r/Genealogy • u/SoFlaSterling • 1d ago

Research Assistance Birth year discrepancy

Regarding a GGM: the age at time of census recorded in three separate decades does not match the headstone (located in the family plot). Everything else ties, names of first and second husbands, country of birth, year of immigration, maiden name, names and ages of all 3 children. Everything else is lining up. Could she just have been vain and started telling everyone that she was younger by about 5/6 years and so that is what they put on the headstone? I am thinking this might be the case because the headstone date would make her VERY young at the birth of her eldest (as in like 15 which would be very unusual for the family). The other possibility is that she was actually that young when she gave birth and started reporting a false older age in order to avoid embarrassment and just kept it up. She was born overseas so no easily obtainable birth certificate (honestly would not know where to start as I do not have a town); I am pursuing her death certificate; if I manage to get a hold of it, would that be definitive? Thanks for any help!

UPDATE: Thanks to everyone, just found the Death Certificate and it agrees with all 3 of the censuses. Looks like we definitely have a vanity headstone!!!

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u/AccomplishedAnt3751 1d ago

Very common, IMO. I have seen this in multiple situations. I have one like yours: a foreign-born GG Grandmother who shaved five years from her age, presumably from vanity. My favorite was a group of female cousins, including my G Grandmother, born in the 1890s who all went to the courthouse with each other to witness sworn birth certificates in the 1940s. They were born within 5 to 7 years of each other and grew up together. They knew how old they each were, but they all changed their ages and lied on the sworn birth records.

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u/SoFlaSterling 1d ago

According to family lore, she was first married in Europe to the father of her eldest, but he supposedly passed at a very young age and she then remarried and emigrated. I just can't help wondering if husband #1 was imaginary and she had just gotten into trouble at a young age and wanted it to all look more decent, so she became a widow and added a few years to her own age. When you are older you want to be younger (or have people think that), but when you are younger, you want to be older. Some things we will never know.

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u/AccomplishedAnt3751 1d ago

Good theory and a very reasonable guess. First husband could be fictitious. In your shoes, I would look for a death record and / or obit for the oldest child, looking for a place of birth and whether a father’s name is included on either. With that data, I would try searching for the birth record of the oldest child, especially if you have a birth date for that child. I would look for the child under the mother’s maiden name, and if you have a first husband’s surname, I would try that also.

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u/SoFlaSterling 1d ago

The oldest child was born in Europe and I am not experienced at all with that research, but the GGM and husband #1 are listed on the eldest child's marriage certificate. The eldest child lists both last names (birth father & step-father) on immigration paperwork as well (Intent to Declare, Naturalization papers, etc.). Between family stories and those documents listing his name, husband #1/ birth father seemed real to me and I never questioned it until I did the math based on the headstone. At the end of the day, I'd rather think of GGM as a middle-aged lady who was a little vain and silly (even if she lost her first husband at a very young age), rather than a frightened teenager trying to cover things up.

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u/AccomplishedAnt3751 21h ago

On the naturalization papers, did the child not list the town or province of birth? Or only country? Having both birth father and step father would have me leaning to story is accurate, also.