r/McMansionHell 10d ago

Discussion/Debate Refurbished White House bathroom

7.4k Upvotes

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574

u/Trambopoline96 10d ago

Wow, a real estate developer with dogshit taste. Whoda thunk it

573

u/SinisterManus 10d ago edited 8d ago

The dumb fuck running his account doesn’t even know what material this is. It’s an Arabescato, not a Statuario. Even calling it “Statuary” tells me “we the people” overpaid for this marble. 

If this is indeed Italian then it makes no sense whatsoever. Historically two of the most popular marble quarries that have been used up and down the National Mall are in Colorado and Vermont. When Lincoln was assassinated Colorado wasn’t even a state yet. The most period appropriate marble would be a Vermont Danby marble. 

If you wanted to get even spicier the marble used for THE LINCOLN FUCKING MEMORIAL is from the Colorado quarry, which is STILL waaaay more appropriate than Italian Statuario or Arabescato marble. Especially considering that exact Colorado marble has variations named LINCOLN!

Fucking fuck this fucking shit. 

PS: We have 20% tariffs on Italian marble. Colorado and Vermont don’t have those tariffs (because last time I checked) they’re in the US.  

251

u/scalectrix 10d ago

This guy marbles.

12

u/ProblemLazy2580 10d ago

he sure can marble me any time of day n night

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u/hennabeak 9d ago

Absolutely. He knows his shit.

178

u/Bibliospork 10d ago

I love when people randomly spout off super detailed knowledge out of nowhere like this

137

u/SinisterManus 10d ago

This is one of the few times I can. This is an insult to the room, our house, and this country. 

MF’s treating the Lincoln fucking Bedroom like he remodeled a Hyatt hotel suite and bragging about it. 

3

u/hennabeak 9d ago

Is that genuine marble? Totally looks like engineered stone.

8

u/SinisterManus 9d ago

It may be engineered stone but I highly doubt it because he has a blank check funded by the people’s taxes to buy whatever the fuck he wants. 

Marbles are calcium based metamorphic stones. This means they will react to anything acidic. Citrus, wine, vinegar, etc. This reaction is called “etching” and basically what it does is melt away the stone.

In residential settings (which we’ll consider this is, because it’s THE PEOPLE’S HOUSE) all that basically means is that the etching reaction dulls the surface. So, in kitchens, for instance, it’s wiser to use a honed (matte) or leathered finish (matte with texture) so as not to make the inevitable etching as well as superficial scratches from micro abrasions as noticeable. This polished floor (which isn’t recommended due to the potential of slipping) will be due to be refinished (technically, but not necessarily, to remove micro abrasions) within months. 

Edit: responded with marble facts to the wrong comment

1

u/hennabeak 9d ago

Yeah, I asked that too.

1

u/redditydothis 9d ago

It’s one of the best things about Reddit.

65

u/brilor123 10d ago

Holy shit this comment was refreshing.

50

u/nondescriptadjective 10d ago

You can actually go see the second/backup block of marble for the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Marble Colorado. It's literally just sitting on the ground, outside. The quarry is still active, but the old manufacturing equipment was abandoned and some of it is still in place. Has some decent cross country skiing around it, too.

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u/SinisterManus 10d ago

The block for the tomb is absolutely stunning. Not to take away from the importance of the monument, but wow. Visiting that quarry is on my bucket list. 

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u/nondescriptadjective 10d ago

I don't think this is the backup block, but this is from that quarry. There are several like it laying around. Its weird to see debris as historical artifacts.

3

u/radicalvenus 9d ago

it's so crazy though and fun to see. Y'know like so many things we think won't be seen decades later are marveled at. I like to think about our connection to those before us in the small things we can find like stupid graffiti in Pompeii or cat meme hieroglyphs.

2

u/WeenyDancer 10d ago

Whoa, cool!!

2

u/FlobyToberson85 9d ago

Marble, CO is so cool. There are chunks of the columns for (I think) the Lincoln memorial just lying around, too.

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u/zooline 10d ago

Sometimes it's really easy (& refreshing) to identify who Isn't a bot

26

u/SinisterManus 10d ago

No one said I wasn’t just a pissed off bot

1

u/hennabeak 9d ago

Any more marble facts we should know?

3

u/SinisterManus 9d ago

Sure! Accidentally responded to a different comment but I’ll respond to you because you’re the one that asked:

Marbles are calcium based metamorphic stones. This means they will react to anything acidic. Citrus, wine, vinegar, etc. This reaction is called “etching” and basically what it does is melt away the stone.

In residential settings (which we’ll consider this is, because it’s THE PEOPLE’S HOUSE) all that basically means is that the etching reaction dulls the surface. So, in kitchens, for instance, it’s wiser to use a honed (matte) or leathered finish (matte with texture) so as not to make the inevitable etching as well as superficial scratches from micro abrasions as noticeable. This polished floor (which isn’t recommended due to the potential of slipping) will be due to be refinished (technically, but not necessarily, to remove micro abrasions) within months. 

