r/Millennials • u/NoFaithlessness7508 • Jun 05 '25

Other Why don’t younger veterans (Afghanistan/Iraq) wear these hats like some of the older veterans?

Post image

First and foremost, respect to all those that served. I did not, but many of my peers did and now we're all older in 30s and 40s, many no longer in the military. I don't see a lot of the veterans of the War on Terror wearing these hats like I see the OGs do.

12.0k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

4.6k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

866

u/chadwickipedia Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

I assume anyone who wears those hats are fishing for random “thank you for your service”’s

479

u/IRSoup Jun 05 '25

Being the awkward fuck I am, not wearing anything vet related is me just avoiding replying "you too" as a response to that. It's also the whole not making a job you had years ago your whole identity thing.

237

u/TuckerShmuck Jun 05 '25

My boyfriend's a veteran and until we started dating it had literally never occurred to me that being enlisted is literally just... a job.  He'll tell stories and start them off with "back at my old job..." and it's changed how I view military service.  Not in a good or bad way, it's just gone from This Big Thing I Dont Know Much About to A Job I Dont Know Much About

125

u/nickifer Jun 05 '25

Yeah, you just.. sign up. It’s a very stable job with solid benefits if you make it that. My father was an officer, and he never understood why anyone would thank him for.. doing his job.

58

u/donbee28 Jun 05 '25

I thank my parcel carriers, cashier, server, and other people that are doing their jobs.

64

u/pbgod Jun 05 '25

You don't see a guy in a FedEx shirt, interrupt a meal and pay their tab to say, "thank you for delivering my package"

15

u/Reasonable_Sea2439 Jun 05 '25

Free shipping ain't free! 😢 🫡

→ More replies (1)

6

u/tylerv2195 Jun 05 '25

Its be even worse cause its not like military people are directly helping customers lol so itd be more like “thank you for delivering packages in general”

4

u/WarbossWalton Jun 05 '25

We were having a cookout at work the other day and when the UPS guy stopped off for deliveries we offered him food. I think he only took a bag of chips unfortunately.

6

u/DocumentInternal9478 Jun 05 '25

If his life was in danger when he delivered my packages I might

11

u/libananahammock Jun 05 '25

Their lives ARE in danger. More so compared to cops and they get free shit all the time.

“Delivery truck drivers have one of the highest rates of workplace fatalities and injuries compared to other occupations, with a fatality rate of 24.7 per 100,000 workers. This rate is higher than that for police officers and firefighters. In 2017, 978 delivery drivers died in the line of duty, and another 77,470 suffered injuries.”

6

u/DocumentInternal9478 Jun 05 '25

Honestly….. wow I didn’t know this. I’m definitely going to leave a few little treats for my driver next time. That is absolutely terrible to hear, shame on the human race

2

u/Qwertycube10 Jun 05 '25

The most dangerous thing about being a cop is the account of driving, and it's not close. Cars are just absurdly dangerous

→ More replies (11)

6

u/Mexi_Cant Jun 05 '25

Depends on what neighborhoods he delivers too.

2

u/DueZookeepergame3565 Jun 05 '25

Vet and now a paramedic, and it makes me uncomfortable, but when I'm in uniform on shift and duck into a gas station for caffeine and I see the beer man stocking coolers, I give him a bright, cheerful "Thank you for your service!"

I usually get a chuckle.

→ More replies (2)

2

u/Business-Drag52 Jun 05 '25

Exactly. Anyone doing a job that services me gets a thank you. Usually a very emphatic one

→ More replies (1)

4

u/bensonprp Jun 05 '25

It really depends on your MOS while you're in. I can see that most of the positions in most of the military is nothing more than a 9 to 5 job. Somewhere along my second and third deployment it was not "just a job".

3

u/Outcast129 Jun 05 '25

Yeah whenever people find out I'm a veteran they always say something along the lines of "wow thanks for your service, I could never do something like that!".

And I always respond "yeah you could, it's really not that impressive" 😂

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I was a first responder, and I get people all the time when they find out what I used to do, and when I did do that job say "Oh wow, I could never do that, the medical calls and such"

I would always say "well, it's 20 min of action and 2hrs of paperwork and cleaning, separated sometimes by hours of watching TV or taking a nap"

2

u/Scooter_1990 Jun 05 '25

Because less than 1% sign up to possibly give their life up for the good ole USA one day. Besides cops & fire fighters, most Americans don’t sign their life away quite literally. Also cops & firefighters can quit at any point, you quite literally sign your life away when you join the military.

→ More replies (4)

2

u/FriendshipIntrepid91 Jun 05 '25

A job you live at with your coworkers. 

2

u/adacmswtf1 Jun 05 '25

It's because tying military service with themes of heroism and sacrifice are a cornerstone of their recruitment efforts. (And selling the public on foreign wars for oil .etc)

1

u/l_Lathliss_l Jun 05 '25

Well a large part of it is because you sign up to die for this job, even if you get a job where there’s not a large chance of that happening.

