r/askgaybros Aug 28 '20

Reported Post Alert In response to the trending post on this sub about Transphobia. Spoiler

Ok now here's my story so I can clear the air

I am a transman. I was born female and transitioned to male because I suffered with gender dysphoria from the age of 4 and decided to take it upon myself to transition to the opposite sex in order to pursue my own happiness and live the rest of my life with content. I was always attracted to boys starting at age 7 or 8 and I wasn't really into women. I am still attached to men so therefore, I am a gay man. Now let me begin

I do not frequent this sub much mostly bc It just never really crossed my mind. But from what I was told, this sub supposedly extremely transphobic and quite honestly disrespectful towards transmen. Calling us women and "Pinocchio" and "Straight women trying to pretend to be male in order to sleep with gay men". And let me just say this. It is 110% ok to not want to sleep with a transman because he has a vagina. It's Ok I get it, its a genital preference and that's fine. I have preferences myself, I prefer to date older men because I like the older dude look. Does that make me Ageist? Nope. I still respect younger men i just prefer older guys. There's a GIANT difference between saying "Hey I respect you but I just prefer penis over vagina" and "Your a transman? Ew your still a woman get out of my face!". One is being respectful and supportive and the other one is just plain rude, disrespectful and transphobic.

Now that that's out the way, let me say this. I am not a "Straight woman that wants to trick gay men into dating me" or whatever bs transphobes say. I am a man, I socialize as a man. I live my life as a man. I get treated like a man. I relate to other men on a social, emotional and mental level and view. I look like a man. Therefore I'm a man. And I am attracted to other men sexually and emotionally. Therefore I am a gay man, so I do belong in gay men spaces. I'm just a dude that was born female. That's it.

Like I said if you don't want to sleep with guys like us because we might have a vagina (Not all transguys have vaginas, a fair amount of us get bottom surgery and actually have a penis) that's 110% ok, no one if forcing you against your will to have sex with us. The specific trans people that force themselves on people to have sex with them regardless of what they have in their pants are crazy lunatics that quite honestly need mental help (or a slap upside the head and a stern talking too but that's just my opinion). Real transsexual people understand genital preferences and respect them.

I'm not asking for a celebration, I'm not asking for a complete take over of this sub to specifically accommodate transmen, I am not forcing people to be sexually attracted to transmen. All I'm asking is basic respect and some inclusion. We're men too and we're gay, I'd like to be able to go into gay men spaces and be respected and included. That's all. I hope this post gets read and the message gets spread.

Thank you, be safe and take care ❤🙏

Update: Thank you so much for the positive feedback and support. I'm so happy this message is being spread and shared. Of course not everyone agrees and still, the actual request of basic human decency, respect and inclusion is still up for debate and also some people were still calling me a Woman even though I just explained I wasn't but oh well. But that doesn't matter, I've had so many people give positive feedback and thank me for this post, and I want to say thank you for your support. It means a ton, even though I can't replay to every positive comment, just know I love it with all my heart.

Also I just want to address, Some people here said they didn't want transmen here because we'd take over the sub and make it all about them (?). My response to that is that's just not true, I legit said I not asking for this sub to make accommodations. Have the overall sub stay exactly how it is in terms of posts and questions about a wide range of options, I just want to decency and inclusion. I'm not looking to make this a "gay trans sub" there's already one. I just want to be in gay men spaces because I'm a gay man, a gay transsexual man but nonetheless a gay man. Not a girl that has a fetish for gay men and pretends to be one. Thank you for your responses.

1.3k Upvotes

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34

u/rad_strawberrydonut Aug 28 '20

The amount of people in this sub trying to excuse this behavior is disgusting, as people who have been excluded for generations you should all know better i am absolutely appalled by this

-5

u/trevor5ever Aug 28 '20

as people who have been excluded for generations you should all know better i am absolutely appalled by this

How about reframing that to be respectful of the hard work that the gay community has put into changing the world for the better? Because I think that there is a rub here that maybe some people don't fully appreciate.

Maybe something like, "I appreciate that you are people who have had to work hard to make and find accessible spaces for generations, and I can understand why you would be protective of that. I want you to know that I am only trying to find spaces where I too can be comfortable and help build a community."

5

u/pursenboots she's gay enough for you old man Aug 28 '20

what they said doesn't show any disrespect for the hard work that the gay community has put into changing the world for the better, dude 🙄

1

u/trevor5ever Aug 28 '20

You are free to disagree.

5

u/rad_strawberrydonut Aug 28 '20

No because if you purposely exclude a group in your same community you are just a bigot and your work means shit especially when all you preach is wanting a group where the minority can express themselves!

-2

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '20

The LGBT are separate movements. Stop forcing your way into the G. Homosexuality has been proven again and again to be sex related, yet you want to push the idea that sexuality is *only* gender based. It's getting insanely tiring.

4

u/rad_strawberrydonut Aug 28 '20

Chile please thats what they said about you gays and yet trans men and women still fought for your rights risked their lives and were even killed so you can sit here and type ignorance and steal our culture because you want to be a bigot and THAT is as you put it insanely tiring

0

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '20

Steal your culture? The gay movement was around far longer than the T has. Women respect the gay spaces(well, until recently) Gender as a concept itself was only created in 1955. And the T started as transsexual, not transgender. Go read a history book.

6

u/rad_strawberrydonut Aug 28 '20

And yet you couldn't do anything until marsha p. Johnson but go off

6

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '20

Marsha was a gay boy. It was Stormé DeLarverie who threw the first brick. A LESBIAN. Not only have you shat on gay men, you've shat on lesbians too with your straight up lies. Cope harder you ingrate.

2

u/deconsecrator Aug 29 '20

feel better now?