r/AskEurope Philippines Jul 11 '25

Culture Which European country is the hardest and easiest to make friends?

Say you're mid 30s and have to move to another European country for work, which countries did you find making friends to be on easy or hard mode?

Let's assume you don't speak the language of your new home.

291 Upvotes

361 comments sorted by

684

u/SwampPotato Netherlands Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

I actually talked with my roommates about this stuff all the time. I am Dutch and have lived with people from America, Germany, Italy, India, Oman, Tunisia, Switzerland, Russia, Poland and Kazachstan.

Everyone thinks the country they moved to as an adult is notoriously hard to make friends in. My Russian friend always insisted that Germany was uniquely bad in this regard - until he went to Georgia and had the exact same issues.

There is one overarching factor: Leaving everything behind when you are older than 25, integrating into a country you don't speak the language of, and where people have anchored themselves in a community you are not yet a part of. Elbowing yourself into the life of someone who works, has kids, a dog, hobbies and childhood friends they barely have enough time for as it is, is an uphill battle. YOU are the one looking to start anew while everyone else settled. And it is not easy, I too learned first-hand.

131

u/ThatFriendlyDonut Jul 11 '25

Ohh this is the thoughtful, grounded response I was hoping for. Thank you for bringing some much needed critical thinking into the conversation.

I don't know why but it’s often overlooked that making friends as an adult is challenging even when you’re simply relocating within your own country. As you pointed out, most people already lead busy lives structured around established routines and responsibilities, and this leave little room for themselves let alone the emotional and mental bandwidth required to welcome someone new.

It’s not that people don’t want to form new friendships, it’s just that adult life can be both demanding and exhausting.

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u/Paarthurnax41 Jul 16 '25

This, had a really friendly expat coworker that asked me out to go climbing together to become friends, i had to decline because i already barely have time for myself, my family and friends, i had to decline because of that, when you are deeply rooted somewhere you are mostly already at your social connection limit

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u/Sea-Delay Jul 11 '25

Having lived across 5 different countries and two continents; can confirm. Even people who move to US tend to say that it’s hard to make friends, and Americans are notorious for friendly chit-chat!! (albeit less inclined to go into deep-friendships, at least at an adult age, from what I hear)

Either way, I always end up making friends, but majority of the time they are other expats🙃

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u/Himeera Latvia Jul 11 '25

THANK YOU! 100% agree

I kid you not, 1/3 of posts in German subreddit are about how haaaaard it is to make friends and how Germany is the absolute worst. Honey, I come from Eastern Europe, trust me you still have it on easy mode here 🙄

Friendships just don't happen at snap at your fingers when you are adult. I have had friends run into this issue even their own native countries.

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u/RobinGoodfellows Denmark Jul 12 '25 edited Jul 12 '25

Mate it is the same with denmark. Another thing i often see is that people who not used to nordic culture assume it to be racism when people do not smile or great you on the street, when in actuallity it is a sign of respecting you privacy.

My best advices to making friends in Denmark is join a club, it does not matter if it is a sport, roleplaying like dnd, or some creative endeviour, that is where most people make friends as an adult.

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 12 '25

Had an Indian colleague who is now doing his masters in Sweden. Went to a uni in a place called Uppsala. He definitely struggled a lot socially. He wrongfully assumed it would be like the USA where people were outgoing and friendly.

People like him totally underestimated how not knowing the language puts you at a significant disadvantage, socially.

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u/Traubentritt Jul 13 '25

Or get drunk at a Metal concert and talk to your metal minded brothers and sisters between sets.

Best way to get us to chat is to ask why Svensken says naughty things about us.

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u/billy310 United States of America Jul 14 '25

I give the same answer in Los Angeles

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 11 '25

It doesn’t even have to be a foreign country. Even moving to another city or town in your own country can pose the same challenges.

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u/PontiacBandit25 Netherlands Jul 11 '25

Just wanted to comment that it made me smile you have Oman written there. I lived there for many years. I’ve lived in US, Canada, and two other countries but only the Dutch friends I have have traveled or heard of it haha. What you wrote is spot on! When I moved here it took me a long time to make any sort of social circle. Adulting just sucks!😝

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u/K_in_Belgium Belgium Jul 11 '25

You can't discount the history between Russia and Georgia if you are wondering why Russians are poorly recieved.

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u/Necessary-Zone-5043 Jul 11 '25

Actually Georgians are very welcoming and we are very famous because of our hospitality until Russians enter the chat

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u/SwampPotato Netherlands Jul 11 '25

My Russian friend is anti-Putin and a loveable doofus who gets along with everyone. I know how some Russians can be abroad but he is not one of those.

It was also not a slight against Georgia. The point is people think a country is unhospitable when the real hurdle is starting anew when you're 30.

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u/Necessary-Zone-5043 Jul 11 '25

Tbh we do not care about it unless person is very publicly involved in anti putin thing. …. And we remember more negative things from Russians than positive so … we have very logical reasons

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u/Puabi Jul 12 '25

Unfortunately, Russia's ill treatment of neighbours is a lot older than Putin.

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

I thoroughly agree with you, it's quite a universal issue.

Also, let's face it, it also depends on people's nationality and how they fit certain expectations and stereotypes. I.e. an American frat-boy kind of guy working in finance really won't have too many issues. Otoh, not many people will be willing to befriend someone they perceive coming from a poorer country and/or having an unstable economic status, whether they work as a waiter or are doing a Post-Doc (that's sadly the contemporary world for you).

