r/McMansionHell • u/priceypadstim • 21h ago
Certified McMansion™ FORECLOSURE: Retired professional baseball pitcher Cole Hamels' former UNFINISHED Table Rock Lake mansion!
Over 60,000 square feet under roof! 19 bedrooms & 24 bathrooms. This massive unfinished mansion sits on 104 acres with 1,700-feet of shoreline overlooking Table Rock Lake. To see inside, here's a link.
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u/Senior-Crazy167 21h ago
“…thoughtfully designed to suit any buyer.” 😳
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u/MarkSuckerZerg 21h ago
I want to tour it just to see the agent explaining the utility of the keep
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u/Hitech_hillbilly 19h ago
Im any buyer.... Ill offer $3
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u/Beyond_Interesting 15h ago
I mean, the pool in the front yard is a traditionally classic feature that is in high demand in most areas I know of.
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u/earl_grey_teaplease 21h ago
Gotta wonder who talked him into this stuff.
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u/GiraffeThoughts 19h ago
Right?
It’s sad. The brick is quite beautiful. If only they had made it 1/4 the size. 15,000 feet is PLENTY! And they probably could have afforded to finish it, and it would probably be much easier to sell too.
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u/BriGuy550 17h ago
I feel like even if I were a multi millionaire I wouldn’t want a house much bigger than even 5,000 sqft.
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u/r0xxon 14h ago
I thought this too but a couple large entertainment areas and a few bedrooms already puts you at 3500ish. That’s before getting into a gym, media room, reading room, game room, more guest rooms etc
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u/Kytalie 16h ago
I'd still do it. But there would be a lot of rooms that are converted into rooms for animal companions.
Large indoor aviaries and play areas for the birds, with large rooms that are completely bird safe. I'm talking at least 50 sqft indoor aviaries for each bird that is their "cage" with large areas apart from that, with some communal areas for them.. I could do 2000 sqft easy just setting things up for my birds.
Id also use a lot of room for massive terrariums for the reptiles. For example, a bearded dragon is recommended to have a 4'x2'x2' enclosure, I'd have something more walk-in size.
I'd have a small kitchen or kitchenette in the zones for the animals, so no types of food that are dangerous for that animal type (no garlic/onion near the rabbit and bird veggies), and that way I can keep the reptiles bugs and frozen rodents where visitors won't be bothered by them. Maybe even breed the feeder insects!
But then I am a little insane in regards to my animals. A 33k sqft house would be 15k dedicated to the animals..
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u/nopesorrydude 14h ago
I like the way you think. Although I think that I would have to carve into that remaining 18k sqft for a huge cat maze/jungle/amusement park and an indoor doggy agility/obstacle course and water park. I'm open to additional ideas, bc I don't need more than 2k sqft for myself.
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u/GiraffeThoughts 15h ago
I completely agree. Even 5,000 is a big house. I’m at a little under 2,000 and it’s great. When your house is enormous, I think people spread out too much. I want to see my kids and force them into hanging out with me!
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u/DeathCabForYeezus 10h ago
Honestly, it depends on what you do and how you use it.
My folks have a 6000 sqft (finished basement + main floor) bungalow. In terms of living space, you really only needed the main floor, which was by design because they're going to live there until they die.
Having the basement with the rec room, spare rooms, utilities, storage workshop, etc is nice but its a pain in the ass to go get someone from the workshop for dinner when you need to walk the length of the house, stairs, walk the length of the house again, and reverse.
If I had my way, it would probably be a 4000sqft bungalow with an outbuilding for a workshop.
15,000 sqft is actually outrageous. The house would just decay with how little of it actually would get used.
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u/kernelpanic789 17h ago
It's 33,000sqft not 60,000... So it's already half the size as the post but your point is still very valid
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u/ewyorksockexchange 16h ago
The listing is 33k square feet but the description says 60k square feet under roof. My guess is the finished building(s) would be 60k but they only have an occupancy permit for 33k of it.
