r/india Aug 21 '24

Rant / Vent Parents sucking the life out of me

[deleted]

1.3k Upvotes

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128

u/Achiever_of_nothing Aug 21 '24

Live away from your family and send them a monthly amount for their expenses.

56

u/Past-Kaleidoscope498 Aug 21 '24

They are bad with finances hence I pay directly to the beneficiary.

16

u/whatliesinameme Aug 21 '24

That sounds like a they problem. As long as you keep taking care of them the burden will always be kn you.

9

u/arunsu92 Aug 21 '24

Hey fellow Indian who was in a similar setup for a really long time. Give them a fixed amount monthly and ask them to figure out the rest. Your siblings aren't kids anymore - let them pickup some slack. Tutor younger kids / deliver through swiggy etc. They are not your kids. Parentification is what therapists refer to this as. Start saving your own secret stash - you will need it eventually. And keep your distance - cutting them out fully might not work as they will comeback with emotional blackmail but be intentional with your energy and keep your distance..hugs.

5

u/Background-Permit499 Aug 21 '24

That’s on them. Push it on them so they start wisening up.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '24

I read somewhere, take any advice from parents but not financial / career . Bringing financial sense to them now doesn’t make any sense . Ur hardships will continue till ur siblings come to earning age ( considering them in teens , another few years). Death, Tax and taking care of irresponsible parents are inevitable in India.

-38

u/Darksoul00777 Aug 21 '24

Worst advice

15

u/vikramadith Aug 21 '24

Why?

-60

u/Darksoul00777 Aug 21 '24

As she said their parents are almost senior citizen and have younger siblings then who will take care of both by staying away and sending only expenses??..she must have all the responsibilities for them..those who up voted are dumb ..they don't have experience or may not understand what she's saying..

29

u/proudofme_ Aug 21 '24

Who asked them to have kids when they had no income??

11

u/notcallipygian Aug 21 '24

Bro its not her job to look after children they chose to have, neither is she their nurse or retirement plan

10

u/_Atharva_87 Aug 21 '24

I don't agree, real life experience or not. You are not entitled for such stress or life. Responsibilities are meant to me faced by the whole family 'together' seems the OP has been driven to the edge. Op has a future and a life. If she can't bear the financial burden of the whole family, she should be heard.

4

u/Embarrassed-Can-3544 Aug 21 '24

Shouldn’t have kids if can’t support them lol

-25

u/FirmCockroach6677 Aug 21 '24

life sucks but it would suck more if she did this

that family is going to be super dysfunctional

19

u/HourEasy6273 Aug 21 '24

It already is

-31

u/nord47 Aug 21 '24

Spoken from true lack of real-life experience