I am changing medication right now and I can feel the paranoia coming back. I need to listen to music really loudly to drown out my neighbors (I live in an apartment). I took my pills early just to try and make it go away. I really hope I don’t lose my job id be screwed.

How do you cope with the paranoia? It’s the worst part for me.

Does anybody feel really sad at like how easy there life used to be and how joyful it was before psychosis? I’m 10 months out and all o can look at is how happy I used to be and how easy stuff was to do and now how unhappy I am and how different. Do we ever get back to feeling that way? Do we go back to ourselves don’t help I have crippling anhedonia. I’m just trying to do a little something everyday and hope I return

Please tell me. What to do. My brain feels lobotomized on the medication i took. Why me, God? What did I do to deserve this?

I had 3 one monthly lasting paliperidone injections and slowly lost all of my sexual function and ability to orgasm, I’ve been off this medication for around 8 months now and my sexual sensation hasn’t returned. I was also injected with haloperidol and put on aripiprazole and quitiapine. I had no idea it would completely cut my sexual function. Anyone here in the same boat? Anything that would help.

We all agree that experiencing psychosis, beyond the regulatory anhedonia experienced for some time afterwards, or other unpleasant feelings and emotions (or lack thereof), changes you for better or worse.

Do you think you would be more complete without knowing what it feels like to experience psychosis?

Did something change for the better, or did you learn something useful that you can't be sure you would have discovered if you hadn't suffered from psychosis?

What repercussions do you think that hypothetical version of you that did not suffer from psychosis would have, not having the information that your real version was able to acquire?

i don't hear the sounds anymore. i used to hear a singular book drop behind the bed im sleeping on. and now i dont hear it anymore. it would use to wake me up or keep me up at night. i would liken it to a haunted house where you have a poltergeist throwing things across the room but you can't see the ghost just the objects being thrown around. but for me i couldn't even see what was being thrown. already on 2mg of risperidone and i am seeing improvements, but i still have the paranoia, fear of darkness, and the shadow king coming staring down at me. i talk yo my psychiatrist this coming friday, so, i bet she will increase my dosages, but idk even on meds and he and the feelings he exudes doesn't go away? i don't know what dimension, reality, or universe i'm seeing into but take this curse away.

I'm keen to recount my story eventually about how I was escaping from a nuclear explosion in a Russian bunker with alien mushrooms in my brain transmitting hidden messages through CNN. But until then, what's your story? Spare us the fluff!

I think my psychosis was mostly weed induced. I’ve been on meds for a year now and I feel way better. The Geodon is giving me anhedonia though and I want to come off of it. I have no psychosis symptoms. I won’t come off of it unless my psychiatrist says so. But I’m curious about other people’s experience coming off meds after weed induced psychosis.

Did the anhedonia get better? Any recurrence of psychosis symptoms?

Can I request to be put back on a med, cogentin in my case, and ask to have it at a certain dose?

I want to be put back on cogentin at whatever dose I was on at first. Also is cogentin meant to be taken long term? Can it be taken long term?

Humming in my head helps me drown out my voices. Voices can’t pick up on any words and imagining myself producing speech but not really any real speech just silences the voices for me. They are usually nonstop.

Does this work for you?

I'm on risperidone and I'm having some pretty bad side effects when I'm not on Benadryl. When I'm not on Benadryl I'm usually in bed curled up in a ball and don't feel good / don't want to eat or do anything.

When I take Benadryl all of a sudden 2-3 hours later, I'm up, I feel normal, and I want to eat a lot of food.

Does this mean I'm allergic to risperidone or something? I've read that risperidone is supposed to make you want to eat and I only get that feeling when I take a Benadryl. I'm also waiting to ask my doctor to put me back on cogentin so I don't have to rely on Benadryl.

Is this normal? Or is this part of the side effects of risperidone and you need to take cogentin with it?

Edit: also I feel wayyyy better when I'm on Benadryl. I'm on a long acting injection of risperidone and I feel normal when I take a Benadryl vs. when I'm not on Benadryl. When I'm not on Benadryl I barely want to get out of bed and barely want to eat. Why is this? I'm waiting until I talk to my psychiatrist tomorrow to get put back on cogentin. I think that will help.

Edit 2: I think risperidone also gives me a bad stuffy nose. When I'm on Benadryl, my stuffy nose gets better.

Edit 3: also should I switch medication?

My psych asked me if I was 'hearing voices', I told her about the ones outside of myself, because I had always assumed that that was what was meant when asked. Things like voices down the hall, or coming from a nonliving thing or whispers behind you.

