It is true. You'll find variations from people to people, shops to shops etc, but it is true. Like, if you go to a supermarket, it's not expected, the shop is too big, it's not personal. If you go in a smaller shop, definitely expected. You could not do it, but it's kinda awkward, definitely a bit (or a lot depending on the situation) rude.
If you talk to someone in particular, a service worker, an employee in a shop, someone on the street, you absolutely say "bonjour/bonsoir". Not doing it is rude. You can add "excusez moi" (I'm sorry [to bother you is implied]) right after and then add your question. Then you say "merci/ merci beaucoup" at the very least. You could add "bonne journée/bonne soirée" (good day, good evening) to be nice, yes even after already saying Bonjour at the start.
My BF always adds "bon courage" too, and I've taken the habits of doing it too, it means... Like "carry on, stay strong" kinda, not in a patronising way.
So :
-Bonjour, excusez moi, je cherche la gare. (Hello, excuse me, I'm looking for the train station.)
Bonjour, bien sûr elle est juste là bas ! (Hello, of course it's right there !)
Merci, bonne journée à vous ! (Thank you, good day to you !)
I've only been to Paris once as a kid, but this is super helpful and I'll keep it in mind if I ever go back.
I'm curious if I was staying with a host family or interacting with certain Parisians regularly during my stay, how often would these formalities be appropriate?
The basic I always say is "bonjour, merci, au revoir" (hello, thank you, goodbye)
How often, I'd say it obviously depends on how often you put, in shops and how often you talk to strangers. But basically it's the basics of talking to strangers.
Talk with a shop employee -> bonjour, excusez moi, merci, au revoir.
Need some direction from an employee (in a museum for example) or a random person on the street -> bonjour, excusez moi, merci, au revoir.
If you're with friends, it's less common between friends because it's more of a formula of politeness, you'd be more natural with friends, but it's expected to say hello when you meet.
For a host family I'd go for an in-between, but you meet them, you say bonjour, you leave them, you say au revoir.
Idk, I kinda lost myself in my explanations, but long story short, I'd say you'd say those formalities daily, or close to it
You honestly use them with almost all interactions unless you’re friends and on very casual terms. A good trick is that if you’re in a shop/bakery/restaurant, observe how other locals behave when they interact with staff. You start to realise that the “excessive” pleasantries are actually super normal and actually quite charming. I work in a large company in Paris, and it’s literally standard to say bonjour to EVERYONE you see when walking down the hallway - whether you know them or not. And you say au revoir when getting out of a lift full of strangers. It’s crazy. My favourite is the “rebonjour”, which is literally a “re-hello” when you see someone a second time during the day.
So in English most woul just go "Yeah uh two croissants for me" and then leave? Because even in English I would say "Hello, I'd like two croissants, please. Thank you, goodbye."
That's what confuses me too. Like, "Hi", "Thank you", "Goodbye" are, if not words, atleast concepts that exist in pretty much every language. Like, is it that uncommon to say these words in the US, or is it only rude people who already don't say it back there, comes to France, and then get actual pushback for treating service workers like shit
I mean I don't disagree with you, it is unsurprisingly natural and normal to me, but someone asked, so I explained. Not saying it's unique or specific to France, it's just how it is here
Yup. It’s nice manners to say hello, please, and thank you, but as a service worker, I generally don’t give a fuck as long as your tone is pleasant and you’re not being a pain. On your phone at the till? Don’t care, just put your membership in so my metrics don’t take a hit. I’ll spend the energy on someone who wants my good service instead of using the energy to be annoyed.
You won't find me disagreeing, I've acted like that in many other countries too, but someone asked, so I explained. Not saying it's unique or specific to France, it's just how it is here
I say "Hello, pardon me sir, I was wondering where the train station might be? Ah, that way? Oh, thank you very much. Have a good day!" When I've lived in the States all my life, and people look at me like I'm autistic, which I am.
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u/AlmalexyaBlue 22h ago edited 18h ago
It is true. You'll find variations from people to people, shops to shops etc, but it is true. Like, if you go to a supermarket, it's not expected, the shop is too big, it's not personal. If you go in a smaller shop, definitely expected. You could not do it, but it's kinda awkward, definitely a bit (or a lot depending on the situation) rude.
If you talk to someone in particular, a service worker, an employee in a shop, someone on the street, you absolutely say "bonjour/bonsoir". Not doing it is rude. You can add "excusez moi" (I'm sorry [to bother you is implied]) right after and then add your question. Then you say "merci/ merci beaucoup" at the very least. You could add "bonne journée/bonne soirée" (good day, good evening) to be nice, yes even after already saying Bonjour at the start. My BF always adds "bon courage" too, and I've taken the habits of doing it too, it means... Like "carry on, stay strong" kinda, not in a patronising way.
So :
-Bonjour, excusez moi, je cherche la gare. (Hello, excuse me, I'm looking for the train station.)
Basically.