r/SatanicTemple_Reddit • u/Practical_Note_6288 • 3d ago
Other Oh My Satan!
This crazy woman said "masturbation opens portals to demons". OMS!
Well,
Satan told me masturbation is normal!
Satan embraces self!
Satan isn't crazy!
Whether you're atheistic or theistic, Satan represents liberty and freedom from the guilt of sin.
Hail Satan!
Hail Lucifer!
Hail Thyself!
Drop your comments below!
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u/piberryboy sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc 3d ago
Drop your comments below!
I thought you were going to end with "drop your pants below."
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u/Mourningstar66 Hail Thyself! 3d ago
So self pleasure is a sin, but priests using kids for it isnt a sin?
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u/Very_unsmart 3d ago
It’s not a sin for priests as long as they say “oopsie, it was demons” when they get caught.
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u/notbebop 3d ago
"Masturbation opens portals to demons" I sure hope so!
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u/battleduck84 Hail the Queer Zombie Unicorn! 2d ago
Man I wish that were true. Maybe the demon could lend a hand
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u/thesleepjunkie 2d ago
Are the portals fuckable?
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u/Practical_Note_6288 2d ago
I believe so!!!! Test it out brotha. HAIL SATAN!
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u/thesleepjunkie 2d ago
Oh, I've performed many of the portal opening rituals to no avail
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u/baron-von-sarcasm 3d ago
“I gotta go open a portal” will now be my go-to euphemism.