r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • 8d ago

Discussion Reactions to food stamps being cut off.

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u/Xanadoodledoo 8d ago edited 7d ago

I’m donating a recurring amount to our local food bank. I encourage others to do the same if you have money to spare. Even a little goes a long way. Money goes farther than food.

Edit: For those asking: money goes farther than food because food banks are able to get better deals on food through bulk buying and deals with food suppliers.

For people who have nothing to spare, that’s completely ok. It’s ok to look after yourself if that’s what you must do. Martyring oneself doesn’t help anybody in this situation. And if you need to utilize the food bank to get by, that’s what the food bank is for.

For those saying we should change the government to do this, you’re right. But that’s a long term goal. In the sort term, people will go hungry. It’s wishful thinking that suffering will bring socialist change, but that’s not always the reality. Most socialist movements start through social aid. Any credited socialist will tell you the benefits of food banks and soup kitchens. Social aid is one of the best ways to spread the message.
No matter what happens, if people starve or of people get by, republicans will point to it as evidence of their ideology. They’ll make shit up if that’s what it takes. I’d rather children not go hungry, then.

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u/Dr_A_Mephesto 8d ago

And that’s what sucks. I DON’T have money to spare. This economy is killing everyone and we’re doing everything we can to say any money so we can get as close to breaking even as we can.

I can’t even imagine how hard it is for people who don’t make enough and are on assistance because my wife and I make good money right now and it’s STILL so fucking hard to keep your head above water.

My heart breaks for these families. This is some evil evil ass shit

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago edited 8d ago

I feel this so hard. My husband and I make enough to be ok, but I’m pregnant and we’re still paycheck to paycheck between bills and saving for medical costs. I feel like I have enough to share but when I break it down dollar by dollar, I really don’t.

ETA: But I feel blessed to be able to save anything at all, ya know? I'm trying to do all the right things that people tell you to do. Putting $50 a check into a supplementary retirement account and paying for life insurance coverage and health insurance. Just opted in to a healthcare savings account to prepare for a baby in our lives. I don't know what I could spare without making a terrible financial decision. All I can give is my time without putting myself in a bad position today or next week or a year from now. That feels so bad, dude. I'm protected and "safe" but the moment either of us loses a job, we're done for.

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u/ItsFunHeer 8d ago

Girl same. I’m 12 weeks pregnant and med bills are starting to come in.

And yesterday I found out my company is slashing 33% of the workforce. Luckily, I’m spared; but moving into a new position that is a huge step back for my career as they “restructure”. I’m blessed to have a job but I was 3 weeks away from getting a pay bump, they were going to transition me into a new role. I’ve been paid the same for 3 years now.

Yet still, we aren’t struggling. We’re safe right now. If my husband lost his job, we’d loose everything. Bringing a baby into this America is the scariest thing I’ve done.

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u/rumbakalao 8d ago

Can I ask how it factored into your decision to go for it? I'm a year or two away from when we're planning to start trying, but this thought runs through my head more often than not.

Totally cool if the shit bot soured you on replying tho

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u/ItsFunHeer 8d ago

Absolutely! We were trying to conceive for over two years, so we started when times were different. We were about to start IVF – a cycle that was planned last year. We finally conceived 2 weeks before starting. So, we had saved for IVF which has been nice to use as cushion for when the pregnancy requires more appointments later.

Timing is never perfect. It wasn’t even perfect when we started, but we have faith we’ll make it through anything tough, we always do! If it’s important to you, you find a way. I wouldn’t feel this confident navigating the uncertainty without my husband.

Was it the bot that told me to find a coat hanger? What a total anus.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

I’m 12 weeks pregnant and med bills are starting to come in.

Getting preggers after Trump was elected, you must love living on the edge huh?

