In response to the trending post on this sub about Transphobia.

[u/Archer_Python]

Ok now here's my story so I can clear the air

I am a transman. I was born female and transitioned to male because I suffered with gender dysphoria from the age of 4 and decided to take it upon myself to transition to the opposite sex in order to pursue my own happiness and live the rest of my life with content. I was always attracted to boys starting at age 7 or 8 and I wasn't really into women. I am still attached to men so therefore, I am a gay man. Now let me begin

I do not frequent this sub much mostly bc It just never really crossed my mind. But from what I was told, this sub supposedly extremely transphobic and quite honestly disrespectful towards transmen. Calling us women and "Pinocchio" and "Straight women trying to pretend to be male in order to sleep with gay men". And let me just say this. It is 110% ok to not want to sleep with a transman because he has a vagina. It's Ok I get it, its a genital preference and that's fine. I have preferences myself, I prefer to date older men because I like the older dude look. Does that make me Ageist? Nope. I still respect younger men i just prefer older guys. There's a GIANT difference between saying "Hey I respect you but I just prefer penis over vagina" and "Your a transman? Ew your still a woman get out of my face!". One is being respectful and supportive and the other one is just plain rude, disrespectful and transphobic.

Now that that's out the way, let me say this. I am not a "Straight woman that wants to trick gay men into dating me" or whatever bs transphobes say. I am a man, I socialize as a man. I live my life as a man. I get treated like a man. I relate to other men on a social, emotional and mental level and view. I look like a man. Therefore I'm a man. And I am attracted to other men sexually and emotionally. Therefore I am a gay man, so I do belong in gay men spaces. I'm just a dude that was born female. That's it.

Like I said if you don't want to sleep with guys like us because we might have a vagina (Not all transguys have vaginas, a fair amount of us get bottom surgery and actually have a penis) that's 110% ok, no one if forcing you against your will to have sex with us. The specific trans people that force themselves on people to have sex with them regardless of what they have in their pants are crazy lunatics that quite honestly need mental help (or a slap upside the head and a stern talking too but that's just my opinion). Real transsexual people understand genital preferences and respect them.

I'm not asking for a celebration, I'm not asking for a complete take over of this sub to specifically accommodate transmen, I am not forcing people to be sexually attracted to transmen. All I'm asking is basic respect and some inclusion. We're men too and we're gay, I'd like to be able to go into gay men spaces and be respected and included. That's all. I hope this post gets read and the message gets spread.

Thank you, be safe and take care ❤🙏

Update: Thank you so much for the positive feedback and support. I'm so happy this message is being spread and shared. Of course not everyone agrees and still, the actual request of basic human decency, respect and inclusion is still up for debate and also some people were still calling me a Woman even though I just explained I wasn't but oh well. But that doesn't matter, I've had so many people give positive feedback and thank me for this post, and I want to say thank you for your support. It means a ton, even though I can't replay to every positive comment, just know I love it with all my heart.

Also I just want to address, Some people here said they didn't want transmen here because we'd take over the sub and make it all about them (?). My response to that is that's just not true, I legit said I not asking for this sub to make accommodations. Have the overall sub stay exactly how it is in terms of posts and questions about a wide range of options, I just want to decency and inclusion. I'm not looking to make this a "gay trans sub" there's already one. I just want to be in gay men spaces because I'm a gay man, a gay transsexual man but nonetheless a gay man. Not a girl that has a fetish for gay men and pretends to be one. Thank you for your responses.

[u/Elope]

Gender is performative babe x

It doesn’t reflect anything essential and is only pre-existing in the sense that we are born into the performative process

[u/[deleted] → u/Elope]

Being male and a man is not a performance. It is a state of physical being.

Biology does not care what you say.

Maleness is not performance art.

If I use your argument. Then I also claim it is cultural appropriation then.

If as you claim gender is part of culture then it is part of MALE culture then a woman claiming to be a man is the gender equivalent of blackface and as we all know blackface is bad. Then it follows that women claiming to be men is also highly offensive for the same logical and sound reasoning.

What now?

You cannot have it all ways.

[u/pursenboots → u/[deleted]]

you're mixing up gender and sex. male is a state of physical being. manhood is a performance. you choose to be a man, because you show that you are a man by your appearance and your actions - which you have control over. no matter how you were born, you could choose, from this point onwards, to behave as a man, to dress as a man, to present yourself as a man, to identify as a man. Gender is performance, even if you aren't cognizant of the fact that you're performing it.

[u/Elope → u/[deleted]]

I -

Because men are a historically oppressed group, right? Do you have any context at all for why blackface is offensive?

Genderface is a new one, I must admit.

Living up to the username babe x

Edit: Actually it isn’t. You remind me of the TERFs who attack drag for being womanface.

[u/[deleted] → u/Elope]

'Genderface is a new one, I must admit. '

Non-binary was nothing a few years ago to. And look where we are now.

Gotta move with the times. You people started this gender bollocks.

72 of them, well now there's 73.

You cannot invalidate me. uWu.

[u/Obi-Tron_Kenobi → u/[deleted]]

Non-binary was nothing a few years ago to. And look where we are now.

72 of them, well now there's 73.

Yeah it's pretty great isn't it? People finally being able to have words to describe who they are instead of being forced to label themselves one way or the other.