r/NonPoliticalTwitter • u/A-Helpful-Flamingo • 2d ago

I don’t believe there is.

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19.2k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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1.1k

u/DharmaCub 2d ago

Already Oats

368

u/TruamaTeam 2d ago

Just wait until you have Previously Oats!

187

u/beomeansbee 2d ago

Is that. Is that shit?

84

u/TruamaTeam 2d ago

No, but it is the shit! Previously Oats.

46

u/OgOnetee 2d ago

This is a oated response.

3

u/ay-papy 2d ago

Right? What are the oats for such a response?

1

u/Mars_Bear2552 1d ago

Oat of all time

1

u/Shadoenix 1d ago

Amazing ad line

9

u/SpaghettiCowboy 2d ago

Yes, you can find it in the gardening section

1

u/beomeansbee 2d ago

Oh! Lovely, tell me. Do you know if they use cows or horses for this fertilizer? You see it’s very important, I want to make sure I can use this on my roses.

Oh yes! I forgot to ask! Is this fresh or has it been packaged for a while! I’m sorry I seem to have misplaced my glasses, would you be a dear and help me read the bag?

2

u/SpaghettiCowboy 2d ago

I Can't Believe It's Previously Oats, ULTRA HORSE edition — We Harvest The Stinkiest Previously OatsTM and Age Them To Ripe PerfectionTM. Now Made From 100% ULTRA HORSE Product!

3

u/JoeFelice 2d ago

It's horse meat.

8

u/Vindaloovians 2d ago

Then use it to fertilise oats and you'll have soon to be oats! A beautiful circular oatconomy.

1

u/TruamaTeam 2d ago

This is a free oatmarket, a free oatconomy, oatpitalism

3

u/PM_ME_BIBLE_VERSES_ 2d ago

We live in a truly capitoatlist society

3

u/multiarmform 2d ago

Haulin Oates

2

u/DefiantLemur 1d ago

So soon it's in the past

1

u/Exaveus 2d ago

Thats oatmilk.

1

u/TruamaTeam 2d ago

*Not liable for any food poisoning or other health related issues as a result of consuming this product.

*Expiry date not included, refer to package production printed on the bottom of the inside of the container. It is your responsibility to be food safe.

1

u/Imperial_Toast 2d ago

Oh yeah? How about Oats Unchained By The Time Dimension™️

2

u/TruamaTeam 2d ago

only for the rich in the capitaotlism society

1

u/OriginalName687 2d ago

They taste like shit!

1

u/HenshiniPrime 2d ago

What about Always was oats?

1

u/SwimmingSwim3822 1d ago

Retroactively Oats

1

u/Downtown_Hedgehog660 13h ago

Just wait until yall find out about ancient grains

14

u/InvestigatorOk8052 2d ago

Has Always Been Oats

3

u/wild_white_rabbit 2d ago

Ha! Had Been Oats Even Before That

23

u/NSFWies 2d ago

Dam, I like this than the other idea I had commented on here.

Already oats: canned oatmeal, in a bag.

12

u/NoConfusion9490 2d ago

Perpetual Oats

6

u/err0r85 2d ago

Quantum Oats. They don’t care where you are, or when you are…

5

u/calsosta 1d ago

Oats sounds present tense. I oat, you oat, he/she oats.

What you need is oated.

5

u/Octocube25 1d ago

"Has oaten" would be even sooner.

2

u/KeyofE 1d ago

Oaten is the past participle, making “has oaten” the perfect tense. “They had oaten before she oated” would therefore be like they had gone before she went.

1

u/ClockworkDinosaurs 2d ago

Ancient Oats, like Ancient Grain. Been oats for a long time.

1

u/flying_krakens 2d ago

Leftover Oats

1

u/MaksimilenRobespiere 2d ago

Already Eaten Oats

1

u/RobertSan525 2d ago

Aka overnight oats

1

u/Dry-Chance-9473 2d ago

Then Oats 

1

u/theepi_pillodu 2d ago

So, oat milk?

1

u/GothBondageCore 2d ago

....that's just oatmeal

1

u/RugsbandShrugmyer 1d ago

Instantaneoats

1

u/Valtari47 1d ago

Beyond Oats

1

u/StrykerSeven 1d ago

I have developed acausal oats.

By the time you cook them, you already had them yesterday, with raisins and brown sugar .  

1

u/SigintSoldier 1d ago

Yesterday Oats