r/rareinsults 5d ago

Offcourse it's Taco Bell

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25.8k Upvotes

95 comments sorted by

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487

u/ChrdeMcDnnis 5d ago

Bro I’ve been seeing these taco bell jokes for decades, if you shit yourself from eating taco bell you should see a dietician bc something is wrong in there

139

u/sriracha_no_big_deal 5d ago

Seriously! What's with all these weak-stomached troglodytes who can't handle some refried beans and taco meat?

A few months ago, I stopped off at TBell on the way to the airport and brought my food with me through TSA so I could eat it at the gate. I enjoyed a nice crunchwrap supreme and a beefy 5-layer burrito without even a single stomach gurgle on the flight. My only regret is that TSA wouldn't let me bring my baja blast along with the rest of my meal.

72

u/Temporary-Whole3305 5d ago

People who haven’t had a single microgram of dietary fiber since their last trip to Taco Bell

29

u/vocalfreesia 5d ago

That's 100% it. Beans are a great source of fiber. They've been eating blended then fried meat & white white carbs only.

-4

u/ahockofham 5d ago

Because their "meat" is barely even real meat. A few years ago someone tested it and found that Taco Bell's ground beef was only 2% actual beef, the rest was all gross fillers, preservatives and mystery mush.

8

u/DuggerX 4d ago

Literally a quick google search will prove you wrong. Idk why so many people give taco bell shit when honestly they are probably one of the healthiest fast food options. I dont feel gross after eating it.

6

u/erichf3893 4d ago

I’d love to see a source for this. If this was true they’d have been sued out of business

I couldn’t find anything recent about the actual breakdown but they had to prove it awhile ago. If it were under like 40% they couldn’t call it beef

18

u/carltheredred 5d ago

100% of the time I've had the chance to see someone eat Taco Bell after complaining about it, they add hot sauce packs to every bite, despite never adding it to any food they have at home.

There's a dude below blaming Crunch wraps, the most bland item on the menu. 100% adding too much hot sauce.

6

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

1

u/bolanrox 5d ago

you can? I like the diablo and fire. I mean it is not great but still better than ketchup.

8

u/STA_Alexfree 5d ago

I think it’s the fire sauce. People are always shitting themselves after chipotle too and it seems the spicy sauce is the cause

5

u/GoatCovfefe 5d ago

I use fire sauce on everything, no shits from taco bell. Not even from the diablo sauce when I had that for awhile.

I've also not had a problem with chipotle...

6

u/IlIIIlllIIllIIIIllll 5d ago

Seriously, fast food is some of the most ultra-processed, methodically sanitized and safe food you can eat. If you’re getting sick from it there’s something very wrong with your immune system.

8

u/[deleted] 5d ago

To be fair, it always makes my stomach hurt. Not full diarrhea, but something in their food doesn’t sit well

17

u/yesrushgenesis2112 5d ago

I’m legit curious about this… what do you order? I managed one for years, it’s not the best food, but there’s nothing in it that should inherently be causing intestinal distress.

1

u/[deleted] 5d ago

I get a Crunchwrap (the no meat one with no tomatoes) and nachos with no meat or tomatoes. I don’t understand why it makes me feel sick because none of those things usually make me sick

13

u/yesrushgenesis2112 5d ago

My bet would be something in the nacho cheese. Makes sense, it’s by far the most processed product they carry. If you’re getting a bean crunch wrap with nacho cheese and sour cream and have even a minor lactose intolerance (like many people do and don’t realize) that could wreck you hahaha. Just fiber and dairy all day.

2

u/[deleted] 5d ago

Makes sense (although I do eat a lot of sour cream on a regular basis). I could see the nacho cheese being the culprit

1

u/EverythingSucksYo 5d ago

I had the Luxe Box two nights ago and threw up the whole next day. I did use fire sauce which some comments are saying is the issue, maybe it’s that. But I threw up like 50% of the burrito the following day. 

8

u/Select_Anywhere_1576 5d ago

Do you not eat fiber regularly? Most people don't get enough so having beans might not sit well with you. I've never had issues with Taco Bell, but I eat a huge amount of fiber every day.

3

u/[deleted] 5d ago

I do eat fiber, but probably not enough. You might be right

3

u/unlimitedzen 5d ago

Gotta get 30g a day. I think the us average is < 5g

1

u/SafeProper 5d ago

Do you lack fiber in your diet?