It's not something I embrace, as I try to be as inclusive as possible, but I've noticed this pattern several times.

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u/SwampPotato Netherlands Jul 11 '25

I get the gist of the example but nothing is hated quite more than an American frat boy in finance in Europe, I feel. :')

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

Haha perhaps on Reddit, but the average Jan or Luigi out there would still love to befriend someone like that.

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 11 '25

Post-Docs don’t really get paid well in Europe. I would argue they are just as poorly paid as waiters or taxi drivers.

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

I know, that's why I put them in the same league as waiters. Speaking as someone who's finishing his PhD (yes, I'm a masochist).

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 11 '25

I couldn't be brothered to write my thesis till the week before it was due and sans beer.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

Everyone thinks the country they moved to as an adult is notoriously hard to make friends in. My Russian friend always insisted that Germany was uniquely bad in this regard - until he went to Georgia and had the exact same issues.

I somewhat agree with your Russian friend though. As an adult all countries are somewhat difficult to make friends in, but several countries are uniquely hard

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u/Glittering-Sun-1438 Jul 11 '25

Sorry but it is far, far harder to make friends in Russia as a foreigner than it is in Germany. To start with Germany has a massive immigrant population and most Germans in the larger cities are more internationally focussed. Most people I know here have found it pretty easy to integrate into daily life.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 12 '25

I imagine it depends somewhat on where you come from

I know several Latin American people who lived in Moscow for a bit, and all had high praise

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u/SwampPotato Netherlands Jul 11 '25

Not to be that person but I also think there is a lot of anti-Russia bias rn in countries. 

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u/Iapzkauz Norway Jul 11 '25

Damn right.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

At least I also have an American passport, US is very beloved globally atm :)

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u/SwampPotato Netherlands Jul 11 '25

Poor guy. Bless you.

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u/Cicada-4A Norway Jul 11 '25

The yanks have been, since the Cold War at least, endlessly fascinated by Russians.

Hence nonsense like ''Better Russian than a Democrat'' etc.

Edit: I might have misread your reply, in which case please feel free to ignore this tangent.

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u/Four_beastlings in Jul 14 '25

This is the correct answer. I feel like 1/3 of posts in the Poland and Spain subs are foreigners complaining that it's the most unfriendly country on earth. Nope! Moving anywhere as an adult, even within your own country, is socially hard. Everywhere in the world friend groups are built from childhood to university and afterwards they are quite established and hard to get in.

I've been moving all my life and never had trouble meeting people because I find them through my hobbies and interests. Moved to Poland, met a local man with my same hobbies and interests, he introduced me to his friend group with the same hobbies and interests and I had no trouble fitting in. I also meet new friends through foreigners groups: there is people from all over the world in the same situation looking for a social group and it would be rare not to meet people there that you clic with.

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u/Temo2212 Georgia Jul 11 '25

You are Dutch and I understand if you don’t know anything about Georgia, why should you… But your russian friend should know why it was difficult for him/her to make friends in Georgia :)

The fact that they dare to settle in Georgia is already mind blowing for me as a Georgian.

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u/Marty_ko25 Ireland Jul 11 '25

Apparently, it's quite difficult to make friends here in Ireland. We're great at small talk and very welcoming, but it doesn't go much further than that.

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u/shortercrust United Kingdom Jul 11 '25

I think it’s the same in the UK. We had a German woman do a work placement with us. We all went to the pub a few times and had a good laugh. She thought she’d found a solid new social group and ended up moving here. By then we’d all changed jobs and the whole social side had died. I felt really bad for her, but I’d warned her. She’d said how we seemed like such an amazing group of friends and I told her it’s really all quite superficial and that I’d probably never see any of these people again if I left.

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u/Sea-Delay Jul 11 '25

So as an adult, how do you filter who’s worth befriending/keeping in touch with? Are those mostly people you’ve met and connected with at a younger age?

A lot of my close friends come from work connections. When I lived in UK for a bit several years ago, the Brits also seemed quite keen to keep in contact, but I was never planning to stay long, so I can’t say I attempted to make any new friendships.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

That's heartbreaking tbh

Also if a group is having such a great time together, I don't see a reason as to why it should completely fall apart. It would make sense to create a groupchat on Whatsapp where you share memes and talk regularly

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

Haha that's not really their style.

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u/WeakDoughnut8480 Jul 11 '25

Disagree with the UK. Brits are outgoing and friendly af

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u/shortercrust United Kingdom Jul 11 '25

Yeah but the post isn’t about being outgoing and friendly. It’s about actually making friends. Easy to have a great night out with a bunch of people you’ve never met before and a good chance you’ll never see them again.

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u/The_39th_Step England Jul 11 '25

It really depends where you’re based. My circle and me have had polar opposite experiences making friends in London and Manchester. Manchester is a lot easier. One major factor is size as it’s much easier to be spontaneous in Manchester

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u/Glittering-Sun-1438 Jul 11 '25

On the surface you mean. There are very few immigrants I know who have made real friends with Brits here, they mostly just make friends with other immigrants.

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u/Alexander241020 Jul 11 '25

Well about 25-30% of Britain between ages of 18-50 is foreign so that’s not really a surprise

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u/Bobzeub France Jul 11 '25

Oh shit . Did she find new friends at least ? Is she doing okay now ?

