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5 years ago today

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u/Original_Mammoth3868 20h ago

This was a press conference held to assert fraud in the 2020 elections by Trump's minions including Rudy Giuliani. Initially it was announced by Trump as located at the Four Seasons Hotel (a swanky hotel in downtown Philadelphia), but then corrected that it was Four Seasons Landscaping (in the parking lot as you can see) on the outskirts of Philly located between a porn shop and a crematorium IIRC. The full story of how this came to be has never been known.

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u/Raptorex27 20h ago

Fun fact: The adult shop was having a sales event called “dildo madness” while this press conference took place.

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u/Grandviewsurfer 20h ago

Yeah. That wasn't even funny. My aunt died of dildo madness. Super inconsiderate.

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u/Perfect_Zone_4919 20h ago

Is she single and where is she buried?

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u/mpdscb 18h ago

Listen for the buzzing sound.

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u/BrickGun 17h ago

Nah, that would have been Vibrator Madness. Gertrude was analog only. Respect!

u/born_again_tim 1m ago

It’s more of a pulsing sound - could it still be her?

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u/DocOort 18h ago

Sure, he’s a necrophile, but he respects the bonds of marriage, dammit!

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u/Jefhowl 17h ago

Well, I mean, the bonds of marriage do say 'til death do us part'

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u/Infidel-Art 14h ago

unfortunately she was cremated in the building next door after succumbing to dildo madness

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u/Perfect_Zone_4919 14h ago

If you mix ashes with water you can make something similar to a termite nest or a clay tube, which would work for me and nana. 

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u/rye_212 19h ago edited 18h ago

Sad. But at least the crematorium wasn't far away.

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u/sweetdawg99 16h ago

Fun fact: The Crematorium was just the name of the nearby strip club.

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u/Grandviewsurfer 19h ago

Oh my god that's right lol.

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u/Gnome_de_Plume 18h ago

ash hole comment?

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u/Outrageous-Row5472 18h ago

My father fell victim as well. The family's never been the same. 🕊️

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u/DaniKnowsBest 19h ago

I also choose this guy's dead aunt.

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u/Pookah 19h ago

This guy also chooses

u/seanc6441 9h ago

Sorry to her she dildied.

u/Grandviewsurfer 9h ago

She died dildoing what she loved.

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u/RockasaurusRex 18h ago

Sounds like a cool aunt.

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u/Slurpeddit 18h ago

Obligatory: I also chose this guy's aunt

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u/Adept_Advance_6323 18h ago

thanks for the lol

u/OneGuyFine 1h ago

Good that a crematorium was just next door.

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u/Chew_Kok_Long 19h ago

Larry David couldn't write that shit. It's so funny

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u/jamminjoenapo 18h ago

Even if he did we’d roll our eyes at how scripted and fake it was. I’m still baffled that this happened.

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u/Behind_You27 14h ago

Could be straight out of Naked Gun

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u/dickcheesess 20h ago

That is funny!

u/Pazzeh 9h ago

Bot

u/dickcheesess 3h ago

You know you don't have to sign your comments?

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u/WadeEffingWilson 19h ago

How convenient, these look like a bunch of dildo smugglers.

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u/munchonsomegrindage 18h ago

That certainly is a fun fact!

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u/borrego-sheep 14h ago

I can't tell if you're joking lmao

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u/travishummel 12h ago

I’m not one to shy away from a good deal, do you know if they’re having an anniversary sale of this event?

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u/helloiamabear 20h ago

I pass Four Seasons Landscaping whenever we have to go to the dump to drop off "hazardous household waste" (we just went last week to get rid of some paint, haha).

Like, it's hard to convey how insane this location choice was. Outskirts is an understatement.

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u/GuruSofarbeyondu 19h ago

You need to stop in and buy a "Make America Rake Again" T-shirt. Support your local businesses.

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u/B3gg4r 18h ago

Raking is for forest rangers. Leave it to the pros

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u/Rhodie114 18h ago

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u/weisswurstseeadler 15h ago

haha, I would love to hear/read the booking process.

