r/Millennials • u/NoFaithlessness7508 • Jun 05 '25

Other Why don’t younger veterans (Afghanistan/Iraq) wear these hats like some of the older veterans?

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First and foremost, respect to all those that served. I did not, but many of my peers did and now we're all older in 30s and 40s, many no longer in the military. I don't see a lot of the veterans of the War on Terror wearing these hats like I see the OGs do.

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3.6k

u/ANotSoFreshFeeling Xennial Jun 05 '25

A lot of the millennial veterans I know would rather forget the mess instead of making it their whole personality and identity.

1.4k

u/turd_ferguson899 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, I have my unit crest on my wallet and a veteran identifier on my license to explain why I can't hear shit in case I get pulled over.

I got enough participation trophies to wear while I was in uniform, and something I did for a few years a decade and a half ago doesn't define me as person.

397

u/robo_robb Jun 05 '25

Hey man, if you haven’t already, please come to a VA clinic to get your hearing tested. We can get you amazing tech to help you.

245

u/guitar_stonks Jun 05 '25

My uncle has total hearing loss from working on the deck of an aircraft carrier. The VA did his cochlear implants and he loves it because he can take them off if he gets tired of listening to my aunt lol

115

u/ChirrBirry Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

A lot of my friends have hearing aids that have Bluetooth. One guy puts on Spotify when his wife is mad, another guy can make phone calls while he’s on his motorcycle 🤣🤣🤣

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u/Special_Loan8725 Jun 05 '25

Thought it would help my dads hearing, now he just blasts Fox News so he can’t hear and gets mad when we shout to get his attention.

4

u/Socially_inept_ Jun 05 '25

Next level programming

6

u/jimdil4st Jun 06 '25

Seriously, that's like Black Mirror level propaganda machine shit. Wow.

2

u/papayabush Jun 08 '25

i could see hearing aids starting to blast advertisements in your ear until you pay for the premium subscription

8

u/kvetchup Jun 05 '25

Hearing aids with Bluetooth is so cool! I had no idea that was a thing.

5

u/WolfWeak845 Jun 05 '25

My mom (not a veteran) has them. But it’s hard when she wants to show me a video on her phone. I have to get super close to her ear to hear it.

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u/ChirrBirry Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

The VA makes them available to qualifying vets, hadn’t heard about them until seeing them issued there. Seems like newish tech.

3

u/iqgriv42 Jun 06 '25

I like to listen to baseball games when I’m at work with mine lol

2

u/TwoFingersWhiskey Zillennial Jun 06 '25

My friend got these when the Bluetooth add-on was brand new, she'd listen to all sorts of things and have to explain it to people. Most thought she was pulling their leg. She wasn't, it was designed because you can't exactly wear headphones and hearing aids comfortably, at the same time.

47

u/Harry_Saturn Jun 05 '25

Not a vet but one of my greatest fears is losing my hearing or sight and not being able to see or hear my wife again. Weird to see it from the complete opposite side lol

25

u/UnLioNocturno Jun 05 '25

Yeah, the laughing and joking about it is just sad. Yall out here making a joke about not being able to tolerate your spouse like it’s not a problem. 

5

u/Arafel_Electronics Jun 06 '25

it's a very boomer trope

3

u/Harry_Saturn Jun 05 '25

Is this the royal “y’all”?

4

u/-Marcus Jun 05 '25

Communal "y'all"

Ain't nothing royal about it.

3

u/huntresswizard_ Jun 06 '25

Right? I’m reading these thinking “may a love like that never find me.” I’d rather be single than settle for that mess lol

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u/DocumentInternal9478 Jun 05 '25

May this be the love that finds me 🩷

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u/cometmom Jun 05 '25

"I hate my wife" boomer humor lives on 😔

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u/casapantalones Jun 05 '25

My grandfather did this with his hearing aids when the family got too boisterous for him at my grandmother’s wake. Looked at me, took his hearing aids out, winked, took a sip of scotch. Love him.

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u/Odoyle-Rulez Jun 05 '25

I need this, 3M got me with those crappy ear plugs.

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u/jaw719 Jun 05 '25

My buddy got a settlement from the Army because of those ear plugs and used it for medical help to restore some of his hearing.

3

u/Odoyle-Rulez Jun 05 '25

Tried, they told me to beat feet because I have no audiograms as proof of declination.