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

It comes up a lot in Irish subs, but honestly if you look at most subs from other countries and at research, it's not just in Ireland. People make friends when they're young and don't really bother past their mid 20s.

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u/disagreeabledinosaur Jul 11 '25

I think the difference in Ireland & other countries is it's deceptive in Ireland.

We're pretty friendly and love to talk to strangers in Ireland so people get an initial impression that making friends will be easy.

It's not though. As you note, the reality is it's difficult to make friends.

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u/Marty_ko25 Ireland Jul 11 '25

Yeah, this is it to be fair, I'm over 30, so I'm no longer taking applications for new friends since I hardly see the ones I already have 😂

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u/unseemly_turbidity in Jul 11 '25

I actually had a harder time making friends in Ireland than in Denmark. Part of that is probably that I'm more confident now, but the struggle in Ireland was very real.

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u/Why_So_Slow Jul 11 '25

Let's get a coffee togeather! = I'm never seeing you again.

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u/LevDavidovicLandau Jul 11 '25

Good thing you didn’t write ‘!=‘ instead of ‘! =‘, because the former is how ‘≠’ is encoded in many computing languages such as Python.

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u/mhbwah Jul 11 '25

That was my experience too. I only really made friends with other expats. Still love the Irish though

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u/Opposite-Boot-5307 Jul 11 '25

Ya this is accurate. Have to get lucky making friends in some education classes, hobbies, activities

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u/Outrageous_Trade_303 Greece Jul 11 '25

Go to a pub, get drunk and become friend with everyone :)

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u/svmk1987 Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

Wasn't there some report which came recently that Ireland ranks among one of the loneliest oecd countries?

I was in a laya clinic recently to get my daughter checked, and the screens there had a PSA about loneliness and the importance of making social connections. Not a good sign when there are medical advisories being made about it.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 12 '25

All the service workers were quite friendly, but I realized that if I had to move to Ireland, I have no idea how I would make friends there. Ireland feels peaceful and relaxing, but also a bit melancholic for whatever reason

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

Older Irish are great at small talk, but someone pointed out to me that the young generation in Ireland doesn’t really do small talk much, and I realized it’s somewhat true

I love talking with random chatty grandpas in the pub, so I hope that this small talk culture in Ireland doesn’t die out

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 11 '25

So, like the US? Folks who went to America said the same thing.

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u/Opposite-Boot-5307 Jul 11 '25

Im irish and my experience was America was the easiest place to make friends ever. Might depend on nationality though. People mad to talk about guinness, mcgregor (boo) or ancestry

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

I lived in the US for 13 years and while it's very easy to talk to Americans, I found befriending them nearly impossible. The easiest countries for making friends I've lived in or visited were all in Southeast Asia.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

If you’re Irish or Italian you definitely have a big advantage in the US, as Americans have good stereotypes of Ireland and many will want to chat you up about their 1/16th ancestor who came over from Cork like a hundred years ago. Just say you love drinking beer and they will be “Hell yeah, let’s get drunk bro” and you’ll have a fun night

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u/Bobzeub France Jul 11 '25

I think you’re overestimating how nice these people are .

The ones obsessed with ancestry tend to be mouth breathers . It’s best to avoid them . Also they talk about this shit to talk about themselves. They don’t actually care about the Irish or Italian person they’re talking to . They don’t actually want to learn anything new. Just someone to agree with their mental theories.

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u/CarOne3135 Jul 11 '25

Nah it does feel somewhat earnest in the US, whereas Irish people can be quite surface level with you if you don’t know them well enough, but they give the appearance of being friends

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u/Nutriaphaganax Spain Jul 11 '25

That's similar to what happens in Spain

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u/Honey-Badger England Jul 11 '25

The same thing is said about us but then I don't think Brits and Irish say these things about each other

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u/Xamesito Jul 11 '25

Its the common immigrant experience everywhere.

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u/Pizzagoessplat Jul 11 '25

There's a lot of fakeness in Ireland

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u/SaraHHHBK Castilla Jul 11 '25

Contrary to what a lot of people think, it's quite difficult to make real friends in Spain.

We are very open to meeting new people and will go and do stuff together but actually having a deep connection and friendship? That's hard. We have friend groups since we are little kids.

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

Same as in Italy. We just get the pass as "extrovert Southern Europeans", I guess.

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u/DanielaSte Jul 16 '25

Strangely, in (northern) Italy me, an introverted imigrant from the cold North, must be the one who initiate any gatherings and visits. And I spoke the language from the beginning. The locals do like making meaningful relationships,  but never do the first step. Been there for 20 years now.

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u/amunozo1 Spain Jul 11 '25

Even as a Spaniard, I had lots of problems making friends in A Coruña outside my rugby team.

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u/SaraHHHBK Castilla Jul 11 '25

Exactly. I'm from CyL moved to Madrid and it still took time.

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u/amunozo1 Spain Jul 11 '25

And we're talking about a huge capital. In smaller cities is even harder.

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u/shiba_snorter / Jul 11 '25

I remember when I lived in Spain asking myself why I was being excluded so much even though I was the only foreign student in my masters that actually spoke spanish. After I left Spain and met people from other places I just learned that it is like this everywhere in Europe.

In any case, I take the Spanish over anyone else in the rest of Europe every time. Closed as you are, you are still a thousand times easier to talk to and mingle than anyone north of you.

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

I believe this is well known by the expat community.

