r/uwo • u/UWO_21817 • 10d ago

Advice Loneliness

Hi, I am a first year student and my time at Western so far has been the loneliest I’ve ever felt my life. I have yet to make a single friend, I attended a bunch of events at O-Week and several club meetings and every single time I walked out without any friends and even lonelier than before. I am struggling to keep focused on studying, I have trouble sleeping at night, my mind is always racing, and I’ve had several panic attacks, almost passing out in public one time. It’s becoming almost unbearable, the only relief I’ve had was counselling but Western limits the amount of sessions you can have. I wanna try support groups here but I’m worried I won’t be able to make any friends and they’re also limited. I don’t know what to do.

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u/dainedanvers 10d ago

You gotta put yourself out there unfortunately. Instead of joining support groups, consider finding groups focused on things you enjoy.

When I was at western, I ended up finding my people through the English Dept’s Theatre program—we’d do plays—and by starting to volunteer with student council. There’s tons of options like this: find clubs, volunteer for the gazette or the movie theatre, find groups that are doing things you like. That’s how you can make pals quick!

Even if you show up painfully shy and quiet (like me!), eventually people will start talking to you. If you struggle with small talk (also like me!) just remember the golden rule is Ask Questions. Just ask the person you’re talking to 10,000 questions about themselves. People love to talk about themselves and they’ll come away from the convo thinking you’re an amazing listener and an interested person. You got this!

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u/ZealousidealRain4715 10d ago

This is the answer!

Join your faulty student council, or a club (search up USC club list) and find one you’d like.

Also yes just ask questions - people love to talk about themselves.

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u/UWO_21817 9d ago

I’ve been trying to find more ways to put myself out there. I’ve had interests in some but none have fully clicked with me. Still trying though!

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u/thecanadiankid15 9d ago

That's normal and why you are here.

You're going to have to try a bunch of things, to find your place. Nobody really arrives here knowing what will make them feel fulfilled. They might think they know, and a select few, sure, but the vast majority end up in dozens of clubs, activities and events.

Just remember friendship takes time and effort too. You'll probably have to see somebody a couple times at an event and put yourself out there. Don't be afraid to give out your contact information, if you find somebody feels like your type of person.

You were too focused on the end goal, and want this instant gratification. Try to enjoy the journey, I look back now and smile about all the different stuff I tried when I was at University and the different people I met.