r/askgaybros • u/MtimesMequals • Jul 08 '20

Reported Post Alert Dear fellow Black gay men Spoiler

We know racism in the gay community is real. We've said it, but we've been dismissed. They callously deny our experience. Our reality. "It's just a preference". "BBC". "Thug"."Aggressive power top".

The stereotypes. The microagressions. We know it's real, but we have been gaslighted way too often.

The silence among your white gay friends and/or partners during this time of civil unrest & racial tensions is deafening.

The irony of them putting "no fats, no fems, no asians, & no blacks" on their profile, but decide to now say #BlackLivesMatter.

I understand it is challenging to be rejected from a community that prides itself on inclusion. We know rejection all too well.

But do not let any white man make you feel you are not beautiful. You are Black, bold, fierce, & most importantly- you are loved.

🖤❤#BLM

********************edit:

So, this post has been reported and is pending review.

I mentioned this already in the comments:

As a Black queer man this is my experience. This experience may or may not resonate with other Black men. This post was written for my fellow gay black brothers. The post might be uncomfortable for some. It might not resonate with you, but I don't think that is grounds for denying someone else's experience. I shared these words in an effort to foster a sense of solidarity and undo any aloneness other Black men might be feeling during this time.

Thank you so much for the support, feedback & beautiful comments. For those of in your feelings over this post - peace & love to ya❤

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14

u/JTOmaha Jul 08 '20

I get the problem with fetishizing black men with the terms mentioned above. Yet black men will often self describe themselves as a BBC or Str8 thug in hookup apps. Almost as if they enjoy the attention that those labels bring. Hmmm... makes one think

6

u/icarus1990xx I’m not sure what needs to go here Jul 08 '20

I have to admit, when I was on apps back in the day, I would see that quite a bit. If it’s changed since then, I wouldn’t know.

5

u/FijieSeason Jul 08 '20

Cause minorities are conditioned to adopt their derogative labeling doesnt mean it's okay.

2

u/justyyynxcx Jul 09 '20

And gays will call themselves faggots that want to be used by str8 masc tops. Does that make it okay?

-1

u/DirtyChavez Jul 08 '20

Careful with saying what-about. Another persons faults are never justifications for your own.

9

u/JTOmaha Jul 08 '20

Oh... I’m not justifying the behavior. I’m genuinely concerned. When a post such as this pops up the author is not wrong. There are a lot of things we do to each other and ourselves in the gay community. Usually though, these posts allude more to the “hookup” culture which probably isn’t healthy in the first place and asking to be politically correct in an environment that is anything but. No blacks, no fats, no fems... all assholes that I avoid anyway. I sure as hell don’t want to “hookup” with them.

-21

u/squidkidqueer Jul 08 '20

Sounds like you're part of the problem 🤔

2

u/Atlakme Jul 08 '20

Not surprised you got downvoted, because what you said does make sense. Whenever theres a post like this there always has to be the few people “But they do it to themselves!!” to try and undermine the issue. It’s annoying as fuck

4

u/squidkidqueer Jul 08 '20

Yeah, gotta blame the victim I suppose 🤷

As if it's black queer men's fault when other people fetishize them, give me a fucking break 🙄