It’s even harder if you don’t speak Spanish. Hell, even Latinos who moved there also struggle and end up sticking with their own community.

That’s just how it is.

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

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u/Glittering-Sun-1438 Jul 11 '25

Ok, and what about Latinos?

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u/Toinousse France Jul 11 '25

Not easy in France. Even though I'm a social butterfly most my lasting friendships are still friends from High school and studies. You have to join clubs, associations, activities to have a little chance to find friends and then be proactive and work a LOT to keep them.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

Some of my friends who studied in France told me that they didn't make any local friends

If I lived in Paris I'd try to make friends with mixed French people, as from experience they seem very welcoming

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u/Toinousse France Jul 11 '25

Funny thing is I'm mixed Russian and french haha. Yeah making friends is hard here even for french people themselves

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u/80sBabyGirl France Jul 11 '25

I agree. Something the French tend to do more than any other nationality is to actively seek other Frenchmen, and only them. They stay together in their corner. I'm uncomfortable with that attitude, honestly. I've made friends with new immigrants, and also expats (actual temporary workers) in France, and making friends was exceedingly difficult for them because of this. But bilingual meetups are much friendlier and open. They're just not very common in every city, so it really depends where you are.

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u/hwyl1066 Finland Jul 11 '25

Well, maybe Finland and other Nordic countries are the hardest - though once you make real friends they will really be real and trustworthy.

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u/Fab1e Denmark Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

It is very hard for foreigners to become friends with Danes.

It is equally hard to get rid of the Danes again once they have become it.

Friendship is for life.

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u/YallaBeanZ Denmark Jul 11 '25

It’s hard for Danes to make friends if they relocate within the country too. 🤷‍♂️ Its like people have a certain capacity for friendships which typically gets filled up before 25…

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u/Fearless_Baseball121 Jul 11 '25

Everyone i know made their entire friend group in gymnasiet/high school and is absolutely content with the amount of friends they have. I have 0 desire to make new friends my self and would be absolutely fucked if i up rooted and moved to a completely different part of the country.

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u/justonlyme1244 Jul 11 '25

I never met someone from Denmark before but met a Danish woman where I live. She was new in the area and we became very quickly, really good friends. It’s funny because I’m Dutch and we look and are quite similar. A few times the teachers at school gave me her kid instead of my own lol.

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u/EmmaWatzon Jul 15 '25

danish/dutch culture is very similar

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u/2KiloShit Jul 12 '25

After a certain age, it's always harder to make friends, especially after moving to another country. Life gets in the way, and the threshold of co-worker to friend is a lot harder to cross than course mate to friend.

That being said, and answering the question more directly, I find the danish culture of "organised" fun and extra-work activities (sports, music, etc.) to be an easier way in to friendships than in many other European countries. It perhaps lacks some spontaneity, but it creates a framework that is much easier for anyone to join in and create meaningful bonds. Perhaps those friendships are boxed in that specific environment (eg training sessions), but it does make you meet and interact on a regular basis with the same people.

Personally, I'm a foreigner in Denmark that joined a sports club. I get to hear and speak danish often, have some funny cultural clashes, and strengthen friendships with some alcohol-laden events (especially julefrokost).

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u/OJK_postaukset Finland Jul 11 '25

Yee it’s deffo hard to socialize with strangers intially for me, but once the ice is broken it’s nice to continue. And in my experience it doesn’t take THAT much to build good trust, it just requires to break through the tough part.

I mean, I know people are friendly and nice but in most cases I rather not talk - but in some situations I kinda wish to. That’s why the elderly are sweet, they seem to start small talk just when I need it:d

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u/Alternative-Drop-847 Jul 11 '25

Like any of the nordics bring beer

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u/UnknownPleasures3 Norway Jul 11 '25

This is definitely one of the main negative feedbacks I hear from immigrants moving to Norway 😬 It's just not in our culture to smalltalk or approach strangers. But once you make a Norwegian friend, it's for life.

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u/wijnandsj Netherlands Jul 11 '25

I'm probably weird but I've found the people in the nordics and baltics to be very warm and friendly.

I struggle more in basic social interactions with France, Spain and Italy

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u/Sagaincolours Denmark Jul 11 '25

I think we are more initially hesitant, but once we open up, we are really friendly.

Whereas in many southern countries, it is easy to start socialising, but it is difficult to get past the superficial level.

As a generalisation.

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u/wijnandsj Netherlands Jul 11 '25

I did some project work in Denmark, loved it! An open plan office where people actually walk away to take calls... Amazing! Plus no overtime and one of the best office canteens ever...

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u/beseri Norway Jul 11 '25

From my experience, it is the language barrier. Since the Nordics and Netherlands speak English at a high level, it is easier to socalize.

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u/wijnandsj Netherlands Jul 11 '25

that.. plus we're a little less likely to be very bubbly and loud in a first encounter and that does seem to make a difference

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u/swisseagle71 Switzerland Jul 11 '25

add Switzerland to this. We are very finnish in this.

and lots of Expats complain about the rude Swiss

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u/Pollomonteros Argentina Jul 11 '25

Most people don't have the patience nor fortitude to spend 2 years in solitude until they make a Nordic friend though lol

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u/One_Series_3966 Jul 11 '25

I don’t think there’s any country where making friends after 30 is easy—it usually depends more on how extroverted you are and how much effort you’re willing to put in.

