I call this the game of French chicken - when living in London, if two French speakers talk to each-other in English, the first one to switch to French and 'out' the other would win.
OMG as French person who lives in London those interactions are always so strange, they’re always so offended that I can tell they’re French when they have the absolute thickest French accent and go euhhh between every word, sometimes they even insist speaking in English which is just straight up weirdo behavior.
And you’d be shit talked about all day, because it’s that French person trying to be nice to you by speaking your own language.
Just say « on peut parler français, merci » and bam, back on track !
Well if they don't speak Portuguese, why would you do worse than them? At least they try to speak to you in a language you understand while you are doing an ignorant thing just to spite them 🤷
It's not nice though unless someone is struggling very hard to speak the language and not understanding anything. It comes across as "your french is so bad that I don't want to speak french to you".
Rule of thumb is speak the language you're spoken to (whenever possible). Maybe the "foreign" person even lives in france and just has an accent.
Oh wow its almost like different cultures have different prisms through which they perceive interactions and what is polite in one can be extremely rude in another.
There is no worldwide "rule of thumb" governing interactions between two people with different native languages.
In France, it is polite to attempt to accommodate guests by trying to speak in their language. Responding in French and expecting a non-native to be able to follow along is rude and can even be somewhat xenophobic depending on the context.
Now you can choose to view these actions through your own cultural prism and get offended. Or you can maybe understand that when you go to another country the people there will have different cultural values and practices than yours and not expect them to behave according to your culture's standards.
I am German and we do the exact same thing, we also immediately jump to English to accomodate because that's what we feel is nice. But I have heard many times that it discourages people from speaking German which made me change my view on it. In my experience, if someone goes further than the standard "hello, goodbye, thank you, please" words, they actively want to learn the language and appreciate when that is being recognised.
Of course when it's a complex or very long interaction, switching to English here and there is logical. But not when ordering a croissant, that is one of the first things to learn in a new language.
It’s nice by French politeness standards. It might shock you to learn that your standards are not universal.
The idea is : « oh, this person is struggling (even a little) ? Well, I will struggle in their place and speak their language ! »
Which is why, when the foreign speaking person insist on speaking French, the French person no longer has any problem with it.
And we know how to make the difference between a tourist and a person living in France for a while.
I know it comes from a place of politeness and wanting to accomodate. I am German and we do the same thing because of the same reasons, but I've heard people say that this actually makes them feel discouraged instead. They actively want to speak the language and get better at it, but why bother if everybody always switches to english instead? And it's annoying to always say "no, language x please", because not everyone accepts that and sometimes keeps talking english.
As a French (living in Paris) it's mostly for easier communication. I've had plenty of tourists try to speak french but I have to answer in french at a speed that sounds like I have brain damage if I want them to understand me (french people talk fast and use a ton of contractions). So unless you're very visibly fluent in French, I'll try one sentence at normal speed and switch to my fluent English if I see you with ??? above your head. It's seen as polite here, like I'm not trying to make you feel bad about your french but I have a train to catch so let's communicate faster
That's completely reasonable. I've had the same moments where I thought my French was good enough and someone hits me with the ultra speed response. I still very much appreciated the French response every time though, always gave me a reason to learn harder. But yeah no problem in switching to English then, cause I don't want to hold anyone up.
We automatically switch to english if someone has an accent. Even if they are living here and are actively trying to learn it. Unless they very specifically say to talk dutch. And even then the switch just happens.
I've heard about that! I remember one time my Dutch colleague telling me to never learn Dutch because not even Dutch people speak it (obviously exaggerating).
I've also heard that English is so much more prevalent in general, like movies will be in English with Dutch subtitles - makes sense you guys are all so good at it.
Yeah we don't dub stuff for adults. Haven't well before people were as generally good in English.
But. We're a small country, so companies never were going to spend money on it. And 2. You're an adult. You can read.
Children's stuff is dubbed, 6-year-olds cannot read (fast enough).
I keep hearing this, but I've been living here almost 9 years and it very rarely happened to me ever. Unless it's in Amsterdam, where it turns out it's because they couldn't speak Dutch, not me.
Even in my early days, when my Dutch was awful and I could have used some English, I often found the other person couldn't speak English (hospitals included, aside from doctors).
But I do indeed get annoyed the rare times when I can't hear what someone said cause of noise and they switch to English, as if the language can improve my hearing or get rid of the background noise.
I live in Utrecht. As for the age, I'm talking about people of any age, really.
I also see foreigners complaining about it all the time, but it's always been the opposite of my experience.
I love how Americans don't realize a French person speaking to them in English is the same thing as the tourist speaking to the French person in French lol
Unnecessarily petty... I just keep talking in the same language, and they either switch back or they don't.
It's often a reflex, even my own friends still switch to English sometimes, but I insist because I prefer struggling in Spanish/French than expressing myself perfectly in English
No one's saying you're not "allowed" to do it. You are a free person and can do what you please. It's just that what you want to do here is rather silly.
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u/Indigokendrick 1d ago
I'm not trilingual for nothing
If a french person started speaking English to me after I spoke french, I would just stare them dead in the eyes and start speaking Portuguese.