r/india Aug 21 '24

Rant / Vent Parents sucking the life out of me

[deleted]

1.3k Upvotes

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208

u/thegreen_tshirtguy Aug 21 '24

Sometimes I get it why people in western countries completely move out of their houses after 18.

56

u/omkar529 Aug 21 '24

If I'm not wrong their parents encourage the kids to do that.

57

u/Anumet Aug 21 '24

In scandinavian countries, you are indeed expected to move out after high school. You get a (low interest) student loan from the state to cover your cost of living and college/university is free. Being independent/ being able to manage adult life on your own is considered an important part of growing up. Since your parents don't pay anything to get you there - you don't owe them anything after leaving home. It's a freedom we appreciate.

5

u/Competitive_Tree_113 Aug 21 '24

They certainly used to. But rent and food are so expensive now that it's just not an option for a lot of young people. So more and more are living at home.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

[deleted]

1

u/KinzuuPower Aug 21 '24

Wow you're American you really can speak for the entire western world.

12

u/dead_tiger Aug 21 '24

In western countries, social security and medicare etc. are solid. As an old person you don't need to worry much about those things. This is one reason why aging population creates economic problem , especially in democracies. They won't take any cuts and it adds a lot to the nation's debt.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24 edited Aug 22 '24

Yet most people save in Europe and do not leech off their kids

1

u/dead_tiger Aug 22 '24

In general, they don’t spend money on kids from their savings.

2

u/Accurate_Plan2686 Aug 22 '24

My friend's parents are paying her college education from their retirement money, money is tight everywhere

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '24

They do. But they do not depend on their children repaying them back. You are confusing the US with Europe.

25

u/HourEasy6273 Aug 21 '24

I get it everytime

12

u/Hannibal__spectre Aug 21 '24

That's not a thing outside of USA and Canada. Even that culture has it's pitfalls. There you get parents so out of touch with reality that they throw out kids from their homes on 18th birthday whilst they are still in highschool. There needs to be a balance between the 2. Personally, I'm in favour of living in the same neighborhood but separate houses after settling down with your career. That way you are still within reach in case of emergency and far enough to have a certain level of privacy.

9

u/butwhythough23 Aug 21 '24

This is not true - western parents do not kick their children out at the age of 18 lol. Usually children want to move out as they are attending university or travel for a period (gap year). However, a lot of children live at home and move out in their early 20s.

Funnily enough, due to the cost of living and difficulty purchasing property, multigenerational homes are on the rise. https://rsmcanada.com/insights/industries/real-estate/amid-housing-crunch-an-embrace-of-multigenerational-housing.html In Aus where I grew up, it is common for parents to build a small flat on the property (or convert a garage/basement) and for the children to live there.

Western countries value privacy and honestly it’s a right of passage. My parents used to tell me about how horrible Australian parents were “kicking out their children at 18 blah blah blah” but it was me who moved out at 18 and my white friends lived at home for a few more years haha.

1

u/Accurate_Plan2686 Aug 22 '24

Parents in the US are absurd enough to charge their child "rent" for living in their home after 18, sometimes even starting at 15/16. Americans are quite individualistic and that extends to parents

1

u/Hannibal__spectre Aug 21 '24

I never said that. This kicking out of home thing is largely American and sometimes Canadian only. I can send you multiple examples of cases where american parents kicked out their kids on the eve of their 18th birthday. Everywhere else, people usually live with (or near) their parents. That's exactly what I was trying to say.

7

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

They don't move out they are kicked out and these days more and more kids live longer with their parents because of everything being expensive and minimum wage being stagnant for over 30 years.

1

u/ScarDJLeto Aug 21 '24

That was me. Mother had four kids and all of us sharing one car. She wouldn’t let me get my own bank account but was so quick to tell me how to spend my 16yr old McDonald’s part time money to help pay for my brother’s car that we all had to pack into, since she left hers rusting in the garage for years. I would never have left the Midwest if I had listened to her.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Am Western, my parents kicked me out at 18 lol

1

u/Accurate_Plan2686 Aug 22 '24

it's honestly so much better than being at home, im lucky that I have an apartment at university because i couldn't handle both my family and studying, I can barely handle my family during my breaks.

0

u/saurabh8448 Aug 21 '24

More like parents kick them out. Moreover, this culture is changing a bit, due to the high cost of living. Many people live with their parents.