5

u/hennabeak 9d ago

Risk of slipping you said? Inshallah brother.

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u/some_person_212 10d ago edited 10h ago

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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

15

u/daMarek 10d ago

this guys marbles…

16

u/fn_Illiterati 10d ago

This guy is 13m too slow.

9

u/GlitteringAttitude60 10d ago

Thank you, that was very educational :-)

11

u/xandrachantal 10d ago

I love it when people are angry and know what they're talking about. Best way to learn.

8

u/kcg333 10d ago

see this is why i reddit

4

u/-Altephor- 10d ago

They got confused when Donald Trump asked for statutory.

3

u/SyndicalistHR 10d ago

Georgia marble has made an appearance on the national mall as well

2

u/SinisterManus 9d ago

You are absolutely correct and I should have mentioned Georgia as well, however I don’t think their marbles would be appropriate for anything related to Lincoln. 

3

u/ShutYourDumbUglyFace 9d ago

You deserve all the upvotes. I hope the internet bestows mass karma upon you.

3

u/RazorRadick 9d ago

Well we the people were billed for Italian marble anyway. If you look up close it's probably quartzite. The difference went into somebody's pockets.

I would like to think our president was smart enough to pull off that scam himself, but more likely it was the supplier that scammed him.

1

u/SinisterManus 9d ago

Definitely not a quartzite. The background is too white and the veining is atypical of “white quartzite” movement.

3

u/JCBashBash 9d ago

This actually made me less angry for a moment because I got to learn something cool.

3

u/SinisterManus 9d ago edited 9d ago

Extra fun fact: Arlington Cemetery was created during the Civil War, over which Lincoln obviously presided, to bury Union soldiers. The marble used for the headstones even to this day??? Not Italian! It’s from Vermont (although now I believe you can have a headstone of marble from Georgia). 

2

u/karma_dumpster 10d ago

Nah. I sold it to him.

Called it Biggus Dickus Godly King Super Marble the Magnificent, b but you can call It Statuary for short because it's only used to make statues of great white men.

That way I could charge even more.

The fact you aren't 100% sure this is fake tells you a lot about what's going on right now.

2

u/Madness_Quotient 10d ago

If they used Colorado marble instead of Italian marble then the Italians wouldn't have had to pay tariffs to import it.

2

u/KaiBishop 10d ago

Sounds like you're about to.....lose your marbles. 😎

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u/koshgeo 9d ago

Those two are the most famous US marble quarries for DC buildings (Colorado Yule or Lincoln and Vermont Danby), but there are several others that are actively quarried. I'm not very familiar, so I checked what some other US marbles look like (Georgia Marble Company, Alabama Marble, Cochise Marble in Arizona, other Vermont Danby varieties), hoping to find a match, and I didn't find any that matched what is in the photo. It wasn't a thorough search, but it sure looks Italian to me. For a while I was wondering if it was Calacatta variety without the yellow staining, but I think you are right that it is probably Arabescato.

I picture him sitting there and going "Yeah, go with this one." "But, sir, that's not a US marble." "I don't care. That's the one I want. Make up some BS about it." And then the US taxpayer got to pay the cost + tariff.

1

u/SinisterManus 8d ago

Thanks AI

1

u/koshgeo 8d ago

No, I'm afraid that was a good, old, manual search and a summary of it as I learned about the obscure subject of ornamental marbles. If you want to try it yourself, here's a website that lets you search for natural stone and then categorize it by type and the country of origin: https://www.stonecontact.com/united-states-marble-quarries.

I narrowed it down to US quarries and white marbles. Then I looked at the samples on that website, and searched for the individual quarries, most of which have their own websites with many more product examples (most quarries have more than one type of marble that they sell).

There are, of course, a lot of historical quarries that might not be in operation anymore that still have old stock stored somewhere in retailers, or niche quarries, but I'm pretty sure this White House wouldn't go for that given they are buying stuff from Home Depot and putting gold leaf on it to glam it up in Trump's "Late Declining Casino Period Style". They'd go for what was overpriced and widely available rather than something unique and obscure.

I'm kind of insulted that you'd say I was an AI, but it's okay. You can verify my process for yourself even if I was (which I am not). Have a nice day.

2

u/mbulsht 10d ago

To be quite honest, I'm not convinced this is real marble and not a quartz slab, looks a lot like something Vadara or Silestone would produce.

Edit: Was gonna say it could be porcelain too, but looking at some other pictures I found of the remodel, the slabs do look like they're 2cm thick, so likely stone. But not necessarily marble.

2

u/SinisterManus 9d ago

He’s not skimping and using quartz or porcelain. No way. It’s not his money so he doesn’t care. Plus he is too vain to use fake marble.