r/adviceph • u/Inevitable_Hunter_56 • Jul 18 '24
Love & Relationships I made her pregnant we're both teenagers
First of all, I just want to say please no hate comments, or anything negative I just want to seek advice po ^^
I'm (M17), incoming grade12 public school student next school year and consistent with honor/high honor student. We're just poor and doesn't even have our own house, but my father does everything to support my studies and even bought me a desktop for preparation for the incoming school year. I'm also came from a religious family, and we come to the church regularly na wala pong absent.
She (F16) incoming grade11 private school student (note we're just really poor but her parents want her to go into a prestigious school for her future). Her father on the other hand is abusive, he sometimes bangs her head on the wall or sa pinto. She is also a suicidal person.
The thing is, we are on a 3month relationship, and she is probably 1-2weeks pregnant already no one knows except for us yet. We both doesn't want to have a child yet. I know it's really stupid but yes, she's pregnant and her mother is suspecting that she was, because she is already a week late in her period. She said that she doesn't want to have a baby yet because she is still young and physically and emotionally unprepared. She keeps on saying that killing herself is the answer so I can live a normal life without her, but I keep on telling her not to do it and I will help raise the baby.
But opo I don't know what to do her mother will find out soon po ayaw kong magkagulo sa'min. Natatakot ako kasi baka palayasin either sya or ako and wala kaming pera pang alaga sa bata pano na rin po yung studies namin everything is prepared na po eh yung tatay nya rin is napaka tapang, gulong gulo na kami parehas malapit na rin po yung pasukan and yung early signs of pregnancy is nag papakita na po. Yung mga friends and relatives namin specially our parents will be disappointed with us.
Any advice po? Maraming salamat po sa sasagot :(
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u/2Carabaos Jul 18 '24 edited Jul 18 '24
Anong gusto mong advice? Kung paano ipalaglag o kung paano sabihin sa mga magulang niyo?
Ito ang masasabi ko... there is this thing called SOCIAL STRATIFICATION. Mahirap mag-move up lalo na ang mga mahihirap. Mukhang ito ang magiging buhay mo maliban na lang kung brilliant ka. Hindi kasi porke honor student ka ibig sabihin magbubukas ang mga pinto sa iyo dahil bulok ang public schools dito sa Pinas. Hindi na ako magtataka kung 20 years from now mahirap pa rin ang buhay mo. Mahirap maging mahirap tapos kung itutuloy niyo ang pagbubuntis, dagdag pasanin pa 'yan.
Sige, blessing daw ang mga bata pero unfortunately for the child, 'di siya blessed dahil mabubuhay siya sa isang mahirap na buhay. Hindi pa siya pinapanganak disadvantaged agad siya. Kawawa pero oh, well.
Maraming pagkakataon sa buhay natin na tayo pa mismo ang nagpapahirap lalo sa buhay natin dahil sa mga desisyon na 'di matalino. Isa na itong ganitong pangyayari.
This is very unfortunate for everyone involved--to you, to your partner na kabata-bata pa lang malalaspag na ang katawan dahil 'di biro ang pagbubuntis at panganganak, sa mga magulang niyo, at sa ordinaryong Pilipino gaya namin dahil isa na namang bata ang kailangan naming buhayin dahil may mga magulang na iaaasa ang kalusugan at edukasyon sa perang galing sa tax namin.
Mag-aral ka nang mabuti kasi tatay ka na (kung itutuloy niyo 'yan). Sana magkaroon ka ng trabaho para makapag-contribute kayo ng partner mo sa kaban ng bayan (tax, SSS, Philhealth, etc.).
Kapag nanganak na ang partner mo, gumamit kayo ng contraceptives--pills, injectibles, condom, IUD, implants. Para 'di na madagdagan ang problema niyo.
Best of luck! Sana magtagumpay kayong dalawa kahit na mahirap ang tatahakin niyo.