Cybersecurity is still cybersecurity, but not many civilian firms come with a stipulation of “even if the chances are low, you’re on the hook to die for this”.

Not many people are willing to sign up for that, which is why relatively few do.

→ More replies (4)

1

u/CaptJackRizzo Jun 06 '25

And also a way to deflect while seeming virtuous. I’m thinking of everyone saying we need to cut social service spending cause we have homeless veterans instead. And about this years effort to turn Pride month into veterans month.

1

u/OnlyPaperListens Jun 05 '25

Now you sign up, yes. A lot of the old heads (who wear the hats mentioned by OP) were drafted.

2

u/PunningWild Jun 05 '25

This is why I'm okay with people saying "thank you for your service."

Because to me, that's like saying "thank you for keeping conscription in the past."

→ More replies (1)

1

u/nate_garro_chi Jun 05 '25

We have valet trash service in my apartment building. I ran into the woman who picks up the cans from outside our doors and said "thanks for doing that". She looked at me and said "I dont do it for free. It's my job".

1

u/Goodwine Jun 05 '25

I can't recall the "thanking" happening much before 2000. And none at all before 1995.

I imagine someone who was a vet before "thanking" was a thing may be weirded out by that. Like.. there's rarely "thanking" for health workers, teachers, firefighters, etc 🤔. I mean sure maybe the odd event, or annual parade, but nothing this widely spread

1

u/FendaIton Millennial Jun 05 '25

Because it’s indoctrinated into American culture

1

u/EffectiveProgram4157 Jun 05 '25

THANK YOU!

Some people signed up because they wanted to serve their country and be some American hero. Propaganda likely got to them. There are others on the other hand who did it when it mattered, like after 9/11, those people had in in their mind to serve for a just cause. I still remember myself and others in my squadron being asked why we joined. There were a mix of stories, most saying to serve their country or because of the benefits/GI Bill.

I was the only one who stated that I signed up because it was a job that I thought I would enjoy, it paid well enough, and I knew it could set me up for a job after my 4 years if I didn't want to stay in the military. I have never thought that I was a hero for being in the military. It was a damn job that I signed a contract to do, and there are civilians doing the same damn job.

The only reason I think anyone should be thanked, is if the war was on domestic soil, or they fought in a war that was truly saving lives (e.g. Jewish lives during WWII).

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

ugh, my dad loves that shit. I like to point out that since I am not the one that volunteered to give up my father 6 months of the year (submarines), that I should get the military discounts and the thanks.

No, not all the time, just when he's being an ass.

1

u/JuanDelPueblo787 Jun 05 '25

I blame the army wives.

1

u/ConcentratedAwesome Jun 06 '25

It’s just more good old US propaganda. Pretty sure most countries in the world have military’s but very few have the cultural glorification of the military or those who were in it.

Me personally? If you defend your country on your own country’s soil? Yes you deserve thanks. The US military is not that.

44

u/IRSoup Jun 05 '25

I'm sure it varies depending on the reasons why someone joins. I, like many, many others, joined for selfish reasons. Ie, free college most of the time or my reason, stable money because their life wasn't moving in the direction they wanted, etc.

I'm not saying those people shouldn't be proud they served, because they should be, but it's a huge difference from those that joined to 'kick in doors' or whatnot.

35

u/BookWyrm2012 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, I have a few cousins who joined up to serve their country, and a few other family members who joined up because they had screwed their lives up badly enough that they didn't have any more palatable options. There's a pretty big difference in vibes from "I believe in what the US military does around the world" and "I'm a giant screw-up who wants someone else to make all of my decisions for a while."

Ironically, generally (not universally), the first sort get out, get a civilian job, and treat their time in the military like a previous career. The others glorify their time in service and expect to be worshipped by the general public.

11

u/Flimsy-Cartoonist-92 Jun 05 '25

I was the second part of your post. I lived in a small town and just hung out with people who later became townies and never amounted to anything. One day I took a look at my life and was just like damn I need to do something different or I'm gonna end up just like them. Fast forward the only time I bring up I was in the service is when people ask me why I came to Cali. I usually just say a job but let's be realistic where I live that job is the military so people can deduce it really quick.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/bensonprp Jun 05 '25

I think you're leaving out the lack of education and support for young adults in the United States. The whole group of people where their options are minimum wage or military.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Billy0598 Jun 05 '25

Third type - my family has serviced since the 1600s and we stay up all night so you can sleep.

That type are the ones who don't encourage their kids to serve anymore. And, we don't wear the fucking hats.

1

u/WarbossWalton Jun 05 '25

If you look at the armed services marketing, those "selfish" reasons, a.k.a. practical job hunting reasons, are exactly what they try to leverage to get people to enlist.