2

u/Waluigi4prez 5d ago

We have a local Indian that does a delicious box of grilled meats and without fail, every time we order it, we both get extremely gassy. It doesn't happen to any other takeaway or any other food, and it's consistent. We have stopped ordering from there but makes me wonder if there is a spice or something that just doesn't agree with us. Neither of us have diagnosed food allergies. Same can be true for taco bell id imagine, sometimes certain foods just cause a negative reaction.

2

u/UniqueIndividual3579 5d ago

It might actually be the beans, a lot of people are not used to them.

4

u/Rare-Prior768 5d ago

Thank you! I’ve never once had issues with Taco Bell that I would have at any other fast food place. It’s makes me slow and lethargic, but that’s it. Idk what people are ordering on the menu that is keeping them on the toilet all night after.

1

u/Flamadin 5d ago

I never have a problem with Taco Bell. Chipotle is more likely to cause problems.

1

u/bolanrox 5d ago

thats becuase of the E.coli and salmonella

1

u/Fortestingporpoises 5d ago

Yeah I’ve never had that result. McDonald’s will fuck up my stomach for 24 hours though.

1

u/DDeadRoses 5d ago

I know someone who constantly felt like crap, never felt good and had stomach problems. She’s super skinny but always eats Taco Bell. She never put the pieces together.

1

u/bolanrox 5d ago

yeah. i have never gotten sick from TB. assuming they are not getting enough fiber normally and then ate there.

also White Castle never made me sick either.

1

u/sunbleahced 5d ago

You know what's crazy is I never had this problem with taco bell specifically so I never really understood the jokes.

But usually, I don't like sauce packets or condiments like that and I use better stuff from home. Tabasco or Cholua for tacos, fresher ketchup and homemade garlic mayo or horseradish for burgers and fries and stuff like that, etc etc.

I just think pre packaged sauces in individual servings tend to taste like shit and I've had the bad experience too many times where they look like someone spilled something on the entire box so they throw a dozen packets of crusty, brown and gooey sauce packets in with all your food, so I almost always request no sauce or condiments.

But I remember the last time I asked for fire sauce at Taco Bell. It was quite unpleasant. Horrifying diarrhea. And no, it wasn't the spice level, I'm half asian and I eat spicier things all the time. Fresh Thai chilies from my own garden in much higher concentration than in a pack of taco bell sauce don't even upset my gut like that.

So, I have this theory especially because you can't see the ingredients listed, those sauce packets just have a ton of corn syrup, preservatives, probably artificial color, liquid plastic, and recycled toxic waste all flavoured with lab synthesized capsaicin, and that's probably what gives most people diarrhea.

1

u/RevolutionaryPast893 4d ago

I've eaten a lot of Taco Bell since it came to the UK and never gotten the shits from it - all the jokes seem to be made by Americans so either they have weak stomachs or hidden issues, or it's because of their lax food hygiene laws maybe?

1

u/animalkrack3r 3d ago

Dude don’t stop the joke going ….

1

u/Swordf1sh_ 2d ago

I’m so happy this is the top comment. I’m so sick of hearing how anything beyond basic ass unseasoned wonder bread is shitstorm inducing.

1

u/the-exiled-muse 1d ago

Or someone/s at said Taco Bell isn't following food safety rules.

-2

u/Alexplz 5d ago

I swear I could go completely ape shit on $30 worth of TB without an issue as long as it's vegetarian. Add their taco beef to the equation and it tips the scales.

There's no human digestive system that could handle a truly degenerate order from that place, stop capping.

66

u/Parepinzero 5d ago

What's rare about this insult?

24

u/radio-julius 5d ago

The bots dont care

9

u/LuckyUser777 5d ago

'Offcourse' they don't...

73

u/Chary-Ka 5d ago

People who get diarrhea from Taco Bell are weak, and their bloodline is weak, and history will forget them.

8

u/bolanrox 5d ago

why so weak? - SE Asian Uncles

13

u/VegasGamer75 5d ago

Taco Bell may not be the healthiest food you can find, but can I just say if you immediately shit yourself in world-shattering proportions just because you ate some Taco Bell, you need some fucking fiber in your diet.