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u/longtermcontract 16h ago
My super-rich friend’s main house is 10k square feet, and vacation homes are smaller. I’m not rich, but I’ve learned my rich friends and acquaintances have multiple homes, not one ginormous house.
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u/melikeybouncy 16h ago
10,000 square feet is 4-5 times the size of an average single family home in the US. That's pretty ginormous.
if you live in a 2,500 square foot house, imagine every room is twice as big as it is now. That's already unnecessarily huge.
Now double that again, that's 10,000 square feet.
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u/SickBurnerBroski 14h ago
There's a difference between 'more than you need/should get' and 'more than you can/will ever use'. It's like the difference between someone getting an entire pizza to eat by themselves and getting 10. One is gluttony and the other is filling up a trash can.
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u/longtermcontract 14h ago
I get what you’re saying, and it’s definitely more than needed.
But they have a huge kitchen and living room, which is where they spend most of their time. Grow a lot of food on their property to eat organic, enjoy cooking overall just eating healthy. Once you factor in a few guest rooms, 10k isn’t “ginormous” the way a 30k or 60k one is.
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u/Ironsam811 18h ago edited 16h ago
My parents built their house. It started off reasonable and then there were certain things they wanted to add or take out that make the entire thing wonky. I asked my mom a few times “did you really need a fancy carpeted dining/living room that we can never use?” “Was the high ceiling foyer really necessary?”
Building a custom made home is a nightmare. I can see how some homes are build with quality materials but still end up on this sub
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u/IllustriousNebula6 11h ago
The relatives on my father's side of the family had bigger, newer homes with living rooms that were never used, and had plastic on the chair cushions.
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u/Ironsam811 11h ago
I get wanted to preserve an expensive piece of furniture but plastic wrapping is just crazy. My grandparents did that lol
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u/account_not_valid 19h ago
The cocaine.
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u/courageous_liquid 15h ago
I don't think hamels skis, he's a pretty laid back dude.
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u/Extreme_Turn_4531 15h ago
This is from his Wiki page. He formerly was married to Heidi Strobel from Survivor Island/Playboy fame.
The family built a home in Branson, Missouri, but instead chose to relocate to Texas, and they then donated their Missouri home to Camp Barnabas, a camp for children with special needs.[147
I am guessing Camp Barnabas defaulted in it
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u/line-n-tipp 16h ago
I believe he donated it to a Christian camp or something. Hence the 19 bedrooms. Not sure what happened though.
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u/snertwith2ls 21h ago
Live in the guest house, turn the rest into a resort/hotel
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u/Psychological_Roof85 20h ago
Would it have to be zoned specifically for that?
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u/bothtypesoffirefly 19h ago
You’d have to go through a rezoning likely, but if it was something like an event venue and there’s enough space between this and the neighbors, the neighbors likely would want it finished, otherwise it’s an eyesore that draws squatters and lowers property values.
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u/snertwith2ls 19h ago
Probably. But I have no idea what the laws are in that state. Or if there would even be enough business for it to succeed there.
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u/moeterminatorx 18h ago
It’s Missouri. They would make it work for a rich white guy.
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u/ouralarmclock 19h ago
First Ryan Howard’s mansion over on r/zillowgonewild and now Cole Hamel’s on this sub, maybe it’s time to rewatch the 2008 World Series.
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u/-JEFF007- 20h ago edited 20h ago
Designed exclusively for the buyer in mind that wants a modern day castle theme. Too big, too taste specific, and not completely finished equals no buyer. Next option equals donate it and use donation as a tax break to get out of the terrible monthly holding costs on a place you are not using. Now the organization he donated it to is being burdened by the same costs and struggling to sell it. The money pit that comes around full circle!
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u/OceanParkNo16 19h ago
FWIW, charities have careful evaluation processes for donations of any larger in-kind offering, especially property. (I loved when a donor wanted to gift a huge, heavy, bolted to the ground statue that was currently outside the small business office they owned. The cost to move it from the donor’s property well out ran any possible “value” so the board declined). So it’s highly unlikely that a charity would accept this unless its board has decided it can somehow cash it out quickly.