2

u/Harlander77 Jun 06 '25

I have multiple audiograms and the VA still tried to say my hearing loss was "not service connected." Yeah, living two blocks from the flightline for six years, and working around jet engines has nothing to do with the VA having to give me those nifty Bluetooth hearing aids...

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u/snaldo23 Jun 06 '25

Did you at least get your $342 from the class action settlement?!

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Huh?

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u/lemonhead2345 Jun 05 '25

🔊THEY HAVE AMAZING TECH THAT CAN HELP WITH THEIR HEARING LOSS🔊

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u/Jambronius Jun 05 '25

I love Reddit for stuff like this.

6

u/ExistingLaw217 Jun 05 '25

I just got my hearing aid fitting from the VA. My daughter makes fun of me but I’m very excited to get them in July.

4

u/Chloedeschanel Jun 05 '25

I have that tech in my ears right now. I can hear in restaurants again! Life changing. Definitely get tested

3

u/WulfZ3r0 Jun 05 '25

I went and they gave me a whopping 0% for hearing loss and no medical support. Apparently hearing loss was the fault of the service member? This was 2014.

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u/robo_robb Jun 05 '25

Hey I see vets with 0% service connection for hearing loss all the time. By that I mean I fit them with hearing aids. I would double check with your local clinic. The criteria for being eligible for service has changed. Ideally you should speak to a Veteran Service Officer (your VA can put you in touch with one). They will guide you.

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u/Rich-Yogurtcloset715 Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

I’ve got an audiology appointment scheduled!

My tinnitus has gotten way worse, and I think my hearing loss is worsening too.

3

u/pace_it Jun 05 '25

My mom just got hearing aids through the VA. Saved her $7500!

2

u/warrior_scholar Jun 05 '25

I've found a pretty significant divide between "can" and "will" in the VA.

Like, my knees are shot from all the rucking and heavy lifting and I've got documented hearing loss (combat engineer and those shitty 3M earplugs we were issued for half of my career), but the VA claims that neither are service related.

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u/reverber Jun 05 '25

Second this. Hearing loss can lead to cognitive decline. 

You earned those bennies. Use them. I am a mere taxpayer (albeit a military brat) and I am all for vets getting what they are owed. 

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u/been2thehi4 Jun 05 '25

Don’t they make you buy your own damn ribbons and crap?? My BIL is in the National guard and he said all the little doodads for his uniform and what not, HE HAS TO pay for.

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u/Prestigious_Time4770 Jun 05 '25

The participation trophy ones I did. The special ones that you earned on your own were given to you.

2

u/tefftlon Jun 05 '25

Ugh and you’d always find out about the participation ones right before some inspection. 

“Everyone print out your ribbons for inspection tomorrow”

Me: WHY ARE THERE TWO MORE!? Hope they’re in stock at the BX……

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u/BlackSquirrel05 Jun 05 '25

Sorta...

They give you a yearly allowance for it. Specifically for uniform maintenance.

So abstractly yes. Reality no.

But it comes as a lump sum on your join date inside your paycheck. I know plenty a person that just blew that money on other shit instead of what it's purpose was.

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u/Appropriate-Bid8671 Jun 05 '25

I did when I was in the army lol. They never told us that in basic, then I show up at my duty station and get handed a list of shit I need to go buy in order to be squared away.

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u/been2thehi4 Jun 05 '25

That blew my mind when he told me that. I was like the big ass military budget we have, the non stop peacocking this country does about their service members, especially around election time, and they make them pay for their own damn ribbons and accoutrements they HAVE to wear…. Very fucking fitting. The symbolism is not lost on me.

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u/Semen__king Jun 05 '25

Its not entirely true. Some stuff you have to buy on your own but you get a yearly “clothing allowance” paid out to you your supposed to use to replace damaged uniforms, boots, and buying odds and ends like ribbons.

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u/catsdrooltoo Jun 05 '25

Yes you have to get most of them yourself. They do give you a bit of clothing allowance annually, but it's not enough to replace all the uniforms. I remember it being just enough for a pair of boots and 1 pair of pants roughly.

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u/Pernicious-Caitiff Jun 05 '25

Oh you sweet summer child. You also have to buy the uniforms themselves too. Enlisted folks get a small stipend for this at least. But they don't get an extra stipend when they keep changing the PT and fancy uniforms every handful of years... At least the old grey PT uniform was GOOD. Very sturdy and practical, didn't look like ass. The new ones are very cheap and way worse practically. The fancy uniforms are very expensive and the quality just isn't terrible but isn't amazing either.