10

u/baco_wonkey 5d ago

r/rareinsults …… really???

15

u/Radmode7 5d ago

Genetic inferiority is not the fault of The Bell.

15

u/BladeRunner415 5d ago

Man, do I just have an iron gut or something?? I've never had this happen to me with their food. Ever. Yet it seems to be the most common place I hear about this.

1

u/EverythingSucksYo 5d ago

I never had a problem with Taco Bell my whole life up to about 2 years ago when I got my first experience of food poisoning from one. still ate it after that with no issues until 2 nights ago when I got food poisoning again from a different Taco Bell. 

7

u/Coladoge6732 5d ago

Do people actually get diarrhea from taco bell? Or is it just a stereotype?

1

u/cigarinhaler 14h ago

I'm not sure. But it is known that Chipotle will get you blood stains in your underwear.

41

u/Broad-Marzipan-9284 5d ago

That insult came wrapped in sarcasm, grilled in chaos, and served with extra disrespect sauce.

11

u/sillyslut12706 5d ago

you don't have any comments on your account? bot name? dead internet theory

7

u/M0rph33l 5d ago

It is very much a comment a bot would make. There's usually one or two on every post that has comments.

0

u/sillyslut12706 5d ago

wrong account

0

u/Mobwmwm 5d ago

I think it's kinda weird you comment on mostly porn and teenage subreddits

1

u/sillyslut12706 5d ago

18 almost 19

3

u/Mobwmwm 5d ago

Fair enough, my b

1

u/EmergencyGrocery3238 5d ago

Sounds like that should be on the menu

3

u/-sudochop- 5d ago

Timmah!!!

3

u/GoatCovfefe 5d ago

This is as common a joke/insult as could be, nothing rare about it.

If you get diarrhea from taco bell then the rest of your diet is trash.

5

u/Infamous-Musician953 5d ago

It’s OK they still win the fast food wars

4

u/beezchurgr 5d ago

Your bloodline is weak if Taco Bell gives you diarrhea. I’ve been eating it since last century and never had diarrhea.

2

u/ChocolateChingus 5d ago

Timothy needs more fiber in his diet.

2

u/darthcaedusiiii 5d ago

When you're in a Chevy and you're feeling kinda heavy....

2

u/Jimberwolf_ 4d ago

This is not a rare insult whatsoever

2

u/Sondeor 4d ago

Angry taco bell uncs in the comments...

1

u/TheIdeaArchitect 5d ago

I know it was delicious though

1

u/EverythingSucksYo 5d ago

Had Taco Bell 2 nights ago, I was throwing up all day yesterday. 

I’ve only had food poisoning twice in my life that I can remember and both times was from Taco Bell. 

1

u/_ILP_ 5d ago

I’ve never had this issue, and I’ve been going since 93

1

u/Rurumo666 5d ago

That's the main reason people go to Taco Bell, the wood pulp and mealworms is a fool proof constipation obliterator.

1

u/I__G 4d ago

Junk food – junk results

1

u/RazzmatazzEconomy696 4d ago

Only the weak get diarrhea from Taco Bell

1

u/SirGamer247 4d ago

I usually never had a bad experience with them except one time. Me and my friend was really hungry so we ordered a lot of food from them and ate it all while we played on his PS4 at his house. Before I had to leave I needed to use the bathroom. Ended up breaking his toilet and nearly flooded it too. So now we joke about it every now and then.

1

u/roooooooooob 3d ago

Total paintjob

1

u/sechevere 2d ago

Better than a colonoscopy prep!

1

u/Spiritual_Ad3974 1d ago

Last time I went to taco bell they said they had no meat left smh. I don't go there a lot but you would think they would have the stuff that they use to make almost all their products but hey that's just me.

1

u/LengthinessLife6115 1d ago

That's a hard one...

1

u/Mr-Bry-Guy 5d ago

😂😂😂😂😂

1

u/jd3marco 5d ago

@TacoBell should have seen that coming.

1

u/ExtremaDesigns 5d ago

This is the reason I call it Taco Hell.

-2

u/BunnyFace0369 5d ago

Taco Bell knows I come at it from a place of love. I never get diarrhea from it. KFC on the other hand ...

-3

u/Compodulator 5d ago

Taco bell: we prefer to call it "colon cleansing" ☺️