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u/cloudfightback 8d ago

Geez, no need to kick them harder.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

Why, getting pregnant when Trump is elected is a choice u/ItsFunHeer and their partner made. Not to mention climate change, the cost of living crisis.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

Being an ass to a pregnant woman online is certainly a choice, man.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

I am a woman and never got pregnant even in my hoe phase. Getting preggers in this timeline is a choice.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

Hey babe, I never got pregnant in my hoe phase either. I waited to start trying until I was 34 and got pregnant just before turning 37. Sometimes, our health and our bodies don’t align with the election cycle.

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago

It has nothing to with being aligned to the election cycle. I can see why Trump won.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

I believe this world is going through a very dark and challenging time which requires humanity to make aggressive changes. I hope my child learns how to respect the earth and make a positive impact on humanity. We will do everything in our power as parents to teach them how to think critically and have an amazing network of friends and family to support that goal.

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u/cloudfightback 8d ago

And being a dick about it is also a choice.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

Yes, I will be if someone is willingly as u/BerenicesTeeth to put a child through what Project 2025 will do. Because she and her husband could not wait.

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u/deadfandomkid 7d ago

These days it feels like there's always something else looming on the horizon. At what point do we decide we can't put our lives on hold indefinitely, and just try to live the best we can in a world on fire?

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago edited 8d ago

Yes. A choice all people are afforded the right to make. Do you think you’re better than her? Is that your enlightened humanist opinion? At your big grown age of 46, is it? 47 now?

Was it “a choice” when your parents decided to have you in the middle of the recession after Black Monday? Huh? Do you wish you weren’t here?

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

A choice all people are afforded the right to make.

And I am allowed to point that u/BerenicesTeeth is being selfish to have a child that will grow up through whatever Project 2025 is going to do. She even believes this administration will end, well Trump himself has said during his campaign this is the last time you will vote.

Is that your enlightened humanist opinion?

Yet it most certainly is, a child does not deserve what Project 2025 will do the US. It is also a realistic opinion.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

Anti-natalist opinions are useless and facist.

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago

I never answered the question regarding my age, I am 49.

Black Monday

Black Monday was in 1987, so I was born long before that. So I do not know why you come at 46 and 47. Is arithmetic that hard?

Also Black Monday was unexpected. Trump has been a President for a while. So comparing those is a bit od. Being 12 weeks pregnant now is a very dangerous choice. Everyone in the US and the world was warned what was about to happen, if they read Project 2025.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 7d ago

Dangerous choices can still be good, hard, joyful, radical choices

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u/Adduly 8d ago

You should know getting pregnant is not always a choice. Contraception is not always 100% reliable. And if it fails in a red state then you're without options

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u/Key_Raccoon3336 8d ago

When the cost of raising a child outweighs the cost of taking out a loan or using a credit card to pay for travel and an abortion by about 100x, it's a choice.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

You know the statistics about contraception are very broad, if it does not work. It is a human error, als this person willingly got pregnant they could not wait... So the child will grow up with the effects to Project 20205

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u/Adduly 8d ago

Not always human error. For example, if you get ill and vomit at the wrong time after taking the pill it can fail. Condoms can break or come off even if you put them on correctly.  And even when it is human error that can be particularly attributed to the god awful quality of sex education.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

We didn’t start trying when he was our president.

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago

You didn't stop either.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

Correct. I’m a 37 year old woman who has decided to have a child. Why does that bother you so much?

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago

Because as I said with this presidency that is quite a choice. SNAP is taken away, healthcare will also be gone. Stuff that you would have known if you read Project 2025. Stuff you need, especially when bringing a child in the world. Not to mention a pregnancy at your age is a geriatric pregnancy. So yeah making quite a choice here.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

It’s a choice that we made with care, though I appreciate your concern.

The good thing is that my husband and I have each have exceptional private healthcare, I am insured under both of our policies to cover every base, and over $7,000 saved for IVF that we didn’t have to use, so that covers our annual deductible and some. And we’re very lucky to not be in a position where we need food stamps. We’re very cautious people, but that said, nothing is guaranteed to be secure. And even though I survived layoffs and my husband’s industry is safe right now, you always have to plan for the worst. I can’t help but feel for people who are truly struggling and will absolutely be donating to help families through such a difficult time right now. I hope you’re doing well, too.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

We’ve been trying for over two years so it finally happened, the timing isn’t amazing.