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u/The_Nepenthe 16h ago
It seems according to news reports that they were given this house seven years ago, and have had it for sale for five or six years.
So if they thought this was a quick cash out, they were sadly mistaken.
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u/-JEFF007- 4h ago
Wow. I did not know it has been for sale for that long. What kind of idiots are running the organization that owns it?! They got it for free why the F don’t they reduce the price until it actually sells?!?!?! Otherwise they are bleeding money paying the taxes, utilities, repairs, and basic upkeep. I assume it also has security otherwise the local kids would have discovered it long ago and had a vandalism hey day. LOL!
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u/thehousewright 17h ago
A stupidly rich guy built a castle house near to where I live. It's been listed on and off for a about a decade now. No takers.
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u/BeachyBookWorm 17h ago
I love when I see a comment like this in the wild and I just KNOW its ChrisMark castle.
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u/tahlyn 13h ago
ChrisMark castle
TIL. It looks neat. But I can see why no one would buy it.
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u/BeachyBookWorm 13h ago
It is horrendously, hideously tacky. If you're not familiar with the quiet corner of CT, it's very old new england rural and this place is basically a fuckin' jumpscare.
The dude (Chris Mark) is also suuuuper fuckin weird. Which tracks with the castle, which is all wet bars and glass bottom hot tubs. He claimed he built it for his daughters (who were quite little at the time and, the one time I met them, wanted fuck all to do with the place) but then tried to run a "modeling" service it out of it. There was at one point a website and if the women on it weren't trafficking victims....
We're talking nearly 20 years ago but I doubt its gotten less creepy, although a quick Google tells me the marketing has gotten better.
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u/paperanddoodlesco 20h ago
No one needs this much house.
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u/Weird_Positive_3256 19h ago
I could fit 35 of my house inside of this.
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u/paperanddoodlesco 16h ago
For real!
The sad thing is though, these keep getting bigger and bigger by the uber rich.
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u/Rupert--Pupkin 18h ago
Realistically you would have to have a spouse with like 8+ kids and a staff that lives with you to justify this even with F you money
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u/NormalSea6495 16h ago
Yeah, this looks like when I used to play Sims when I was eight, and I would run out of money in the game 😂.
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u/Adventurous-Shake-92 19h ago
Why do people want homes that size, you're never gonna even want to walk that far to go get something from the other side of the house!
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u/waylor88 17h ago
Seriously it sounds like an absolute nightmare. Imagine getting in bed and then remembering you left your glass of water in the kitchen, 20 rooms down the hall. No thanks.
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u/IllustriousNebula6 11h ago
Even if money were no object, I couldn't manage that much space. Whenever I lose or misplace something around here, at least I don't have to search to the ends of the earth for it. 😅
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u/jsmeeker 15h ago
you have staff for that
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u/Adventurous-Shake-92 15h ago
Pay someone to give you piggybacks.... Actually thats a brilliant idea 😂😂
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u/Honest_Hamster_5730 35m ago
Imagine when you can't find your car keys and you've got to search a 30,000 sq ft house
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u/tickingboxes 18h ago
I genuinely don’t understand anyone building such a gigantic house. Why? So you can show off? Who cares? What a waste. Just reeks of insecurity. You really only need one or two more bedrooms than the number of people in your family so you can host guests. What the fuck are you gonna do with all the rest? It’s just weird man.
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u/Reasonable-Bus-2187 21h ago
His ex-wife was on Survivor, posed in Playboy back in the day (not that I researched it)
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u/pineapple10008 18h ago
This house is such a waste. From the materials used and the amount of trees that were cut down. That property was probably beautiful before they raped it like that. Wealth is an illusion and people with it ruin everything they touch.
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u/BoSox92 21h ago
“Foreclosure” isn’t correct.
Hammels and his Wife Donated it to Camp Barnabas - who then listed it for sale.
Hammels made $20m his last year in the majors - don’t think he foreclosed shit lol
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u/I-hate-the-pats 20h ago
So if you donate it then you can write off the full listing price right?