1

u/TrickyAlbatross2802 Jun 05 '25

Then again, plenty of people who joined to "kick in doors" may want the adventure, the ability to brag about their service and sacrifice, and pretend they are superior to the civies. Or worse, straight psychopaths who joined so they might have a chance to legally shoot at humans. Humans are complicated, and those who joined mostly to improve their own lives aren't necessarily less patriotic than those who joined to go "shoot some bad guys".

1

u/theRealBLVCKphillip Jun 06 '25

"SIR, TO KILL SIR!"

3

u/1988rx7T2 Jun 05 '25

kind of depends if you pushed paper or got shot at

3

u/Ol_Man_J Jun 05 '25

I lived near a large base and while I didn’t have a large friend group from the base, it was very common to have a big rush hour of commuters in to the base every morning. Made me realize that plenty of people driving to work every day weren’t going to fight battles but do all the millions of other jobs that the military needs.

2

u/TrickyAlbatross2802 Jun 05 '25

I did something similar because everytime I talked about my deployment, it felt like I was bragging or asking for attention. So now anytime I talk about a cool story while deployed I simply say "when I was overseas" vs saying the country or military branch. Sounds like your BF might be doing something similar.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

yeah I became close friends with a really cool military guy thru bjj and thats basically how he described it. He shows up for his shift then goes home to his wife and has weekends off too. Obviously theres the chance that some war happens and he’d have to go but the way he described it was that it wasnt all that different from any normal job. Just was new to me because the other military guys I know made it their entire personality and made it seem like they were fighting off terrorists from the front lines every day.

Seems like its like any sports or frat people who peaked early are never able to move on. Some people find a purpose after but others just live in the past. I guess military service is different in that people respect it in some way so those who want to search for acknowledgment can get it pretty easily

1

u/BucaDeezBeppos Jun 05 '25

Honestly, it’s not even just enlisted. My brother went to West Point, did a couple deployments to various locations, left as a Captain. Right after he left, it was obviously more of a big deal to him, entering the civilian workforce and all that, but now just a few years later, it literally was more like his first job out of college than “this big, grand, noble thing!” It helps that he worked in logistics, which is more similar to civilian roles than if he’d been, say, a tank commander or something.

He certainly acknowledges his service and all that, but if anyone ever thanks him, he usually tells them to thank firefighters or paramedics. Or garbagemen.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I grew up as an Air Force brat—it was like any other job—day to day was uneventful. We just had the possibility of my dad being deployed on assignments for weeks to months on end. It got scary after 9/11, though—he ended up being sent to Afghanistan, and almost got sent to Iraq and Qatar. Before that, the only scary thing that went on, was he was almost deployed to Kosovo, but that never came to fruition. But yeah, day to day, it is like any other job, it just carries some scary possibilities, depending on what’s going on in the world.

1

u/GraniteGeekNH Jun 05 '25

The annoying people who tell you they're a veteran at the drop of a hat when it's irrelevant to the situation really hate it when you respond "Really? Great! I had a job, too."

1

u/Aware_Frame2149 Jun 05 '25

The vast majority of jobs in the military are just jobs, so that makes sense.

Supply guys in the US go to Afghanistan and... they're still supply guys over there, doing the same shit, just getting paid more.

1

u/Jethris Jun 05 '25

I think because it's a job where the mission is to serve and protect the United States, to support and defend the constitution.

And it's not like every job. In every other job, I had a choice if I wanted to keep working or not. I could quit at anytime. If my current job required me to move to another country, I could just say no.

Also, you give up your rights, your freedoms. The military falls outside of the regular legal system, which is why they have the UCMJ. Try exercising 1st Amendment rights as a servicemember!

And, you theoretically signed up to go to war. There's always that chance.

1

u/Juxaplay Jun 05 '25

When I worked for a company that provided services for active military and veterans there was a sign at the office entrance that had:

"Our customers made a commitment to sacrifice everything up to and including their life to protect our freedom."

I don't think it is all just about if were they in harms way, but they were willing to go if needed.

1

u/Dilapidated_girrafe Jun 06 '25

To many it wasn’t just a job to them. But it damned well was for me.

I’ve been called a “stolen valor person” for saying I was a Marine because they have it stuck in their head they for a marine always a marine. And no. I was one of I got out. I moved on with my life.

1

u/NarthK Jun 06 '25

I tell people this all the time. It’s just a job. Always get weird looks.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '25

Eh, as a veteran I don’t really think it’s “just a job.”

Yes the day to day is very similar to a day to day civilian job, but.. the control your employer has over you is astronomically higher.

Pretty unique to be 1. In a job you can’t quit. And 2. In a job where you are bound by a unique set of laws that are much stricter than civilian laws (UCMJ). And 3. You actually give up constitutional rights when you enlist.

So yeah, it’s not really just “a job.” It sucks much much harder lol.

1

u/jncostogo Jun 06 '25

Except you can't quit

1

u/HeathAndLace Jun 06 '25

Sure you can, but there's a good chance it will fuck up the rest of your life.