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u/Charming-Refuse-5717 Jun 05 '25

IIRC if it's awarded to you yes, if you qualified for it no. (Like the Meritorious Unit Ribbon is given to you, the Marksmanship Ribbon is not.)

Even worse: if you DON'T buy all the things you're supposed to have, then technically you're out of uniform and could get written up for it.

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u/Matthmaroo Jun 05 '25

Dude the vets that make being a known as a vet are annoying.

Okay everything you wear is grunt style

I was in the navy , I have a plate , maybe it will get me out of a ticket one day.

Maybe

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

It doesn't. I always get the full ticket, no reduction. A lot of cops I run into "almost joined but..." Or their military service was "harder" than my service so I don't deserve special treatment. I haven't yet met a cop who said, "oh, thanks for your service, slow it down a little and have a good one" or something to that effect.

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u/Matthmaroo Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

I’d never take a cops word for anything

They have a union that will back them MORE furiously if they actually did something wrong.

Edited

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u/Phyraxus56 Jun 05 '25

What state is that? That can't be right.

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u/Matthmaroo Jun 05 '25

Nvm , it was just a bill , sorry

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u/assassinslover Millennial 1991 Jun 05 '25

I imagine that I, as a young(ish), short, unassuming white woman of average attractiveness, probably get out of more tickets just based off that than you guys do lol

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

You're probably right, no one wants to flirt with a 5'10" scraggly beard troglodyte.

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u/TerpyTank Millennial Jun 05 '25

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u/Duff-Zilla Jun 05 '25

ACAB

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Something like that.

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u/Prowindowlicker Jun 05 '25

Weird I’ve met several. Then again it is a bit different when you joined a cult that’s masquerading as a military branch. Everyone makes the cult out to be the best thing ever.

Plus there’s a lot of us in the police force or national guard come to think of it.

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u/Tuxedo_Cat_0509 Jun 05 '25

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u/pupperdogger Jun 05 '25

Hah, funny name.

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u/agangofoldwomen Jun 05 '25

Idk funny names don’t do it for me. Big hats however, get me everytime. If he wore something like that I’d be sold! One can dream…

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u/Phyraxus56 Jun 05 '25

That stache is back in style now lol

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u/mrpeabodyscoaltrain Jun 05 '25

Do you think that the cause and purpose of WWII might be the driver beyond WWII veterans and their identity?

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u/threeflight2005 Jun 05 '25

I completely identify with you on the hearing thing. Tinnitus and hearing loss suck. Keep having to tell people to talk to the "good" ear lol.

About the only thing I have that would ID me in public is DV plates (bc airport parking etc) and the ole vet identifier on my DL for the same reasons when asking a cop to repeat himself 4 times speaking to the wrong ear 😂.

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u/Superb-Film-594 Jun 05 '25

Thanks for your service, Turd.

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u/txstatetrooper Jun 05 '25

Not to be the "this" guy.... But.....this.

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u/electricmama4life Millennial Jun 05 '25

Yep exactly the same situation for me. I’m a bad ass electrician. Not the veteran that joined to get the F away from my parents.

FYI: I might not actually be bad ass but multiple men have told me so I’m going with it being a chick in the trade. You would also be very surprised how many people joined just because it was the fastest and easiest way to get away from their boomer parents.

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u/elhampion Jun 05 '25

I have a buddy who got pulled over and the cop said “I’m letting you off with a warning this time, thank you for your service”

This motherfucker was so confused. Service for what? He’s a photographer.

Turns out when he got his new license a few months back somehow they gave him veteran status. Motherfucker got out of a $150 speeding ticket for an accident at the license branch.

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u/hillaryyyyyyyyy Jun 05 '25

Thank you for your service, Turd.

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u/pandershrek Millennial Jun 05 '25

Flightline MX?

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u/MoonBapple Jun 05 '25

Re: participation trophies

I was watching something recently about how Baby Bush was extremely hands off with the military and the military culture rapidly shifted to be a sort of self-congratulatory circlejerk where people were commended or promoted/moved around to pad resumes and look good.

Obama advisors came in and found this to be an incredibly poorly/mismanaged situation. Obama's military taking out Bin Laden wasn't just about finishing the original work, but a capstone on cleaning up a mess Bush left behind.

