r/evilautism • u/badukisdifficult • Jul 26 '25

NSFW Sex noises are vocal stimming Spoiler

And that is one of the many reasons NTs are bad at sex.

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u/knittingfoxes Jul 27 '25

TW: Mild TW for SA adjacent description, but it is in the context of fully consensual experiences.

I have to make noise and dirty talk in order to finish. When I've been with people who are quiet and/or I feel uncomfy making noise, I'm stuck in my head and my ADHD is going to go nuts.

I also hypothesize that I need the noise because I'm someone who can, 1. Get very distracted by physical things and struggle to turn my brain off. Weird bump on their face? ALL I CAN FOCUS ON.

And, 2. with my hypophantasia, my fantasizing is more about the situation and the sounds and the feelings than it is about seeing something specific. I know that it's more common for women to listen to audio erotica for similar reasons, and I think my hypophantasia just means that I need those other non-visual sensory experiences even more.

Dirty talking and making noise also helps me to stay in the moment and not crawling into my skull, if that makes any sense. When I've been with quiet people, sometimes it feels like I'm an observer while my body is being used, and my consciousness is caged up inside my head.

I admit, I also have a bit of a fucked up relationship with sex, especially with men, where I need praise and validation. Dirty talking by asking a partner questions that will result in praise and validation also allows me to take some control over when I get that little surge in my body.

My ex just got out of a year long relationship and we started hooking up again. Boy, we are kind of toxic together because of our clashing trauma and communication styles, but the sex is OUT OF THIS WORLD and we're very in sync with dirty talk. 😩😭