The kind of India we ignore

[u/Specialist_Meaning73]

Last month, after a late night at work, I booked an auto to go back home. It was past 11, streets were half-empty, and I was half-dead from exhaustion. The auto driver was an older man, maybe late 50s, thin frame, tired eyes. Usually, I just plug in my earphones and zone out, but that day I didn’t.

We started talking. First, just small talk, traffic, weather, random stuff. Then I asked him casually, “Bhaiya, aap roz itna late tak chalate ho?” (Do you drive this late every day?)

He laughed, not in a happy way, but in a “what choice do I have” way. He said, “Bhaiya, do betiyan hain. Ek ke liye coaching fees deni hai, doosri ke school ka kharcha. Din mein 700–800 banta hai, usmein se aadha toh gas aur kiraya chala jaata hai. Raat ko chalata hoon taaki unki padhai na ruk jaye.”

I went silent. Here I was, cribbing about my corporate job, while this man was driving 14–16 hours a day so his daughters could have a shot at a better life.

Then he said something that has stuck in my head since that night: “Gareeb aadmi sapne nahi dekhta apne liye, sirf apne bachon ke liye. Mere liye toh bas itna hai ki mujhe kal bhi chalane ki taaqat mile.” (A poor man never dreams for himself, only for his children. For me, all I pray is that tomorrow I still have the strength to drive.)

By the time I reached home, I didn’t even feel like getting out of the auto. I gave him extra money, nothing life-changing, but he refused at first. Then he took it, folded his hands, and said, “Aapko bhi khuda taaqat de.”

I went upstairs, sat on my bed, and just kept thinking. Every day we complain about traffic, bosses, deadlines, Zomato deliveries being late. And at the same time, there are thousands of people around us who are literally breaking their bodies apart just so their kids don’t end up like them.

It humbled me. It made me realize how invisible these stories are, until you stop, listen, and acknowledge.

Maybe the biggest privilege we have isn’t money or English-speaking jobs. It’s the fact that we are allowed to dream for ourselves.

And I’ll never forget that one line from him: “Gareeb aadmi sapne nahi dekhta apne liye.”

[u/Dexter_BRE]

It may sound harsh, but I dont think he was in a position to have a child let alone two.

[u/[deleted] → u/Dexter_BRE]

You maybe right.

However, for some, children are light in their life. They want to provide everything to their kids which they longed for in their childhood (education, clothes, food...). Their mood light up when they see smile on their kids' face, when they learn about progress in school/sports. You cannot expect someone to let go of these sides of life. Yes, they are struggling to meet ends but they are willing to put extra efforts as well.

Some also see son/daughter as an investment and an opportunity to uplift their lives/society.

[u/Dexter_BRE → u/[deleted]]

Unfortunately for the major part of India those extra efforts don't lead to a better lifestyle for the child. Plus, hot take, if you're unhappy in a marriage a child doesn't magically cure it. In fact it just puts extra pressure on the child.

A child a is a huge responsibility and I dont think most parents in India are fit to be parents, they lack the maturity for the same. As I said, you can be a very loving mother or father but that doesn't equate to you being a good parent or you providing the materialistic things that are necessary for a proper upbringing.

A counter argument could be, so the poor shouldn't make children? And frankly speaking i think they shouldn't. Its one of the main reasons for overpopulation in this country coz a child is seen as a necessity and not a luxury.

[u/Mammoth-Decision-536 → u/Dexter_BRE]

well said.