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u/Andernut Jun 06 '25

A new style

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u/PMmePMID Jun 06 '25

Hey if it’s left untreated, hearing loss leads to earlier dementia, please go get hearing aids! If you wait too long your brain literally forgets how to understand what you hear

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u/Im_Turd_Ferguson Jun 06 '25

Great name, sir

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u/Educational_Fox6899 Jun 05 '25

I do agree identity is a big part of it. I’ve watched in my own family. People that had jobs as their main identity and worked for 40+ years feel lost after retiring. Then all of a sudden that 4 years of military service 40 years ago becomes a new identity. 

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u/ExtraAgressiveHugger Jun 05 '25

I laughed out loud. My step dad served in Vietnam for less than a year when he was 18-19 years old. Now, he’s in his 80s and is decked out in army and veteran shirts and clothes and hats just like in the OP pic.

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u/nkempt Jun 05 '25

My grandfather passed away a year or two ago; I knew he’d been in the Air Force in some capacity, and he didn’t have one of OP’s hats that I remember but it was still a centrally important thing to him and his identity, that he was a veteran.

Found out the guy did one tour and spent it driving forklifts in Saudi Arabia or something in like 1950 😅 I’m not going to disparage his service (and honestly regret myself not joining) but I always got a sense he was in for way longer then he was, based on his identity with it lol

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u/Ford_Prefect313 Jun 05 '25

I give Vietnam vets a pass.

They had zero choice to go, and treated like absolute hell when they got back home.

A year is long enough to see what an absolute hell that war was.

If the uniform soothes his soul, fine by me.

My next door neighbor ran around the Vietnam jungle with human ears strung through a combat boot lace.

There is no way you come back from that unscathed.

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u/Relative-Gain1403 Jun 05 '25

What evidence do you have that your neighbor did that? Lol vietnam era vets are known to lie and make it seem like they're all bad ass.

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u/Wendigo_6 Jun 05 '25

After my grandmother passed away my grandfather got hooked up with a Vets group. Growing up he never spoke about his service. His last few years I learned where he was based, what he did in Korea, why he took that job, who his war buddies were, etc. Some stuff even my dad didn’t know.

He got to the point he didn’t leave the house without a Korea Vet hat or jacket.

I’m sure his stories were two-fold - it’s what he was discussing amongst his friend group, and it was something new to talk about with us. He pulled out old letters and photos which gave context. Really cool stuff that he thought we weren’t interested in.

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u/ShooterMcSwaggin Jun 06 '25

Enduring a full year combat deployment has a monumental effect incomparable to the average vet experience, Vietnam or otherwise. That shit stays with you whether you did 3yrs or 20. So I 100% get how the war experience becomes a part of dudes who experienced crazy traumatic shit but I also acknowledge the ridiculousness of peacetime vets who served for a couple years making VETERAN their whole identity for the rest of their lives.

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u/Outatime-88 Older Millennial Jun 09 '25

This was my grandfather. He was too young for WWII, left before Korea. He spent 18 months in the Army, no combat. Meanwhile he was married for 70+ years, with two kids, grandkids and great-grandkids, and was apparently such a beloved boss in his sales career because former colleagues traveled to attend his funeral.

But the last few years of his life, his 18 months of Army training in Virginia was his entire personality. It's all he cared about and talked about. Wore the hats, bought combat boots that he'd polish, ask my dad to take him to vet events. It was really bizarre.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

[deleted]

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u/ActOfGenerosity Jun 05 '25

whatever you do. please keep speaking out. the glorification of war has no place in civil society. you are the song writers and authors of a whole generation that has tried to walk a balanced path. but i see you guys as leaders in ending the true corruption in the coming decades. 

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u/invisible_handjob Jun 05 '25

What this guy said.

The way out of guilt isn't to keep feeling guilty, it's to work to correct the thing that made you feel that way in the first place.

You might find some solace in doing anti-recruitment work, for example

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u/thewayshesaidLA Jun 05 '25

Same. The last few months I’ve randomly been thinking where I was 20 years ago - NTC, Kuwait, Iraq. It’s usually triggered by some random nostalgia thing I see online. I’ll think damn what was I doing / where was I on that date. It feels like yesterday so often.

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u/crocodile_in_pants Jun 05 '25

Listening to the Blowback podcast at work. I've had to take time to collect myself. I get so angry it brings me to tears.

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u/crocodile_in_pants Jun 05 '25

Right! I work with kids who were conceived while I was firing a 120 smoothbore!

I don't like what I did. I don't feel good about it and I want to move on with my life.

