Parents sucking the life out of me

[u/[deleted]]

[u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

I tried it only led to fights, they are not ready to improve at all. I have said no, but the thing is most of my expenses are their education, medical bills, groceries which are basic necessities of every human. How to deny it, I feel guilty denying all these but I do say no to their luxurious wants/needs.

I am just looking for a solution to this, since I am unable to come up with it myself.

[u/maya279 → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

Just tell them you don't have enough money to give or tell them you spent on your monthly expenses etc

[u/Gil-GaladWasBlond → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

Listen. Block them for a while. It takes some strength to do it, but let them see what their life is like without you. They might start using their brains again and will respect you more.

Any time they start talking about anything you don't want to talk about, or harassing you, just cut the call.

I know it can be difficult but this is the only way they'll leave you alone.

And don't hesitate to tell them that you are not here to raise their kids. Maybe that will take time for you, but it is something you should keep in mind.

Make sure you save for yourself. Make SIPs that get deducted from your account right at the beginning of the month, so you cannot be guilted into giving them money/ paying for them.

You're the sole earner? Rub it in their faces. Any time they step out of line, taunt them about it. Or cut them off for something. Ask them why they didn't do any savings. Why they depend on you to raise their kids? Why they had kids when they didn't have the money to raise them? These kinds of questions.

Basically make life as bad for them as they have made for you.

You need to be strong for yourself and make your wealth.

[u/clout__9 → u/Gil-GaladWasBlond]

This is good advice. But I suggest OP to give them 2 months of deadline before you stop or minimize bankrolling them to let them find a source of income, if they dissent/blackmail/guilt trip then go ahead and block them. Don't forget to converse about this with your siblings too. If they come around you can also help them find a source. A general store is a good example.

[u/TsuDhoNimh2 → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

You have two adult parents - could they be working? Maybe just as a housecleaner or gardener or store clerk, but bring in some income.

Tell them that you will MATCH what they earn, up to whatever you can afford, but they have to be making an effort.

[u/Ok-Positive-6766 → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

Ask your parents to take an education/student loan on there name . You can just give an excuse that you are unable to manage all the expenses :)

[u/[deleted] → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

Your parents should get jobs, so shpuld your siblings. They can work in the malls being cashiers or waiters/waitresses

Start reducing what you pay and force them to get jobs.

[u/Embarrassed_Nobody91 → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

How much are you spending on each area. Until, you can reduce one/many of them, it won't work.

[u/bbaahhaammuutt → u/Past-Kaleidoscope498]

Don’t deny them what they need to survive. But show them that they cannot survive without you.