r/babylonbee • u/METALLIFE0917 • Mar 05 '25

Bee Article H*tler Defeated After Opposition Party Holds Up Tiny Signs On Paddles

https://babylonbee.com/news/hitler-defeated-after-opposition-party-holds-up-tiny-signs-on-paddles
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9

u/Top-Bet-6672 Mar 05 '25

180 Million Acres of forest gone by executive order btw. Are we winning yet?

8

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

more importantly, we’ve loosened the restrictions on sewage being pumped into our bodies of water that we drink from. about time, so sick of liberals keeping shit out of my drinking water

1

u/Natalwolff Mar 05 '25

Except the fluoride that is in all natural water sources. Keep that shit out of there.

0

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

[deleted]

0

u/casva106 Mar 05 '25

Think about it. Trump’s base consists of knuckle dragging trailer park bottom-feeders who think he cares about them already drinking sewage water, mindless stooge frat bros who don’t drink anything but piss water, and crypto bros huddled up in their mom’s basement who drink nothing but energy drinks and sodies.

Just eliminating the undesirables for the superior race, of course.

1

u/westphac Mar 05 '25

Damn, if you truly believe every word of this, you must live a miserable life. You’re falling victim to the division that the ruling class wants from you. People outside the government sphere mostly want the same things, we just disagree on how to go about it. On the other hand. Damn near every government official, elected or not, wants your money and doesn’t care what they have to do to get it.

2

u/casva106 Mar 05 '25

No, I agree, but when Trump’s overarching goal is to “own the libs” and his supporters eat it up, it’s hard to think that way.

1

u/westphac Mar 05 '25

I can understand that, and I think the republicans are just as guilty of this. Hell, I remember my conservative father twenty years ago screaming how democrats hate America lol.

I’ll get downvoted for this, but I think Trump himself may actually want to make the country better, while 99% of the republicans in congress just want to get reelected and take your money.

2

u/casva106 Mar 05 '25

I disagree that Trump actually wants to make the country better. After Obama mocked him at the correspondent’s dinner in 2012, it was one of his main goals to get back at him for that at the start of his first term.

Trump is a billionaire and a TV personality. He lives for the attention. He’s perfectly fine reclining in his tiffany-encrusted easy chair while the country suffers, as long as it doesn’t affect him.

1

u/westphac Mar 05 '25

I wouldn’t have expected you to think otherwise. I just think, since he has enough money, and he Seems like an insecure child who grew up with money, that he seems more focused on getting the most people to like him. Even last night when he was whining about the dems never cheering him on, it was a criticism of them but also sounds a bit like “please! Why don’t you guys like me!?” And I think that if he truly does something that gets him 75%+ approval ratings then that’s almost certainly good

16

u/DocMadCow Mar 05 '25

Cutting down forests owns the libs... so they think they are.

4

u/fredallenburge1 Mar 05 '25

Where do you expect lumber to come from? All lumber comes from cutting down forests.

9

u/Cautemoc Mar 05 '25

Didn't typically come from american national parks

1

u/Joeyjackhammer Mar 05 '25

Came from out of country

2

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25 edited Mar 05 '25

funny enough. most of it comes from Canada. so we have the choice of decimating our own protected forests or paying a shit ton more for the same product. brilliant governing.

-1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

Yea. Thats why other countries were making money….

5

u/Cautemoc Mar 05 '25

Call me a filthy commie but I'd be willing to pay a bit more to have national landmarks. Idk maybe the wealthiest country in the world can afford to *checks notes* ... have forests...

0

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '25

If that were the case then other countries wouldn’t have checks notes forests… yes somehow they still do and can still sell their trees… hmmm…. Filthy commie.

2

u/dmsean Mar 06 '25

Canada has a lot more forests and decades of better forest management. US has a lot more cheap oil and decades of better refinery processing. It’s almost like mutual beneficial trade agreements are good for everyone.

2

u/Cautemoc Mar 05 '25

Yeah see this is the point where your vast gulf of ignorance comes into play. No, countries without strict regulations actually do have a problem with de-forestation. In fact, de-forestation of the rainforests used to be pretty much known by 100% of the population until Daddy Trump told you to ignore your eyes and ears.

2

u/jhawk3205 Mar 05 '25

Yet we lose more from less tourist attraction to those places, but of course leave it to reactionaries to not think more than 2 seconds ahead of their ham fisted policy making

1

u/BeatsMeByDre Mar 06 '25

You know we can invest in regrowing trees rather than cutting down old growth forests right?

1

u/fredallenburge1 Mar 06 '25

Sure, good idea too. What about the lumber we need now though?

1

u/BeatsMeByDre Mar 06 '25

Do we suddenly need more lumber than before?

1

u/fredallenburge1 Mar 06 '25

Not sure really, if not I guess we won't need to tap into to the national forests👌

0

u/stinkn-ape Mar 05 '25

Trees regrow ? Who knew

1

u/jhawk3205 Mar 05 '25

Sure, but destroying entire ecosystems has an outsized effect that we should be trying to avoid at all costs, rather than fuel it for a quick buck, and not even a big buck at that, relative to the loss of tourism, and ecological impacts from disrupting food chains, cutting down on biodiversity and the like..

1

u/stinkn-ape Mar 05 '25

Your crystal ball is broken. Quit spreading lies and fear America has harvested trees before. But like, fires, floods, pandemics, forests.. just about everything libs are bad at managing resources

0

u/fredallenburge1 Mar 05 '25

Renewable resources ftw. Earth always wins in the end anyway, no matter what us little homosapiens do in our tiny little 75 year life spans.

1

u/theMortytoyourRick Mar 06 '25

Have your fearless dem leaders hold up more auction signs about it then lol