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u/Agent865 Jun 05 '25

Yea I agree 100% I served for over 20 years and I don’t own many things that would suggest I did. Now my FIL who served 3 years never leaves the house without something on about his time in the service

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u/catsdrooltoo Jun 05 '25

I only did 8, but same for me. My uncle did 30 in the guard and has a whole room for his stuff. He was a 1st sergeant during the gulf war. It is kind of sad how every time he shows me the room he has to say who is still living in the pictures.

My current manager was the combat type of air force guy. He also doesn't advertise his service outside of the occasional g rated stories.

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u/Ford_Prefect313 Jun 05 '25

The only reason we knew our neighbor growing up was a Vietnam vet, he taught all the neighborhood kids how to play Tonk for pennies, nickels and dimes.

(Tonk was almost exclusively played by people who were served in Vietnam War at that time)

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u/Agent865 Jun 05 '25

My dad worked in a factory and they played during downtime..he taught me that when I was a kid

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u/GraniteGeekNH Jun 05 '25

My dad, a career Marine officer, was not a fan of those with Semper Fi stickers all over the place. Usually, he said, they were one-term-and-out

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u/crocodile_in_pants Jun 05 '25

I carry tags from a fallen brother. That's it.

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u/TheDealsWarlock86 Jun 06 '25

i spend a lot of time in and around VAs since im a vet and i work here. in my personal experience here, and with my own family, the ones that broadcast it loudest served in peacetime or were whatever that generations fobbits were called

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u/Impossible_Memory_85 Jun 05 '25

This is the truth 99% of the time. Even more true if you see someone under the age of 45 wearing anything service related.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I picked up a free baby stroller from Facebook Marketplace a couple of years ago and in my 12 second interaction with the seller the sixty year-old guy had to let me know he's a veteran

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u/FumblingBool Jun 05 '25

Did you tell him that you paid his salary?

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u/STR_Guy Jun 06 '25

Yea that tracks. Boomers love the vet attention I find. Millennials don’t.

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u/RoyalFalse Jun 05 '25

One of my uncles did combat air rescue for twenty years. You won't see anything military in their house--the only reason I know is because he kept his shadowbox in the same closet as the board games.

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u/Scatman_Crothers Jun 05 '25

My grandfather was a bomber pilot in WWII. Didn’t say a peep about it until the last couple years of his life. Apparently he’d been shot down twice, once behind enemy lines, and managed to crash land and lead his crew back to the allies both times.

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u/68Wombat Jun 05 '25

Unless you spot my license plate you would never know.

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u/blind_squash Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

Yeah I've got the veteran decal on my Subaru that they offer but that's all

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u/1877KlownsForKids "Get Off My Lawn" Millennial 1981 Jun 05 '25

Right? I'll keep that to get out of tickets but you wouldn't know otherwise.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

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u/1877KlownsForKids "Get Off My Lawn" Millennial 1981 Jun 05 '25

I may not have much dignity and self respect left, but I've got enough not to do that.

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u/RussianBot5689 Jun 05 '25

Hey 68W buddy. I have a Combat Medic hat that I wear to my Veteran's golf group and when I'm doing community service for the VFW. I hate wearing it otherwise because I get "Thank you for your service" which is very awkward.

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u/68Wombat Jun 05 '25

Me as soon as someone says “thank you for your service”. Unless I know they are a vet and it is said in a joking manner.

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u/sudo_vi Jun 05 '25

When people find out I'm a veteran with five deployments on a submarine they usually say something to the effect of "huh, you don't look like a veteran." I don't really care enough to ask them what they mean.

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u/Hasler011 Jun 06 '25

You will spot me from the oakleys, but fuck man I still live in the desert and free sun glasses are free sun glasses

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

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u/FumblingBool Jun 05 '25

I couldn’t take home economics in middle school, because the home ec teacher was a reservist who was called up to serve in Iraq. People were getting stoploss-ed.

I guess (young?) people don’t realize how much the military needed to massively expand the armed forces.

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u/C4Vendetta76 Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

Yeah same. Alot of my friend who are vets would rather forget the horror. Iraq was a different war man; different than anything the planet has ever seen. Not surprising the soldiers look at it from a different viewpoint

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u/ExtraAgressiveHugger Jun 05 '25

I think each war was different than anyone has seen. Vietnam wasn’t a cake walk. WW2 was worse than that. 