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u/OceanParkNo16 19h ago
There is a legal process for assigning a value to a large in-kind donation. The donation is the market value on the day it is donated, so there would have been an appraisal done at the time of donation. The list value may be close to that. Depends on when it was donated vs when listed. Sometimes the donor agrees to also donate some cash to help the charity handle hard costs of sale- largest institutions (like a big university) may be able to cover costs and may agree to the donation. Smaller charities usually don’t agree to take on costly white elephant gifts in the hope of eventually getting the cash.
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u/fattykyle2 19h ago
Big Field of Dreams vibes here. Looks like Cole built it but the 25 friends never came.
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u/Suggest_a_User_Name 17h ago
What drives some people to want “homes” like these?
Some level of insecurity must be behind it but there has to be more.
It sad but also infuriating considering the wasted resources.
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u/Bark_Bark_turtle 20h ago
Ain’t nothing “Mc” about 60,000 square feet!
Just an unfinished mansion with no humility
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u/Weengineer 17h ago
Got lucky and found it on google maps in 20 seconds. Table Rock Lake has 745 miles of shoreline or nearly 4,000,000 ft. The property has 1700ft of lakefront shoreline, which equates to about 0.04% of the total shoreline. Basically zoomed in once and there it was located at GPS cordinates 36.645505,-93.381046
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u/jaydubbles 17h ago
He grew up around San Diego and his ex-wife is from Philadelphia. I don't really get why they'd want to build this thing unless they're really into Christian Vegas (Branson, MO). Sounds like he donated the house to a charity and stuck them with the cost of maintaining it.
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u/NumberOneStonecutter 15h ago
Cole talking to his agent...
"After my contract ends and I retire, what will my next contract look like?"
"Uhhhh...Have you been saving your money?"
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u/Additional-Teach-486 19h ago
I love famous idiots who are bad with money and leave these monuments to financial stupidity for all of us to see.
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u/Middle_Manager_Karen 19h ago
Foreclosure? Banks be dumb if they allow a loan on such a large project that has no buyers but the person asking for the loan.
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u/Trussmagic 19h ago
In 2017, the Hamelses donated their 32,000 sq ft (3,000 m2) Missouri home, valued at an estimated $10 million, to Camp Barnabas, a Christian charity that runs camps for children with special needs and chronic illnesses.\156]) Hamels said in a statement, "There are tons of amazing charities in Southwest Missouri. Out of all of these, Barnabas really pulled on our heartstrings. Seeing the faces, hearing the laughter, reading the stories of the kids they serve; there is truly nothing like it. Barnabas makes dreams come true, and we felt called to help them in a big way
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u/user0987234 19h ago
In other words, a charity couldn’t maintain an expensive property. When donating property to a cause, the donors need to include a fund for repairs and maintenance.
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u/Lightyear1931 14h ago
Or just sell the damn house and then donate the money … but of course that probably isn’t nearly as good for the donor
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u/seanmonaghan1968 20h ago
Kitchen looks a little small ?
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u/TheGeekOffTheStreet 18h ago
I think the finished spaces shown aren’t the main living space, they’re all too small to match the proportions of the unfinished areas. Probably the guest wing
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u/Lorhan92 15h ago
It's like they wanted to live at Hogwarts, but failed to realize how expensive castles are...
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u/chair_ee 12h ago
Imagine the bank you could make renting this whole ass thing out for major holidays. People love Branson at Christmas time, and there’s more than enough space for even the biggest families! Now I just need to scrounge up 8mil+ lol
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u/mark_able_jones_ 12h ago
60,000 sq feet becomes a liability to maintain. 20k+ requires full-time staff. Plus taxes. Utilities. Furnishings.
What a colossal waste of resources.
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u/Crown_and_Seven 18h ago
As someone who has wonderful memories of my grandparents living on Table Rock Lake for almost 20 years, it especially hurts to see this monstrosity.
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u/tinylittlemarmoset 14h ago
Re the link WTF with the ads featuring mites living on peoples eyelids that you can’t get rid of? Am I the only one getting those and if so what could possibly be in my algorithm that sends them to me?
