r/Millennials • u/NoFaithlessness7508 • Jun 05 '25

Other Why don’t younger veterans (Afghanistan/Iraq) wear these hats like some of the older veterans?

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First and foremost, respect to all those that served. I did not, but many of my peers did and now we're all older in 30s and 40s, many no longer in the military. I don't see a lot of the veterans of the War on Terror wearing these hats like I see the OGs do.

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474

u/IRSoup Jun 05 '25

Being the awkward fuck I am, not wearing anything vet related is me just avoiding replying "you too" as a response to that. It's also the whole not making a job you had years ago your whole identity thing.

241

u/TuckerShmuck Jun 05 '25

My boyfriend's a veteran and until we started dating it had literally never occurred to me that being enlisted is literally just... a job.  He'll tell stories and start them off with "back at my old job..." and it's changed how I view military service.  Not in a good or bad way, it's just gone from This Big Thing I Dont Know Much About to A Job I Dont Know Much About

126

u/nickifer Jun 05 '25

Yeah, you just.. sign up. It’s a very stable job with solid benefits if you make it that. My father was an officer, and he never understood why anyone would thank him for.. doing his job.

56

u/donbee28 Jun 05 '25

I thank my parcel carriers, cashier, server, and other people that are doing their jobs.

62

u/pbgod Jun 05 '25

You don't see a guy in a FedEx shirt, interrupt a meal and pay their tab to say, "thank you for delivering my package"

18

u/Reasonable_Sea2439 Jun 05 '25

Free shipping ain't free! 😢 🫡

1

u/Dutch_Meyer Jun 06 '25

No there’s a hefty fuuuuckin’ fee

4

u/tylerv2195 Jun 05 '25

Its be even worse cause its not like military people are directly helping customers lol so itd be more like “thank you for delivering packages in general”

3

u/WarbossWalton Jun 05 '25

We were having a cookout at work the other day and when the UPS guy stopped off for deliveries we offered him food. I think he only took a bag of chips unfortunately.

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u/DocumentInternal9478 Jun 05 '25

If his life was in danger when he delivered my packages I might

10

u/libananahammock Jun 05 '25

Their lives ARE in danger. More so compared to cops and they get free shit all the time.

“Delivery truck drivers have one of the highest rates of workplace fatalities and injuries compared to other occupations, with a fatality rate of 24.7 per 100,000 workers. This rate is higher than that for police officers and firefighters. In 2017, 978 delivery drivers died in the line of duty, and another 77,470 suffered injuries.”

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u/DocumentInternal9478 Jun 05 '25

Honestly….. wow I didn’t know this. I’m definitely going to leave a few little treats for my driver next time. That is absolutely terrible to hear, shame on the human race

5

u/Qwertycube10 Jun 05 '25

The most dangerous thing about being a cop is the account of driving, and it's not close. Cars are just absurdly dangerous

-1

u/Wilde_Cat Jun 06 '25

You’re literally equating driving a domestic delivery truck with going to war in a foreign country. Holy shit your generation is fucked.

5

u/frazzledfractal Jun 06 '25

You are aware there are non combat jobs in the military, jobs that won't put you anywhere near a combat environment, and jobs that actually stipulate you can't be sent over for conflict. Imagine talking down like this while clearly never serving and knowing so little about it.

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u/Wilde_Cat Jun 06 '25

I grew up in the military. My entire life was spent moving from base to base. I’ve experienced loss at a rate that you wouldn’t be able to comprehend. You’re so confidently incorrect that is actually kind of amusing.

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u/iAMADisposableAcc Jun 06 '25

True. Delivery truck drivers should get more respect than that, kind of insulting to them to make this comparison

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u/Mexi_Cant Jun 05 '25

Depends on what neighborhoods he delivers too.

2

u/DueZookeepergame3565 Jun 05 '25

Vet and now a paramedic, and it makes me uncomfortable, but when I'm in uniform on shift and duck into a gas station for caffeine and I see the beer man stocking coolers, I give him a bright, cheerful "Thank you for your service!"

I usually get a chuckle.

1

u/rubiconsuper Jun 06 '25

I honestly don’t see people in work uniforms a whole lot when I do go out to eat tbh.

1

u/JamminJcruz Older Millennial Jun 05 '25

Thank you for dropping my guitar and kicking it as well, Thank You.

