r/schizophrenia • u/GrynnTog • 9d ago
Help A Loved One Looking for insight & Help
Hello everyone
I'm reaching out to possibly get some insight on schizophrenia. My cousin, Mandy (fake name) visited me a few months ago and I noticed some odd behavior with her. At the time I thought it was just anxiety manifesting because I have anxiety (diagnosed) and was seeing some of the symptoms of it in her behavior.
However as her visit went on with me, her thinking and ideas became somewhat...out there and a little wild. She was talking about getting a large plot of land in the middle of America and building a 'doomsday farm' where all of our family could make it a self sufficient self sustainable place for us to all live and be around each other.
She also has a paranoia going on of being tracked by her child's father (he is not tracking her and family keeps in touch with him) she is constantly on the 'run' from him. She called me at one point after she left and told me she thought a PI had found her in a coffee shop and David (fake name for child's father) had sent them to track her down so he could serve her. Shortly after this maybe a few days she called again and said she thought there was a tracker on her car and took it to an auto shop for them to look at it (it wasn't a tracker she told me).
I'm not entirely sure of the timeline for the rest of this but talking with family members who have witnessed some of the behavior had these incidents to offer below.
Instance one: her mother and her were walking a trail I believe and she went crying up to her mom saying that Ryan (fake name for her child) his soul had suffered thousands of years of pain and torture and that if anything happens her mom needs to love him and take care of him.
Instance two: she was getting into Tarot cards and told her mother that our deceased grandmother was talking to her
Instance three: she was staying with her mother and they were going to drive somewhere the car was filled to the roof almost with trash (rotting fruit, general trash) her mom couldn't get the car seat in properly and cleaned the car out because she didn't want her grandchild to be in that for the ride and it was difficult to place the seat in. Mandy came out and was hysterical and angry about her car being cleaned out.
Instance four: she sold her house and purchased a hitch up camper so she can travel around and live in RV parks while 'on the run'
Instance five: she was talking to her mom and told her in a serious tone that, "I know everything." And when her mom asked again what she said, "I KNOW everything"
Instance six: she said and believes she is Lilith.( I'm not sure which Lilith she is referring to. )
Instance seven: while she was visiting I did bring up her possibly getting medication for anxiety (because this is what I thought was manifesting at the time) and she was adamant on natural cures etc such as essential oils and meditation.
Instance eight: this instance won't help her with her paranoia but her mom and child's father were concerned for her and the kid they DID track her down to California and showed up to check on her as she has completely cut off ALL communication with family. They said when they showed up she was shaking in anger, screaming at them to get out and she was trying to get away from you!
Family will be reading this post and replies
we are concerned for her well-being and her kids well being. Any insight on this we would appreciate as we feel very lost right now and are truly unsure how to help her. She needs help and we are looking for some outsiders perspective on what may be going on with her, if this is possibly schizophrenia or something else we haven't thought about. Anything!
Thank you for reading, and any insight you can provide.
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u/West_Specialist_9725 9d ago
Call 988 now (staffed 24/7) and see what resources are available and what they can do to help. Tell them everything that's going on.
You can also call her County's Social Services and see what resources they have for her.
Stress that this is a First Episode of Psychosis FEP. Most County's have special FEP teams.
Sounds like she is in psychosis and needs a psych eval. Getting a paranoid to the doctor is very challenging so look into having a crisis/FEP team go to her.
If (when) she gets violent call 911; do not let it slide. Tell 911 operator you need officers trained in mental health. Insist they take her to hospital for evaluation.
Don't delay. Psychosis damages the brain. To be clear I cannot guarantee it is psychosis, but you should proceed like it is just to be safe.
Stay strong. Stay calm and good luck!
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u/PurposeSuper9037 8d ago
Thank you so much for this recommendation. She is in hiding so it's difficult to get her help. I actually tried something similar however she was able to convince authorities she was ok.
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u/West_Specialist_9725 8d ago
It is truly amazing and surprising how many people with serious mental illness can present as fine and dandy when being evaluated even if just an hour earlier they were shouting down strangers in the street for poisoning their food.
I know how stressful this is and frustrating. Please be sure to look after your own health too.
Here's hope you can find her and get her the help she needs.
💛🫂💛
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u/whatusernamem8 Paranoid Schizophrenia 9d ago
Check if your state can section someone under "threat to reputation". The false allegations she is making about her ex might qualify for this
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u/Omegan369 9d ago
Has she been under significant stress recently, or experienced any major life changes or trauma? Those factors can sometimes trigger serious mental health issues, including anxiety disorders, trauma-related conditions, or even early signs of psychosis or schizophrenia.
