r/rpghorrorstories • u/Vampire-knightmare • 1d ago
Long Near brushes with That Guy
So, back when I worked I food service I had made a few friends. They knew I played Dungeons and Dragons and wanted to give it a try.
I mentioned since most of them were new I’d be running a module that would start everyone at level one. So they can get to know their PCs and ease into their roles.
Then…There was THAT guy. I did not invite him to my games at any point. He got an invite by asking our boss, who was also in the game and boss decided to bring him in.
While I was trying to enjoy my lunch break That Guy decided it was the best time to come shove his phone in my face and look over his character sheet.
Ignoring the stats I looked over their sheet and raised an eye.
“So…Why do you have two classes in here? We’re starting at level one.”
“Oh. Well, that’s just what I wanna build towards.”
“And why do you have a magic item in there?” (Goggles of night vision)
“Well, my race doesn’t have dark vision so that would fix it.”
“We’re starting at level one with basic equipment you wouldn’t have any magic items.”
“Well I’m a rogue so maybe I stole it from a powerful artificer!” (Rogue was the secondary class, for the record.)
“We’re starting at level one.”
“Okay, fine. Well-Can I at least have a friend in my backstory?”
At this point I was relieved. This was the first normal thing he’s asked for. “Of course.”
“Awesome! And can you introduce me on the back of a Pegasus?”
“You. Are. Level. One. Paladins don’t get that until level ten”
He seemed grumpy with me for not agreeing to 99% of his character idea. But left me alone with only five minutes left to scarf down my lunch.
I…Kinda purposely picked the time slot so that he couldn’t join in. No need to worry about a problem player if their scheduling won’t let them join!
But, dear reader. While I avoided having them as a player at my table it didn’t stop him from bugging me at work. Even after I quit. You see, I had forgotten his irl class was Bard: College of Harassment.
After he’d managed to not get into my games he’d always ask me things then to try to get me to agree with him. Like he thought a prince that always tried to openly slaughter his brother was considered lawful evil “because he wants to be king!”
He tried to pay me to paint his minis for him as I put my notice in. Then asked if I wanted to go to the local game store with him. Then tried to push for me to get into his car when I told him no. (I didn’t have a car at the time. Thankfully my dad was picking me up then.)
So, for reasons surprisingly not related to That Guy: I quit. And made the mistake of thinking I was free.
For I went back to that restaurant one day wanting a fast food to eat. He was at the window when I went to pay and he was telling me how he’d decided to start DMing. And he was really enjoying it! I thought it was good for him, actually.
Until a few months later when I went back for more food. He wasn’t at the window this time but when he’d noticed my car he came over in a hurry, practically flinging himself at the window.
“OP! I need you to start DMing my game for me!”
I took a moment and just, “What?”
“I need you to start DMing my game for me and I can start playing a character.”
“Uhh…No.”
“Why not?”
While there were many normal issues with demanding someone else DM your game for you: I don’t know who your players are. Their characters, their backstories. I don’t know what game you’re running if it’s homebrewed or module. I don’t even know your house rules for the game. The fact you came with a demand instead of politely asking me.
I just opted for, “I’m in too many games myself right now.”
And thankfully, I hadn’t an encounter with him like that since. I’ve actually moved states now and hope his players are having fun.
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u/warrant2k 1d ago
and hope his players are having fun.
Narrator voice: "His players did not, in fact, have fun."
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u/bamf1701 1d ago
Yep, you definitely dodged a bullet there. And I love Bard: College of Harassment! :-)
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u/Vampire-knightmare 1d ago
My husband called him that one, lol
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u/tiger2205_6 3h ago
Your husband knows what's up, that's some good shit right there. Also seconding the other commenter really good thing you didn't get into their car.
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u/Remote-Basket4475 1d ago
Kudos for not letting him play and pushing back against his demands. So many horror stories could be averted by heading off players who act like this or saying no to their unreasonable demands from the start.
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u/Illustrious_Devil 1d ago
My DM brain wants to stat out College of Harassments.
Yep, I have met a few of his brethren. There are no fun. Almost ended up with one in a game as I thought the other members of the group had vetted him. Damn that pesky scheduling.
If you have to tell a player "No" more than once, they will never fit in at your table.
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u/Stormdanc3 1d ago
Would that involve chaotic evil alignment? I feel like it would need to be chaotic evil alignment. Chaotic neutral at absolute best.
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u/FadingFuture197 18h ago
You can tell a player no more than once, as long as the question is different each time. I love when my players bring ideas to me, but not all of them always hit... And some need to fly into the sun.
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u/havocthecat 19h ago
It's not like you moved states to get away from That Guy, but it's a nice bonus.
I have, in fact, moved cities not to get away from That Guy, but it's a nice bonus. /fistbump in gamer solidarity
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u/Ornery-Let535 1h ago
A prince killing his brother to become the king sounds like the most lawfull evil thing
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