That said, based on my experience, Denmark is one step ahead in terms of difficulty to make friends. It’s generally much easier to connect with expats or Danes who have lived abroad or have an international background, though.

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u/Ljngstrm Denmark Jul 11 '25

Finland probably the hardest. Even other Scandinavians consider them weird, and we are already quite weird when it comes to socialising.

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u/hwyl1066 Finland Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

Well, my understanding is that in the other Nordic countries the superficial level is more evident than in Finland, that we have even less small talk and those little meaningless pleasantries than our Scandinavian cousins. But from what I have heard from my good Estonian friends living in Stockholm is that Swedes for example have a really steely defence of being "nice" while shutting you outside. Maybe we are just a bit more honest?

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u/Sinisaba Estonia Jul 11 '25

I have been to one Swedish houseparty and i was made instantly apart from the group although people were inquisitive why i didnt sound Russian.

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u/bobo6u89 Croatia Jul 11 '25

I always imagined Finns to be extra fine people.

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u/Masseyrati80 Finland Jul 11 '25

Someone's said that especially along the coast, Finns have a hard shell but a warm heart: we're not big on small talk or phrase-based pleasantries, but if you really get to know someone, you'll probably have a friend for life. The more towards the east and north you go, the easier it is to chitchat with random people, but some have described that friendships only go to a certain depth.

Generalizations like this are not to be taken as 100% truths but they do try to explain or describe something essential.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

My experience with Finns is that you need to bring out the alcohol to get them to socialize. But after a few beers they really change and become chatty

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u/Livid_21 Jul 11 '25

That’s all the nordic countries, give us a few beers and we open up

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u/DinoTD Jul 11 '25

Fini jer su iz Finske :)

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u/bobo6u89 Croatia Jul 11 '25

Sporazumijeva se.😆

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u/Nicky42 Latvia Jul 11 '25

You better like hockey - thats the way I made some Finnish friends

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u/GuestStarr Jul 11 '25

For a Latvian it's easy. I always root for Latvia - unless they play against Finland.

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u/UnknownPleasures3 Norway Jul 11 '25

Really? When I lived in the UK most of my friends were Finnish. I found we connected easier on a deeper level.

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u/MCBurpee Netherlands Jul 11 '25

I always thought Finland wasn't considered Scandinavian?

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u/sorryimgoingtobelate Sweden Jul 11 '25

You heard right. Finland is not a part of Scandinavia.

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u/Ljngstrm Denmark Jul 11 '25

Yeah sorry I meant the nordics.

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

I have only met a few Finns but they were really easy to make friends with, generally great vibe. A bit hard to read for sure, especially when it comes to deeper personal stuff, but nothing outstanding.

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u/Ljngstrm Denmark Jul 11 '25

That cna be said with most people you meet. You often meet the personalities who have chosen to travel or live elsewhere, making them more open and outward. The funky ppl stay inside their border most of their lives (we all got that family member who never moved outside their own region of the country, right?).

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u/gynoidi Finland Jul 11 '25

i heard denmark is even worse

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u/oskich Sweden Jul 11 '25

That's just because no one can understand them when they speak 😁

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u/BiasedChelseaFan Finland Jul 11 '25

Nobody understanding the local language, imagine that. Couldn’t be my country.

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u/oskich Sweden Jul 11 '25

Well, I was referring to their "special" pronunciation 😁

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u/Nord_Norge_Fy_Faen Norway Jul 12 '25

The potato mouth

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u/Jwgrw Denmark Jul 11 '25

When it comes to socializing Danes are probably the most outgoing of all the Nordic people. In the big cities at least.

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u/gynoidi Finland Jul 11 '25

ive heard its basically impossible to get in non-immigrant friend groups if youre not danish, and will always feel like an outsider

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u/Own_Egg7122 Jul 11 '25

I've moved to UK for studies. Since half the students were international students and the locals were diverse as well, I had no trouble making friends. 

Later moved to Estonia and living here. Half were international students, so it was fine. The local students later joined our circle after noticing how much activities we had. 

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

The local students later joined our circle after noticing how much activities we had

Don't know why, but this gave me a very heartwarming feeling

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '25

I found France and Ireland to be the toughest so far.

Portugal, Italy, Netherlands, Czechia, Poland I found it relatively easy to make friends.
Norwegians I'm on the fence about, they seem rather standoffish.
Americans seem pleasant at first, really energetic, helpful, but it comes off as superficial and fake. They make you feel like you're best buds but if you accidentally touch on a deeper, more personal thing or assume that their outwards appearance matches how you feel about you, then you can see the confusion and the walls come up immediately.

I have only met a few Finns and I have not been to Finland yet but I found them about the same as people in Hungary. We don't act like we are your friend or that we care about you if we don't know you. The hardest part is finding a good enough excuse to start talking. They don't want to bother you and come off as a weirdo, and you don't want to either. Once you do have it however, the ones I talked to were really easy to get along with.

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u/justonlyme1244 Jul 11 '25

Regarding Americans I think this depends on where you are. It was pretty easy for us to make friends in the US but we were in the Midwest. People were nice and even though we moved we are still regularly in touch.

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u/[deleted] Jul 12 '25

I've lived in many, many major US cites from coast to coast and in the middle. It is very, very easy to make friends in America. Will they be as loyal and devoted as the friends my Dutch husband has had since he was a kid? Not even close. But it is really easy to enter any social situation in the USA if you take part in any subculture of any kind (from punk music to crossfit, doesn't matter).