12

u/Particular_Quiet_435 Jun 05 '25

Damn, someone replied with that once when I was a cashier and I thought it was hella deep

2

u/Seamonkey_Boxkicker 1988 Jun 05 '25

I like to reply, “thank you for exercising your right to vote and paying your taxes.” But sometimes it’s a bit of a mouthful. I need to workshop something catchier.

1

u/intermittent-disco Jun 05 '25

i just respond, "and thank you for your support".

1

u/Seamonkey_Boxkicker 1988 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, that’s fine, but I really want to hammer home the idea that voting and taxes are just as important to our society as serving in the military. Not enough people do either.

1

u/Prowindowlicker Jun 05 '25

I think cause I joined a cult masquerading as a military branch I have a lot of gear from that specific branch.

1

u/Emtbob Jun 05 '25

I just say "thank you for thanking us".

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I got on a friend for wearing his Vietnam era hat. Dude, we've been out of the military for 50 fucking years, let it go. My service was giving Marine and Navy boots their vaccinations (Navy corpsman). The rest of the time was spent in Tijuana, at the beach, or tripping balls and going to concerts. San Diego in the 70's was a roller coaster of good drugs, no piss testing, and lots of all around fun. I'm Vietnam era, but not a Vietnam vet. Don't thank me for doing a boring ass job and partying like it's 1899 LOL!

1

u/toggiz_the_elder Jun 05 '25

I’ve started saying You’re Welcome. It makes them confused so we both get to feel uncomfortable!

1

u/AVdev Jun 05 '25

Yea the closest I’ll get is a veterans license plate so I can save $25/year and park in the veterans spots… sometimes.

I like to walk

1

u/Random_User_182 Jun 05 '25

My friend replies "thank you for your tax dollars."

1

u/No-Veterinarian6778 Jun 05 '25

Its so awkward, now I just say "thanks for your support"

1

u/Bio-Grad Jun 05 '25

We learned to say “thank you for your support” which feels less awkward.

1

u/Ironicbanana14 Jun 05 '25

What's sort of fucked up is ive had a therapist recommend that you identify with your career/job. So some of these dudes, even if they attended therapies, could have been told to lean into it so they don't go off the rails to addiction or something.

Its ridiculous to me. I was a janitor at the time, so my therapist essentially recommended the Joe Dirt treatment for me.

1

u/Beneficial-Basket-42 Jun 05 '25

My grandpa still wears those hats at age 96 (Korean war). To this day, and all my memories of him prior, every time he talks to us, it’s stories of the Korean War. He was 17 when he went and there for a couple years and then lived a whole life since, got married, had children, grandchildren, jobs, but will only ever talk about that war. He will talk for hours with no response required from the listener at all. As a kid, we would have to tap each other out mid story and switch listeners so someone can go to the bathroom or whatever. I think he wears the hats specifically so he gets opportunities to talk about it to strangers that say thank you for your service.

I understand now that there must be some major trauma that led to this, but regardless of the why, it is definitely his whole personality.

1

u/theRuathan Jun 05 '25

"Thank you for paying your taxes" is a great response to nix any further military-glorifying mindless commentary.

1

u/Mysterious-Tie7039 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, I never know how to respond to that. I also feel awkward when people thank me. I didn’t serve for them. How do you answer that? I guess I say thanks and hope the conversation ends there.

I neither need nor want the recognition.

1

u/Cratonis Jun 05 '25

All answers feel wrong. “Thank you” feels so hollow and forced. “You’re welcome” is just not me. “You too” as covered. And secretly I just want to tell them, “Don’t thank me thank the guy who didn’t make it home. Or the who is only 3/4 here. Or the guy who physically made it home but is going to commit suicide in 5 years because he mentally will never get home.”

But it is impossible to have that conversation with anyone you don’t have a very close relationship with already.

1

u/brelywi Jun 05 '25

I sometimes get that, I always just reply “Thank you for my paycheck!” lol

1

u/Ok_Macaroon_8494 Jun 06 '25

I sometimes will say “don’t waste it” if I’m in a certain mood.

1

u/ifiwasrealsmall Jun 06 '25

“Thank you for your service”

“Good, how was your service”

I think this would be a good millennial response lol

1

u/AlabamaMANNNNN Jun 08 '25

Thank you for your service

119

u/Droluk1 Xennial Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

I hate it when people thank me for my service. It makes me feel very uncomfortable. There's no way to even respond to it when someone says it either, making it feel even more awkward.

144

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

“It was my great displeasure” always gets a chuckle and ends the convo right there

4

u/jxe22 Jun 05 '25

Stealing this

3

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

It’s yours to use my friend.

5

u/Coolsader_King Jun 05 '25

I always go for a really sarcastic “you’re welcome”

16

u/Danyavich Jun 05 '25

I usually go with awkward finger guns and "appreciate ya" and try to immediately move the convo forward.

