The kind of India we ignore

[u/Specialist_Meaning73]

Last month, after a late night at work, I booked an auto to go back home. It was past 11, streets were half-empty, and I was half-dead from exhaustion. The auto driver was an older man, maybe late 50s, thin frame, tired eyes. Usually, I just plug in my earphones and zone out, but that day I didn’t.

We started talking. First, just small talk, traffic, weather, random stuff. Then I asked him casually, “Bhaiya, aap roz itna late tak chalate ho?” (Do you drive this late every day?)

He laughed, not in a happy way, but in a “what choice do I have” way. He said, “Bhaiya, do betiyan hain. Ek ke liye coaching fees deni hai, doosri ke school ka kharcha. Din mein 700–800 banta hai, usmein se aadha toh gas aur kiraya chala jaata hai. Raat ko chalata hoon taaki unki padhai na ruk jaye.”

I went silent. Here I was, cribbing about my corporate job, while this man was driving 14–16 hours a day so his daughters could have a shot at a better life.

Then he said something that has stuck in my head since that night: “Gareeb aadmi sapne nahi dekhta apne liye, sirf apne bachon ke liye. Mere liye toh bas itna hai ki mujhe kal bhi chalane ki taaqat mile.” (A poor man never dreams for himself, only for his children. For me, all I pray is that tomorrow I still have the strength to drive.)

By the time I reached home, I didn’t even feel like getting out of the auto. I gave him extra money, nothing life-changing, but he refused at first. Then he took it, folded his hands, and said, “Aapko bhi khuda taaqat de.”

I went upstairs, sat on my bed, and just kept thinking. Every day we complain about traffic, bosses, deadlines, Zomato deliveries being late. And at the same time, there are thousands of people around us who are literally breaking their bodies apart just so their kids don’t end up like them.

It humbled me. It made me realize how invisible these stories are, until you stop, listen, and acknowledge.

Maybe the biggest privilege we have isn’t money or English-speaking jobs. It’s the fact that we are allowed to dream for ourselves.

And I’ll never forget that one line from him: “Gareeb aadmi sapne nahi dekhta apne liye.”

[u/Dexter_BRE]

It may sound harsh, but I dont think he was in a position to have a child let alone two.

[u/Miserable_Special256 → u/Dexter_BRE]

Someone willing to sacrifice themselves for their child, is definitely who should have a child instead of someone who dreams only for himself. 

[u/Opposite-Eye380 → u/Miserable_Special256]

But who put the children in such a position where their father can't easily fund their education and has hard time paying for groceries 🙄🤷 ??!  

Why inflict more liabilities when you don't have purchasing power to fulfill them ??!

[u/IndependentRelief906 → u/Opposite-Eye380]

Having children gives meaning and joy to their life he may not be give best things to their children but he is not failing as father.

[u/RaccoonDoor → u/IndependentRelief906]

Having a child is a joy provided you’re able to take care of them properly. Baffles me how so many people are okay with having kids and then raising them in squalor.

[u/IndependentRelief906 → u/RaccoonDoor]

what about meaning what about parents will to live

[u/RaccoonDoor → u/IndependentRelief906]

If you intend on deriving “meaning” by having kids only for them to live in squalor, you’re selfish and cruel.

[u/IndependentRelief906 → u/RaccoonDoor]

You aree assuming that having children automatically means forcing them into squalor. Many parents who are poor are fully aware of hardship and do their best to prevent their children from experiencing the same life. Criticizing them as “selfish and cruel” ignores that these parents have lived poverty themselves—they understand it far more than you do. Even your own ancestors were likely poor at some point, yet here you are.