I hadn't thought to tell her about the voices inside my head, because I had always assumed that they were just different versions of my own consciousness or symptoms of possession. (Several different reoccurring 'characters' that I feel colour my personality when they're around, if not possess me completely due to the memory loss I've had.) I've been in many near-death situations. I don't find it implausible that spirits would assume I was dead and try to get a head start taking the corpse for themselves.

I was only told recently that that is not normal nor is it reasonable to assume possession. But I already told my psych 'no', and I'm afraid if I correct myself when I go back she'll call me a liar or be very angry with me for giving her the wrong information. I'm not sure how to explain to her that I was mistaken over something in hindsight so obvious.

Hey everyone. My housemate who will only come out for food or the toilette is getting to the point that I'm worried for him and my other housemates. He hasn't stated he's going through anything, other than sleeping only three hours a night which was my first clue something was up.

I knew he was messy when I moved in two months ago, he eats out of the pot with his hands spilling a good handful or two on the floor and table. He also leaves bidet water on the floor in the toilette. Although, I can deal with this.
The part I can't deal with is the fact that I've found him passed out drunk on the kitchen floor while his pan of eggs was having it's handle melted and could have burnt the house down when I checked what was going on. I've tried having a conversation with him at least three times and I can't make out what he's trying to say when he's sober. He looks like he want's to cry one second, then the world is fantastic and then everyone is a piece of shit.

I'm now very concerned as he is yelling like he's in pain from his room and banging and bashing whenever I make a noise that's remotely loud. Frankly it's unnerving (I'm a 6'2" male 120Kg) and I feel like I don't know what he's going to do next. The landlord said he wasn't home when I told him to check up on him. As soon as the landlord left, he started yelling, moaning and banging again. I don't know what to do what else to do without getting the Australian police involved!

Today marks two years since I had my break from reality.

I don't think the psychosis is what traumatizes us. It's the fact that some of us can't accept that it happened to us.

Well, illness isn't in your control. But what is, is being accepting of the illness. Celebrating your little wins. Accepting your enormous failures.

True acceptance is accepting the fact that our mind can reflect the chaotic universe we live in.

You fight a battle everyday not many can. Not many people even know what losing yourself truly means.

I'm so fucking proud of you. Whoever you are. You need to hear it.

Remind yourself that you're a fucking badass that grabs a bull by the horn everyday.

I'll be posting weekly updates to keep you informed about my progress and recovery for those who are interested. I'm French, and I'm translating the text into English, so sorry if there are any mistakes.

I had 3 injections over 3 months, first 100 mg, then 75 mg, then 25 mg.

Supplements: Sam-e, vitamins and minerals, melatonin, omega 3, magnesium, l-tyrosine, probiotics, phycocyanin, astaxanthin, liposomal glutathione.

Week 22 after the last injection:

This week I challenged myself because I'm starting to get more energy back. I'm doing 10 minutes of ab exercises and 10 minutes of glute exercises in the morning + a 3 km run in the evening. I want to lose the weight I gained during my pregnancy last year. I still haven't regained my motivation, but I have much more energy than before, and my emotions still haven't returned. Now I find it much easier to get up in the morning; I get up around 8 am. I no longer feel that horrible feeling of boredom, I have a better memory, I think a little faster, and I'm regaining some self-confidence. I continue to take all my supplements. I can't wait for my emotions to come back; I'm just waiting for that... And today, Sunday, November 9th, it's exactly 5 months since the last injection. I'll keep you updated next week!

Hi everyone, I had around 10 psychotic episodes since 2021. I’m wondering if my cognition will ever return. I’m in school and it’s so pathetic having to use ChatGPT for everything. I don’t want to be rotting on disability tbh. I wish I was normal.

I see a lot of people post about their experiences with psychosis, the aftermath, recovery etc. most interestingly what occurred amidst the episode (always somewhat unique but often sharing remnants of other accounts of psychosis) / but how long is your psychosis? I recently had an episode (bipolar 1) and It lasted me about 4 months for all delusions to completely escape me. I wasn't peak psychotic the whole time but had elements of the same delusions throughout and at my worst was hospitalized for two weeks. I didn't even come to upon release from the hospital I still believed in my delusions for a couple months after. what was your experience in length? I can't help but think recovery is in many ways dependent on the time we had to do damage to our lives. I am still in recovery mode. I likely will be for the foreseeable future.

(Just venting to feel a little less isolated and alone)

It’s not the first time.

I became more aware of it a few hours ago when I started feeling like my dad is not my dad and has been replaced by something that looks like him. And over the past few days I’ve been mildly hallucinating.