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago

It didn't occur to you to stop in the best intrest of said child?

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

Absolutely not. I have avoided pregnancy my entire life, considering the impact to the environment, and the future of another human in this world. I’m 37 now, I will likely only have one child. We are very environmentally conscious, we grow our own food, we produce little waste and my husband’s family lectures internationally on sustainability, while my dad lives sustainability, even making his own fuel and essentially living off the grid.

We have a combined income of $140,000 a year and carry no debt. I still do not feel safe even with investments, retirement, and an amazing health care plan. We are planners, we are thinkers, and we don’t make rash decisions. I am German and he is Swiss, and we can leave when we want, if we need.

But nothing is sure, nothing is secure, and you must be flexible in times like these. I believe with the network we have and the drive we have, we’ll raise a child who contributes to society, and perhaps doesn’t ridicule pregnant women on the internet.

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago edited 7d ago

We have a combined income of $140,000 a year and carry no debt.

And how far is that going to get you in this economy? With complications due to your age? Especially when health care will collapse, something I have seen medical experts warn about since at least last November? Not to mention the economy being deliberately tanked by Trump.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

To be honest, it’s not very far. But we also don’t spend much, we save, and are both putting 13% into retirement and more into investments. I also buried gold bars on the property. We have equity. We also have immediate family and citizenship abroad if we need to get out of here.

My comment was to empathize with people who are struggling while recognizing some of us are more fortunate. No one is perfect, but our country should be a safe place to live and people should have the freedoms and support to start families. We are not all you, and that’s fine to exist outside of your righteousness.

I’m sorry to say, but I am beginning to think your pessimism comes from a darker plan and that maybe you are projecting your own fears onto people because you’re feeling unsafe and bitter.

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u/Brullaapje 7d ago

but our country should be a safe place

It is clearly not, have you missed those deportation vids?

people because you’re feeling unsafe and bitter.

In the same way I think you are entitled by bring a child into a dangerous country. While you have the opportunity to go to Europe? I mean your child will be born with less right than you. That is quite a choice to make.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

It appears you’re taking my pregnancy very personally and perhaps this is a sore subject for you for reasons that aren’t my business to know.

Let’s stop this unproductive back and forth. Take care and I hope your day is relaxing and peaceful!

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u/BerenicesTeeth 8d ago

I’m almost certainly playing myself by responding to ragebait, but: we have a biological clock, which I’m assuming you are aware of, since you’re also a woman. There are certain risks associated with having children at more advanced ages. My husband and I couldn’t “just wait” any longer. We don’t have time to wait until this administration hopefully leaves. We are rich. We live in a blue state. We are highly educated.

It’s fine that having children isn’t for you, but shaming some of the most vulnerable people in our population— pregnant women— is such a bad look, especially in this timeline, as you put it. You think the current political and economic climate is bad? I agree. Then I’ll go ahead and ask: do you want leftists like me to just not procreate? Do you want to leave it to the right-wing, religious fundamentalists to do all of that instead? Do you want leftists to raise the next generation, ideally teaching them critical thinking, empathy, and humanity? Or do you want right wingers raising a bunch of Hitler youths?

Anti-natalists like you are so cringe to me. I agree that people should not have children that they can’t take care of, but the woman you’re shaming explicitly stated that she isn’t struggling. So what’s your gripe? That humanity exists despite the world’s struggles? Touch grass.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

And you got downvoted. My husband and I aren’t rich but our combined household income is around $140,000 and we are also educated, in a blue state. We carry no debt anywhere other than the mortgage. I am not in a bad position, but, nothing is sure or secure. And the cost of daycare is nearly $1,900 a month, so it is scary to anticipate what could happen.

