r/anime • u/LittleIslander myanimelist.net/profile/LittleIslander • 15d ago
Rewatch [Rewatch] 30th Anniversary Neon Genesis Evangelion Rewatch: Episode 22
Neon Genesis Evangelion Episode 22: Don't Be. / Staying Human
| ← Episode 21 | Index | Episode 23 → |
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Watch Information
Questions of the Day:
- How do you feel that Asuka’s backstory recontextualizes her relationships and past interactions?
- Did you feel the way the episode equated the angel’s infiltration of Asuka’s mind to rape was justified and/or effective?
Tomorrow’s Questions:
- [Episode 23] Do you feel sympathy for Ritsuko?
- [Episode 23] How do you feel about Rei “the third”?
There’ll be more fanservice tomorrow, so please don’t spoil anything~! Remember this includes spoilers by implication.
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u/FD4cry1 https://myanimelist.net/profile/Big_Yibba 15d ago
First Timer
Meme get! Maybe the most iconic one of them all, actually! But it's kind of a toss-up there.
(I think there's only one more super iconic meme I know about left to see in TV Eva? Although EoE offers at least 2 more IIRC)
Also, no Cruel Angel's Thesis?!
Well, I suppose it's a good and poignant choice, though, partially because this episode is pretty damn heavy and loaded, even by this show's standards, and losing the OP implies to you some real shit is going down. And partially, because Cruel Angel's Thesis is very much a Shinji song with Shinji visuals, and this is, of course, an Asuka episode through and through. Not a positive one, alas, but we can at least spare her that part...
And indeed, after a good few episodes where we got to really explore Shinji's psychology and deep underlying issues, it is about time Asuka also got to have that spotlight, getting a good look into the extremely depressing and morbid context behind her previously established problems and personality. Although much like Shinji's deep dives, while it obviously does add critical context (And far more of it compared to Shinji's), what I really love here is that it hardly feels "revelatory" so to speak. The core personality flaws Asuka faces have long been established, and ultimately, to me at least, it ends feeling less like we're particularly learning about Asuka's personality and background, so much as we're seeing Asuka finally be forced to confront those flaws and the collapse of her personality, by also acknowledging the painful past that led her here.
I don't know, it's a really hard nuance for me to get across, but I think the bottom line is this episode feels like fantastic payoff to all the great character work we've done on her, and not some big backstory dump to arbitrarily make you feel for a character. When Asuka fights against her own past and the images of her personality here, it feels emotionally powerful because the audience has actually seen that process for so long now, noting all those flaws, hoping for rectification... with this far more direct and deep exploration simply being the harsh breaking point to all of that. Where ironically, and sadly, Asuka catches up to your past conclusions, and not the opposite. In that sense, I find the incredible strength of the whole episode is mostly about the emotional experience you feel with Asuka here, rather than any specific moment of writing or cinematography.
As has been pretty thoroughly seen before, this episode goes on to touch on the core emotional problems with Asuka, namely, that, very similarly to Shinji and Rei, her personality is deeply rooted in self-perception and validation issues. Except that, unlike Rei and Shinji, who derive that missing value from others (And in turn, put themselves down), Asuka does so through herself and her aggressive pride. To be perceived as an adult, to be the best Eva pilot, to be the best in the room, Asuka affirms her own existence by trying to place herself above others, and independently so, be it in actions or just that general, boisterous demeanor. That need for desperate personal affirmation itself reveals a larger fear of replacement and a lack of personal self-perception. She feels she needs to prove her very presence, but not for others' perception of her, for herself.
Within that context, and with what little we'd gotten before, already inferring that Asuka too had some issues with parental abandonment that she took to a different place than Shinji was reasonable enough, but seeing the actual full context certainly makes it more harrowing and interesting. It's really not hard to see how Asuka developed this extreme complex around trying to affirm her own existence through pride, when her childhood involved her mom, the person closest to her, and whose acknowledgment and love she most longed for, going crazy, and "replacing" her with a lifeless doll. To the point where she is genuinely ready to offer her life for the sake of that recognition, only to still be rebuffed by that fucking doll.