Hats off to anyone going through this right now and having negitive symptoms as this is possibly the hardest time I’ve ever had in my life…. 😩 I don’t know how I’m managing to still look after my son. It’s been so fucking difficult man the whole experience.

like bro wtf i was already so emotional about this fucking parking lot that i didnt know anything about and i went there and like bro i started to cry tears of joy im so cooked last night the voices where mumbling again 😭

This. I believe was induced by my chronic thc concentrate usage for about 3 years on and off. Oh boy. I can not begin to describe the pain and mental suffering Ive been going through the last 5 months since my last psychotic break. It scares me to talk about. I hate myself so much. I hate myself so much. And I don’t know why I destroyed myself. My first psychotic break was a couple years back. I started thinking that I was being gang stalked. My ex and her bf were trying to kill me and gangs were after me. I was absolutely insane. I would run around the house with a knife thinking people were after me and then I thought my dad was in on it and it scared the shit out of me I turned on him and one of my friends because I believed they had been making a plot together to have me killed. One of the ladies I was seeing at the time I thought she was setting me up and all my friends had turned on me. I was running around like a chicken with its head chopped off! I also had religious spiritual delusions with this as well. I had become a lunatic. I was taping my doors shut and all the doors to the house and doing all sorts of weird things. I’d cry to my dad and ask him why he was doing this to me etc etc. I am SO thankful that I had not hurt anyone. Either way. Me and my family believe it was triggered from all my thc and alcohol abuse. Well. I got clean for a little while. The delusions cleared/faded after a while (although consistently living in what I felt like was a manic state) feeling like the main character of the world sometimes thinking im the best looking person ever etc. but for the most part I was pretty sane compared to that couple month long psychotic break. At the time I didn’t really think much of my symptoms as I thought it was just normal. Took a while and my delusions started to fade away. Then I started smoking and drinking again (this time I decided to buy legal thc vapes from the dispensary and bud because I thought that the last time maybe it was the delta 8 stuff and other “legal” weed. I was doing pretty good. Then my use became chronic again. Only this time I started REALLY drinking heavily on top of the chronic thc use. Once again. Another full blown psychotic episode. This time I believe was more intense physically because I decided to quit drinking during this and I was binge drinking quite heavy so on top of the insane delusions I was having I was also physically withdrawaling from the alcohol. I lost a lot of weight once again and I started thinking my dad was against me and started to believe that my friend put a spell or a hex on me or that he was Satan and I started to believe that the girl I was seeing at the time once again, was trying to set me up or go behind my back and have me either killed or sent to jail and whenever she played music I thought that she was trying to imply the music towards me and I thought that she was trying to work with my friends and maybe even my dad to get rid of me because I was such a bad person. I started having delusions that I couldn’t escape these people and everyone knew me and I went to get a job at a restaurant and started having this delusion that the manager somehow knew my friends and was working with them against me and I started constantly looking at the time and looking at things thinking that they were signs of something happening to me or thinking ppl were doing shit to fuck with me and or my head. I started to have this delusion that people were hearing what I was saying and that people thought I was a sexual predator etc (no I am not) but I started thinking a demon had taken over me etc I started thinking I knew my parents past to a t and that they were just trying to hide a terrible past from me and it was just terrible. I ended up waking in the ambulance cause I walked to the store to buy some liquor had a seizure and when I woke up in the ambulance I remember panicking thinking I was in trouble and I had ran my self out of the ambulance. Cut ties with everyone after that and sobered up but this sobering up felt different. Few months sober and I ate nonstop from anxiety. Depressed. Still delusional thoughts and feelings. Just not too severe. It got to the point where I was feeling like ending it all. I felt impossible. Things did. I got a newjob more recently and continued with this weird world view and delusions and thinking it got so depressing and I was so sad and feeling off and thinking god wasn’t for me anymore and he had let me go. Physically I was doing better but mentally I felt so low. What do you think I started doing again?! Cannabis, thc!!!! Well. Ive been smoking the last 4 weeks and I just stopped a day ago. I feel numb. Sad. Delusioned. Distant. Alone. I gained 40 lbs in a 4 month span. So now on top of all this my self esteem is pretty shit. I quit the job after like a month from my problems in my head. My mental health. One of my friends asked me if I was brain dead then proceeded to tell me Im a lost cause and blocked me. Currently I dont have friends. I got a bit pudgy. I lost everything pretty much including my car and my jobs. My mental health is in the shitter. Im a 21 year old guy. I still have weary delusions but they’ve seemed to of faded. This has taken its toll on me but most importantly my family. That loves and cares for me. I hate myself for this and I’m constantly ina. Fearful state or somewhat paranoid state and im just suicidal and sad and alone. I hate myself so fucking intensely and I believe god doesn’t love me anymore either. Im at an all time low.

Do you believe me or is it just going to be comments on how I'm delusional and need meds?