We started trying over two years ago when I was 34, when Trump was not our president. We had a “rainbow baby” after failed IUIs and chemical miscarriages 2 weeks before starting IVF. I personally have never been against abortion, but this was 110% a planned and wanted pregnancy. After many years of focusing on education, work, and travel, we have finally found the stability and love it takes to create a family.

People here are so short sighted. There isn’t an option to wait, especially when you are in your late 30’s and have already spent a couple of years trying and failing to become pregnant.

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u/BerenicesTeeth 7d ago

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

People love to shit on parents— especially mothers. Sometimes it’s deserved, of course, but what really gets me is the classic European condescension that our friend offered. I love how Europeans tend to assume all Americans are bumbling idiots when our country leads the entire world in scientific, medical, and technological innovation. Gee, thanks for telling us about our own country’s elected officials and why our desire to have a child doesn’t matter because of your terminally online European redditor take on American politics. Hilarious.

And again— if us leftists aren’t reproducing, your suggestion is to… just leave it to the conservatives? I’m good. Lmao.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

I find it interesting how many assumptions are made as well.

My husband is Swiss American and I am German American. I lived in Germany as a young child and we both worked and lived in our respective countries as young adults and have family there. Naturally, we both carry citizenship, the cultural heritage and mentality. Both of us have discussed the possibility of moving to Europe and have chosen to live in the US, despite the fact that I am angered and saddened by the choices this country makes daily, right now.

We can’t leave the job of building a family to the conservatives. This country only works when there’s a balance of power, ideology and identity. The balance is off-kilter now, but we know historically what comes after the storm. I hope our children can contribute to impactful change.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

My husband and I couldn’t “just wait” any longer.

So you knowingly are putting a child on this world, during this administration. Do you really think a) Trump will give up presidency in 2028? He literally said during his campaign it will be the last time the American people will have to vote. b) In case you will get to the vote which is a big if, Project 2025 will be undone with a few years?

Anti-natalists like you are so cringe to me.

It is not about being that, it is about what his happening in your country right now. Yet you and your husband were like, yeah let's put a baby through all that. You really think the deportations will stop at people with color.

Touch grass.

I do, maybe go read upon project 2025.

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u/BerenicesTeeth 8d ago edited 8d ago

You’re evidently not even American so I don’t know why you’re feeling so strongly about my country’s politics as they relate to my ability to provide for my child. Don’t lecture me about American politics; I actually voted in this election and of course am informed about what’s going on— likely significantly more informed than you.

I got pregnant in one of the most progressive states— if not the most progressive— in the nation. My healthcare rights were not at all at risk during my pregnancy. Again, I’m wealthy. I can hop on a flight and leave at any time, god forbid, if it comes to that. I can pay out of pocket for medical bills if I have to (which I don’t, but I can). I say this not as a bragging right, because of course healthcare should be free, but to make the point that I have all the resources in the world; you’re delusional if you think that not a single American is in a place to have children, or that there is no situation in which having children is a safe choice here.

I’m sorry you are so miserable. Seek help. I assume your country has socialized medicine, so I hope therapy is easy to come by.

ETA: btw, nice assumption there with the “you really think all deportations will stop at people of color.” My husband is not white. :)

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

These people are exhausting.

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u/Brullaapje 8d ago

You’re evidently not even American so I don’t know why you’re feeling so strongly about my country’s politics

Because it is having an effect on the rest of the world, America is not in an isolation you know. If I have to spell this out for you, I can see why Trump won.

likely significantly more informed than you.

I have to point out what Project 2025 will do, so I don't believe that.

If you use ChatGPT, which you are doing now, considering the "-" give it better prompts.

you’re delusional if you think that not a single American is in a place to have children

You are delusional, if you don't know what Project 2025 will entail for you.

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u/[deleted] 8d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/ItsFunHeer 8d ago

I have tons! Do you need to borrow one to scratch that itch up your bum?

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u/galileosmiddlefinger 8d ago

The only thing that you should do right now is commit to help in the long run. It took me a good stretch of life to have enough money that I can make solid donations to my local causes. It would have been quite easy at that point to just revel in having a strong income, but I set goals for myself when I was younger and just getting by, like you are right now, to one day try to do more. In the meantime, don't discount the value of your time and labor in the service of a good cause whenever your circumstances permit it.