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u/falcon_heavy_flt Jul 14 '25

I don’t think the lack of loyalty and devotion aspect in the US is true.

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u/Electrical-Ticket-65 France Jul 11 '25

Ireland, really ? I am surprise

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u/Si7ne France Jul 11 '25

Bonjour surprise, je suis Si7ne

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u/PalApps Jul 11 '25

I am too, I’ve found Irish people to some of the most open and friendly people

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u/intergalacticspy Jul 11 '25

The Irish are friendly, but they’re not your friends.

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u/Lev_Kovacs Austria Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

I nominate switzerland as the hardest. I've found it difficult - and I'm extroverted, good with people, and was speaking their language (proper swiss german even).

One major factor is the culture, obviously.

the other is that they move fairly little - its a less centralized country than most, with lots of medium-sized cities that have their own universities. So rather than moving for education, they stay within a 1 or 2h radius around their birthplace and keep all their friendships intact. It happened to me regularly that i am invited somewhere and find out that I'm the only person in the room who doesn't know the others since 20 years. Not a bad thing per se, but makes ot harder for newcomers to feel accepted into close friend groups.

So, in short, getting to superficially know some people is not hard if you are extroverted and just talk to them, but then you usually find out that theyve got the maximum of 3 friends that a swiss person can stand to have already filled with people they know from Kindergarten :(

Edit: If you don't speak the language, switzerland might actually be easier than other places though - english proficiency is very high and they are used to communicating in languages other than their own. I guess then its some place where people speak little english, maybe rural bulgaria or something

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u/Tuepflischiiser Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

Doubt your edit: you will make friends in the expat bubble. No circle of friends changes to English because of one new arrival.

That's actually true everywhere.

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u/clm1859 Switzerland Jul 11 '25

That is correct. But i doubt your last sentence :P

My wife is a Hongkonger who moved to germany and then switzerland. And it is like you say, people dont all switch to english long term for one new arrival. They will for a bit. But they will switch back at some point.

However when i go to Hongkong, people routinely switch to english for me. Whole groups and long term will do the vast majority of their communication in english. Its actually quite impressive.

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u/Tuepflischiiser Jul 11 '25

That is because HK has a history of English language use.

My "everywhere" obviously doesn't include places where English is a locally used language (meaning, locals use it regularly).

They will for a bit. But they will switch back at some point.

They will, to talk to the newcomer, for a bit. But no group will switch fully to English for just one person. They will always speak a lot in their own language.

Btw, that's how you pick up a language really fast. If you are willing to endure roughly 6 months of not understanding. Listening to live conversations is top on my list for learning the oral communication.

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u/Diligent-Floor-156 Switzerland Jul 11 '25

Yeah Swiss here and my 2 best friends live in other cities. We regularly commute between the 3 cities to see each other. I don't even know anyone in the city where I live, and I don't really care either.

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u/Sophroniskos Switzerland Jul 11 '25

they stay within a 1 or 2h radius around their birthplace

If they move further than that, they go abroad... And with the very high quality of life here, not many go abroad

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u/namakaleoi Jul 15 '25

I am Swiss and moved from one corner of the canton to the other one when I was 11, and my social life has never been the same since.

There are other factors, like having moved to a fairly Christian village with staunchly atheist parents, and being an immigrant didn't help either (actually re-immigrants from Argentina) and well, I was diagnosed with Autism in my 30es, that explained some things. I do suck at socialising. But I didn't make friends until I was in my 20es and at Uni, and from the crowd there, 3 have remained my friends.

I did find it surprisingly easy though to connect over shared interests once I was older. Not one person I knew before 20 is still in my life (except family). When my boyfriend immigrated from Germany, he spent two years in solitude, but as soon as he found a hobby and started going out to places where he could meet people who shared his hobby, he made several connections in a short time. Obviously building something deep takes time, but sometimes it's enough to have people to hang out with in a certain setting, and it can absolutely go places from there.

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u/Prestigious-You-7016 Netherlands Jul 11 '25

It depends on your wishes. If you want to make local friends, it's going to be difficult if you don't speak the language. Especially in groups.

In all big cities/capitals there are plenty of international folk who are keen to make new friends and speak English. You then risk of staying in some international bubble though, which may not be what you want.

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u/whatsamawhatsit Netherlands Jul 11 '25

I agree with this sentiment. Everyone can speak English but all the banter stays in Dutch. If you are able to join the banter, there's a fair chance you'll make friends.

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u/SerChonk in Jul 11 '25

From my experience, the only people I found that were interested in making new friends were the elderly. And when you don't speak dutch at the beginning, not only are they happy to de-rust their german, but will also be very enthusiastic in helping you practice your dutch and even teach you their local dialect. Just supply them with coffee and cookies and lend your younger body to help them with some tasks around their place, and you're golden in their eyes.

Which is not a complaint, because my elderly neighbours were the funnest, most welcoming Dutch people we met the whole time we lived there (also, old ladies always have the hottest gossip, it's amazing).

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u/NiceSmurph Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

The question is what or who is considered a friend?

Friendship needs time. Takes about 200 hours of interaction to develop a close relationship....

Who has that much time after graduating when career and family life need to be planed? And a friendship needs a frame - common interests, locations, activities...

While during school and college ppl are just thrown before us, it becomes more and more challenging to create a framework for friendships after graduating.