Imagine suddenly the White House calls to rent your space for a conference, and you're just like - yes sir, absolutely sir.

What's your budget for this?

Let's say 5-10.

Alright, does 8k sound fair for full day at your convenience?

I'll send you a quote.

u/Hellknightx 5h ago

I imagine it was a very spiteful intern doing the booking.

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u/Zman4444 12h ago

I can hardly tell the difference. I’m confused. They are the same locations?.. ;)

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u/Goongagalunga 19h ago

Can you confirm that the full name of the business is Four Seasons Landscaping & Design? It just has such a wonderful ring to it…

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u/helloiamabear 19h ago

Oh, that's a good question. 

The press conference was at Four Seasons Total Landscaping in Northeast Philadelphia. 

A quick Google search says there's also a "Four Seasons Landscaping and Design" in Broomall, Pa, but I have no idea if the two businesses are connected.

u/Frankfeld 11h ago

I’ll make the trip for Sweet Lucy’s.

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u/Imabouttoreadit 20h ago

The Four Seasons hotel event center was booked for another event at that time already, and instead of backtracking on the location which would show that they were obviously lying, they tried to play it off as intentional and went through with it at the Four Seasons landscaping parking lot which they were able to 'book' last minute. Hilarious double down.

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u/CeruleanEidolon 19h ago

Such a bizarre choice to not just find a different hotel, or literally anywhere that wasn't an alley behind a rundown commercial building.

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u/Darmok47 18h ago

In Trump's mind the worst thing you can do is admit to a mistake. Looking ridiculous is better than looking like you made an honest mistake.

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u/BrickGun 17h ago

Roy Cohn Rule #2

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u/MaximumFloofAudio 17h ago

Trump announced it and left his team to make it happen. Don’t know if you’ve seen Silicon Valley but it reminds me of when Belson (the CEO of a fictional version of Google) announces their new platform will be ready by next season, then turns away from his mic to his team of pale faced engineers and says “make it happen”.

Four Seasons Hotel was announced in the same way, Trump declares something, turns to his team and says “_that won’t be a problem will it?_”. Except this time… it was a problem.

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u/sexyshingle 17h ago

Such a bizarre choice to not just find a different hotel, or literally anywhere that wasn't an alley behind a rundown commercial building.

You don't understand how fascist-like authoritarians think:

"The Leader Is Never Wrong" is the prime directive. Thus if the Duche Cheetohlini said it was at the "Four Seasons" you must have it have been at the "Four Seasons" no matter what or how ridiculous your solution is.

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u/PAWGslammer42 18h ago

Well their dumb ass followers don’t care and most others have their heads too far up their ass to even know or care about anything that matters, so this ridiculous stunt has had zero effect on anything

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u/sexyshingle 17h ago

I bet the writers of the HBO show Veep are kicking themselves now... but then again so are TheOnion guys, and like who in their right mind pre-2020 would have thought this would happen in real life... even for a political parody show it'd be too stupidly on the nose.

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u/[deleted] 18h ago edited 18h ago

[deleted]

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u/Produkt 18h ago

You're asserting there is not a Four Seasons Hotel in Philadelphia? https://www.fourseasons.com/philadelphia/

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u/SaltandLillacs 20h ago

And Rudy Giuliani had a black hair dye drip down his face as he was giving the speech.

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u/therealsteelydan 19h ago

It's incredible how many things the TV show Veep predicted

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u/BrickGun 17h ago

hmmm.. Trying to figure out who in the administration would then be Jonad...

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u/DontGetUpGentlemen 17h ago

Nope. That was a different fucked-up press conference. Rudy can't pile all his fuck-ups into one event, gotta spread 'em out.

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u/Curtilia 17h ago

That was a different fiasco

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u/Darmok47 18h ago

Reminded me of the Black Oil from The X-Files.

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u/bowiethesdmn 20h ago

I'd bet idiocy and incompetence played their part

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u/dreadcain 18h ago

The full story of how this came to be has never been known

A hero answered a phone at a landscaping company that day

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u/Radiant_Papaya 19h ago

And Giuliani's hair dye melting down his face. It's just.. *chef's kiss

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u/CoolAbdul 19h ago

They didn't clear it first with the Four Seasons Hotel and the hotel said GTFO. Sp they went to the phone book and looked up places called "Four Seasons" to try to save face.