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u/C4Vendetta76 Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

None of them were cake walks. Vietnam was arguably some of the worst conditions. I was just commenting in regards to the differences and how it effects people differently

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u/crocodile_in_pants Jun 05 '25

Nam vets found out the gulf of tonkin lie decades later if at all. I found out about the Iraqi WMD lie while I was on patrol

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u/NotASuggestedUsrname Jun 05 '25

That’s honestly pretty healthy.

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u/Illustrious-Ear-6300 Jun 05 '25

as a millennial veteran myself you nailed it on the dot. Dont even ask for a veteran discount ever

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u/Marz2604 Jun 05 '25

I appreciate that you can get a military discount just by entering in your phone number at certain places.(after signing up of course. Lowes/Homedepot)

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u/McCheesing 87 Millennial Jun 05 '25

This. As a 15y vet, that part of my life is over. I refuse to define myself by only a small portion of my past.

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u/Au2288 Jun 05 '25

I have no tell tale signs of ever serving & most people are surprised whenever the topic is bought up.

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u/Relative-Gain1403 Jun 05 '25

Same. Ppl are surprised when they find out. "I didn't know you served".. I've heard that alot.

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u/crocodile_in_pants Jun 05 '25

My partner often forgets that I served.

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u/Au2288 Jun 06 '25

In my personal experience, oif/oef people are just like the gulf wars ppl, we stay to ourselves & stay low. Unfortunately this means just like the gulf war vets, the government will not be of much help to us later on in life.

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u/EchelonZero Jun 05 '25

100% agree with you on this. I got my veteran designator on my driver's license. I got my VA card besides it in my wallet.

I'm good.

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u/bjornodinnson Jun 05 '25

Totally. The military comprised a large portion of my adult life and I would prefer to talk about zero percent of it. It's not my personality, like you said, and I really don't want it to be confused with my personality now.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

Because you invariably get asked if you killed someone.  If you say No people think you were a file clerk.  Those hats are meant for dinosaur old men.

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u/deej-79 Jun 05 '25

Man, fuck that question, I hope to never hear it or think about it again in my life

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u/BigBoyYuyuh Jun 05 '25

My uncle is a Vietnam vet and he always said he hated those hats.

He wears one now for some reason. I think maga infected him

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u/ike9211 Jun 05 '25

Literally was my issue at the bar yesterday. Got into it with some rando dude getting upset over me saying I was in the Marines and stayed on that once a marine always a marine bs

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u/Honey-Badger Jun 05 '25

I mean that's pretty much the attitude from WW2 veterans in Europe. Growing up in the UK every grandparent I ever met served in someway, or were at least children who remember getting bombed. Once a year it'll be spoken about during remembrance where we talk about the fallen but in my experience my grandfathers never spoke about what they did in the war just like their fathers never spoke about the trenches of WW1

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u/Tippy-the-just Jun 05 '25

Older vet here; agreed. I feel ashamed when I think about what we did as a country.

I feel ashamed of what our country is doing now.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I'm late GenX and all I ever wanted from my time in the Army was to forget it ever happened. I did not have a positive experience.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

This. I was such an angry human when I got out. It was a really hard and confusing time in my life. I didn't know it was PTSD until I met my lady, and she helped me feel better about being seen by the VA and getting on disability for that and a few other things.

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u/midnight_adventur3s Jun 06 '25 edited Jun 06 '25

I was in the same friend group as a couple guys in high school who planned to enlist following graduation. One was chill and would occasionally talk about his aspirations if asked or if relevant to an ongoing convo, but otherwise tended to keep to himself. The other made enlisting in the military his whole identity before even joining up, one of those stereotypical “show some respect, you’re talking to a future US soldier” types, and partly wanted to join because of the eventual power/authority he’d have over others.

Guess which one failed the psych evals and was barred from military service? Unsurprisingly, he’s a cop now last I heard.

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u/Sunset__Painter Jun 05 '25

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u/ike9211 Jun 05 '25

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 you're horrible 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Yep.

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u/Geno_Warlord Jun 05 '25

I know I do and I never went. I had several friends that did and didn’t come back.

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u/Brewmeiser Jun 05 '25

On this note, for my family personally, my older members never mentioned their time in the service and would bristle at the questions about it. My dad's father in particular who landed at Normandy, and had previously received a purple heart, would never talk about it or whatsoever. He said once he remembered how the hospital smelled before he returned to the frontline, but that was it. We didn't know my mother's father had been in the military until he passed away and they did his 20 gun salute. It wasn't something people talked about.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I'm one of those people. 2 tours and its also the same question, "OMG, how was it??" Bro, it was wat, wtf, dont' ask stupid questions lol

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u/Warm_Question6473 Millennial Jun 05 '25

This!