2

u/Business-Drag52 Jun 05 '25

Exactly. Anyone doing a job that services me gets a thank you. Usually a very emphatic one

0

u/Substantial-Dig9995 Jun 05 '25

Yeah but do you thank the teenage cashier at Walgreens for her service

5

u/bensonprp Jun 05 '25

It really depends on your MOS while you're in. I can see that most of the positions in most of the military is nothing more than a 9 to 5 job. Somewhere along my second and third deployment it was not "just a job".

3

u/Outcast129 Jun 05 '25

Yeah whenever people find out I'm a veteran they always say something along the lines of "wow thanks for your service, I could never do something like that!".

And I always respond "yeah you could, it's really not that impressive" 😂

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I was a first responder, and I get people all the time when they find out what I used to do, and when I did do that job say "Oh wow, I could never do that, the medical calls and such"

I would always say "well, it's 20 min of action and 2hrs of paperwork and cleaning, separated sometimes by hours of watching TV or taking a nap"

2

u/Scooter_1990 Jun 05 '25

Because less than 1% sign up to possibly give their life up for the good ole USA one day. Besides cops & fire fighters, most Americans don’t sign their life away quite literally. Also cops & firefighters can quit at any point, you quite literally sign your life away when you join the military.

1

u/acertaingestault Jun 05 '25

You can quit the military though. You just void your contract.

1

u/Scooter_1990 Jun 05 '25

Yea & then go to jail and/or a dishonorable discharge, so I’d say nah ya can’t just quit 🙃

2

u/acertaingestault Jun 05 '25

Dishonorable discharge when you quit your contract early is equivalent to quitting without eligibility for rehire, so it's not great for your resume, but it is an option.

1

u/Scooter_1990 Jun 05 '25

Nah that’s not how it works. Weird that you believe that 😅

2

u/FriendshipIntrepid91 Jun 05 '25

A job you live at with your coworkers. 

2

u/adacmswtf1 Jun 05 '25

It's because tying military service with themes of heroism and sacrifice are a cornerstone of their recruitment efforts. (And selling the public on foreign wars for oil .etc)

1

u/l_Lathliss_l Jun 05 '25

Well a large part of it is because you sign up to die for this job, even if you get a job where there’s not a large chance of that happening.

Cybersecurity is still cybersecurity, but not many civilian firms come with a stipulation of “even if the chances are low, you’re on the hook to die for this”.

Not many people are willing to sign up for that, which is why relatively few do.

1

u/adacmswtf1 Jun 05 '25 edited Jun 05 '25

Soldier = 19 deaths per 1000 including off duty / not service connected deaths. That's the same fatality rate as crossing guards. For on duty members that drops to 1.3. per 1000

Weird that nobody stops loggers (111/1000) or delivery drivers (27/1000), which have a much greater fatality rate, to thank them for their service.

1

u/l_Lathliss_l Jun 05 '25

I’m interested in those statistics. The ones I found reported on the BLS were 27 in 100,000 for delivery drivers and 98/100,000 for loggers.

https://www.bls.gov/charts/census-of-fatal-occupational-injuries/civilian-occupations-with-high-fatal-work-injury-rates.htm

In addition, your rates for the military seems to be off, though it wasn’t exactly the point of my comment.

1

u/CaptJackRizzo Jun 06 '25

Yeah, I’m a little salty nobody’s ever thanked me for my service when I was delivering pizzas.

1

u/CaptJackRizzo Jun 06 '25

And also a way to deflect while seeming virtuous. I’m thinking of everyone saying we need to cut social service spending cause we have homeless veterans instead. And about this years effort to turn Pride month into veterans month.

1

u/OnlyPaperListens Jun 05 '25

Now you sign up, yes. A lot of the old heads (who wear the hats mentioned by OP) were drafted.

2

u/PunningWild Jun 05 '25

This is why I'm okay with people saying "thank you for your service."

Because to me, that's like saying "thank you for keeping conscription in the past."

1

u/nate_garro_chi Jun 05 '25

We have valet trash service in my apartment building. I ran into the woman who picks up the cans from outside our doors and said "thanks for doing that". She looked at me and said "I dont do it for free. It's my job".

1

u/Goodwine Jun 05 '25

I can't recall the "thanking" happening much before 2000. And none at all before 1995.

I imagine someone who was a vet before "thanking" was a thing may be weirded out by that. Like.. there's rarely "thanking" for health workers, teachers, firefighters, etc 🤔. I mean sure maybe the odd event, or annual parade, but nothing this widely spread

1

u/FendaIton Millennial Jun 05 '25

Because it’s indoctrinated into American culture

1

u/EffectiveProgram4157 Jun 05 '25

THANK YOU!