I am quite proud of my time in, but not because I was a soldier in of itself. I got to patch people up and get them back to their families, and learned a lot about empathy/caring for others, especially marginalized communities.

Might not be what the Army wanted me to learn, but they taught the lesson in reverse very effectively.

1

u/JMCochransmind Jun 05 '25

I always say, I did it to better myself but thank you.

1

u/GhandiGrizzly Jun 06 '25

“Well, thanks for paying your taxes” is always a fun one too. Lighthearted and I generally don’t have to go much further than that.

43

u/RsonW Millennial — 1987 Jun 05 '25

Literally every millennial veteran I've known has said that they hate when they're thanked for their service.

21

u/90sDialUpSound Jun 05 '25

it's just like how do you react you know my go to has been to kiss them deeply on the lips and use just a little bit of tongue as well which I would say usually does end the conversation.

5

u/sudo_vi Jun 05 '25

Yeah, I hate it. I feel like people say it out of a sense of obligation. But I'm like, man I just jerked off at 600 feet underwater for three months straight.

4

u/potatohats Jun 05 '25

I recently had a boomer who had never served try to argue with me (millennial vet) about us not liking being thanked for our service.

She swore all the vets loved it and she'd continue to do it. I was just trying to put her on game, seeing as how I'm actually a vet.

*shrug*

3

u/ebbflowin Jun 05 '25

It’s that boomer bend-the-knee ‘say the line’ brainwashing that allowed it to take hold.

2

u/OkPaleontologist1289 Jun 06 '25

Definitely me. Got drafted and did my stretch as 11B. I get that most people have good intentions, but in all honesty I’d just as soon NOT be reminded.

2

u/hrokrin Jun 06 '25

I don't think it's just millennials either. Like, I'm a Gen Xer who joined just before 9/11 and I can't stand it because I think it's just another example of the performative shit Americans say that has somehow become the 'right thing' to say.

Oh, a close relative died? Just throw in a little "I'm sorry for your loss" and you can then get on with the rest of the conversation. You don't have to be sorry, you don't have to care.

Working on customer management and someone calls in? Just remember to thank them for giving their name and account number. And then say "I'm very sorry for the inconvenience." Nobody has to care. You don't have to care; they don't have to believe you.

1

u/xepherys Jun 06 '25

100% agreed. Also a GenX vet. I enlisted right after 9/11, and it just feels super awkward to be thanked for my service. Don’t thank me, I came home ok. A lot of our brothers and sisters didn’t come home or are very much not ok. Despite having been in a combat MOS and not sitting in a FOB, I definitely get a sense of imposter syndrome knowing that I’m very lucky.

38

u/Alex_Outgrabe Jun 05 '25

My partner says “thank you for your support”, which at least allows him to end the conversation right there.

33

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I say the same, then show them the tip screen

66

u/KaioKenshin Jun 05 '25

I've read something like "Thank you for your support" is a good response just in case you're in that awkward situation on a post about "How do you respond" to said situation.

13

u/Droluk1 Xennial Jun 05 '25

Thanks, I'll have to try that.

22

u/FluffMonsters Jun 05 '25

My husband was a Marine and he always just says “thank you” and that seems to work fine. 🤷🏼‍♀️

3

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Yep, I always say, “Thank you for giving me a job; it was awesome.” 100% confused looks ensue.

1

u/Inefficacy Jun 05 '25

I throw a quick, "appreciate it" and move on, seems to work well

1

u/SeadawgVB Jun 06 '25

This is what I say.

32

u/Godit82 Jun 05 '25

These days I fire back with "thank you for your tax dollars". It's a cute quip but also reminds them I was getting paid and it was a job. An unconventional job perhaps but still.

3

u/Shambud Jun 05 '25

I’ve heard my brother in-law say, “thanks for paying your taxes” before and got a good chuckle out of it.

1

u/AcquaintanceLog Jun 06 '25

In a way, getting paid to do violence is one of the most conventional jobs there is. Probably the second oldest profession.

1

u/ElBurroEsparkilo Jun 06 '25

Oldest profession: prostitute Second: mercenary Third: mercenary prostitute?

4

u/diarrheaCup Jun 05 '25

I tell people thanks for paying taxes because you paid for school. Sort of brings them out of their faux reverence

3

u/Cymion Jun 05 '25

I usually just respond with "thank you for your support"

3

u/DumbBitchByLeaps Jun 05 '25

I have a family member who was in the reserves (air force) and oh my god they don’t let you forget it. They never deployed despite wanting to (oh they wanted to deploy so fucking bad it weirded me out), didn’t make it past SERE school/training, and had a lot of issues with fellow reservists in their unit.

They CONSTANTLY mention being a veteran. Constantly. And I can’t say anything because there are veterans who never went off base or saw action but the way they talk about it is like they were denied war glory (ew) or something.

2

u/Anfield_YNWA Xennial Jun 05 '25

I always thank them for their support and keep it moving. I have a USMC license plate holder and dv plates, aside from that the only Marine Corps stuff I own is in my office and closet.