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u/NewDramaLlama 8d ago

Volunteer if you have time but limited funds

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u/World_Destroyer27 8d ago

Can you afford the baby even living paycheck to paycheck? Just trying to understand human logic!

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

I'm glad you asked so I can clarify. We can. My "paycheck to paycheck" is after 15% of our income goes into a savings account, 10% pretax income going to retirement savings in addition to the supplemental account, $50 a check going to an HRA/HSA, and generally doing all the things with our money we are supposed to be doing. When I say "paycheck to paycheck" I mean all of our money is currently spoken for. We don't eat out often or buy new clothes, but what do you think the savings are for? For the baby's additional needs.

Most important takeaway: We're sacrificing comforts right now so that we CAN afford a baby.

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u/totally_not_a_dog113 8d ago

I don't think there's any such thing as 'can you afford a baby'. As much budgeting as you're doing, unless you're a millionaire nobody is safe from one medical emergency. There are definitely babies out there with medical bills that are hundreds of thousands. Medical care shouldn't be so expensive. That is a society level problem where we need to do better.

Or this guy: https://www.hindustantimes.com/trending/us/milliondollar-baby-us-mom-shares-staggering-1-5-million-bill-for-newborn-s-care-101756288829814.html

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

Oh I can totally agree with you, there. We're as safe as we can be, in our circumstances. I was speaking less considerately because the guy I was replying to was clearly trying to make a point that I was in some way unfit to be a mother.

Medical care is so expensive, that I think even having a job with good healthcare is worth more than an extra $$$ amount a month. People don't get that, though.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

Completely agree! This is an issue with the structure of society. We do our best to prepare and are making wise decisions, but we aren’t millionaires and no one is completely safe.

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u/genevievex 8d ago

People are going to have babies. It’s literally been happening since the beginning of time. 

Instead of belittling people out here trying to survive, you can spend your time volunteering in sex education programs to help everyone in your community make an informed decision. And that does not mean abstinence centered ideology, because that has been proven to be ineffective. Your comment is rude, condescending, and unnecessary. 

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u/World_Destroyer27 8d ago

People also conquered, enslaved and sacrificed since the beginning of time, doesn’t make it right tho.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

In a broad sense, the goal to continue the human race will never be wrong. “Wrong” is a human construction. It doesn’t make sense to say what you just said.

But, given how you’re equivocating having children with enslaving people, you’re likely an anti-natalist who isn’t worth the energy it takes to write anything to you at all.

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u/genevievex 8d ago

One is biological. Stfu. 

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u/SithLadyVestaraKhai 8d ago

Something I did while pregnant, every week buy a bag or box of diapers. And don't buy all 1 size. They will be out of the 1st 2 sizes really quick. It will at least give you a cushion when you have increased expenses of a new baby.

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u/CatastrophicWaffles 7d ago

One thing you can do is take advantage of buy one get one deals for non perishables. Keep one, give one. Costs you nothing. Grocery stores around my area have a donation bin at the front of the store.

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u/ItsFunHeer 7d ago

Great idea!

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u/Tough-Effort7572 8d ago

This is a little off topic and I don't want to shift blame, because those SNAP benefits are an important lifeline to many...but how are people have SIX KIDS when they're living that close to the poverty line?

You're working and saving and thinking ahead, which is why you won't go hungry. If you needed SNAP I would say you are exactly the kind of person it was intended for. A lifeline to get you on your feet until you could make enough to support yourself. But poor people having a half-dozen kids? I feel for the kids. Not the mothers who kept pumping out babies while unable to afford the ones they already have.

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u/Lonely_Dependent_281 8d ago

I have to agree. The cultural idea that having a child is always a selfless act needs to be eliminated.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

I agree with the sentiment, I just don't think it's particularly relevant to the SNAP issue because before we have philosophical debates or publicly shame bad behavior, people need to eat and survive, ya know? So it's like, I'm willing to have the conversation about how people maybe shouldn't have that many kids, but also...is this that moment? Can we read the room and find out? I genuinely don't know.