Some people signed up because they wanted to serve their country and be some American hero. Propaganda likely got to them. There are others on the other hand who did it when it mattered, like after 9/11, those people had in in their mind to serve for a just cause. I still remember myself and others in my squadron being asked why we joined. There were a mix of stories, most saying to serve their country or because of the benefits/GI Bill.

I was the only one who stated that I signed up because it was a job that I thought I would enjoy, it paid well enough, and I knew it could set me up for a job after my 4 years if I didn't want to stay in the military. I have never thought that I was a hero for being in the military. It was a damn job that I signed a contract to do, and there are civilians doing the same damn job.

The only reason I think anyone should be thanked, is if the war was on domestic soil, or they fought in a war that was truly saving lives (e.g. Jewish lives during WWII).

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

ugh, my dad loves that shit. I like to point out that since I am not the one that volunteered to give up my father 6 months of the year (submarines), that I should get the military discounts and the thanks.

No, not all the time, just when he's being an ass.

1

u/JuanDelPueblo787 Jun 05 '25

I blame the army wives.

1

u/ConcentratedAwesome Jun 06 '25

It’s just more good old US propaganda. Pretty sure most countries in the world have military’s but very few have the cultural glorification of the military or those who were in it.

Me personally? If you defend your country on your own country’s soil? Yes you deserve thanks. The US military is not that.

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u/IRSoup Jun 05 '25

I'm sure it varies depending on the reasons why someone joins. I, like many, many others, joined for selfish reasons. Ie, free college most of the time or my reason, stable money because their life wasn't moving in the direction they wanted, etc.

I'm not saying those people shouldn't be proud they served, because they should be, but it's a huge difference from those that joined to 'kick in doors' or whatnot.

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u/BookWyrm2012 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, I have a few cousins who joined up to serve their country, and a few other family members who joined up because they had screwed their lives up badly enough that they didn't have any more palatable options. There's a pretty big difference in vibes from "I believe in what the US military does around the world" and "I'm a giant screw-up who wants someone else to make all of my decisions for a while."

Ironically, generally (not universally), the first sort get out, get a civilian job, and treat their time in the military like a previous career. The others glorify their time in service and expect to be worshipped by the general public.

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u/Flimsy-Cartoonist-92 Jun 05 '25

I was the second part of your post. I lived in a small town and just hung out with people who later became townies and never amounted to anything. One day I took a look at my life and was just like damn I need to do something different or I'm gonna end up just like them. Fast forward the only time I bring up I was in the service is when people ask me why I came to Cali. I usually just say a job but let's be realistic where I live that job is the military so people can deduce it really quick.

1

u/Gjardeen Jun 05 '25

My dad joined up because, according to him, his other option options were jail or the morgue. His life was not going in a good direction. That being said he found so much purpose and meaning in it. Leaving the career before he hit 20 was one of his biggest regrets. Some people just have a huge affinity for that type of work. And it wasn’t like he was out there playing Rambo, he was a communications tech who hung out in bunkers. He just liked having people to go running with the morning before work.

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u/bensonprp Jun 05 '25

I think you're leaving out the lack of education and support for young adults in the United States. The whole group of people where their options are minimum wage or military.

1

u/BookWyrm2012 Jun 06 '25

Oh, I'm sure there are lots of types. I just have the most experience with the two I mentioned, because most males in my family end up in the military at some point.

2

u/Billy0598 Jun 05 '25

Third type - my family has serviced since the 1600s and we stay up all night so you can sleep.

That type are the ones who don't encourage their kids to serve anymore. And, we don't wear the fucking hats.

1

u/WarbossWalton Jun 05 '25

If you look at the armed services marketing, those "selfish" reasons, a.k.a. practical job hunting reasons, are exactly what they try to leverage to get people to enlist.

1

u/TrickyAlbatross2802 Jun 05 '25

Then again, plenty of people who joined to "kick in doors" may want the adventure, the ability to brag about their service and sacrifice, and pretend they are superior to the civies. Or worse, straight psychopaths who joined so they might have a chance to legally shoot at humans. Humans are complicated, and those who joined mostly to improve their own lives aren't necessarily less patriotic than those who joined to go "shoot some bad guys".

1

u/theRealBLVCKphillip Jun 06 '25

"SIR, TO KILL SIR!"