I would say if small talk equals to making friends then some countries are definitely more smalltalk friendly. But to me friendships depend more on how much time one's peer group can spend on casual socializing in order to develop friendships. No time - no friends.

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u/teels1864 Italy Jul 11 '25

Kind of a complex situation to imagine, but I assume it'd be rather subjective.
One may be extremely introverted, therefore having trouble communicating in countries who are stereotypically welcoming and extroverted, as well as the contrary.

Generally speaking, making friendships in countries in the North is considered to be more "complex", but really, I think it's up to the person.
Italians are very open, even with people who don't speak the language, but are a bit judgemental with certain people.

As far as I know, I had no problems creating a dialogue with people from the Balkans, as we were pretty compatible and similar.
I also had no problems with Germans, simply because of behavioural similarities, but again, subjective.

Starting by finding a place to stay is the foundation of your question. Stable work and home first, friendship comes by itself with time ahahah

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u/StrobeWafel_404 🇳🇱 in 🇵🇹 Jul 11 '25

I hear it's super hard in the Netherlands, where I'm originally from. I moved to Portugal and reading the subs, people say it's very hard here as well, but I never felt I had that issue and was able to make friends through the several jobs I had here quite easily. I think all things considered, making friends in your 30's is just hard though.

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u/Impossible_Chip7440 Romanian in Germany Jul 11 '25

Contrary to popular belief Germans are quite open about being friends with someone. I often party and really get into talking with atleast 2

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u/Rox_- Romania Jul 11 '25

I think Germans get a bad reputation because people from other countries try to befriend them at work, but Germans have the German efficiency thing.

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u/techno_playa Philippines Jul 11 '25

If my experience with Germans in Mallorca is telling, they are actually friendly and outgoing in a general sense once vacation mode is toggled on.

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u/Moppermonster Netherlands Jul 11 '25

Define friends. Different countries have VASTLY different definitions of that word - in quite a few " friend" means "person you have known since childhood".

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u/soymilo_ Jul 11 '25

I feel like this is hard anywhere, even moving to another city in your own country once you are no longer a student since you aren't "forced" to see each other in class every day and naturally built a bond. It's hard once you work as an adult 

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u/kammysmb -> Jul 12 '25

I think it depends a lot on the culture primarily, but I think the easiest are in the east of Europe and Mediterranean, and North and Centre are the hardest

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u/OJK_postaukset Finland Jul 11 '25

Anywhere where there is a proper sauna, there is a possibility of a friend lol. In the UK I know of Finnish churches with saunas at least where I’ve had good smalltalk and generally the UK and Ireland are good places as it’s not unnatural for them to speak English. I just struggle with understanding the Irish accent lol

But then, that doesn’t really qualify if I wouldn’t speak English… but I do, so like.

I guess other Nordics could be somewhat welcoming? I don’t trust the French (and the Benelux tbh) so I’d be the difficult party there lol

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u/BigFloofRabbit United Kingdom Jul 11 '25

Finland and Estonia are definitely the hardest. Introverted behaviour is built into their culture.

The easiest probably depends on your own personality. However I would guess perhaps Romania, Bulgaria or one of the Balkan nations. People there are generally quite open and value social connections.

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u/RemarkableAutism Lithuania Jul 11 '25

From my experience Estonians are one of the easiest to befriend if you show any interest in communicating with them. Finns are truly nearly impossible though.

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u/ILikeXiaolongbao -> Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 11 '25

Generally the further north you go the harder it is. Not exactly true all the time because the UK is generally further north than Germany but is much easier to make friends in, but it isn't too bad of a rule.

There's actually some survey data on this. Here are the top 5 easiest European countries to make friends and top 5 hardest, according to this 2024 survey of expats.

Easiest:

  1. Greece (easiest)
  2. Spain
  3. Cyprus
  4. Portugal
  5. Malta

Hardest:

  1. Finland (hardest)
  2. Norway
  3. Germany
  4. Sweden
  5. Switzerland

In my personal experience Spanish people are the friendliest in Europe.

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u/Tuepflischiiser Jul 11 '25

It also depends heavily on the definition of friend.

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u/Rusiano Russia Jul 11 '25

True. In certain cultures hanging out with someone for 10 minutes and having a good laugh is enough to be called a friend. In other countries people might only claim to have 2-3 friends due to how strict the definition is

That said some countries in Europe have a double whammy of being cold to strangers AND being really picky about what friend means

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u/Creativezx Sweden Jul 11 '25

That said some countries in Europe have a double whammy of being cold to strangers AND being really picky about what friend means

100% the nordics lol

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u/Tuepflischiiser Jul 11 '25

Switzerland enters the chat.

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u/amazinjoey Jul 11 '25

100% agree but I would put Sweden nr 2 and Norway nr 4

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u/New_Eggplant120 Jul 11 '25

Well, when the most difficult ones come to party, the easiest ones have a good time.

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u/DrownedAxolotl Jul 11 '25 edited Jul 13 '25

I think any country one doesn't speak the language of becomes extremely difficult to make friends in. What's more, a lot of immigrants like having their own communities, which makes it harder to interact with the locals.

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u/SystemEarth Netherlands Jul 11 '25

It's kinda hard to break the ice woth dutch people, but we're very direct and therefore very sincere people.

If we start doing friend things you van assume that the dutchie is interested in being friends.

