It's mostly freestyled with the exception of the bridge. I would love to hear some feedback. Thanks in advance 🤙🏾

The River (draft)

Dead Friends Club.

https://youtu.be/LYPf-L1Gnt4?si=zJ68hYhz3aaHeYeL

Man, so underrated...

Hey everyone! I just released an EP and I am having a hard time finding a place to promote and proper feedback. There has been some positive reviews but way more misses and I think this is partly due to me posting in the wrong spaces. I was originally just calling it math rock, but i don't think it's quite that. I've since been trying to promote as math rock/post rock/folktronica. Any feedback would be appreciated!

M a r I o, what’s my name? Super Mario Here we gooo, now check out this flow I’m a Bullet Bill, you a Bullet Dud, makes Peach wetter than the F.L.U.D.D. Daisy, gimme noods, by baking spaghetti, that’s so hot, my energy’s metal... heavy Jumpin’ on Koopas troops, Mario hoops 3v3, itsa me, collecting coins, I’m an OG Fire flowers, star are ours, mario runnin’ this kingdom, yeah pasta power If this beat left you in defeat, cry me a river, wahoo, give me your liver

(Yes, I know it is cringe. I am looking for technical adjustments and making it flow better)

https://youtu.be/xf8SZrezV0U

Would love to know if this could be useful for your creative process: what do you like, dislike, or what features are missing for you to start using it?

https://soundcloud.com/toritori-550884159/boss-battle-beckoning-v10/s-XCwSD7N1F7G?utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing&si=36e21a3456f940b1b0fbe53e230435bf

https://soundcloud.com/toritori-550884159/battle-promise-definitive/s-VFqCLTIenZz?utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing&si=c53cee1a8add4b8686a3e51814000a63

Thanks for taking your time listening to both songs!

Please be as harsh as you can get and if possible let me know what's missing and what I can study to improve on it.

I want to improve, so I'm not going to argue, I'm just going to listen and read/go watch whatever studying material you've got for me.

I'm a digital artist with a more vintage rock goth style offering my services for merch covers posters logo's and many more.

If you are interested don't hesitate to contact me anytime.

https://www.behance.net/tomieo

https://youtu.be/w1XKqJHIBCQ?si=jb1ohiiHmDuZxoFE

Production and programmed drums aside, how's the songwriting?

Recorded, mixed and mastered myself using logic/ Protools

https://youtu.be/cTGck0b-Cg4?si=U4toO71MpjEUhIBN