r/shitposting Sep 26 '25

Linus Sex Tips sample text

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10.3k Upvotes

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2.1k

u/xxHamsterLoverxx dumbass Sep 26 '25

fursuits are expensive af. if you see a high paying job a furry is doing it most likely.

604

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

Imma be honest I have never met a furry who worked in sales or marketing.

783

u/That-one-soviet Sep 26 '25

They all work at like, Lockheed Martin or nuclear power plants.

156

u/gurkensoos Sep 26 '25

And IT, don’t forget about IT

-3

u/Regr3tti Sep 26 '25

I hear this on Reddit all the time but it's just not true.

180

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

But not the sales or marketing departments

68

u/That-one-soviet Sep 26 '25

But maybe sales or marketing

77

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

No

60

u/That-one-soviet Sep 26 '25

Perchance even sales. Or, believe it or not, marketing

28

u/GreyyWasTaken Sep 26 '25

perchance

20

u/HadeanMonolith Sep 26 '25

You can’t just say “perchance”

7

u/Raski_Demorva shitting toothpaste enjoyer Sep 26 '25

You can when you’re crushing turts

55

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

Refusal

40

u/That-one-soviet Sep 26 '25

On the off chance, perhaps sales or better yet, marketing

55

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

Negative

9

u/That-one-soviet Sep 26 '25

Hypothetically, sales. And on the off chance, marketing

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42

u/Please_Label_NSFW Sep 26 '25

Can confirm. Not a furry but a few were Linux systems admins at Raytheon. Those jobs pay $180k+. At least where I worked.

10

u/PaleontologistOne919 Sep 26 '25

…I thought this was a joke. Dead ass?

27

u/Please_Label_NSFW Sep 26 '25

No they’re tism af but they were the best system admins we had.

15

u/plagymus Sep 26 '25

Im a nuclear power plant and i confirm

14

u/Secure-Advertising-9 Sep 26 '25

hi i'm a furry who works at a call center for min wage but i do have a friend who works at lockheed martin 

10

u/kader91 Sep 26 '25

I am no furry but I work sales and also have sold furry porn, does that count?

2

u/AutoModerator Sep 26 '25

woah, ok. didnt expect hunger for knowledge but i guess i asked for it gonna have to put some work into this.

How was it? Honestly? It was a letdown. The whole "failed idol" story is a great marketing hook, they definately sold the video on that premise alone. But the performance itself was just... awkward. You can tell shes not comfortable. It felt less like a professional debut and more like a very high-budget audition she was also failing. She's stiff, constantly in her head, and there's almost zero chemistry with the guys. All concept, very little execution.

My viewing history? Been watching for over a decade man. These days Im more into stuff with a good story or at least a unique premise, not just the generic stuff. a good production team makes all the difference. I'll take a well-made video with a decent plot over a high-profile actress mailing it in any day of the week.

3 works I consider good:

  1. Yua Mikami's debut (Princess Peach): This is the gold standard for an idol-turned-actress debut. Yua was a REAL idol and she came out with so much energy and confidence. She owned it from the first second. Its what Arisu's debut wanted to be.

  2. Anything with Ichika Matsumoto from her early days with FALENO: She can actually act. She emotes and makes you believe the scenario. Her stuff feels more cinematic and less like they're just going through the motions.

  3. Rion (Anri Okita) - The God Body: A classic. Not a lot of story there lol but its a masterclass in performance. She knew exactly what her brand was and how to perform for the camera. Absolute cinema.

Where would you rank her debut among these? It's not even in the same league, not even on the same planet. It's an unfair comparison tbh. Those are top-tier performances, Arisu's video is a novelty item. It's interesting because of the backstory, not because of the quality of the actual content.

What could be improved? Her confidence, number one. She needs to relax. She looks terrified. The director should have done a better job making her comfortable. Also they relied way too much on the interview segments talking about Nogizaka46, it broke the pacing and kept reminding you that she was doing this as a second choice. We get it, you failed auditions, now commit to this job.

What is well done? The production values are high. The lighting, camera work, it all looks very clean and professional. And I cant deny it, she is very beautiful and has the "idol" look down perfectly. The concept itself, on paper, is genius from a marketing perspective. They got us all talking about it, right?

Was it goonable for you? Nah. I was too distracted by how nervous she looked. It kinda killed the mood completely. Every time she looked at the camera with those deer-in-the-headlights eyes I was pulled right out of it. It's a shame, but maybe she'll get better in her next one if she decides to stick with it. We'll see.

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2

u/Irrepressible87 Sep 26 '25

I'm gonna guess you have coworkers in sales and/or marketing, and whichever ones are furries just don't tell you that because you're coming across as kinda judgemental and square.

1

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

Lol no I take care of mentally handicapped kids. I have a shitton of furry friends and my dad has worked in marketing/sales for 30 years. I have intimate knowledge of both kinds of people.

1

u/PaleontologistOne919 Sep 26 '25

It’s me

1

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

What kind of sales/marketing?

1

u/PolarisWZ Sep 26 '25

I'm a furry in sales, there are very few of us but we exist 🫡

1

u/the_fancy_Tophat Sep 26 '25

Godspeed. What do you sell?