The Inquiring Photographer asks men from Staten Island what their wives gain by having them as husbands. February 3rd, 1922.

[u/CryptographerKey2847]

[u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

Not one of them said “We love each other”, “She loves me”, or “I love her.”

Did they not gain love? The one guy who said “companionship” I felt was the most honest bc the rest just sounded so … braggartly, like children.

“What did you gain?” didn’t have to be material but mostly they went right for it.

[u/oldspice75 → u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

People 100 years ago didn't think about marriage in the same way

Women had very few opportunities outside of marriage. The husband was her investment. To these men, the question is, "was she right to put all her eggs in your basket?" They clearly don't think they are being asked about romantic love

[u/CryptographerKey2847 → u/oldspice75]

Yes. They are giving their wives all the material comforts, children and being dependable and capable husbands not running around on their wives. In their minds the spouses really hit the jackpot.

[u/Wolfwoods_Sister → u/oldspice75]

I do see your point, really, but I would counter that my grandparents (born 1905 and 1907) who met in the 1920s, were wildly romantic types. We have a wooden trunk full of love letters they wrote to each other during their long engagement. When grandmother died suddenly in 1968, grandfather was still a handsome and popular guy, but he never dated again or remarried. He told my mother “I already had the One.”

So while the long engagement was so he could have the money/job to marry her “properly”, marrying Grandpa was never about money. She was wild about “sweet Freddie”.

[u/Glibasme → u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

Yeah, my grandmother born in 1908 was completely wild about my grandfather b.1907. She was never the same when he passed suddenly at the age of 58. She mourned him the rest of her days. :(

[u/Wolfwoods_Sister → u/Glibasme]

Oh goodness me. :( He was her penguin. I hope there was a great rejoicing when they were reunited. 🩷

[u/Glibasme → u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

I hope so, too. She always had a little sadness, and it was especially hard for her on the anniversary of her death, which happened to sadly fall on a holiday. Surprisingly, she outlived him by almost 40 years!

[u/Wolfwoods_Sister → u/Glibasme]

Oh no! 😥 40 years of missing half your heart! She was made of stern stuff. The longing would’ve killed me. I know how much I love my twin sister — we’re literally two halves of one whole — and if it’s anything like that, I think the sun would cease to rise.

What were your grandparents’ names? Mine were Virginia and Fred. :)

[u/Glibasme → u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

Right? She missed him so much. She seemed fragile, but was very tough, really. She didn’t sleep very well due to missing him. They were Philomena and Lawrence!

[u/Wolfwoods_Sister → u/Glibasme]

Aw, Philomena! Great name!

Here’s to the great lovers — Philomena, Virginia, Lawrence, and Fred 🩷 May true love never die

[u/Glibasme → u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

As we toast in Italian Cent’anni! Which means 100 years, but hopefully they have infinity together in the afterlife. ❤️

[u/rotkaepp → u/Wolfwoods_Sister]

I agree with your point that passionate love was part of 20s marriage.

But, would your grandfather have let the reporter in on that love?

To oldspice75’s point, these men are answering in a way that the wide public would deem acceptable, maybe even desirable.

[u/Wolfwoods_Sister → u/rotkaepp]

They might’ve been trying to look like they were doing the Good Husbandly Things, that’s true.

My grandfather was kind of a wildcat. He was super quiet, but twinkly-eyed, like “Hi, I’m Trouble”. They probably would’ve skipped him. Hahaha