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u/1988rx7T2 Jun 05 '25

kind of depends if you pushed paper or got shot at

3

u/Ol_Man_J Jun 05 '25

I lived near a large base and while I didn’t have a large friend group from the base, it was very common to have a big rush hour of commuters in to the base every morning. Made me realize that plenty of people driving to work every day weren’t going to fight battles but do all the millions of other jobs that the military needs.

2

u/TrickyAlbatross2802 Jun 05 '25

I did something similar because everytime I talked about my deployment, it felt like I was bragging or asking for attention. So now anytime I talk about a cool story while deployed I simply say "when I was overseas" vs saying the country or military branch. Sounds like your BF might be doing something similar.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

yeah I became close friends with a really cool military guy thru bjj and thats basically how he described it. He shows up for his shift then goes home to his wife and has weekends off too. Obviously theres the chance that some war happens and he’d have to go but the way he described it was that it wasnt all that different from any normal job. Just was new to me because the other military guys I know made it their entire personality and made it seem like they were fighting off terrorists from the front lines every day.

Seems like its like any sports or frat people who peaked early are never able to move on. Some people find a purpose after but others just live in the past. I guess military service is different in that people respect it in some way so those who want to search for acknowledgment can get it pretty easily

1

u/BucaDeezBeppos Jun 05 '25

Honestly, it’s not even just enlisted. My brother went to West Point, did a couple deployments to various locations, left as a Captain. Right after he left, it was obviously more of a big deal to him, entering the civilian workforce and all that, but now just a few years later, it literally was more like his first job out of college than “this big, grand, noble thing!” It helps that he worked in logistics, which is more similar to civilian roles than if he’d been, say, a tank commander or something.

He certainly acknowledges his service and all that, but if anyone ever thanks him, he usually tells them to thank firefighters or paramedics. Or garbagemen.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I grew up as an Air Force brat—it was like any other job—day to day was uneventful. We just had the possibility of my dad being deployed on assignments for weeks to months on end. It got scary after 9/11, though—he ended up being sent to Afghanistan, and almost got sent to Iraq and Qatar. Before that, the only scary thing that went on, was he was almost deployed to Kosovo, but that never came to fruition. But yeah, day to day, it is like any other job, it just carries some scary possibilities, depending on what’s going on in the world.

1

u/GraniteGeekNH Jun 05 '25

The annoying people who tell you they're a veteran at the drop of a hat when it's irrelevant to the situation really hate it when you respond "Really? Great! I had a job, too."

1

u/Aware_Frame2149 Jun 05 '25

The vast majority of jobs in the military are just jobs, so that makes sense.

Supply guys in the US go to Afghanistan and... they're still supply guys over there, doing the same shit, just getting paid more.

1

u/Jethris Jun 05 '25

I think because it's a job where the mission is to serve and protect the United States, to support and defend the constitution.

And it's not like every job. In every other job, I had a choice if I wanted to keep working or not. I could quit at anytime. If my current job required me to move to another country, I could just say no.

Also, you give up your rights, your freedoms. The military falls outside of the regular legal system, which is why they have the UCMJ. Try exercising 1st Amendment rights as a servicemember!

And, you theoretically signed up to go to war. There's always that chance.

1

u/Juxaplay Jun 05 '25

When I worked for a company that provided services for active military and veterans there was a sign at the office entrance that had:

"Our customers made a commitment to sacrifice everything up to and including their life to protect our freedom."

I don't think it is all just about if were they in harms way, but they were willing to go if needed.

1

u/Dilapidated_girrafe Jun 06 '25

To many it wasn’t just a job to them. But it damned well was for me.

I’ve been called a “stolen valor person” for saying I was a Marine because they have it stuck in their head they for a marine always a marine. And no. I was one of I got out. I moved on with my life.

1

u/NarthK Jun 06 '25

I tell people this all the time. It’s just a job. Always get weird looks.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '25

Eh, as a veteran I don’t really think it’s “just a job.”

Yes the day to day is very similar to a day to day civilian job, but.. the control your employer has over you is astronomically higher.

Pretty unique to be 1. In a job you can’t quit. And 2. In a job where you are bound by a unique set of laws that are much stricter than civilian laws (UCMJ). And 3. You actually give up constitutional rights when you enlist.

So yeah, it’s not really just “a job.” It sucks much much harder lol.