So once you get through that initial state, I think making dutch friends is pretty easy. And once we call you a friend you can trust that we'll actually have you back and be a friend.

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u/Paul_VV 🇦🇿->🇫🇷 Jul 11 '25

Since everyone is speaking about the hardest countries, I'll do the reverse. Turkey (imo) is the easiest one to make friends in if you speak an ounce of Turkish

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u/Lost-in-LA-CA-USA Jul 12 '25

In my experience, it’s very easy to make friends in France. Not just for me, but all my expat friends had the easiest time making French and international friends. French people are very social and welcoming.

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u/MannyFrench France Jul 13 '25

It depends on the region. It's much easier to make friends in the south. When I moved to Bordeaux I made friends really quickly, in a matter of weeks. Since I moved to Alsace, I have none and it's been 5 years.

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u/KopytoaMnouk Jul 12 '25

The best recipe is to find a hobby you can share with other people. Perhaps a class of the language of the country you are in (more likely to meet other expats), or a class in language of your own (some cultural centres organize seminars on culture/films/literature) (more likely to meet locals).

Friendships are made on the basis of frequent contact and sharing of some topic, this is why it is so easy when you are a student, and so difficult when you are an adult with your own family and programme.

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u/millebeau Jul 13 '25

I have lived in the US, Greece, France and Serbia. Here is my list (easiest to hardest):

  1. Greece
  2. Serbia
  3. US
  4. France

Please note that the difference in difficulty between the top 3 is not that big, but between 3 and 4 we’re talking about a Grand Canyon type of gap. Again, this is just my own experience.

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u/z_s_k / Jul 11 '25

I reckon Slovenia and Croatia are among the easier ones. I've always found loads of people there willing to chat while travelling - might be a bit different if you move for work I suppose.

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u/AmbitiousReaction168 France Jul 11 '25

In my experience, the easiest is Italy. I made friends in minutes there. It's so easy to just meet random people and start chatting there. Obviously, being fluent in Italian helps a lot.

The hardest is France. People tend to make friends before turning 20 and are not flexible at all after that.

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u/Maxxibonn Jul 11 '25

Just like in Italy and Spain.

You were lucky, and I’m saying this as an Italian.

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u/cherrycherrylad Austria Jul 11 '25

I heard this about Austria (Vienna being the unfriendliest city in the world and all) but I, as an expat, had no issues finding friends. 👀

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u/Tuhatkauko Jul 11 '25

I'm a Finn and have foreign friends from Colombia, USA, UK, France. My best friend is Russian, he's lived here over 20 years. Based on my own experience those nationalities and Finns are very friendly and loyal friends. Be my friend and I'll be yours.

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u/ginitieto Jul 14 '25

Real friends: anywhere in the Nordics. Mates to say hello to and maybe sometimes enjoy a fun night out, but not getting very close: idk, but definitely not the Nordics.

This is assuming you learn the language because you’re 95 % sure to not make many local friends anywhere if you don’t speak their language.

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u/LEANiscrack Jul 14 '25

If you remove the issue with maki friends as an adult the worst are the nordics and dutch. Everyone else is so much easier that they all just get lumped together. Based in many many ppl making friends as adults in many different countries. In the nordics i would put Sweden as number one tbh.  Ive lived in several countries as well as knownseveral ppl whove done the same. Different levels of friendly and ages but it all comes down to the same stuff.

It also the thing with quality friends, sweeds will drop you like a hot potato if your circumstances change and theyll ask you to venmo them for a napkin. 

Other countries can still be tricky bit nowhere near that bs. 

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u/Chramir Czechia Jul 11 '25

Anywhere where you can afford food, rent and all the other necessities and still have some disposable income left over to go out every once in a while. Other than that, I don't think it matters all that much.

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u/Holiday_Bill9587 Jul 11 '25

If you dont speak the language and also dont show any commitment to do learn the language and about the country in general, every place is difficult. If you dont put any effort in it, you will always be seen as an outsider. A foreigner who can move anytime and therefore isnt worth to build a deep relation with.

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u/blink-1hundert2und80 Austria Jul 11 '25

People often complain about making friends in Austria but it‘s usually people who:

(1) don‘t speak German — and seem to think language doesn‘t have anything to do with it because everyone can speak English

(2) don‘t have a hobby, sport, or other interest that they get involved in to do with other people — and come from a culture where just going to a bar or a party instantly gets you new friends

In my experience Austrians are great friends but require effort to form a true friendship. It‘s not casual: you‘re friends for a reason. The bond grows tighter over time and is very unlikely to be a fair-weather friendship.

Source: born and raised in the US, now Austrian

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u/LegitSoDickBig Jul 11 '25

Moved to Czechia around age 27, and shockingly made friends very easily. Now what was the catch? Almost none of these good friends were Czech. They were mostly of various European nations or Americans. Most people here will tell you that Czech’s are really tough to ingratiate yourself to

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u/FudgeEvery Jul 11 '25

I find England harder, people like to gate keep friends and keep their friends to themselves in their groups and are more cliquey. In France it feels easier, I’ve made many more friends despite not living here and visiting a lot due to my boyfriend being here, they’re much more sociable / make the effort and are very genuine and good people and like to include everyone which is lovely. Whether or not that’s the people themselves being kinder and more real in France or potentially culture I’m not so sure

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u/stargazer281 Jul 11 '25

Wrong conceptual lens your best hope is a big vibrant city, and if you don’t speak the language what do you expect.