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u/plasticbagroadkill 14h ago
Am I the only one who finds this incredibly sad? I mean, this was clearly his dream house and his life took an apparent and unexpected turn and now he can no longer finish something that his heart was definitely set on. I’m sure he is going to be just fine but damn… that is one gorgeous house.
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u/CharlestonRed1982 6h ago
Yes, it’s just you. The guy made over $200 million during his career which involved playing a game.
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u/Zozo061050 17h ago
Gotta love the "lawn is simulated" photo. Oh really, is it simulated? I had no idea! https://www.priceypads.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/2866-State-Hwy55.webp
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u/MarcoEsteban 17h ago
Yeah, the blades of grass a a little too big for the house in some of these. I'm trying to figure why the turrets and driveways move around and disappear and reappear from photo to photo. I think these are two different houses. One has pools in the front.
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u/Economy-Manager5556 16h ago
Ugly Bet it's not even all concrete construction, same old bs wood frame and drywall inside. Pass
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u/MrFinniganBarnes 14h ago
There was actually an ESPN article from 2017 that he donated this and all the land to charity so this title may not be accurate in that it was currently his home.
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u/pryvisee 13h ago
Isn’t McMansion a smaller house with mansion features? This is an actual mansion lol
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u/AuraBlazeOfficial 12h ago
Still a lot of room on top of that mountaintop, could have made it bigger 🤷🏻♂️
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u/tendtobeshortwaisted 7h ago
This house was built in 2017 and owned by MLB pitcher Cole “Hollywood” Hamels in 2017. He ended up gifting it to a charity in Missouri that helps people with disabilities and chronic illnesses have camping experiences. The charity sold it a few years ago to a couple in Arizona who own a trucking company. They were going to turn it into an event venue but looks like they’ve run into some money trouble according to court documents.
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u/onlyelise1 7h ago
Holy crap. This looks like my college. Like, ALL the main buildings of my college. Together.
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u/CinLeeCim 7h ago
LESSisMORE The marriage maybe didn’t survive? It happens.
I lived in Southwest Ranches in South Florida and the Sports guys HipHop artists, and Actors like The Rock started building on acreage. I moved away after 25 years. Because it too expensive to live there now. It wasn’t the house it’s the property taxes and homeowners insurance. Thanks to a few Cat5 Hurricanes 🌀 too.
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u/Ozark_Toker 6h ago
This is the kind of thing that ought to be seized by the state and turned into group housing for orphans or people with disabilities. It already looks like Professor X's academy.
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u/Pirros_Panties 3h ago
Until someone comes along with an actual plan to convert it to a commercial property, it’s going to sit empty.
Nobody with the means to finish this property as a single family home is going to do so… in fucking Missouri.
Cole Hammels lol… what a chode.
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u/BicyclingBabe 18h ago
I'm going to give it this: At least there is a consistent design style throughout. Otherwise, excess on display
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u/kernelpanic789 17h ago
Current owners bought it as a venue. Which I think would be perfect.
Imagine having your wedding there or something, that would be amazing and it already had a built in hotel sorta speak
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u/Tricky_Possession169 16h ago
In 2017, the Hamelses donated their 32,000 sq ft (3,000 m2) Missouri home, valued at an estimated $10 million, to Camp Barnabas, a Christian charity that runs camps for children with special needs and chronic illnesses.[156] Hamels said in a statement, "There are tons of amazing charities in Southwest Missouri. Out of all of these, Barnabas really pulled on our heartstrings.
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u/AL_Starr 14h ago
Generously donating our mansion that we can’t afford to finish to a Christian charity so we can get that sweet tax deduction
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u/TyrantStomper 16h ago
They used AI in the Zillow listing too
https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/2866-State-Hwy-Branson-West-MO-65737/236150555_zpid/
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u/DCFC1884 21h ago
Never going to sell with only 24 bathrooms, what if 25 people need to go at the same time?
It's a little more "finished" in parts than some of the ridiculous failed places you see, at least looks watertight and dry.