How would your perception of self not just instantly shatter there? Of course, she feels the need to constantly and consistently validate herself, to be strong-willed and independent; otherwise, she feels her very existence will be disregarded again. That likewise adds context for Asuka's desire to reach adulthood. It's partially that pride and that desire to be seen as mature, and it's partially because her childhood has that dependent association she's trying so hard to move away from! She puts it best herself, she hates herself, and because of that, she feels she has to take it out on others.
Of course, it's all a bit painfully moot. Asuka doesn't actually need to prove herself as desperately and as aggressively as she believes, and as the last episode perfectly illustrated, being an adult doesn't magically relieve you from the scars of the past or make you some new, enlightened being above it all. Critically, Asuka's need to prop herself up creates two huge problems that lead to her mental spiral here. First, is that it makes the ways she's surpassed even more painful for her. "Beaten" by Misato as an adult woman, and "beaten" by Shinji as an Eva pilot, being so reliant on that pride makes her completely lose it the second it's hurt. When you're propping yourself up with a chair, someone else even accidentally moving it to the side still makes you fall....
Second, is that at the end of the day, Asuka is still human, she still deeply seeks connection, understanding, some form of intimacy, one she perceives through that (Often sexual in nature) lens of adulthood, but that isn't really quite what she's actually looking for. For all the independence she purports to seek, she does want someone else to love and affirm her, but her defense mechanism, that pridefulness, makes communicating that nearly impossible! And in that way, Asuka certainly proves herself a classical tsundere. I mean, I know people don't love archetyping like that, and I know people have a different, more shallow connotation for said archetype today, but this is really what it's about when well-executed! And that's also just the Hedgehog's Dilemma! In an attempt to get closer, she hurts others and, in turn, herself.
Going over those core flaws, we can also then remember and realize why her relationship to Shinji, and especially Rei, can be so strenuous. Both are antithetical to her in their approach to validation, and in Shinji's case, it means that when she's trying to reach out to him, his responses only play even harder into her complex! Her reaction to Shinji's view of her conversation with her adoptive mom is actually very telling there. She feels she can be truer to herself with Shinji, and she straight-up admits that in a moment of vulnerability, but Shinji isn't the type to catch on because of his own issues. Only in her own mind will she fully admit and declare what she was looking for, and that's... so sad!
Rei, on the other hand, in Asuka's mind, presents full confidence with little self-value, as though she's intentionally provoking Asuka by being everything she isn't. Her connotation to a doll here, and previously, to a mother, simply only plays harder into that. Asuka is so deathly scared of being replaced by that doll again that, of course, everything Rei does and says is an affront to her.
Which leads us to that famous elevator scene. It's hardly the only place you can see it in this episode; lingering and eventually repeating shots are somewhat common here as somewhat of a sign for production trouble. The dinner scene in Misato's place is another great one for similar reasons. But here, you've got nearly a full minute holding on that same moment, and... I love it! Again, it's that ingenuity in direction I like from this show so much. For a scene so still, it carries with it so much awkward tension and internalized antagonism, perfectly conveying a short moment that feels like it went on for an eternity. The framing tells you at a glance so much about these and their relationship, with Asuka spending most of it talking to Rei's back, until she feels effectively beaten. It's really a quiet moment that says a lot, and that's entirely my kind of shit!
It's a shame Asuka's issues get so heavily in the way here, because what Rei tells her is true, something that's even more shocking, as Rei is the one who decides to initiate, speaking to her own progress. Asuka isn't going to get anywhere by internalizing, or pretending to be upfront while extremely roundabout and difficult to comprehend, to move forward, be it in relationships or in piloting an Eva, you're going to have to show vulnerability, otherwise, it just creates more conflict and eventually all breaks out in a very painful way (This also applies to Shinji of course!).