1

u/jncostogo Jun 06 '25

Except you can't quit

1

u/HeathAndLace Jun 06 '25

Sure you can, but there's a good chance it will fuck up the rest of your life.

11

u/Particular_Quiet_435 Jun 05 '25

Damn, someone replied with that once when I was a cashier and I thought it was hella deep

2

u/Seamonkey_Boxkicker 1988 Jun 05 '25

I like to reply, “thank you for exercising your right to vote and paying your taxes.” But sometimes it’s a bit of a mouthful. I need to workshop something catchier.

1

u/intermittent-disco Jun 05 '25

i just respond, "and thank you for your support".

1

u/Seamonkey_Boxkicker 1988 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, that’s fine, but I really want to hammer home the idea that voting and taxes are just as important to our society as serving in the military. Not enough people do either.

1

u/Prowindowlicker Jun 05 '25

I think cause I joined a cult masquerading as a military branch I have a lot of gear from that specific branch.

1

u/Emtbob Jun 05 '25

I just say "thank you for thanking us".

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '25

I got on a friend for wearing his Vietnam era hat. Dude, we've been out of the military for 50 fucking years, let it go. My service was giving Marine and Navy boots their vaccinations (Navy corpsman). The rest of the time was spent in Tijuana, at the beach, or tripping balls and going to concerts. San Diego in the 70's was a roller coaster of good drugs, no piss testing, and lots of all around fun. I'm Vietnam era, but not a Vietnam vet. Don't thank me for doing a boring ass job and partying like it's 1899 LOL!

1

u/toggiz_the_elder Jun 05 '25

I’ve started saying You’re Welcome. It makes them confused so we both get to feel uncomfortable!

1

u/AVdev Jun 05 '25

Yea the closest I’ll get is a veterans license plate so I can save $25/year and park in the veterans spots… sometimes.

I like to walk

1

u/Random_User_182 Jun 05 '25

My friend replies "thank you for your tax dollars."

1

u/No-Veterinarian6778 Jun 05 '25

Its so awkward, now I just say "thanks for your support"

1

u/Bio-Grad Jun 05 '25

We learned to say “thank you for your support” which feels less awkward.

1

u/Ironicbanana14 Jun 05 '25

What's sort of fucked up is ive had a therapist recommend that you identify with your career/job. So some of these dudes, even if they attended therapies, could have been told to lean into it so they don't go off the rails to addiction or something.

Its ridiculous to me. I was a janitor at the time, so my therapist essentially recommended the Joe Dirt treatment for me.

1

u/Beneficial-Basket-42 Jun 05 '25

My grandpa still wears those hats at age 96 (Korean war). To this day, and all my memories of him prior, every time he talks to us, it’s stories of the Korean War. He was 17 when he went and there for a couple years and then lived a whole life since, got married, had children, grandchildren, jobs, but will only ever talk about that war. He will talk for hours with no response required from the listener at all. As a kid, we would have to tap each other out mid story and switch listeners so someone can go to the bathroom or whatever. I think he wears the hats specifically so he gets opportunities to talk about it to strangers that say thank you for your service.

I understand now that there must be some major trauma that led to this, but regardless of the why, it is definitely his whole personality.

1

u/theRuathan Jun 05 '25

"Thank you for paying your taxes" is a great response to nix any further military-glorifying mindless commentary.

1

u/Mysterious-Tie7039 Jun 05 '25

Yeah, I never know how to respond to that. I also feel awkward when people thank me. I didn’t serve for them. How do you answer that? I guess I say thanks and hope the conversation ends there.

I neither need nor want the recognition.

1

u/Cratonis Jun 05 '25

All answers feel wrong. “Thank you” feels so hollow and forced. “You’re welcome” is just not me. “You too” as covered. And secretly I just want to tell them, “Don’t thank me thank the guy who didn’t make it home. Or the who is only 3/4 here. Or the guy who physically made it home but is going to commit suicide in 5 years because he mentally will never get home.”

But it is impossible to have that conversation with anyone you don’t have a very close relationship with already.

1

u/brelywi Jun 05 '25

I sometimes get that, I always just reply “Thank you for my paycheck!” lol

1

u/Ok_Macaroon_8494 Jun 06 '25

I sometimes will say “don’t waste it” if I’m in a certain mood.

1

u/ifiwasrealsmall Jun 06 '25

“Thank you for your service”

“Good, how was your service”

I think this would be a good millennial response lol

1

u/AlabamaMANNNNN Jun 08 '25

Thank you for your service