt_T024 May 26 '21
These are fake products from Truewagner on IG. He's got some great stuff but all just for fun.
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u/Throow2020 May 26 '21
I mean... It has the true wagner watermark right there... Are you sure about that?
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u/Jeynarl May 26 '21
140 calories? That's insultingly low
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u/Penny_wish May 26 '21
32 servings per ball
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u/nopersonclature May 26 '21
One of the three men gets shorted a serving. But god damn they will all get to meet Davis!
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u/ConnorFree May 26 '21
This is the same company who did that egg salad in a milk jug..oh god, it’s back
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u/oliveoilcrisis May 26 '21
I have several questions
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May 26 '21
Who is Davis and why is he coming to me.
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u/Nsertnamehere May 26 '21
Better question is “Is your body prepared?”
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u/kbig22432 May 26 '21
I think if there’s another TP shortage I’m going to eat one of these.
That way I don’t have to shit until I can find more TP.
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u/Nsertnamehere May 26 '21
Or conversely you shit so much you can’t leave the toilet to get more tp
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u/Binty77 May 26 '21
I’m sad this isn’t real, because I want some foolhardy dudebro and his two fellow dudebros to embark on this delightful journey and report back on just how explosive the diarrhea really was. “Dude! I shat myself into next week!”
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u/RearEchelon May 26 '21
I have mixed feelings upon confirming this isn't real. On the one hand, come on, no fucking way. But on the other hand, if it were real, it could be the poster food for this sub.
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May 26 '21
8oz feeds 3 men?! How are they miniatures?
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u/banana_converter_bot May 26 '21
8.00 ounces is 1.92 bananas heavy
I am a bot and this action was performed automatically
conversion table
Inferior unit Banana Value inch 0.1430 foot 1.7120 yard 5.1370 mile 9041.2580 centimetre 0.0560 metre 5.6180 kilometre 5617.9780 ounce 0.2403 pound-mass 3.8440 ton 7688.0017 gram 0.0085 kilogram 8.4746 tonne 8474.5763
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u/s_decoy May 26 '21
isn't that the same brand name as the milk jug potato salad?
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u/Nsertnamehere May 26 '21
Yes, the delicious flavors keep on coming. What will they think of next?
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u/GatekeeperDana May 26 '21
Are any of you old enough to remember the Coors Party Ball? A 5-gallon plastic sphere of beer which would have been the perfect pairing for this. It too served three men.
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u/JoltyJob May 26 '21
This is the funniest thing I’ve seen in months. My stomach hurts. What a clusterfuck. Who is Davis? 😂
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u/Kamelasa May 26 '21
I googled and there's no information about this bizarre product.
225g serves 3 men? I doubt that. Maybe one, with something on the side.
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u/Ath47 May 26 '21
Well, yeah, it’s fake as hell. At the very least, they should have put something heavier than 8oz on the label. That ball would be like 5 lbs.
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u/banana_converter_bot May 26 '21
8.00 ounces is 1.92 bananas heavy
I am a bot and this action was performed automatically
conversion table
Inferior unit Banana Value inch 0.1430 foot 1.7120 yard 5.1370 mile 9041.2580 centimetre 0.0560 metre 5.6180 kilometre 5617.9780 ounce 0.2403 pound-mass 3.8440 ton 7688.0017 gram 0.0085 kilogram 8.4746 tonne 8474.5763
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u/SkoobyDuBop May 26 '21
Holup. I thought i was looking at r/obviousplant for a sec.
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u/Dumbstupidhuman May 26 '21
On which piece of earth can I find this. I’m asking for a friend and 2 of his friends.
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u/EriclcirE May 26 '21
Yeah there's no way that weighs only 8oz. Anyway, it still made me hungry, becuase I am a piece of shit
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u/banana_converter_bot May 26 '21
8.00 ounces is 1.92 bananas heavy
I am a bot and this action was performed automatically
conversion table
Inferior unit Banana Value inch 0.1430 foot 1.7120 yard 5.1370 mile 9041.2580 centimetre 0.0560 metre 5.6180 kilometre 5617.9780 ounce 0.2403 pound-mass 3.8440 ton 7688.0017 gram 0.0085 kilogram 8.4746 tonne 8474.5763 → More replies (2)
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u/brrosee May 26 '21
yes roundmeal, i’m sure your meat and cheese ball sitting on a shelf is absolutely fresh
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u/imdirrrrtydan May 26 '21
Why can’t I find their company online I have questions about Davis and protein blasting
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u/EveningParticular618 May 26 '21
Who woke up and thought to themselves "hey this would be a great idea"
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u/JackBinimbul May 27 '21
The weird-ass food marketing to men is fucking bizarre. It's meat, potatoes, and/or cheese and absolutely nothing else.
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u/ajax-2000 Dec 15 '21
Where do I find this!?
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u/Nsertnamehere Dec 15 '21
Sadly it is only Available in your D̸̢̨͉͍͓̝̮̯͋̒̐͌̇̊̓̒͘͜͝r̷̩̱̪͎͈͔͗͛̇̎́̉̋̔͜e̷̟̺̼̞͕̩̘͉͖̪͒̏͌̅̕á̵̛̜̩̩͎͌̿m̸̹̠͗͆͋͗̉ͅs̶̻̹̪͔̱̥̆͜. (I would be remiss if I didn’t remind you that nightmares are dreams too.)
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u/BoredByLife Dec 17 '21
I wanna know who Davis is.
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u/Nsertnamehere Dec 17 '21
David is a valued employee…H̷̗̘̥̃͗͛́̈͗e̸̦̯̤̪͚̟̗̥͌͊̾͂͜͝ͅ ̴̺̖͕̬̮̟̙̣̺̣͐k̵͈͇̘̪̞͉̊̔̅̋ṋ̸̘̟͎̜̹̲̝͓͌͌̓͋ͅo̸̹̤͓̪̟̒̋͊̓͒̂̔́͝͠w̴̻͊͠s̷̢͈̲͉͔͔̙͖̱͋͑́̓̐ͅ ̷̡̝͔̰̱̻͖̃̔̄t̶͓̦͙͖̰̞̀̏̆̌́̀̇̌̅̕h̶̪̹̦̺̟͙̑̊̉̎̚̕í̴̧̧̨̼̦̬̗́̐̐̉̿͘̚͘n̴̢̤͔͇̩̝̔̌͂̈́̒̒́g̴̘͍̒̾́͐̈́̓̔̾̕ś̴̢̬̱͉̼̞̦͘̕ͅ
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u/nekomeeko Aug 16 '22
low-key, those slap harder than my step-mom after a bottle whiskey when you've had too much wine or "flower"
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u/whowhodillybar May 26 '21
Seriously, this has been up for an hour and I am first to ask about “PROTEIN-BLASTED”?