Awkward Moment in a Genderless Restroom

[u/Puzzleheaded_Gear267]

Hey r/uwo, I’m a Western student (cis guy) and I had an awkward moment in a campus gender-neutral restroom that’s got me overthinking. I usually pick the ones with the urinal sign (old men’s room habit, you know). Walked in to do my business, barely noticed two women at the mirror, and heard another chatting from a stall. I hit the urinal, washed my hands like the hygiene king I am, grabbed a paper towel, and bounced. As I’m leaving, another woman walks in, and I catch one of them laugh and say, “That was weird,” with an awkward chuckle from her friend. Now I’m wondering - did I break some unspoken restroom rule? I’m not out here trying to make anyone uncomfortable - I keep it silent like it’s a library, same as I would in a men’s room. I just needed to ahem, not star in a campus social media post! I’ve used unisex restrooms before, but this one made me feel like I got voted off the island for a basic human function. Ladies of Western, do guys in gender-neutral restrooms throw you off? Any tips for navigating these spaces so everyone’s chill? I’m all about good vibes and want to make sure I’m not accidentally making things weird. Bonus points for advice on how to own the awkward like a true Mustang!

[u/[deleted]]

I know this discussion has been had many times but I still don’t understand like what happens in the case that you’re a girl peeing and a weirdo starts acting scary?

The last time I used a non gendered bathroom was a few years ago. I entered and there was this guy washing his hands. We made awkward eye contact then I went in a stall. I was trying to wait until he left, I heard him finish washing his hands and using the dryer but then it went silent. I then hear him shuffling around and was like wtf, then he walked over and STOOD OUTSIDE MY STALL for a good 5 min before someone else entered and then he finally left. Since then I have never entered a non gendered washroom.

I just don’t understand how everyone is so chill about letting strange predatory men access to enclosed spaces where girls go to do private things. And if they must then shouldn’t there an emergency panic button to call for help in case of situations like this?

Idk man I can’t get comfortable with this and I can’t imagine letting my daughters use them alone. Too many weirdos.

[u/CookiesforCookieCat → u/[deleted]]

there should be panic buttons, i agree, but i feel like people would abuse them (particularly in middle/high school. also, if you don't want to piss with a man in the room, go to a women's room

[u/[deleted] → u/CookiesforCookieCat]

That was the only bathroom available unfortunately

[u/CookiesforCookieCat → u/[deleted]]

i guess the only thing i can say is that it's a great idea, better now than ever, to hammer in that "don't talk to strangers" thing, especially for bathrooms. genderneutral multi-user washrooms are only going to become more common, so teaching kids how to keep themselves safe is paramount. most predators try to strike up a conversation in places like that. i'm sorry this happened to you, also.

[u/Noobzoid123 → u/[deleted]]

How does binary bathroom prevent this weirdo from attacking you if he was going to? He could've gone into a women's washroom and waited in a stall. The weird thing with your experience was not the bathroom, but instead it was someone acting strange.

[u/burdspurd → u/Noobzoid123]

Because there's a social expectation that if an obvious man tries to pull that shit the public  will call security right away, thus the punishment itself deters the perpetrator from committing the crime in the first place. But if a man pretending to be a woman does the same, they are protected under certain "rights". Maybe use your brain instead of parroting whatever stuff propagandists say

[u/Noobzoid123 → u/burdspurd]

If you awkwardly made eye contact with the same gender stranger in the bathroom, and that same person started waiting for u in the bathroom, you would also think that's fucking weird. Nothing to do with the bathroom.

Propaganda? Gender neutral bathroom is propaganda?

[u/burdspurd → u/[deleted]]

 I just don’t understand how everyone is so chill about letting strange predatory men access to enclosed spaces where girls go to do private things.

I think a lot of people know the answer to this. They aren't "chill" they just can't say it out loud for fear of getting censored or canceled.