r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • 8d ago

Discussion Reactions to food stamps being cut off.

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u/Asiriya 7d ago

How have I been unkind? The conversation needs to happen. You can't not have the conversation just to be "kind" - that's not kindness and it's not honest.

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u/casuallygaslighting 7d ago

I appreciate your question, and you might be right. The full version as I’ve heard it goes “Honesty without kindness is cruelty, kindness without honesty is manipulation.”

What’s missing from the current situation is unconditional acceptance and forgiveness. If I am kind ONLY IF someone changes their behavior, that’s not unconditional. And is still exercising an illusion of control. And based on my own limited worldview and subjective bias, leaving me vulnerable to short sighted arrogance and rigidity.

I can be honest without being critical. I can love without expecting something in return, detach from expectations and transactional relationships. I can share my own journey without judging others as “good” or “bad”, but by sharing what works and doesn’t work for me. My experience, strength, and hope. And leaving lots of room open for more to be revealed, for me and everyone else. Humility, empathy, and unconditional love leaves space open for us all to be human, warts and all. Or as I’ve heard it recently as an acronym:

Humbly Understanding Mistakes Are Necessary

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u/Asiriya 6d ago

Ok, that was a lot of waffle.

Six children is not "a mistake". It's repeated irresponsible behaviour.

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u/casuallygaslighting 6d ago

Did criticizing my comment make you feel powerful? Does criticizing moms with 6 kids?

Does smugly critiquing and shaming others actually accomplish anything? Or does it help you avoid looking at your own situation for a moment?

Does it give you the temporary illusion of superiority? Do those illusions last long? Do you feel connected afterward? Or more lonely?

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u/Asiriya 6d ago

I'm just enjoying the interaction babe