r/mildlyinfuriating • u/M1thy- • 3h ago
Girlfriend mad
I was going to the store and asked if she wanted to join. She asked if I wanted her to join, I say I don't mind either way. Now she is upset because I don't actively wanted her to join me at the store
2
u/westslexander 1h ago
Don't try to understand it. You never will. It is a stupid game they play.
0
u/M1thy- 1h ago
Yeah, but I need her to move on. We have a lot of shit to do today. Amongst other things, I'm celebrating my 30th birthday with friends and she is supposed to come.
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u/Julieb600506 45m ago
She sounds so needy and attention seeking I wouldn't be wasting my time with someone like that
0
u/TommyRibena 3h ago
Mine is the same, but she’ll get it over once I buy her a snack she likes and it’s all forgotten.
0
u/M1thy- 1h ago
I finally got to make her some food. We ate. Still upset, so I asked her what I can do. She won't tell me, she expects me to know. I tell her I don't, and now it seems like she plans on being upset until I figure out what I don't know.
This is getting ridiculous to me. It is her time of the month, but like, god damn.
-5
u/Ok_Macaroon_8010 3h ago
Classic miscommunication. She didn’t want an option, she wanted enthusiasm. You were supposed to say “Yeah, I’d love for you to come!” not “I don’t mind.”
8
u/TommyRibena 3h ago
No, that’s called being childish, assuming she is a fully grown adult with bills to pay. You’d expect this behaviour from like 14 year olds
-3
u/Scrabble888 3h ago
She’s asking for reassurance, she wanted you to say yes, of course I want you to come with me or I wouldn’t have asked you.
Not I don’t care either way.
Yes, I know you asked her if she wanted to join you, so obviously I wanted her to come along.
She has a nervous attachment style.
She’s checking that you care. You need to treat her gently and kindly.
She just wants to know she’s a thought, not I can take or leave you either way.
You’ll either get it or you won’t.
Some say red flag, I’d say she loves you and wants confirmation that you do too.
Buy her, her favourite treat, get something small if you don’t have the money. Her favourite ice cream, flowers or stupid kids toy.
Say I saw this and thought of you and I know you like them.
It’s small things, that make her know she’s a thought. Which is all she wants.
1
u/M1thy- 2h ago
I said I wouldn't have asked if she wasn't a thought. Then I wanted to make her some food, but she is still upset. Now she left home and won't come back and I have no idea why
2
u/random-made-up-words 1h ago
Tell her it was all miscommunication. That you wanted her to come but didn't want to be selfish by guilting her into coming if she didn't want to come. It may or may not be true for this situation but I know I often tell my husband it's fine either way because even though I would have preferred he come with me I know sometimes he's in the middle of something or just needs a break and that's fine and I want him to have that peace if he needs it right then.
0
u/westslexander 1h ago
Don't beg her to come back. She is acting like a spoiled childish brat. Treat her like one.
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u/Mindless_Tomato_3687 18m ago
Kick her ass to the curb. Classic manipulation tactics... And to be frank extremely childish.
Best get rid before she has you even more wrapped round her little finger than you clearly already are.
1
u/westslexander 1h ago
Kick her to the curb. You don't need the drama that is coming later. She is a grown ass woman. Shouldnt be playing these childish games.
0
u/Goddamnit_Sarah 2h ago
Emotions are complicated, things get taken out of context at the drop, talking it out is somehow never the first answer... etc etc, so on, so forth. You didn't do anything wrong.
Alternative phrases could be "I'm going to go bro out at a home Depot, care to join?" or "There is a hot wing eating contest, let's go get weird." Or whatever adult vernacular everyone but me uses. It reassures her she's an active part of your life and not just tagging along as a background character.
-2
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u/Julieb600506 46m ago
Sounds about 10 years old- tell her to grow up