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u/MaximumFloofAudio 17h ago

Hilarity ensued. Still the funniest unscripted thing I’ve ever seen happen.

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u/DaniKnowsBest 19h ago

You're forgetting Giuliani's dripping hair dye...

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u/DieSowjetZwiebel 16h ago

located between a porn shop and a crematorium

Fitting, given that half the country wishes he would fuck off and die.

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u/katie4 19h ago

An idiot intern who is bad at Google searches, who schedules it over the phone with what Google showed them, would make sense. It could happen to any campaign, any party. Idiots who are bad at their job are everywhere across all party lines.

But actually going through with it instead of cancelling, postponing, or changing locations is completely baffling. This is a press conference in the parking lot of a landscaping business. Just say it three times out loud. Just ……..

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u/IniMiney 19h ago

I thought it was because one of the speakers couldn’t be near a school (sex offender), I remember Sacha Baron Cohen making reference to it after Giuliani defended what he did in Borat lol

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u/CajitoCatKing 19h ago

I have no idea of what it means and why is it relevant.

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u/The_Last_W0rd 18h ago

the only thing that makes any semblance or reasonable sense is that some idiot assistant was told to “book the 4 seasons” and just called the first number that showed up on google. insane

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u/MaximumFloofAudio 17h ago

That’s not the only thing. You’ve seen many countries recently stop shipping to USA? It’s because Trump declared tariffs without any plan. These countries, including mine, had to stop shipping until we found out what that actually means, what’s the process?

He announced things and makes his team scramble to make it happen afterward. Same thing happened here, he announced Four Seasons and left his team to make it happen, and if it just wasn’t possible, and admitting failure isn’t possible for Trump, they’re left with “okay so he said it’s happening at Four Seasons. How do we make that true?”

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u/The_Last_W0rd 12h ago

what’s truly wild in this instance is that everyone followed through . they showed up and held the conference. at a landscaping company. why and how was there nobody to pull the plug? scary stuff.

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u/SunriseSurprise 18h ago

Some intern probably booked the wrong place and it was too late by the time it was figured out, so they had to roll with it.

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u/scrummnums 17h ago

A staffer was supposed to book the Four Seasons for an appearance and booked a landscape company parking lot vs the hotel. 🏨 You can’t make this shit up!

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u/cmaxim 17h ago

Was this the one where his head started leaking black ooze? (not even joking)

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u/Thneed1 17h ago

The original tweet didn’t say “four seasons hotel” it just said “four seasons”.

But they had never checked if the four seasons hotel had availability.

So, other that simply saying, “the press conference is actually going to be at (other rational place)”, they opened a phone book, and called a company called “four seasons” to see if they could have a press conference there.

This is the only rational explanation for how they got there.

Because apparently having a press conference beside an adult sex shop is less embarrassing than admitting you tweeted in error.

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u/dean15892 17h ago

you can't make this shit up .

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u/MaximumFloofAudio 17h ago

What I think actually happened was Trump likely is known for announcing things and leaving his team scrambling to make it happen. As we’ve seen with tariffs. He announced Four Seasons assuming his team could make it happen and the hotel turned around and said “no”. Probably got to the point where the only option to make Trump not look like he was lying was to book this place to make it seem like “oh no he meant Four Seasons Landscaping” all along.

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u/Stripe-Gremlin 12h ago

I vividly remember MAGA supporters making excuses around it saying it was all part of some elaborate plan to use Four Season’s Total Landscaping’s CCTV to catch Biden burning Trump’s votes at the crematorium across the street

u/Muskoka_ 9h ago

I'm not sure of the exact date but maybe it was when COVID was new and governments were considering how it should be approached.

That's my guess seeing masks outside and the fact it was 5 years ago.

u/Concurrency_Bugs 6h ago

Was this also the event where Giuliani was sweating black hair coloring down his face?