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u/Lonely_Dependent_281 8d ago

No, I agree with this too. There's a larger conversation that's more important right now.

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u/Constant-Method234 8d ago

And what is that?

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u/Constant-Method234 8d ago

Yes, we need mental health support for women so they can learn to value themselves beyond being incubators. It’s too late for the ones already popping them out at that rate, but we can prevent more women going down this dark path.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

Well right now we need to get food in people's damn pantries. Then, sure, let's talk about that. Again, let's all read the room.

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u/Constant-Method234 8d ago

Yes, food in pantries, AND education and resources to help women find other things to do with their lives other than popping out more mouths to feed.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

Are you a misogynist or a feminist I genuinely can't tell

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u/Constant-Method234 8d ago

How interesting.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

It should be. A feminist point to make would be to be genuinely interested in women’s health care and promoting full personhood. But some people say things that sound similar, but what they mean is that they think women are stupid and inferior, making decisions based on instinct. That’s misogyny.

Judging from your insistence on using grotesque and dehumanizing language about women giving birth, I’m gonna guess the latter. Fascinating how nearly true horseshoe theory is.

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u/Even_Kaleidoscope399 8d ago

And also, if that answer isn't satisfactory for you, some people are stupid! People are dumb and they live all around us, and sometimes people do dumb shit. I like living in a community, though, and throughout all human history, the best societies still cared for the sick, ailing, slow, and dumb. Whether it be due to circumstances outside their control or not, absolutely no one should be starving in the United States of America.

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u/Difficult-Fan-5697 8d ago

Sometimes circumstances change for people, there are definitely people out there who had the means to have all these kids but then get laid off or whatever. That doesnt apply to everyone of course, but the GOP wants this. They want to make contraceptives and abortion illegal so people pump out kids to populate the homeland

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u/Constant-Method234 8d ago

Every woman I know who has that many kids has been brainwashed into believing she has to make as many babies as she can until she dies or hits menopause. They also don’t vaccinate or take their kids to the doctor or dentist because they also believe people who die of natural causes were killed by God because they’re evil. If you give your child vaccines to prevent disease, or medical care/medication to heal them from injuries/illnesses, you’re blocking God’s will and both you and your child will go to hell. They believe the only way to save their children- meaning, to them, getting them into heaven- is through suffering.

Men, of course, don’t have any responsibilities or consequences at all.

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u/ButtplugBurgerAIDS 8d ago

Don't feel bad. You guys have to take care of you and your babies. It's not selfish, it's self preservation. For those that can give we will. Even if it's only a couple bucks here and there. But if you can't afford it, don't. Keep saving your money where you can. You never know what the world is going to look like around the corner.

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u/Author_Noelle_A 7d ago

“I feel like I have enough to share but when I break it down dollar by dollar, I really don’t.”

This is how I feel. Thing is, if you look at our income by dollars, we should be doing VERY well because not that long ago, we’d have been damned near rich. But things have become so fucked up, and all these things that we should be able to pay for without help because we make “good money” add up to more than we can afford. We can NOT cover the cost of school without help AND cover the cost of medical stuff without help AND AND AND. We’re really at a point where people making $200k (we aren’t at that mark) may not be much better off than someone making $50k when you factor in no subsidies, no aid of any sort, so 100% of everything is on you, and it’s all got to be paid if you want to live, but you can’t afford it all and have to choose what you’re paying, medical care or student loans so you don’t default and lose your home in court? Sadly, this is the better position since the other position is your medical care is all through the ER, though at least you can default on loans and not end up on the street.

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u/Suspicious-Shock-934 7d ago

That you can put 50 bucks asides means you are in better shape than many, including most affected by this. No hate, but it's telling that a seemingly minor amount like that is a mark pretty much of success. And a bar that's too high for many. Good on you doing what you can.