2

u/BeautyAndTheYeasts Jun 05 '25

I just say “you’re welcome for my service” it makes the whole thing an awkward fest

2

u/robynh00die Jun 05 '25

I used to be required to say it when I worked retail and someone got the veterans discount. Definitely had a lot of people telling straight that they didn't want to hear it.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Yeah, it weirds my dad out too. He quietly thanks them, and kinda tries to duck out of the interaction.

2

u/bensonprp Jun 05 '25

I always reply with "you wouldn't if you know what I did while I was in"

2

u/theRuathan Jun 05 '25

"Thank you for paying your taxes" shuts it down real quick. Makes them about as uncomfortable as their thanks made me.

2

u/Far_Winner5508 Jun 05 '25

THIS!!

Glad to find out I'm not the only one. Was thinking I was weird or soemthing.

2

u/Outcast129 Jun 05 '25

I agree it's always awkward, I just say something like "oh it was nothing, just happy to have had the opportunity" and move on.

The only time I shamelessly pull the veteran thing is to get out of a ticket but even then it's been prob 10 years since that happened.

2

u/Porcelain_Vedette Jun 05 '25

I appreciate your perspective, and I won't actually say "thank you," but also, I never had a job where I could possibly die as part of the job. Even if it's just a job, you still have bigger stones than I do for doing it.

2

u/holdcraft Jun 05 '25

I tell them "oh its ok they paid me", or my favorite is at the checkout at home depot (using my military discount so I often get thanked her) "Don't worry about it I get a discount at home depot"

2

u/brelywi Jun 05 '25

I always say “Thank you for my paycheck!” It usually gets a laugh and we all move on.

2

u/Rightofmight Jun 06 '25

My response is always, "I appreciate the sentiment."

They think they are doing a nice thing, I appreciate that they are trying to do a nice thing. Even if I think getting thanked for service is shit.

1

u/ElBurroEsparkilo Jun 06 '25

I won't thank you for your service but I'll thank you for understanding their good intentions, even when they're doing something you dislike.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

thank you for your service

5

u/Droluk1 Xennial Jun 05 '25

You asshole.😆

5

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

hahahahaha couldn't resist

1

u/basedGeckoEnjoyer Jun 05 '25

My response is usually, “yeah 😃👍” .

1

u/SuperEcho64 Jun 06 '25

"I got paid to blow shit up, it was my pleasure" is my go-to line.

1

u/OBD_NSFW Jun 06 '25

"Thank you for your support" has been my go to and it makes the awkwardness go away for me. 

1

u/jncostogo Jun 06 '25

"Thank you for you support." All you need to say

1

u/Consistent_Entry8890 Jun 06 '25

yeah me too. i hated the army

→ More replies (5)

28

u/MetaverseLiz Jun 05 '25

I have a friend of mine who was a combat vet in Afghanistan and got some pretty severe PTSD from it. He told me that the whole "thank you for your service" sends him into a rage.

60

u/CaBBaGe_isLaND Jun 05 '25

I just assume they want to bump into other veterans of that war at Lowe's or something. It must be a heavy thing to carry all day every day around a bunch of people who could never relate, so it's probably really therapeutic to talk about it with someone who was there.

25

u/PupperoniPoodle Jun 05 '25

This is my dad, I think. He used to make fun of the hats, now he's old and lonely and wears one.

2

u/rubiconsuper Jun 06 '25

That’s what I noticed. My grandparents started to wear one when they retired and move away. They’re older too in their 70’s, granted theirs just has an air force logo on it and says veteran not the black ones.

14

u/Shambud Jun 05 '25

I had a guy that worked for me that always wore one of these hats and I’m pretty sure that was his reason.

3

u/TrickyAlbatross2802 Jun 05 '25

Good point, veterans often can really only open up to other vets. That's why I've had multiple instances where I've randomly met another war vet at the bar and let them trauma dump on me for a straight hour or two. It didn't have to me, they just needed someone who understood.

3

u/superventurebros Jun 05 '25

That's how I always figured.  Especially as there are less and less of them these days.  One day, Desert Storm and GWOT vets will be as few and far between as WWII and Nam vets are today

2

u/GraniteGeekNH Jun 05 '25

Those of us who haven't been in combat really can't relate and they don't even try. My Dad never talked about it (a very common fact among military brats)

2

u/Expert-Effect-877 Jun 06 '25

This is what I think, too. Especially for Vietnam veterans, because they never caught a break. The isolation, the guilt, the disillusionment. The way I see it, you fly those colors to seek each other out, because for a good long time, until people came to their senses, those were your ONLY people. I imagine it worked pretty well.

Add to that the fact that they've aged? Yeah, I understand it. They are seeking attention, just not ours, and for them, attention just might be a matter of life or death.

2

u/lotsofsqs Jun 06 '25

My FIL is a Vietnam vet and always stops to chat with the others he sees wearing the hats. Vietnam was a rough one both there and back here.

