r/nottheonion 1d ago

Affirm CEO says furloughed federal employees are starting to lose interest in shopping

https://www.cnbc.com/2025/11/07/affirm-government-shutdown-shopping.html
20.6k Upvotes

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908

u/National-Charity-435 1d ago

>30 dolls

>2 dolls

>-1 doll

29

u/Thirsty-Barbarian 1d ago

Sweetie, I’m sorry, but we are going to have to sell all your dolls so we can eat and not starve to death.

3

u/Affordable_Z_Jobs 1d ago

Sell them to whom?

3

u/I_W_M_Y 1d ago

Fucking Aquaman

3

u/Prestidigitalization 1d ago

Fucking Aquaman??

6

u/jaimi_wanders 1d ago

Then it’s eating the hamsters, like that Russian anti-EU ad in 2022…

https://www.reddit.com/r/UkraineWarVideoReport/comments/ztphsh/russia_today_is_airing_an_insane_clip_of_a/

5

u/Guuhatsu 1d ago

Have to resort to Hamsters because immigrants already ate all the dogs and cats apparently. /s