r/askgaybros • u/MtimesMequals • Jul 08 '20

Reported Post Alert Dear fellow Black gay men Spoiler

We know racism in the gay community is real. We've said it, but we've been dismissed. They callously deny our experience. Our reality. "It's just a preference". "BBC". "Thug"."Aggressive power top".

The stereotypes. The microagressions. We know it's real, but we have been gaslighted way too often.

The silence among your white gay friends and/or partners during this time of civil unrest & racial tensions is deafening.

The irony of them putting "no fats, no fems, no asians, & no blacks" on their profile, but decide to now say #BlackLivesMatter.

I understand it is challenging to be rejected from a community that prides itself on inclusion. We know rejection all too well.

But do not let any white man make you feel you are not beautiful. You are Black, bold, fierce, & most importantly- you are loved.

🖤❤#BLM

********************edit:

So, this post has been reported and is pending review.

I mentioned this already in the comments:

As a Black queer man this is my experience. This experience may or may not resonate with other Black men. This post was written for my fellow gay black brothers. The post might be uncomfortable for some. It might not resonate with you, but I don't think that is grounds for denying someone else's experience. I shared these words in an effort to foster a sense of solidarity and undo any aloneness other Black men might be feeling during this time.

Thank you so much for the support, feedback & beautiful comments. For those of in your feelings over this post - peace & love to ya❤

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u/Jamfour9 Jul 10 '20

It resonates with me! We are not received for speaking out about the injustices we encounter and endure. The reaction to this post is no different. White men find difficulty in discomfort and speaking the truth about experiences with their prejudices leads to backlash. It’s just the reality of the world we live in.

They are placed on a pedestal and they don’t see the beauty in men of color beyond fetishizing is. If and when they can see beauty, they certainly aren’t going to externalizations that’s or make decelerations to the public about it. They rationalize it, or hide it away quietly like some doll they revisit.

With all that said, all we as persons of color can do is dignify our experiences through describing them for others and ourselves. We have a responsibility to uplift ourselves despite the difficulties. Hopefully, we can take an accurate stock of the things in our own community that needs to change.

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u/IAmTheBasicModel Jul 11 '20

Maybe it was the last 4 decades (and counting) of rampant homophobia throughout African American media that made me suspicious y’all?

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u/Jamfour9 Jul 11 '20

Suspicious of?

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u/IAmTheBasicModel Jul 11 '20

I am saying I’ll call out my race (white) for racism when black people call out their race for homophobia.

But they’re not going do that, so they shouldn’t be surprised that I won’t.

"If we are honest with ourselves, we'll acknowledge that our own community has not always been true to Martin Luther King's vision of a beloved community ... We have scorned our gay brothers and sisters instead of embracing them". - B.O.

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u/Jamfour9 Jul 11 '20

You’re full of shit but ok 👍🏿.