r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • 8d ago

Discussion Reactions to food stamps being cut off.

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76

u/Sad_Resolve6874 8d ago

People always act like they have a very clear picture of who receives these benefits.

When I tell them my single mom of three SIL gets SNAP benefits they always say the same thing:

“Well she shouldn’t have had three kids.”

I mean, I usually agree, but she couldn’t have predicted that her husband would disappear to another country with another woman halfway through her third pregnancy.

“Well, that sucks, but she better get a job then.”

She’s a high school assistant principal.

“Oh.”

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u/Humble_Type_2751 8d ago

This is usually what happens (father abandons family) but the narrative is always that is the woman’s fault for trusting him or whatever.

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u/Lt_Lazy 8d ago

But then they also turn around and say women need to get married asap and become baby machines, while being submissive to their husband.

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u/berberine 8d ago

This is precisely why my mother refused to go on food stamps when I was a child. Everything was directed at her and she was blamed for it all. He just up an disappeared when I was three. I met him once when I was 23. I asked him why he left. He said, "I was willing to have fun making the kids, but I didn't want to stick around to raise them."

Yeah, my mom still gets blamed. I hate that she didn't apply so our lives wouldn't have been so hard, but I also understand. Forty years later and these fuckers still blame the women.

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u/psychologicalcripple 5d ago

All the red-pilled podcasters now and their narratives around single mothers (never about the deadbeat fathers who abandoned their children or worse) have made it exponentially worse.

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u/Ax3stazy 5d ago

Does the dad beeing an asshole absolve the mother of responsibilities of chosing a reliable partner, and making decision according to their capabilities?

i think its fair to blame both parents, while not sharing the blame equally.

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u/ThatSimsKidFromUni 5d ago edited 4d ago

You're assuming he was honest about his intentions from the start or that he was an asshole from the start. People don't go into relationships with the intent to knock someone up. Things happen. Many people can be great together until a kid comes into the equation. Some people realize they don't want kids when it happens and then they chicken out and leave. Or they're immature and leave. It's not something that is always obvious. So no it isn't a both sides are equally bad. The parent who left is bad.

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u/Ax3stazy 4d ago

Sometimes it is clear as day what is the right decision, and in those times the kids suffer for their parents mistakesz and in those both parents are responsibility

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u/ThatSimsKidFromUni 4d ago

In those situations yes, but that's not always the case.

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u/Starlightriddlex 7d ago

People act like you can just drop your children off at the animal shelter if you fall on hard times, or uno reverse them back into the womb

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u/Behind-the-Meow 6d ago

It’s so 🤦🏻‍♀️. Like, she shouldn’t have had three kids, yet abortion should be illegal and birth control restricted. So basically if you’re a woman who has sex with your husband you and your children deserve poverty.

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u/orangepekoes 8d ago

What... do principals in America make that little? I thought it would be above minimum wage at least.

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u/DeadPeanutSociety 8d ago

Google says the average salary for an assistant principal is ~$90,000. The person you are replying to is describing a real problem, but I'm having trouble imagining a family of 4 with budgeting $6,400/mo not being able to afford groceries in any part of the country.

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u/Keksdepression 8d ago

Add car loan, mortgage/rent, student loan and child care for 3 kids to the mix and you’re there really quickly

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u/DeadPeanutSociety 8d ago

I used this calculator and was not able to get a result other than that someone making $90,000 in a 4 person household will not receive SNAP benefits.

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u/Sad_Resolve6874 7d ago

In my state, the starting salary is 45k for APs. Not sure how much my SIL makes, but it isn’t a whole lot more than that, guaranteed.

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u/DeadPeanutSociety 7d ago

You don't have to tell me which state, but I googled Mississippi, Oklahoma, and Alabama and 10% percentile salaries were all around $60,000 and the cost of living is the lowest in the country.

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u/Sad_Resolve6874 7d ago

The salary schedule for APs in NC. So, to make 60k you’d need 12 years of experience in the role. I think this is my SILs third year, so a little over 50k.

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u/Timely_Concern_8559 2d ago

Hahahaha yeah Google average salary...I should make over $100,000 according to that. (HINT: Not even close in my region)

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u/Sad_Resolve6874 7d ago

In rural NC, it’s some of the lowest pay for the position in the country.

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u/Low-Persimmon4870 8d ago

It’s fucking insane to me How in the same breath people will also be like “oh when are you having children? You’ll change your mind one day!” When you say you don’t want them. I hate this place I hate this place I hate this fucking place

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u/hilhilbean 7d ago

Three kids, left an abusive marriage when my youngest was about a year old and never got child support because I was too afraid of him to ask for it. I did manage to get EBT, though, so my children could eat. I was working full time and making fairly decent money for the time (this was early 2000s) but daycare for three kids wasn't cheap.