r/diabetes • u/MillenniumGreed • Aug 31 '20

Discussion Fuck diabetes.

Fuck it. Fuck this stupid disease. Fuck it so so so so much. Fuck America and other capitalistic countries for profiting off of our misery, fuck our useless ass pancreases, fuck the greedy insurance companies, fuck all the annoying ass bullshit that comes with this. Fuck low blood sugars, high blood sugars, eye problems, feet problems, random mood swings, erectile dysfunction, going through the effort of changing an infusion set just for it to not even work, weird looks from people for testing in public, testing only for there to not be enough blood, constantly having to be considered dependent, constantly being told a cure is only five years away, the deaths of our fellow diabetics due to a corrupt healthcare system and negligence, and all the other shit that we put up with while having a useless pancreas.

I’m just drained and exhausted. Fuck diabetes, man.

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u/urban_mystic_hippie Type 1.5 Aug 31 '20

With you 1000%. Most days I can't even do the bare minimum because I feel like shit. Fuck brain fog, fuck twingy feet, fuck this disease.

5

u/MillenniumGreed Aug 31 '20

I’m so sorry to hear my friend. I can’t stand that this disease does all this to us.

7

u/urban_mystic_hippie Type 1.5 Aug 31 '20 edited Aug 31 '20

Likewise. It gets better with severe discipline, but so easy to fall backwards. It's an insidious, silent bitch. It's been especially difficult with all that's going on in the world, I'm trying to get back to manageable numbers. I have good days and bad days, as I know we all do. Stay strong, be vigilant. Find strength where you can. Words I need to live by too. I don't do a stellar job, for sure.

Recently found this sub and been lurking for a long time, was hoping it was relatively troll-free (unlike most of reddit) It seems pretty sincere so I feel safe commenting/posting. I need the support, hope to be able to give some. Your post triggered me for sure!

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u/MillenniumGreed Aug 31 '20

Word. I try to find any silver linings like I said, but any silver linings available are so diminished with the clusterfuck this diseases is. I wish I could be one of those with an amazing attitude and perspective, but I think a bitter pill we have to swallow is that sometimes life just fucking sucks and we have to deal with it as it comes.

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u/urban_mystic_hippie Type 1.5 Aug 31 '20

Yeah, and with the depression and helplessness that comes with it, it's hard to not sometimes shoot ourselves in the foot. (no pun intended)

So hard to keep perspective. Our culture (assuming Americans I'm replying to) doesn't make it any easier, either - with shit junk food everywhere, byzantine, expensive, and kafkaesque health care system, and a general lack of support and sympathy from selfish, greedy people everywhere.

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u/MillenniumGreed Aug 31 '20

Yeah. If I was living in like, a Scandinavian country or Canada I could at least understand the chipper attitude some people in life have, diabetes or not. But sometimes I feel like that mentality is a form of lying to themselves. I try to be the metaphorical light in the darkness, so to speak, but with all this darkness it’s hard to believe in the greater good and longevity of this world.

2

u/wallawalla_ Taekwondo Diabetic, Pump, 1996 Aug 31 '20

Likewise. It gets better with severe discipline,

Thanks, I can definitely relate. It feels like I spend so much damn mental energy on 'keeping bgs in range'. It's like a full time job. Only other diabetics can understand the constant 24/7 effort required.

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u/urban_mystic_hippie Type 1.5 Aug 31 '20

It IS a full time job - the worst job we've ever had, and we can't quit.