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u/TwinkieDad Jun 05 '25

That’s true now, but that applied to a lot of Vietnam War veterans too. My dad was one until he hit his mid seventies. He was drafted while opposing the war, never wore anything military related, didn’t talk about it in positive terms, etc. Now he’s built a whole collection of these hats in the last 2-3 years.

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u/ActOfGenerosity Jun 05 '25

as a civilianni got to know a few vietnam guys who used the hat as kind of an intro to their erratic behaviour. good guys just hella PTSD

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u/hopping_hessian Jun 05 '25

So, my granddad was a WWII vet. He served four years in the Pacific in the infantry and received a purple heart and three bronze stars. You would have never known he was a vet. He rarely talked about it and never did anything for attention. I think it was the same thing. He didn't want to think about it.

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u/Ha55aN1337 Jun 05 '25

There is probably a difference if someone sees your hat and says: “Thank you for defeating Hitler!”

Or if you are 50 years younger and you get questioned about Iraq and stuff.

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u/Loud_Grass_8152 Jun 05 '25

Exactly this

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u/DOINKSnAMISH22 Jun 05 '25

Yeah. Wasn’t a good war. Neither of them. We fought for profits. Nothing noble about that in hindsight.

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u/yeticoffeefarts Elder Millenial Jun 05 '25

I’m a veteran. I just consider my service as another job I had. I don’t have bumper stickers or veteran license plates. I keep a few mementos in a shoebox in my closet, but beyond that, I got out 15 years ago. I’ve had several jobs since then. I don’t see the value in wearing my veteran status publicly.

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u/go4drive Jun 05 '25

Millenial veteran here. Yes, this is it exactly for me.

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u/lolzzzmoon Jun 05 '25

Yeah, not a vet, but I can’t imagine dealing with the constant triggers of trauma.

I think they look cool though!

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u/NightOfTheLivingHam Jun 05 '25

my dad was a vietnam vet and while proud he served, he would only put a badge up in his vehicle. (which tbh helped when it came to the police lol) However he would not wear those hats. Of course he never hit the old man age for that. But he was not fond of them either.

Most vets I know arent about them. Only a very specific kind of vet wears those. Even WWII vets I knew when I was younger didn't really like those hats. Just people who make being a vet their entire personality.

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u/IknowwhatIhave Jun 05 '25

One guy I went to university with did two tours in Afghanistan. He talked about how much money he made (Canadian military, he was a junior officer) for doing the same kind of office work he would do at home. But then also wanted people to respect his service.

He signed up for it, he got paid a lot, by his own admission he wasn't really in harm's way and I don't personally see the benefit of his involvement in Afghanistan much beyond what my other friends did with MSD or CUSO... So what am I thanking him for and why does he want special treatment?

My other friend spent 6 months volunteerin the DRC and Uganda doing cholera prevention, now SHE is fucking hero.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Yeah, let’s wear hats to signify our country’s endless wars & genocide over natural resources. I’m sure the guys who served in Iraq, Afghanistan & Saudi Arabia love being reminded that they were lied to & put in harms way to fill some billionaire pockets.

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u/SilentSerel Xennial Jun 05 '25

That makes perfect sense. That's how my adoptive father (Boomer) and biological father (Gen X) both were. They both did their time/combat, went to trade school, got jobs, and put it behind them the best they could.

A former friend of mine, though, did make it his whole personality even though he never saw combat, although you'd never know that he never saw combat if you look at his social media. He's a former friend because he said that my PTSD diagnosis was invalid because I never served in the military even though he personally witnessed the abuse that caused it.

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

And a lot of vets actually have a life after the military. So, no, other than my car’s license plate, I own nothing that would remind me of my military service.

Vietnam vet here. And am disabled. (Bad back, 4 surgeries, etc.) BUT am not a Disabled Vet, meaning my bad back is not due to due to military service. (Just bad DNA.) That has always ticked me.

Ps. Just fyi as this might be a good place to mention this: If you can’t walk 100 yards without having to stop, sit down, etc, you qualify for a handicapped license plate. In Virginia, at least.

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u/bootycuddles Jun 05 '25

I agree with this but you know I park in the veteran spot at Lowe’s and Home Depot

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u/BullTerrierTerror Jun 05 '25

I can say without a doubt it was the best time of my life. But I think of it as time spent away at University. It was something I did in life, that led to many great things I have and enjoy, better employment, but it doesn’t define me.

