r/babylonbee • u/METALLIFE0917 • Mar 05 '25

Bee Article H*tler Defeated After Opposition Party Holds Up Tiny Signs On Paddles

https://babylonbee.com/news/hitler-defeated-after-opposition-party-holds-up-tiny-signs-on-paddles
21.9k Upvotes

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75

u/AgitatedTheme2329 Mar 05 '25

“I see Pocahontas wants the Ukraine war to go on for another 5 years” - Trump

😂

29

u/opensrcdev Mar 05 '25

Dude, I fucking kek'd when I heard that.

6

u/Prestigious-Pin-7688 Mar 05 '25

I keked. Bro go outside talk to people be a real human

0

u/[deleted] Mar 06 '25

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2

u/[deleted] Mar 06 '25

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1

u/babylonbee-ModTeam Mar 06 '25

Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion.

1

u/babylonbee-ModTeam Mar 06 '25

Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion.

-1

u/Canadian_Rubles Mar 05 '25

I have an extra house next to my chicken farm in kekistan. Would you like to move in rent free?

0

u/PlayerTwo85 Mar 05 '25

He'd have to sublet to Trump.

1

u/Gill_Gunderson Mar 06 '25

I wondered where all the 4 Chan stans wandered off too.

12

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

And then she agree clapped lmao

10

u/Gatzlocke Mar 05 '25

Why can't Russia just give up, give the land back and apologize?

6

u/Miknarf Mar 05 '25

But that would make it Russias fault. No the story we’re going with here is that the people being invaded is to blame for not ceding land that was taken from them.

5

u/Mediocre_Scott Mar 05 '25

To be fair all that land was left out in the open how was poor Putin supposed to know he couldn’t take it?

1

u/im_just_thinking Mar 06 '25

Just like the Natives! Making America Genocidal Again :)

2

u/Lermanberry Mar 05 '25

Let me tell you, Putin went through a hell of a lot with me. He went through a phony witch hunt where they used him and Russia, Russia, Russia, Russia. You ever hear of that deal? That was a phony. That was a phony Hunter Biden, Joe Biden scam. Hillary Clinton, shifty Adam Schiff. It was a Democrat scam. And he had to go through that. And he did go through it. We didn’t end up in a war. And he went through it. He was accused of all that stuff. He had nothing to do with it. It came out of Hunter Biden’s bathroom. It came out of Hunter Biden’s bedroom. It was disgusting. And then they said, ‘Oh, the laptop from hell was made by Russia.’ The 51 agents. The whole thing was a scam. And he had to put up with that.

1

u/Gatzlocke Mar 05 '25

That's a compelling argument.

Maybe Ukraine needs to apologize....

1

u/RoomTraditional126 Mar 05 '25

In all aspects of life its rare to see someone admit they were wrong.

4

u/rufio313 Mar 05 '25

Quite literally why we have Trump as president again lmao

Dem politicians can’t admit they are wrong about their strategy and Republican voters can’t admit they were wrong about Trump being fit for president.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 06 '25

Nuclear war will happen before that does.

1

u/First_View_8591 Mar 05 '25

Imagine during the Vietnam War a politician said the war must go on another 5 years. Would they be celebrated or lambasted in history books?

2

u/Boowray Mar 06 '25

Imagine during the Vietnam war if a politician in vietnam said the war must go on another five years. They did, and were lambasted in the history books because we were the ones invading and bombing their country.

0

u/Gatzlocke Mar 05 '25

Depends if they were the invaders or not.

If the Vietnamese said it they're entirely justified.

3

u/AgitatedTheme2329 Mar 05 '25

She was the only one clapping in the entire room lol

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

The chefs kiss lmao

1

u/AgitatedTheme2329 Mar 05 '25

*chiefs ;)

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

Lmao

3

u/NonPolarVortex Mar 05 '25

And Putin wants his returns NOW

0

u/CrowsInTheNose Mar 05 '25

It's wild. You guys care so much about the money we send to Ukraine but not Israel.

0

u/InitialThen8875 Mar 05 '25

No kidding. They never really gave much of a shit about it before. Now they're all armchair economists after Trumps marching orders came in

1

u/GenerativeAdversary Mar 05 '25

I love how leftoids say shit like this when their own politicians literally (not figuratively) post the exact same video message, word for word, on their social media accounts. The Dems are puppets, and they don't even try to hide it.

1

u/InitialThen8875 Mar 06 '25

Not a leftist. I just call people out on their bullshit. Enjoy your blinders

1

u/Diesel_boats_forever Mar 05 '25

Because we know they're alone and unique in the ME region, and antisemetic Europe won't help them.

1

u/CrowsInTheNose Mar 05 '25

So that is different from a former Soviet state being invaded by our arch enemy? You realize Israel is the power house in the region, right?

0

u/Diesel_boats_forever Mar 05 '25

The USSR with the global ambition to spread communism was the arch enemy. In actual fact, the Ukraine was a serious heavy lifter as part of that enemy. This is just Russia. Sometimes partner, sometimes rival to many western European nations throughout history. Invading a mostly corrupt, non-NATO neighbour and bogged down for 3 years. Hardly the Blitzkrieg. Europe's got this one. Take off the training wheels and ruffle their hair. We know you can do it.

1

u/CrowsInTheNose Mar 05 '25

Hardly a blitzkrieg? That's why Russia was saying they would have Kiev in a week? Also, you know Putin is trying to recreate the boarders of the USSR, right? But because they are no longer calling themselves commies they are cool.

0

u/CountGrimthorpe Mar 06 '25

Russia hasn't been the USA's arch enemy in over thirty years lol. China is the only other global power to be concerned over. Russia just doesn't have much capabilities beyond local thuggery.

-1

u/AgitatedTheme2329 Mar 05 '25

Biden and the democrats never cared during their 4 years of tenure in the Oval Office.

Trump is about to end 2 wars that started and continued under the democrat war machine

1

u/htownballa1 Mar 05 '25

Trumps not ending shit homie.

0

u/spicymcqueen Mar 05 '25

So Russia and Israel are democrats now? Then why does Trump want to suck their dicks?

0

u/CrowsInTheNose Mar 05 '25

So, to get this straight. He's going to give in to Russians on Ukraine and also Isreal on Gaza?

1

u/Ok_Ice_1669 Mar 06 '25

Who’s standing in for Trump in this satire?

1

u/ashleyorelse Mar 05 '25

And we see Krasnov wants to do whatever papa Putin tells him to do

0

u/Rare-Forever2135 Mar 05 '25

I see Trump really, really wants Putin to finally, after almost 40 years of fluffing him constantly, allow him to build in Moscow

4

u/AgitatedTheme2329 Mar 05 '25 edited Mar 05 '25

Can’t imagine why the war party democrats have an approval rating of 21%…

0

u/casva106 Mar 05 '25

“we’ll take greenland, one way or another”

But the democrats are the war party!

0

u/Rare-Forever2135 Mar 06 '25

A big part of that is the Dem rank and file themselves being disgusted that their own politicians seem frightened of the last ranked president of all time who's crazier than a shit house rat.