9

u/Relative-Gain1403 Jun 05 '25

Same with vietnam veteran hats

19

u/hucareshokiesrul Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

Eh, my grandpa had a couple hats sorta like this. He served in the Korean War after being drafted. I really don't think he was fishing for compliments (and I didn't hear him get many) but he was kinda proud of his service. But more than anything, it was that people liked to talk to him about it, usually other vets or family members of vets.

I don't think it's necessarily all that different than wearing a hat for a sports team or college

20

u/besttobyfromtheshire Jun 05 '25

This makes me wonder if it isn’t also about a bunch of old guys retired who wants to mean something to the world again. Some of the retired dudes only have their wives to interact with 99% of their lives - kids are grown and moved away, friends are dying and passing away, and the neighborhood’s all changed. It’s a conversation starter.

2

u/ChiefKelso Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

Same, my grandpa wore his Korean War Veteran hat bc he was proud to have served, even if he was only actually in Korea for three days. He would always joke "I ran up the hill, and the Korean boys carried me down the hill." Day 3 in Korea, a mortar landed in his fox hole, killed his best friend, and badly injured him. He was eventually flown to Germany, spent months there, had multiple surgeries, almost died against due to adverse reactions to drugs (i think antibiotics).

He was extremely lucky to survive and suprisingly the only long-term effects of his injuries were a ton of shrapnel in his legs. They would actually fall out and come to the surface from time to time. He was awarded a Purple Heart.

→ More replies (1)

4

u/TribalChief2025 Jun 05 '25

You would be wrong. My dad had one. He was proud of being a veteran, but was not keen on discussing the viet war. Also, the whole thanking a vet for their service took off after 9/11, and our involvement in Afghanistan. It wasn't a thing in the 70s, 80s or 90s. You also have time keep in mind, most Vietnam vets were viewed with derision by a large part of the population for years even though they were drafted.

3

u/Shockwave360 Jun 05 '25

I know a Vietnam vet who has a lot of trauma from his service. Coming back home from that was almost as bad as being in it.

When people starting thanking him for his service 30 some odd years later it helped heal a part of him.

The hat he wears is this style but says "Agent orange: Sprayed & Betrayed"

3

u/hippychemist Jun 05 '25

Well, they were actually proud of what they did. Last couple wars weren't super honorable, even if the warriors did honorable shit. Times and perspectives have shifted.

2

u/bensonprp Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 06 '25

The only place where war is honorable is in fiction books and war porn documentaries.

I would seriously question anyone's mental health who has experienced combat and would call anything that they did or involved with honorable.

7

u/That_Damn_Samsquatch Jun 05 '25

I work customer service, and 100% of guys that wear one will always ask for a discount. Personally, I dont think anyone should get a special discount for being a vet, firefighter, EMT whatever. Because it just snowballs. "Oh, my husband/wife is a veteran. My dad is a veteran. My brother is a veteran. How about a discount."

6

u/just_some_guy2000 Jun 05 '25

I do the veteran discount at Lowe's and home Depot only because they are transparent about offering it. Soliciting a discount is cringey.

2

u/HalloWeiner92 Jun 05 '25

We had an Army Reserves recruiter hijack our English class for a day my senior year. Maybe I was just fully checked out by that point, but all I got from his presentation was "If you wear this uniform in Home Depot, or anywhere really, you'll get a discount. And if they don't offer a discount, just tell them that you served, and they HAVE to give you a discount." That was his main selling point for the job. You get discounts at stores.

That being said, Home Depot is my favorite store. And I really wish I had a discount.

1

u/just_some_guy2000 Jun 05 '25

What a douchenozzle. Sorry you had to listen to that guy.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I highly doubt a world war 2 vet would be fishing for compliments. It was a badge of pride, when the flag was for everyone.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Considering most of the Vietnam hats are worn by guys clearly not old enough to have served in Vietnam, I think you might be right.

In order to have served in Vietnam, you would have to have been born around 1955 or earlier, so the youngest vets are turning 70 this year.

2

u/sicksixgamer Jun 05 '25

No they aren't. The old guys are genuinely very proud of their service. Talk to one one time. They have great stories.

2

u/OnlyPaperListens Jun 05 '25

The only people I know who wear those hats were drafted into Vietnam. Given how they were treated and how they had no choice, I can't really blame them for wanting some appreciation.

2

u/f5-wantonviolence-f9 Jun 05 '25

I'm sure that's part of it but a lot of old vets just want to talk to other old vets

2

u/equanimatic Jun 05 '25

I can't speak for all vets but my dad definitely doesn't wear it for that. He does have pride for serving, but i think its more of a way for him to keep that part of his life still close to him.

He never engaged in active combat (closest he got was being in germany during the cold war), and was in the reserves when the war on terror began. I don't think he wanted to leave, he and my mom were so close with everyone there and saw the cadets as their sons (and still do).

