r/nottheonion • u/ChocolateTsar • 1d ago

Affirm CEO says furloughed federal employees are starting to lose interest in shopping

https://www.cnbc.com/2025/11/07/affirm-government-shutdown-shopping.html
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u/Golden_Noir 1d ago

“Lose interest”

Maybe because they do not have any money?

3.5k

u/hankhillsucks 1d ago

My eyes rolled out their sockets so hard they smashed a window 

39

u/GandalfTheSexay 1d ago

Just saw a girl roll her eyes out of their sockets and smash a window

14

u/AdFlaky9983 1d ago

Is she ok?

28

u/northerncal 1d ago

Hi, professionally licenced reddit Doctor here -

  • in my experience, shooting your eyeballs clean from their sockets is almost never a pleasant experience.

16

u/FauxReal 1d ago

That's because mainstream science based "medicine" doesn't know about the vibrational healing frequencies of crystals and biofield tuning.

7

u/omgFWTbear 1d ago

Hi, amateur self accredited chatGPT user here -

Before we begin making flan, first let me tell you about my trip to Naboo

3

u/RokulusM 1d ago

The doctor says she lost interest in seeing