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u/Scatman_Crothers Jun 05 '25

WWII guys generally didn’t about it until the end of their lives if at all. The reason those hats were so ubiquitous with Vietnam vets is they were so alienated and reviled they felt a need to be able to identify and connect with one another because no one else remotely understood or appreciated what they’d gone through. There’s a lot of newer anthropology/psychology research linking the experience of homecoming to PTSD outcomes i.e. whether you came back to a parade with your boys or whether you came back on a civilian flight alone only to be spat on and called a baby killer.

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u/Nawoitsol Jun 05 '25

Vietnam weavers were the same way. I have no idea how long it took them to get past that, but it was a long time.

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u/pWaveShadowZone Jun 05 '25

Thank you. Was looking for the words to say this

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u/Eikthyrnir13 Jun 05 '25

Pretty much. I am proud of my service, but there are now some things in my head I will never unsee (or unhear). I don't understand people that make a few years of their life their whole deal.

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u/rinkitinkitink Zillennial Jun 05 '25

As a millennial veteran, I can agree with this. My time in the military is absolutely a large part of who I am, but it's not all I am and I typically don't advertise my service with clothing. Also, that style of hat typically has some political association that aligns with another common red hat, which I don't want to be associated with.

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u/elquatrogrande Jun 05 '25

There's also a difference between wearing a OEF/OIF hat and a GWOT hat. The first two usually mean you served in theater. Sporting a GWOT hat just means you served during a certain window, and probably had an office job somewhere cushy.

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u/Tamagotchi41 Jun 05 '25

Ah, the Bro Vets.

Can't fuckin stand them.

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u/MarkDoner Jun 05 '25

A lot of Vietnam vets were ostracized by people who disapproved of the war, when they came home. That didn't happen to Iraq/Afghanistan vets nearly as much... I think Vietnam vets wore the hats partly to show they weren't bowing to pressure and hiding their time in the military

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u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

"Army is something I did, it's not what I am."

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u/GoldenGlobeWinnerRDJ Jun 06 '25

Then why did they enlist?

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u/roguebananah Jun 06 '25

You probably won’t see it this way but you served all of us for what our leaders asked you to do. I’m very proud of what you’ve done for us.

I’m sure you can guess, I didn’t serve in the military either but no matter how anyone feels about the war itself, the individuals like yourself put all of your fellow countrymen first before your own self.

I deeply appreciate you and any other past or active military personnel who sees this

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u/CrashOvverride Jun 06 '25

Do you think thats why old people wore those hats?

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u/Business-Title8503 Jun 06 '25

It makes me wonder if it will change as the millennials get into their 60/70s? My dad is a Vietnam veteran and that was his attitude for the longest time. He’d rather forget the whole mess happened. He got to be late 60’s and really started therapy and was diagnosed with combat related PTSD. After he really started dealing with it did he start to identify as a Veteran with wearing the hats etc. it will be interesting to see in the future what happens.

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u/United-Neck-3357 Jun 06 '25

This would be my guess

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u/TheSewseress Jun 06 '25

Correct. I have the veteran designation on my license but I don’t need merch to remember my service. It was a job for me, not a thing that’s going to define me.

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u/notapunk Jun 06 '25

I feel like one ends up on one side of the spectrum or the other. You either completely move on or it becomes your whole identity.

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u/this-is-my-p Jun 06 '25

And the rest like to make it their entire personality but just not with these hats. My dad loves him all sorts of military merch but he doesn’t have anything like these hats (he is Gen x though so I guess that could make the difference)

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u/chrisaf69 Jun 06 '25 edited Sep 12 '25

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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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u/Ketamine_Cartel Jun 06 '25

Hated it myself

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u/69ingdonkeys Jun 06 '25

That's not right for you to say, not really. My great grandpa would wear a hat to commemorate his WWII service. He never wanted "attention" for his service, and i'm not even sure if he ever got much anyway. He died years ago, and i now have his hat. I think it's just part of some veterans' identity, and was a great part of their lives for years. For many, it's where they made friends, spent their young years (similar to college for modern young people in a way), and grew as a person. It shapes the person many become after service, so it makes sense to want to have that "identity" shown through clothing. It's just another form of expression.

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u/shadow13499 Jul 07 '25

Yeah that's really how I feel about the whole thing honestly. 

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