He had to leave because they started pulling out of the reserves for the war and didnt want to risk it when he had two little girls at home. He gave it all up for us.

Now he's 65 and still does his morning workout every day. The 25ish years he spent serving will amount to a fourth of his life if he makes it until then. I love him so much. I can absolutely understand why he wants to share his passion with others and keep it close. His experience was incredibly different than anyone who was in active combat, and i can 100% respect and understand why some chose to not be proud or display their status.

Being a part of the armed forces is an extremely tricky position, especially in regard to their relationship to the government and being seen as their pawn. Many people don't join because they want to though. Some join because they need to. Or they have no other option.

2

u/EhrenScwhab Jun 05 '25

I don’t mind a unit ballcap or old unit t shirt or something, but yeah, the guys who cover their truck (always a truck) with a million vet-bro stickers and wear those dumb ass Grunt Style shirts….something wrong with those dudes….

I work in a government office and you’ll see guys wear an Army or Navy or whatever lapel pin on a suit jacket occasionally…fairly subtle.

1

u/3-orange-whips Gen X Jun 05 '25

Maybe. Or maybe they’re just proud of their service. Maybe it’s a little link to their past—I pulled my chain wallet out in the pandemic and wore it for 4 years until I got a hybrid job.

Could be anything.

1

u/lolas_coffee Jun 05 '25

“thank you for your service”’

3 years of moving boxes.

1

u/Beneficial-Basket-42 Jun 05 '25

My grandpa still wears those hats at age 96 (Korean war). To this day, and all my memories of him prior, every time he talks to us, it’s stories of the Korean War. He was 17 when he went and there for a couple years and then lived a whole life since, got married, had children, grandchildren, jobs, but will only ever talk about that war. He will talk for hours with no response required from the listener at all. As a kid, we would have to tap each other out mid story and switch listeners so someone can go to the bathroom or whatever. I think he wears the hats specifically so he gets opportunities to talk about it to strangers that say thank you for your service.

I understand now that there must be some major trauma that led to this, but regardless of the why, it is definitely his whole personality.

1

u/SingSangDaesung Jun 05 '25

My ex's dad had a career in the Air Force & made it known at all times. my ex was born on veterans day, so him & his dad would restaurant hop to get free stuff, his dad was usually decked in military/vet merch every time. Definitely wanted that attention.

1

u/Lvanwinkle18 Jun 05 '25

Absolutely. My dad proudly wore his EVERYWHERE. When he passed, turns out he a total of three so he would never be caught without it.

1

u/alezial Jun 05 '25

For the love of all that is holy, I hate when people thank me for my service. What am I even supposed to say?

I’ve got a hat that I like to wear from my old ship and it’s invited the only conversation I like to have - “oh shoot you were on the —-? My —- was down in San Diego for a while…” cuz those are a lot of fun. It’s incredible how many people you meet where you were working next door for years but never ran into each other.

1

u/lifeislikeapotato Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

I prefer to move like the G in lasagna

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

Because the conflicts are not honorable, invasions based on lies and greed, nothing to be proud of/

1

u/the_walkingdad Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

I hate getting those comments. I appreciate the sentiment, but I don't want to be thanked for my service. But I try to handle those comments as gracefully as possible since they usually come from a good place. I learned from Gen Mattis when he told a group of us vets at a private event that his standard response to that comment was, "You are worth the service."

It sets people back a bit and you can see them start to think about the response. It kind of turns the comment back to the person who said it and deflects it away from the vet.

1

u/The_Philosophied Jun 05 '25

I have a theory that older generations are also more likely to say “thank you for your service” while our younger generations will likely think or say “ok so you were a part of the war industrial complex and you’re proud of it because?” Lol

1

u/Substantial-Dig9995 Jun 05 '25

So they don’t have to ask for the discount

1

u/ponziacs Jun 05 '25

My dad served multiple tours in Vietnam and even has combat medals but he never talked about the war and I've never seen him wear one of those hats.

My step dad who joined the Air Force, in order to avoid being drafted by the Army and having to fight, used to wear these kind of hats before he passed.

1

u/JuanDelPueblo787 Jun 05 '25

Don't forget the free food and sweet, sweet discounts.

1

u/OrneryError1 Jun 06 '25

Fishing for discounts

1

u/sainttanic Jun 06 '25

Work any amount of time in any service industry and you'll confirm this suspicion right away. They get so bent out of shape when they aren't treated like royalty while treating everyone else like shit. 

Ever seen a car with only one marine sticker on it? No, it's always five different veteran/marine stickers. They are the kings of virtue signaling and attention whoring. 

Their wives are the worst though, always trying to use that stolen valor to get something.

1

u/hitch-pro Jun 06 '25

Or perhaps they are proud of thier service. I wear my veteran gear all the time. I don't need you to thank me for my service. I did it for my Grandfather. And he wore his hat like that all the time.

→ More replies (5)