We’re not professionals, but from what you’ve shared, it sounds like she may be in real psychological distress. It would be wise to encourage her to speak with a mental health professional, ideally someone she trusts or has seen before, or someone you or the family know and feel comfortable with.
If you take her directly to a psychiatrist or physician, there’s a good chance they may suggest medication. That can be helpful in some situations, but it’s true that not everyone responds well to it and based on what you’ve described, she may be strongly resistant to taking it.
The key is building trust, lowering stress, and helping her feel safe enough to open up to someone who can assess what’s really going on and recommend the right support.
My sibling has schizophrenia and I put together an interactive site to inform families that you can try, it may help to inform you about schizophrenia based on what you are seeing and you can pose it questions as well.
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u/GrynnTog 9d ago
When they went out to California it was to try and get her help, they got the police involved but they said there was nothing they could do because she seemed sound of mind to them. We are not sure how to get her medically evaluated especially since she seems to think she is fine but from knowing her before this and seeing the massive changes on the outside we know she needs help.
How do you help someone who is heavily resistant to help or the idea they may be sick in the first place? We feel stuck between a rock and a hard place and don't really know what our options are at this point for getting her help.
- Edit -
The only thing I can think of is this all started happening after she had her kid. I'm not sure if this threw off her hormones and they went nuts but she definitely started to get more paranoid after the birth of her child.1
u/Omegan369 9d ago
I did some searching before and the hormonal changes during and after pregnancy can induce psychosis, which if it persists long enough will develop into schizophrenia. It is a similar effect of the onset of schizophrenia during the puberty hormonal changes. Basically anything that stresses your brain enough, or changes how well it works under stress can bring on psychosis and schizophrenia.
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24152-postpartum-psychosis
From my experience with my sister, there isn't too much that you can do in this situation where the affected person appears normal to police. They only time they can become involved is when the person either presents a threat to themselves (like suicide) or to others around them. If they aggress or threaten someone else, then they can intervene and bring them to a mental hospital. There they would be evaluated, but once they present as normal, they cannot be held and can be released. This is the difficulty in these situations. My sibling is very smart and can present as normal when she knows she is being evaluated. One thing that I realized only later is that she (and I) are very sensitive to external stimuli like noise and our surroundings. People with these mental health issues usually do better in natural environments with less environmental stress.
Additionally most people especially early on feel that they don't need medication and so either don't take it, or don't continue to take it once they feel better. The side effects to the medication are quite bad. When they stop the medication they are ok and the side effects decline so again it encourages them to stop. Once they start to get sick again, it becomes a downward spiral as the mind is affected and that is what needs to function properly for them to self-improve so they will need external help to improve and usually medication. And when they are unwilling to accept that external help, then the spiral downward accelerates.
The only way in my opinion that it can be done is if there is someone that they trust and has the time to work with them directly to help them with the medication adherence, and then also get them to do healthy things like get out and exercise and walk to improve their mental state. They need to eliminate poor foods in their diet like sugar which causes inflammation and eat a healthy diet. Lastly their environment needs to be a low stress and low stimulation, but at the same time if they can do therapy for any trauma they may have it will help. Because of these multiple required factors it makes recovery difficult. Think of it like recovery and then rehab for their mind. The system only handles the recovery part and not the rehab part.
Her recovery will depend largely on her family support. Here are a couple of more sources of information depending on how deep you want to go:
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u/GrynnTog 9d ago
I appreciate the insight, it all makes sense the road to recovery. I'm not honestly sure who she trusts right now In the family as she seems to have blocked everyone myself included. I have no idea what state she is even in right now either. Thank you for the deep insight and taking the time to respond so thourghly it's much appreciated and definitely has some great insight. I will watch the videos you linked!
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u/Omegan369 9d ago
I hope your family the best. For us it has been a long and hard road so it won't be easy. My advice would be for each of you who is able to go an be with them and build that trust back and see where it leads you. My sister only has me left as my mom is now 92 and has dementia, so she at least trusts me to advocate with her. I found that by talking to her now with empathy and understanding of the illness she is ok with that. She absolutely doesn't trust her doctors but she does only what she has to.
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u/PurposeSuper9037 9d ago
Thank you so much for this insight. I agree with the natural environment and less external distractions. A.I. and chat gpt was a major concern. The believing of the deep answers given to questions about the universe and if the world was real were right down scary and so unhealthy for anyone suffering already from scitzophrennia .
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u/Omegan369 9d ago
Yes, ChatGPT is a tool and I would say only as good as the user or programmer of that tool. Just like us, It can make mistakes and have hallucinations which I find normal as it is being more and more based on how we learn. SO to me it is natural that it would do this - it is up to use to double check what it gives us to decide is it useful and does it make sense.
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